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Alcoholic, Living with an Community
This patient support community is for loved ones of people who drink and are trying to quit for discussions relating to abuse, behavioral issues, caring for yourself, counseling, divorce and separation, enabling, guilt, and when to get medical help.
Help me help him!
by myxheroxzero, May 21, 2008 11:05PM
My roommate is an alcoholic. he seems unable to go a day without drinking as soon as he gets home from work, and gets irritable and somewhat hostile if he does not have alcohol on hand. He is very stubborn and somewhat immature about the subject often saying things to the extent that he doesn't care what we think or its not our business, and gets extremely defensive or storms off (often times to the bar). I care about him very much but its to
the point that he cares more about drinking than anything else and could easily sacrifice our friendship as well as kick me out if I were to call an intervention. I know that he will not agree to getting help and would refuse treatment because in his mind he doesn't have a problem .
What can I do!? I do not want to lose our friendship, I want desperately for him to get help, but I know he will respond negatively to any attempts to help because he has in the past.
I know he can't be forced into getting help unless it is court ordered, but for that to happen, he would have to get arrested, and I couldn't live with myself if God forbid he gets into an accident and hurts himself or someone else.
I do not want it to get to that point
please help!
-W
the point that he cares more about drinking than anything else and could easily sacrifice our friendship as well as kick me out if I were to call an intervention. I know that he will not agree to getting help and would refuse treatment because in his mind he doesn't have a problem .
What can I do!? I do not want to lose our friendship, I want desperately for him to get help, but I know he will respond negatively to any attempts to help because he has in the past.
I know he can't be forced into getting help unless it is court ordered, but for that to happen, he would have to get arrested, and I couldn't live with myself if God forbid he gets into an accident and hurts himself or someone else.
I do not want it to get to that point
please help!
-W
Post Comment
If you care, do the intervention (get a professional to facilitate for best result). And then, remove yourself from the situation. He will just drain you. And you are TOTALLY POWERLESS to get him to stop drinking.
And, yes, I agree. It would be awful if he hurt himself. But it would be TRAGIC if he killed someone else. I have known people that have called the police when the drunk person got behind the wheel, they got arrested, and were forced in to treatment. Many times, this gets a person in to recovery. It doesn't matter how they get there, as long as they get there. This may be the best thing you ever do for him. Only you can decide how you want to go on this. But if he kills someone - will you have any culpability if you know he went out drunk and got behind the wheel?
Some things to think about. Good luck.