4 and half year old pooping in pants

[rosesgl]

I am taking care of my bff's two kids. Her daughter is 9 and her son is 4 and a half. I have known the kids since they were born. My friend is going is going away for training for summer so I am taking care of them this summer. My friend is a single parent and she really did not potty train her son the daycare did. Well now I have him for the summer and he poops in his pants. He does not do it at daycare but he does when he is home. What am I supposed to do? My friend tells me to spank him but I do not want to do that.

[RockRose]

You're right,  don't spank him.  Your friend seems to lack parenting skills,   and parenting love,   and now she's disappeared and left you with her two children for the whole summer.  

God bless you for taking care of them - what a giving person you must be.

Look up encopresis on the internet - it sounds like that's what he probably has.  If this sounds right,  give him lots of bran fiber and see if that helps.

Again,  bless you for taking these children,  they will probably benefit from your support.

[Cleveland Mom]

Do not spank this child!  Doing so may set up long-term problems.  If mom has spanked him because of toileting accidents, this may in part explain his toileting problem.  I cannot say for certain, however.  I agree with RockRose, Google encopresis.  In my experience quite a few boys struggle with pooping in the toilet.  Often time, urine training them is fairly easy but they continue to have difficulties pooping in the toilet.  My 4 year old son, has had his fair share of pooping accidents.  

Do you have authorization to access medical care for these kids?  Do you have the name and phone number for their pediatrician/family doctor?  Do you have their health insurance cards?  What if they experience a medical problem or a medical emergency?  If you cannot answer these questions with certaintly, you need to contact mom and get this information.  You can contact the pediatrician's office and speak to a nurse about the toileting problems, this person can advise you.

Whats up with your so-called BFF, leaving her young kids with you for the summer?  Good luck...