Mt grandson Memphis

[Marty1960]

My grandson is 4 years old & has been toilet trained since before he was 3, at least to urinate, he refuses to have a bowel movement on the toilet. He wears underpants & will just mess in them, I tell him he is a big boy & needs to use the potty but he won't. He is happy doing it in his pants. Sometimes it falls out & he will pick it up & put it in the toilet. I tell him I am going to have to put diapers back on him & he really does not want that, his parents & I are at our wits end, he will start school in August, any suggestions will be a help. Thank you Marty


This discussion is related to 4 year old refuses to have bowel movement in toilet.

[iamsympatico]

Toilet inserts, different toilet apparatus doesn't help this situation. I know the doctor had a response of taking the pull ups away and that would solve the challenge but I didn't think so and as proof it doesn't as the problem is deeper. One comment is seeking help but it is very tough to get.. Time seems to work things through on  other things we are hoping the same for this as we are in the same situation. We try to keep reinforce positive behavior. View books and video  and try to reduce anxiety when sitting on the toilet. In the meantime I spend every waking hour looking for new solutions and hope for the best.

[momtofourboys]

Chris who is 4 1/2 started to do the same thing and I got frustrated. at first everyone was telling me that he was being lazy but this sounds wacked but he was afraid of the toilet. I asked him why well there were two reasons.  first he saw me flush a big olde spider down the toilet and want it to crawl back up the toilet. and secondly his 3 older brothers were playing a joke on him and shut hte light off on him while he was pooping and that scared the poop out of him. I don't know why he would go pee in it but just poop maybe he fels he has no control over the spider and can't chase his brothers when they shut the lights off I don't know but it tool a VERY long time to reassure him of htat not happening again
good luck
michelle

[RockRose]

Hmm.  He's not afraid of flushing his poop,  so it isn't that.  

Is he afraid of falling in the toilet?  Has he fallen in before?  I wonder if you might want to put one of those apparatus on one of the toilets for "his" toilet that makes the opening narrower and he won't feel like he's falllng in.