my son tested for Asperger’s?

[judeaboo]

I would love any help I can get. My son is 9 years old. He will be 10 in April. He is a triplet (baby "C").
He is so very different from other 9 year olds. He talks about these friends at school but, he never plays with anyone at recess. He will talk in a baby voice and jump up and down like a baby. Other kids stare at him and wonder why he is doing these things. He is compliant and is never defiant in his behavior. He forgets everything. He is extremely disorganized. He is also very lazy. He is willing to take a lower grade in school if it means no homework or studying. He will never go the extra mile .His grades are great for a person that doesn't put in any effort.He has 3 B's 3 C's 1 D.  He does what you tell him to as long as he doesn't forget. He is a very loving person!!!!!!! He just seems like he stopped maturing at age 4.  I love him so much and really do want to help him. He is also very overweight and has ongoing sinus and ear problems. He also has asthma and reflux. He gets weekly allergy shots due to severe allergies. He's on several asthma and allergy med's. Please let me know what I can do to help him or what steps I would need to take to get him help. He is so lovable! Thank you ever so much for you help!!!!!

[avonlea]

My son also is 9 and he has Aspergers. Your son sound just like mine, he knew everyone at school but never really plays with anyone.  He likes to people watch. He can't carry a conversation with other kids because he jumps from topic to topic, only talking about what he wants to talk about. As for school I just got him in a program called the resource room you might want to see if your school offers it. It’s a class that will help him learn to interact with other children and help with school work its more hands on for him so he’s more interested and doesn’t forget as easy. My son also had a lot of ear problems it’s very common in Asperger children. They are very smart and usually excel in one topic. My son's is math. Learning wasn’t my big problem with him it was seeing how he watch other children and seemed like he wanted to play just didn’t know how. Even at his own birthday he would be over in the corner playing by himself. Now that he has started this new class in the resource room he has made very close friends with other children with Aspergers. You need to call your school and ask for an I E P it’s just a meeting to help identify what help your child needs and where. Wither it be social or academics or maybe both. Either way you have to be that one to stand of for your son and say he needs help. Or teachers will just right him off as a bad kid and he will slip threw the cracks and will never get the help he needs now.  So talk to your doctor your school. Stand up for him because no one else will.

[SueNYC]

Request that your school do a NESPY (you will probably need permission - we paid for it ourselves).  We have had three well known doctors and one well known Asberger's expert look at him - there is no consensus - but he sounds like my son.  He is going to a school with Asberger's kids and loves it.  He did nothing for three yers in school (he got N/A on his report cards) but he excelled in reading (he reads on a college level) and he is pretty good and math.  He is highly disorganized and can't write a good essay w/o going off topic.    Anyway, his school challenges him academically and he has made friends (though I would give him a F in social skills).  Anyway, the testing helped and the neuropsychologist gave us a lot
of great ideas.  I also think he has a touch of Asbergers (his voice is pretty normal and he through the docs on his inferential skills -but one of them attribitutes some of the more surprising results to his IQ).  But on the executive dysfunction tests he came in around 10%.  I am glad that he is not oppositional - mine is and it can be a nightmare.

Hire a child advocate.  It ,akes all the difference in finding out what provisions can be made for your son - school social workers and IEP teams are pretty closed mouthed on your rights.

[SueNYC]

Request that your school do a NESPY (you will probably need permission - we paid for it ourselves).  We have had three well known doctors and one well known Asberger's expert look at him - there is no consensus - but he sounds like my son.  He is going to a school with Asberger's kids and loves it.  He did nothing for three yers in school (he got N/A on his report cards) but he excelled in reading (he reads on a college level) and he is pretty good and math.  He is highly disorganized and can't write a good essay w/o going off topic.    Anyway, his school challenges him academically and he has made friends (though I would give him a F in social skills).  Anyway, the testing helped and the neuropsychologist gave us a lot
of great ideas.  I also think he has a touch of Asbergers (his voice is pretty normal and he through the docs on his inferential skills -but one of them attribitutes some of the more surprising results to his IQ).  But on the executive dysfunction tests he came in around 10%.  I am glad that he is not oppositional - mine is and it can be a nightmare.

