30mo old with Social Anxiety

[EarlyInterventionist]

I'm an early interventionist for a 30 month oldl child with what appears to have a severe social phobia. He's a totally different child alone or in an environment which he's familiar and comfortable in vs. when he's with a group of children, in a public place or even with several children he's familiar with. When with other children or in a new place, the child screams and cries excessively even when mom is right next to him and is not preparing to leave. During his tantruming, he does pay close attention to what's going on around him. In addition, he has a severe delay present in his expressive and receptive communication. He's been late on most developmental milestones and has some 'soft,' and not entirely convincing, autistic behaviors.  

I'm looking for some strategies and ideas to help ease his extreme social anxiety. Will exposure to situations that trigger this extreme reaction help to modify and reduce the behavior? Any ideas?
When is it appropriate for the family to seek appointment with a child psychologist?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

This child is facing sufficient challenges with his development without pushing the matter of social engagement. My advice is to relax any pressure in this regard and let him proceed very slowly, with social interaction (as much as is feasible) limited to one or two peers rather than large groups. With his developmental status delayed, it will have a similar impact on his social development. While he may be two and one-half, he's not at that stage socially.