Help me with nap time

[midlelle]

I have a five-year old who doesn't want to take a nap. He is in Pre-K and if he doesn't sleep he doesn't listen to the teacher and has outbursts. I have tried to, play videos (he stays up the entire time), take away things to the point where he just lays on his bed (he will lay there for hours and it doesn't seem to affect him not to watch TV or play), just let him rest, but then he is terrible at school, put him to bed earlier, but he just gets up earlier and is even more tired the next day. He has stood on the corner, been comforted and loved, and promised many things. None of this works. I hate to spank, but the last two days I have spanked him, he has thrown a fit and then fallen asleep. I hate this but he wakes up ready and happy and gets a good report from school. I have explained that he needs to nap every day, and he isn't being punished. This never works. This also happens at night when he goes to bed. He actually will be asleep (because I will stand over him and he will fall asleep) and he jerkes himself awake. He is very stubborn. I am at my wits end. Every time I send him to school without a nap he gets in trouble. What do I do?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

It is not realistic to try to force the issue with a child of five who has passed the stage when he will readily nap. You've learned from experience that he would do better in a morning-only program, and it would be sensible to arrange this if you can (I understand that this likely will not happen in the near future). Spanking him is not a good idea. Apart from the issue of whether spanking in general is a reasonable thing to do, your son does not deserve to be punished - he is not doing anything wrong by not napping. Focus instead on helping have some relatively quiet period, keeping himself bust with something prety sedentary (playing with small blocks, coloring, paying with clay).

[redneckmom]

I don't think your son needs to nap anymore.  My five year old hasn't napped for quite some time.  If a five year old is tired he will probably let you know in some way.  I wouldn't force him to take a nap.  Instead I would find out what is making him act up.  I doubt it has to do with napping.

[ticked]

as soon as a child starts to resists naps and you become annoyed, they are done with naps.  Once you take them out your child will become adjusted to not having one, and will fall asleep better.  i am not going to lie that i think my child doesnt need a nap at times because she is a great kid unless she is tired than she is terrible to deal with and cranky.  You have to just let it go. I had to at 2 yrs old, can you imagine that? He doesnt want a nap so let him be just put him on quiet time in his room for an hour and let him play quietly or read books instead. Trust me in time he will be fine without the nap and he will adjust.  My daughter took a month to adjust and she now goes to bed at 7:30-8pm and wakes up at 7am

[Izzi126]

I must agree with the rest of the moms.  I have a 6 year old and she hasn't napped for about 2 years now, maybe even longer.  Forcusing the child to sleep when they don't want to during the day is only going to cause your fustration.  At Pre-K, these teachers should know by experience that not all of the kids at that age nap.  Explaining that they must sit quietly and perhaps rewarding that behavior will bring you much further.  My child's Pre-K teacher would allow them a small stuff animal or a small notebook to play with quietly.  Believe me if the child is tired they will fall asleep naturally.  There comes a time when toddler become little kids and move into the next stage.  Sitting quietly may give him the rest he needs to listen to his teacher.  At age 5 you can calmly explain to the child what is going on and what needs to be done.  If they follow instructions each day and the end of the week they can get a reward.  I used reward charts a lot and it helped achieved the behavior I was looking for.  Good Luck

[Jen98]

My sons are 2 and 4 and they both dropped naps at around 12 months, around the time they both started walking. They were just to busy to sleep and they would fight nap time, until I just said the heck with it!! The initial 2 weeks or so when they had decided to stop napping was a little on the difficult side because they, didn't want to nap, but they were having a difficult time making it until bed time and were really cranky in the late evening. However, in no time at all they settled into an 8pm bedtime, and they wake up at 8am, and they are happy ALL day long.

I know my boys were a little young to stop napping but five years old and still napping?? I would think that it would be obvious that he was at the age that he no longer needs to nap. I mean how much longer did you think he would carry on napping for?

As for spanking him for it, its not like he is misbehaving, its more like what his body is telling him to do. I know how frustrating it can get dealing with a cranky whiney child, but I am pretty sure that once your son has some adjusting time ( don't force him to have a nap at this time) his body will get used to it and perhaps the outbursts will stop. I find there is always that 2 weeks adjusting period for everything. Although it may be hard for those two weeks, it always gets better.

[tafai]

I would think that he probably doesn't need his nap anymore?
In the country where I live, children go to kindergarten at age 4, the first year they can come in for half days if nescessary and from age 5 it's just off to school every day.
And as far as I know most 4yr olds and def. 5 year olds are fine with that, no naps during the day, maybe an earlier bedtime or a short nap right after school.

Of course it's different for each child, but I'm "afraid" your son is simply done napping..

take care,
Tafai