Hire a child advocate.  It ,akes all the difference in finding out what provisions can be made for your son - school social workers and IEP teams are pretty closed mouthed on your rights.

[Grandmother1941]

I agree with the others regarding an IEP and a 504 Federal medical evaluation from the School.  The Federal Gov. has accepted Aspergers as a Disability.  Try to get him involved in outside activities, like Karate and Boys Scouts, which were recommended by our school.  Or any activity where he can show his Talent, be it sports, music, bowling, etc.  Also show an interest and attend his functions.  Encourage him to make just one friend - like a Buddy.  Aspergers find groups overwhelming.  Does he have a Pet, that is just his?  Does he have a special interest?  Make the school own up to it's responsibilities and follow through.

[babesmissy]

i would'nt recomend a pet for a while,asperger's children in most case's are physically voilent. where about's are you from? i'm very familiar with this disease and where to go for help

[MaryannesMom]

I disagree about your pet comment, judeaboo said her son is very loving & not violent.  My ASPIE daughter has a very special connection with her cat that I believes adds greatly to her quality of life (petting her cat calms her when she is upset.  She also feels her cat is the only one who understands her, & claims she can communicate with her cat telepathically).  She would NEVER do anything to harm her cat, no matter how upset or frustrated she was.

[SueNYC]

My son wanted a pet last year.  He loved the Warriors Books (about some cat clans I think) and begged for a cat.  He is more respectful to that kitty than all the other children.  He admonishes his sisters for being too rough with the cat.  The cat sleeps in his room at night (and he has several bedrooms to choose from).  The cat likes to be petted but not held, he is an odd breed with a quirky personality (yowls rather than meows and loves to take baths), he plays when he wants too, and he is picky about his food.  I think they are a perfect match for each other.

He did have some wild ideas like setting mouse free all over the apartment (because he would like the cat to practice his natural instincts) and we haven't got the cat fixed yet (try living with a male stud cat) because he thinks we should breed him.  We know he would be really upset if we snuck him off but I can't wait.  So if anyone has a femal Bengal they want to mate I have a free male stud with an impeccable pedigree - no fee.

Check for allergies first - many kids on the Autsm Spectrum have severe allergies.  

Most Asperger's kids want a friend - and though not a perfect substitute - they can have a very meaningful relationship with an animal.  An animal doesn't judge them.  

[MaryannesMom]

Your son's statement about wanting the cat to practice his natural instincts is so funny to me, because it sounds exactly like something my daughter would say!  Our cat came "fixed", & that really bothers my daughter because she thinks she should be allowed to have kittens.  Of course, she often says the cat didn't need to be fixed, because it was never broken!  

[dld136]

Hi,
My son is 10.  He was having seizures brought on by himself and the doctor mentioned that word Aspergers.  I have brought him to a shrink and he said that he has to work out his own problems. I was shocked to hear that but appreciated that.  He goes to catholic school.  He comes home and complains about the teacher alot.  Has one friend.  He seems to struggle in that department.  I dont know if I am bringing him up the right way or not.  My family has been tormented with mental illness.  My mother was a schizophrenic.  My sister is a paranoid schizophrenic.  I have also been diagnosed with bipolar.  I have several cousins who have schizophrenia.  One aunt with bipolar.

[dld136]

Hi,
My son is 10.  He was having seizures brought on by himself and the doctor mentioned that word Aspergers.  I have brought him to a shrink and he said that he has to work out his own problems. I was shocked to hear that but appreciated that.  He goes to catholic school.  He comes home and complains about the teacher alot.  Has one friend.  He seems to struggle in that department.  I dont know if I am bringing him up the right way or not.  My family has been tormented with mental illness.  My mother was a schizophrenic.  My sister is a paranoid schizophrenic.  I have also been diagnosed with bipolar.  I have several cousins who have schizophrenia.  One aunt with bipolar.