play with children younger than themselves

[isthiscp]

I find this interesting but why is it that kids with asd's seem to play with kids younger than themselves? This seems to be common in a lot of what I have read in posts etc. Also my brother has aspergers and olny ever could really get involved with younger kids. Any one have any insight into this? My son goes to an after school club and although he is nearly 9 he has made friends with a 4 year old(there are other 9 year olds but he has no interest in them)

[mjthewriterdad]

I s'pose it makes sense to me for a child to want to play with those  closer to his "social age" rather than his "chronological age"

[Sally44]

I have also found that some children with ASDs prefer to 'play/communicate' with adults.  Again this can be down to the fact that an adult has alot more patience to listen to the child and try and figure out what they are trying to say/do.  When there are problems with speech/social communication any child with an ASD will find themselves always being the one 'out of it', or 'not understanding' or 'losing control of the play' or 'losing the toy' etc.  As they are unable/find it difficult to relate/communicate with their peers it is logical for them to either play with younger children or older adults.

[AspClown]

I hesitate to use the phrase "social age."  While there may be some merit to thinking of an aspie child as socially immature, it is more accurate to say that the aspie child is socially inept or unskilled.  The functional deficit would be there even if the child is social mature.

Based on my own experience, asperger's adults and children have difficulty in settings that require social navigation.  The social cues that establish peer group heirarchy and interactions are too subtle, come too fast and are too complex for many aspies to follow.

An aspie is more comfortable (anxieties aside) when social interactions are characterized by a clear roles or structure.  One-on-one adult-child interactions seldom involve social posturing and the roles and expectations are often clearly defined allowing an aspie to communicate more comfortably with an adult than a group of peers.  The same goes for one-on-one interactions with a younger child who accepts the aspie's role as the older, more knowledgeable child.