Hate My life

[Nc17]

Hey guys, i hope this hasnt happened to anyone. Ever since i was a lil girl i have been scared of balloons, thunder, scary movies. while growing up i would remove myself from places that may have any of the mentioned above. About a year and a half ago, i dont know what came over me but i started to have really bad panic attacks. My "balloon-phobia" went away, however, thunder and i dont get along. I used to see a therapist who said i have PTSD and OCD from checking the weather 39048324059 times an hour. It has gotten so severe that i cant leave my house, lock myself in the closet, blast music in my ear.. cry myself to the point i want to hurt myself. I've tried many doctors and therapist, but they seem to be taking it slow getting no where. i am 22 about to graduate from college and want to start my carreer but this is truly stopping me. IDK what to do with myself anymore.... i wake up constantly to the sound of cars passing by, it even got to the point that i can tell you what type of vehicle passed by just by the noise it made, the wheel noise.... and etc.. i can even hear airplanes when no one cant. I saw an ear specialist who told me i was pretty much growing deaf, which i do have trouble hearing people but once i know its going to thunder my hearing multiplies.... Someone please help i cant keep living like this

[Nc17]

i forgot to mention... my friends call me from whereever  they are to let me know its thundering or its about to... and when someone scares me.. i pass out

[NCR1]

Wow, what an amazing story, I dont know what to say to that, I feel for you, i guess you just need to remember no one has ever been hurt by thunder before. and i think you should tell your friends not to tell you so you dont start hyperventilating before it.

I wish you all the best and should you ever need to talk feel free to message me or this forum.

I suffer sever anxiety and depresson but definitley not in that form.

[sunset555]

Hi NC,

Wow, that is quite a lot you have going on there!!!

You say about a year and a half ago, you started to get panic attacks again, and that you "Clearly" cannot tolerate "Thunder" What I must ask you is what was going on in your life around then that just out of the blue made you feel so insecure about yourself???? this is just purely an analysing question that maybe you could personally ask yourself just to get back to the "root" of the problem surrounding all of this panic and fear!!

You say that you saw a therapist but did not work out too good for you, how about "changing" your therapist to one who specializes in anxiety itself, that would be a good start for you. You are so young 22, and have such a lot ahead of you, but what is making you feel so overwhelmed?? (that is just another analysing question you may want to ask yourself).

You say that you actually "hear" the thunder when it's on it's way! are you unsubconsiously "Waiting" to hear it???? Why not try the following; it may work for you then again it may not, just go with me here for a moment.

1) Next time you hear "thunder" whether it's on it's way or actually there with you - try and embrace it, and even befriend it!!!

2) Then when you have done this, cuddle up on the couch or your bed and get a nice cosy blanket, wrap it around you and get a nice hot drink, and think to yourself how cosy and "Secure" you feel with the "thunder" outside and with you inside, it cannot "HARM" you, it is only merely a noise, two silly clouds banging together!!

What you have actually done here is - you have "Allowed" the actuall thunder to take over you and to scare you, your hearing has become so sensitised that you even listen out for vehicles passing by your house, and focus in on them far too much.

Get yourself some nice soft backround music, put your earplugs in and read a book or even meditate whilst the soft music is playing in the backround and see where that takes you.

You have come to the right forum, where people will do their utmost best to help you along the way.

Take care,

Sunset

[lilyput]

you have a phobia, dear. i know it feels like it, but it's not the end of the world. however, it does sound like it's gotten pretty strong with you...it's probably a phobia, OCD, and an anxiety disorder combined at this point.

cognitive behavioral therapy would do wonders for you....especially the behavioral technique known as flooding. just make sure you find a therapist who has been using this technique for a LONG TIME. also, PET or prolonged exposure therapy might be a good course of action for you. it's pretty quick - 10 to 12 sessions and usually covered by insurance companies.

hang in there...i know it's hard, but you have your entire life ahead of you. there's no reason you won't be able to enjoy it without fear.

good luck. sending positive vibes your way.

lily

[nursegirl6572]

You are spamming the board with your duplicate post.