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New realtionship..and a baby on the way??!!
by karie74, May 10, 2008 10:02AM
Ok,
So, I am pregant...exactly 6 weeks and well my boyfriend and I will be hitting our4 month anniversary this month...I'm worried about everything. He is not EXCITED about the baby...because the realtionship is fairly new. But, our realtionship moved fast from the start...We fell pretty quick, after the first month he moved in with me ..out of need more then want. He was just going to stay with me till he found a place of his own, then we were going to continue the realtionship with him having his place and me having my own place......IT was a good plan. I have a small apartment for two of us...its croweded but we make it work for right now. We love each other so we deal with each others ****..lol. BUT, now ....with the baby coming..things have changed drastically in two weeks. I can tell he is getting distant...He is away on business right now and everytime we seem to talk...it ends up in a arguement. He left the day after I found out I was pregnant. He'll be back this week. He seems very quick tempered and I don't know if it's just me because of my hormones...or it's him. He tells me he loves me and we'll make it work. He is not much for words, my boyfriend. He shows me things in his actions...if we get into a fight and I hang up, he'll always call me back and apologize even thou i'm the one that started it. He includes me in all his decsions...even if it doesn't pertain to me at all. He asked me if it was ok that he went on this trip...and if i had said no, he wouldn't have went...I mean....I can tell he loves me...I just am scared that this baby is going to be the end of our realtionship. IT was an accident...but for me...He knew I have always wanted a baby...and he knows how happy it's making me...he on the other hand could have waited a year of two. I DO not want to get married, and i think he was relieved when I told him that. I want to get married eventually, but for the right reasons..not the wrong reasons. I have seen way to many women get married because of pregnancy..I don't want that.
He's still brings up that fact that he wanted to get his own place for a while...which..makes me very upset...because now...I don't want to be alone with this baby growing inside me...before i was pregnant I was happy to have him looking for a place..so we could take things at a normal pace...and I could have my space back...but now....I'm just so emotional about eveyrthing...
ANyone have a similiar situation?? any advice will be helpful!!
So, I am pregant...exactly 6 weeks and well my boyfriend and I will be hitting our4 month anniversary this month...I'm worried about everything. He is not EXCITED about the baby...because the realtionship is fairly new. But, our realtionship moved fast from the start...We fell pretty quick, after the first month he moved in with me ..out of need more then want. He was just going to stay with me till he found a place of his own, then we were going to continue the realtionship with him having his place and me having my own place......IT was a good plan. I have a small apartment for two of us...its croweded but we make it work for right now. We love each other so we deal with each others ****..lol. BUT, now ....with the baby coming..things have changed drastically in two weeks. I can tell he is getting distant...He is away on business right now and everytime we seem to talk...it ends up in a arguement. He left the day after I found out I was pregnant. He'll be back this week. He seems very quick tempered and I don't know if it's just me because of my hormones...or it's him. He tells me he loves me and we'll make it work. He is not much for words, my boyfriend. He shows me things in his actions...if we get into a fight and I hang up, he'll always call me back and apologize even thou i'm the one that started it. He includes me in all his decsions...even if it doesn't pertain to me at all. He asked me if it was ok that he went on this trip...and if i had said no, he wouldn't have went...I mean....I can tell he loves me...I just am scared that this baby is going to be the end of our realtionship. IT was an accident...but for me...He knew I have always wanted a baby...and he knows how happy it's making me...he on the other hand could have waited a year of two. I DO not want to get married, and i think he was relieved when I told him that. I want to get married eventually, but for the right reasons..not the wrong reasons. I have seen way to many women get married because of pregnancy..I don't want that.
He's still brings up that fact that he wanted to get his own place for a while...which..makes me very upset...because now...I don't want to be alone with this baby growing inside me...before i was pregnant I was happy to have him looking for a place..so we could take things at a normal pace...and I could have my space back...but now....I'm just so emotional about eveyrthing...
ANyone have a similiar situation?? any advice will be helpful!!
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Thank you for you response...
Yeah, our realtionship moved fairly fast...which has never happened to me before. But, we just had a connection. I'm thinking him moving into his own place might very well be a good plan, the only problem with that is finacially we won't be able to save money. And, we need to for the baby....We spoke last night about things...and he does feel trapped, and I told him to do what he has to do, I don't want him in my life if he feels obligated!! He reassured me that things will be ok, it's just going to take some getting used to. He wants to be happy about this baby coming into the world, he doesn't want to feel like it's a "problem"..So, he said it's just something he has to come to terms with on his own and as long as I don't pressure him he'll be ok with it. He told me that he loved me and is worried about me...and wants me to be happy. We will talk about where were going to live a little down the line...He may have to go away on business again about a week after he gets back, and that might very well be the best thing for us right now..He';s making good money and it gives us time apart...to see what we both want. I do know i don't want my child growing up without his father in his life....and I never saw myself as a single mom, but if that is what I need to do ..i'll do it...it's not about me or him anymore..it's bout this miracle growing inside me....
Thank you for your advice...
:)