Any response is appreciated

[44_w_one]

Dear All -
I'm a first timer, but an old timer.  I'm 44, and am blessed with a beautiful 10 yr. old girl, who we had naturally.  I've had ~6 IUI's in 2007 and 1 IVF - 1/08, all unsuccessful.  Besides my age, dx unexplained.  This month I had another IUI because 3/4 follicles did not mature fast enough for the IVF.  During a normal AF cycle my bbs are sore, and I usually am very bloated.  2dpIUI, i had minor twinges in the abdomen/lower umbilicus area, and a couple of sharp pangs on the left side 2 or 3 days later. Today is 11dpIUI, and my bbs have been nonstop sore at the nipple area since day 2.  I also had a little show after I used the facilities (tmi).  Is this implantation?    I haven't felt like this before.  I feel fine otherwise, appetite, energy level.  Am I feeling pg signs?  I didn't feel a thing with my daughter.  We very much would love to blessed with another baby.  It's been 10 years.  Baby dust to you all.
44_w_one

[Shayne Plosker, MD]

Unfortunately, it is extremely unlikely that you will get pregnant with IVF at age 44. If you refer to www.cdc.gov/art/art2004, this provides IVF results in the US in 2004. Section 2, figure 12, indicates that the chances of getting pregnant with IVF at age 44 are only 7.4%, with only a 3.3% live birth rate, By far the best chances of getting pregnant at age 44 are by using a younger egg donor - using a donor chances each IVF try are in the 50% range.

[Jackson_Angel]

Hey ~ don't insult US! ~:-)~ I'm 44 young and have an 11 yr old daughter ~ in your same position ~ JUST found this site ~ HOPING I can get more info than the dribs/drabs I get at the IVF ~ Had one good follicle - used Ovidrel - then had my 2nd IUI this past Sunday ~ hoping it takes ~ had major "spotting" ~ don't remember the first IUI hurting this much ~ took longer than usual too ~ original Dr only out me on Clomid one cycle then had the IUI ~ ended up with major cysts - had to take a month off - then had the HSG (*OUCH*) ~ everything normal ~ "Doctor" keeps pushing doner eggs ~ basicaly don't want to settle for "Door #1" ~ so told him I wanted to keep trying ~ he missed the egg this last time ~ I called back and got another Doctor who caught it and she scheduled the IUI ~ needless to say I won't be seeing the other "Dr" again ~ are you having problems not getting the attention from the Doctor you think you should ~ after researching everything on the net ~ it's like you actually have to tell them what to do next unless you just want to settle for an egg donor..??.. ...sorry for being a PITA ~ a LITTLE irritated....

~~Also ~ have a massage scheduled for Thursday ~ I don't know if it would be ok or not ~ or should I wait...??..~I have a checkup Friday to check Ovulation status, etc....
I JUST had the second IUI this past Sunday ~ and I was on Follistim for this go around, but the doctor was saying it didnt have any effect on me and my producing eggs ~ the SAME DAY I went in for a blood test and ultrasound ~ he didn't even measure anything ~ just turned the machine off and I saw the egg ~ he seems to be a donor egg pusher..:-)..??..!!.....then I called the practice the next day and got in with a different doctor, and she agreed and measured and had me use the ovidrel Friday night then had the IUI Sunday ~ HOPING it takes....have had cramps pretty bad on & off, and feels like my pelvis is about to fall out at times while I'm walking ~ wish there was some way to tell if it took NOW instead of waiting....don't know if I should be doing anything like exercising at the gym (bike) or not ~

Have you ever had any problems with the IVF practices..??....I mean the practices practicing the IVF/IUI procedures.......I have been told I'm not a candidate for IVF due to my age..??..

I actually DID tell them I have been researching on the net and requested the injectibles ! THEY DIDN'T SUGGEST IT ~ they seem to be in more of an egg-donor business ~ and they DO advertise ALOT here in NJ ~.......maybe go to one that doesn't advertise as much..??..that's what I've been thinking ~ and told my husband... this is SO irritating and confusing ~

What meds are you on..??..are you always getting 3-4 follicles..??..My bbs aren't hurting that much yet ~ but its only been 2 days since....still getting twinges in left/right ovaries and feel like my uterus is falling out at times...

