I'm hearing things and they depress me

[ahunter4]

I have of yet only this week thought that my friends are talking behind my back but they are not. I trust them completely when im with them but by myself i believe that they hate me and make fun of me. This along with many girl related issues with roommates has made me completely depressed and I have been for most of my life unhappy but now im in college i have great things and great friends but I do not have friends outside of my dorm room because I don't like to leave. I'd rather stay at my dorm room all day unless someone offers alcohol ( which I drink to get drunk) or anything else. To top it off I am never  happy when im on weed and whenever I do it I got the worst trip of my life and I stopped for a while till yesterday because I had no sleep in three days and I needed to sleep so I had some. I stayed awake for hours but I was listening to my friends conversations and I hear my name said over and over and here all these dreaded comments about me and everything. Every time I think of it aIl i want to just slit my throat it was that bad. But for the past few days i hear all this like people talking behind my back and I feel like I'm going nuts. I was wondering am I crazy or is it words being put in my head because this all seems to real for words and what they said I could have never thought up. Please put my mind at ease and tell me. What the Hell Is WRONG WITH ME?

[blubell4921]

Well first calm down and be rational stop with the party life and see a doctor to get meds.  They will help calm the everyone hates me voices. I used to think that every time someone was in a group they were talking bad about me it's not the case it is you thinking the thoughts about yourself and transferring them in you mind odd I know but the mind is a powerful thing YOU ARE NOT CRAZY just depressed about something. Talk to your friends and get help meds are not terrible they could save your life but even if you don't take them you need to talk to someone go out of your dorm if not for friends than just for a walk to see the world around you.  Maybe your friends are scared for you if they cared then they should be it sounds like you are going down a scary path that doesn't have a good ending. Find a way to sleep get tylenol p.m but take them carefully they could have deadly side effects if taken more than directed dose.  Please don't do anything drastic you are okay I promise lay off the alcohol and drugs though.  

[ahunter4]

thanx for posting it finally i can calm the hell down