SLEEPING

[GG1412]

Our daughter is three years old.  She cannot put herself to sleep at night.  We read five or so books every night, we talk about the day and the day to come, and then we sit with her for a few minutes.  When we try to leave she will begin crying uncontrollably and screaming.  This has been going on for most of her life, which means that we either end sleeping with her until she falls asleep or in some cases we sleep with her.  We recently have put up a gate with the hope that she will "cry it out."  That didn't work, as she surprised us by climbing over the gate.  So we're left scratching our heads.  What should we do?

[treazzure007]

Uh-oh.  first of all, you missed the gate stage a few years back.  No 3 year old is deterred by a gate.  secondly, if you hadnt already trained her to fall asleep on her own, it wasnt necessarily supposed to ever happen out of the blue.  

There are many suggested methods on helping a child learn to fall sleep on their own, in their own beds.  One of the methods suggested is to first have a bedtime routine to enable them to know what to expect next.  
Then you kiss them goodnight and just let them cry it out if they must, then go in the reassure them you're nearby, and then let them cry it out some more.  They eventually see that you wont give in, but you are nearby and you still care.  They are expected to cry less and less each night until they eventually dont cry at all.  I suggest this particular method because it worked for both of my children-6yrs and 6 mos.  

Trust me, it is worth the screaming when in a week, you can read her a bedtime story, put her into bed, and have sweet peace from then on.  Good luck

[treazzure007]

I wanted to add that because she is starting out a little older, the gate wont work.  You may have to close her door.  Just be ready for it to take a little bit more determination from your side as well as time for this to work with an older child.