This patient support community is for discussions relating to relationships, abstinence, arousal problems, birth control, cohabitation, commitment, communication, couples counseling, desire, sexual technique, and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).
Assuming he is a "deadbeat, pond scum, maggot or Satan incarnate", (and it all sounds pretty true by the way!) why would you want any kind of communication with him at all? You appear to be doing everything right for your children without his help, so why torture yourself with having to deal with him for one more moment of your life? No doubt you already know what a court battle can do to your life - no matter how justified the action. Are you ready to take that on just to get some of his money? Are you ready to put you children on the witness stand and further traumatize them? You're the only person who can answer those questions. You will never force him to love your child, because he doesn't seem to be capable of loving anyone other than himself.