HOPING & PRAYING for another healthy happy beautiful baby ~ ASAP!!!....

...Baby dust to all....

[Jackson_Angel]

Your hit of the women on this site is horrible ~ and offending ~ there are plenty of women out there 44+ who have managed to become pregnant and carry the baby full-term ~ this is why I switched my Doctors to one with a nicer bedside manner.....and who doesn't push the egg doner babies initially but tries to HELP the women conceive their OWN ~ then AFTER MANY ATTEMPTS ~ suggest you possibly look at using a doner egg ~ not push the initial end-result financially beneficial to the service.............

[babyalive]

You have to understand the dr.'s job is to act based on medical research and data.  He was simply listing the data.  Every case is individual and 3%, means 3% of women are/do get pg at age 44.  Any one of us can be one of that 3%.  But, we do need to be informed about the research and be aware that we may also be one of the 97% who don't get pg.

[RunningL8]

I agree with baby alive.  Good REs are trying to help us have babies, not just procedures or even pregnancies.  Most REs will not do ivf with a woman's own eggs after age 43 because the success rate is very low.  And getting pregnant is only a small part of the battle; once pregnant, mid-40s women face a high rate of miscarriage.  (I say this has a woman who has had 3 mcs in 10 months.)  Like all doctors, REs look at medical statistics--not their feelings--when deciding on a course of treatment.  We older women come in saying we want to have a baby, and REs suggest donor eggs because that procedure has a high success rate.  It's not personal.

[RunningL8]

Just one more comment:  at most clinics, a donor egg ivf cycle costs about twice as much as a regular ivf cycle, yet the ivf success rate for a 44 year old woman using donor eggs is about 10-20 times higher than that of an ivf cycle in which she uses her own eggs (depending upon the clinic).  Also, the donors are heavily screened, so you are much more likely to have additional embryos left over for future ivf attempts.  There are many good reasons an older woman would want to try ivf with her own eggs, but cost effectiveness is not one of them.  (A year ago, I too felt upset with REs for "pushing" donor eggs, but now I see they are just trying to help me become a mother, which is what I want most of all. :)  

[40smama]

I'm pregnant (33w) w/the aid of donor eggs and am 44 - soon to be 45.  I concur w/running & babyalive - the doctor's recommendations aren't personal - they're just going by the stats.  When my 1st cycle was cancelled, I didn't hesitate to ask for donor eggs.  I just wanted to be a mommy!  And like running said, I didn't want to become pg just to end up miscarrying.  Sadly, Dr. Plosker's advice is right on target.

[pussycat617]

Regarding all above entries, I thought I'd throw in something positive to lift the dark cloud.  My nephew will turn two years old this month.  He's an IVF.  His beautiful mother, who used her own eggs, will turn 47 yrs. old right after his birthday.  You do the math.  He has a five year old brother, biologically and completely his brother, who was also an IVF.  No outside chromosomes unrelated to their family were used.  They have an older sibling who was conceived naturally.

My sister-in-law and her family were fortunate in that the IVF's took on the first try.  If there is any question as to whether donor eggs were used, well, they sure look exactly like my sister-in-law!

If that doesn't lift everyone's spirits, my friend's sister had her eighth baby naturally at 43 yrs.  Personally, I think there will be more to follow.

Hope everyone feels better.  An attitude of gratitude is half the battle.  I thought this thread could use something a little more upbeat.  Everyone I've known to have IVF (who is older) has used their own eggs and had healthy children with uncomplicated pregnancies.

Keep in mind that a doctor is usually the first to take the heat when something goes wrong.  All he can do is quote the stats.  The beauty of it is that the rest of us get to share news of miracles we know of to help lift others' spirits.  Blessings to all of you!!