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Sexuality & Relationships (Expert Forum)
NO sex drive
This forum is for questions and support regarding relationship issues such as: Abstinence, Arousal Problems, Birth Control, Cohabitation, Commitment, Communication, Couples Counseling, Desire /Lack of Desire, Sexual Technique.
Doctor's Answer
by Janice M Epp, PhD, Jun 10, 2008 10:00PM
, Jun 10, 2008 10:00PM
To: limey
Dear Limey:
I’m assuming when you use the term “sex drive” that you’re referring to your interest in sex and/or your desire for sex.
If you’re not interested in sex, you might be going through a period when other things have a priority in your life. You’re a student, so this is understandable. Your head must be buzzing with all sorts of information you need to memorize, evaluate, etc. It’s no wonder you might lose interest. Your life is full right now, and since intellectual pursuits have priority, your body may be secondary.
If you’re interested in sex, but feel no desire to actually be sexual—whether with yourself or others—then perhaps you haven’t come across anything that turns you on at this point in your life. That’s understandable too. We often go through periods where our desires may take a break. Or maybe your tastes are changing. This might be a good time to investigate some new things that might turn you on. Try looking at some erotica for fantasy material and see if anything appeals to you.
And, of course, other factors can influence desire. You might also examine what else has been happening in your life that may have affected you. Are you content with yourself, with your life, with your relationships? Are there any family or work crises? And how’s your physical health? There are numerous medical conditions that can also contribute to lack of desire.
I’m wondering how you feel about this. Are you concerned, or would it be OK with you if your body/spirit were just telling you to take a break? Dr. J
I’m assuming when you use the term “sex drive” that you’re referring to your interest in sex and/or your desire for sex.
If you’re not interested in sex, you might be going through a period when other things have a priority in your life. You’re a student, so this is understandable. Your head must be buzzing with all sorts of information you need to memorize, evaluate, etc. It’s no wonder you might lose interest. Your life is full right now, and since intellectual pursuits have priority, your body may be secondary.
If you’re interested in sex, but feel no desire to actually be sexual—whether with yourself or others—then perhaps you haven’t come across anything that turns you on at this point in your life. That’s understandable too. We often go through periods where our desires may take a break. Or maybe your tastes are changing. This might be a good time to investigate some new things that might turn you on. Try looking at some erotica for fantasy material and see if anything appeals to you.
And, of course, other factors can influence desire. You might also examine what else has been happening in your life that may have affected you. Are you content with yourself, with your life, with your relationships? Are there any family or work crises? And how’s your physical health? There are numerous medical conditions that can also contribute to lack of desire.
I’m wondering how you feel about this. Are you concerned, or would it be OK with you if your body/spirit were just telling you to take a break? Dr. J
Have you started any new medications?
What's new in your life the last 2 months?
Are you otherwise physically healthy?
Also at 20, you're through the "growing up" stage...Physically that is. During the teen years your drive would be a lot stronger. Perhaps it's nothing more than just being a bit older.