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Does my 4 year old have Aspergers Syndrome?
by sydney12, Feb 20, 2008 10:28AM
My son is 4. I am very worried about some behavior he is exhibiting.
He has a very hard time looking at people, even me, in the face when he is spoken to, especially when we try to discipline. My husband and I have tried for 2 years to get him to look at us when we address him but it is only on his terms. If he wants to speak to us then he will look.
He also gets extremely distracted and will completely zone out if the TV is on. It is nearly impossible to get his attention.
When he is excited about something he does flap his hands and can hardly get his words out, there is a lot of stuttering and talking loudly.
When he is seeing friends his age he doesn't start chatting with them at first he just make some sort of strange hand motion mimicking a scene from a movie, which leads me to one of the other concerning issue, he started speaking in sentences after he turned 3 but so much of talking (especially to himself) are phrases from movies. He will repeat them over and over during the day. After he has warmed up to his friends then he will start playing.
If we do something without TONS of warning- for example take him out of the bath tub- he goes crazy- there is no talking to him- its like he cant even hear. The tantrums are long and he is hyper focused in getting back to the tub so he can do it his way. He always is hitting during his tantrums but if I can catch him in time and warn him sometimes he can stop himself. We try to give him warning but sometimes I feel like he is trying to manipulate us by saying “ok mommy- I need 5 more minutes” over and over. If he has his way the bath would be 2 hours long! His tantrums are violent and terrible. He is completely out of control.
He is very focused on his sister behaving- he cannot handle her not following the rules, he gets so mad he starts to hurt her to make her listen- yet he has no trouble not listening to my husband and I. He is getting a little better at trying to talk to her nicely to get what he wants but there are still a lot of times when he resorts to violence.
He also gets very over stimulated-if we have had a busy day, I know the evenings are going to be bad and sometimes he gets adamant about turning of either TV or radio but that happens randomly.
He is very emotional and he used to be painfully shy- especially in large social situations. That is actually getting better the older he gets and has improved since preschool but he is fairly reserved. My son does like to cuddle, he loves hugs and kisses and he is great at puzzles and memorizing different species of sharks and dinosaurs, he also has a great imagination. After he has time to warm up to social situations he does do fairly well but he repeats a lot of what his friends say.
I am just not sure where to go from here- do I need to pursue a diagnoses for aspergers from our pediatrician or is there something else going on here? Is this normal behavior??
Thank you so much for your time.
He has a very hard time looking at people, even me, in the face when he is spoken to, especially when we try to discipline. My husband and I have tried for 2 years to get him to look at us when we address him but it is only on his terms. If he wants to speak to us then he will look.
He also gets extremely distracted and will completely zone out if the TV is on. It is nearly impossible to get his attention.
When he is excited about something he does flap his hands and can hardly get his words out, there is a lot of stuttering and talking loudly.
When he is seeing friends his age he doesn't start chatting with them at first he just make some sort of strange hand motion mimicking a scene from a movie, which leads me to one of the other concerning issue, he started speaking in sentences after he turned 3 but so much of talking (especially to himself) are phrases from movies. He will repeat them over and over during the day. After he has warmed up to his friends then he will start playing.
If we do something without TONS of warning- for example take him out of the bath tub- he goes crazy- there is no talking to him- its like he cant even hear. The tantrums are long and he is hyper focused in getting back to the tub so he can do it his way. He always is hitting during his tantrums but if I can catch him in time and warn him sometimes he can stop himself. We try to give him warning but sometimes I feel like he is trying to manipulate us by saying “ok mommy- I need 5 more minutes” over and over. If he has his way the bath would be 2 hours long! His tantrums are violent and terrible. He is completely out of control.
He is very focused on his sister behaving- he cannot handle her not following the rules, he gets so mad he starts to hurt her to make her listen- yet he has no trouble not listening to my husband and I. He is getting a little better at trying to talk to her nicely to get what he wants but there are still a lot of times when he resorts to violence.
He also gets very over stimulated-if we have had a busy day, I know the evenings are going to be bad and sometimes he gets adamant about turning of either TV or radio but that happens randomly.
He is very emotional and he used to be painfully shy- especially in large social situations. That is actually getting better the older he gets and has improved since preschool but he is fairly reserved. My son does like to cuddle, he loves hugs and kisses and he is great at puzzles and memorizing different species of sharks and dinosaurs, he also has a great imagination. After he has time to warm up to social situations he does do fairly well but he repeats a lot of what his friends say.
I am just not sure where to go from here- do I need to pursue a diagnoses for aspergers from our pediatrician or is there something else going on here? Is this normal behavior??
Thank you so much for your time.
Post Comment
Is your son in school? If not, your public school may have an autism itinerant or some other special educator who you could speak with.
Please remember, however when speaking with "experts" and/or professionals that you are this child's mother. If you are not satisfied with the answers you are getting, be persistent. If someone misses a piece that you think is significant, point it out. You know your son better than anyone else (your descriptive post is proof of that!). Don't let anyone make you feel as though they know him better than you do.
If you start pursuing therapies, be warned. There are several out there. My advice to you is try anything that makes sense to you. Be wary of therapists who tell you to stick with their methodology and not to try another. There is no way to predict how a child is going to respond to a particular therapeutic methodology. What may seem to work miracles for one child may not be effective with another. The only way to find out is to try.
Be patient. Be open-minded. But above all be and advocate for your child.