Depression following miscarriage

[adgal]

Hi all,

I just want to say I am so excited to see this forum.  I had written medhelp asking for it, and its great to see it come to life.  I have experienced 3 m/c since January of this year.  This first ended in an emergency d&c on Feb3, the second was a chemical in March, then a third which also ended in a D&C just 4 weeks ago at 8 weeks pregnant.  I need your advice.  I have been away for a few weeks as I am normally a member of pregnancy 35+.  Following this last m/c I thought I was doing extremely well, and was for the first bit.  I then literally crashed 2 weeks ago.  I went into a very deep depression, and am struggling with this in a really big way.  The logical part of me knows a lot of this is hormonal, and combined with the emotional side of things, well its been tough, and I am trying to allow myself the time I need to heal.  My dilema is this...I knew I needed to seek help, it was that bad.  The dr. wants to put me on meds for a short time to help me through.  He says this is part hormonal, and the rest is situational.  He likens it to a post partum type thing, and seeings how I have never been depressed in my life, it should be short term.  I am now 39, and will be 40 in January.  At this point it is impossible for me to deliver prior to 40, so I am hesitant to take any meds for the depression, as there is no way I would try to conceive again while on anything, and I want to ttc again as soon as possible.  I know lots of women do take anti depressents while pregnant, but with my history, I just don't want to take the chance.  What do you guys think?  I am thinking short term therapy might be a better answer for me.  Has anyone else gone through this?  How long did the depression last?  Thanks so much for all your advice, its appreciated.  

[Keyan]

I am so sorry you have gone thru this. I am really upset just for 1 m/c, can't imagine going thru this 3 times in a row. I would be depress too. Everyone is differtent....when I m/c, I did cry, but continue on, everything happend so fast...but then like 2 weeks later I was crying all day, I mean literally all day, but I decide to leave it in GODs hand and since then I've been sad, some days more than others, I know I will never get over the loss, but hopefully time will heal bits of my heart.  I am about to turn 30 I am already worry about age, so I do understand that too, although If I were you, I would seek prof help and  try to get better soon, In the mean time wouldn't ttc so to give my body time to heal. (Hey! what does 3 or 6 months difference make, I know it seems ALOT of time to us in ttc dilema..although it is really not that long....but what if this is what you need so that in 15 months from now you have a beautiful baby in your arms)  Hopefully your body just needs some time to "rest" and heal so that it can hold a baby to term. If your ever need to talk, I'll be here for you. I am sending you a BIG/Strong  Hug!

PS... Thanks for asking for this forum

[Sharon2714]

i suffered major depression for many years and delivered 3 healthy babies after miscarriage ... all my babies were PPROM with the earliest at 32 weeks and she is going to college now .. depression takes a toll on the body in ways that could be dangerous to u and ur child ...talk to a good liscensed psychologist with a PHD ... if they feel ur situation needs meds ... even for a short term ... he will refer u to someone to prescribe them ... trust them and be honest about your goals on becoming a mom ... i am hoping they will surprise you  ... if u cant bond with ur psychologist find a new one ... nothing is ever permanent

holding u in prayer
sharon

[mommato4]

It is a really tough thing to go through. And know you are not alone. I can't say it will go away but it does get better. I have my days.  I am taking one day at a time. I am not planning my future.. I have put it in Gods hands. It will come if its meant to be. I know you may want a quick fix but there is none. Meds  are not always the answer. In this case i think time will heal your pain. Not take it away but take the sting away. Hope you the best !

[Latrice414]

Depression is an illness that causes a person to feel sad and hopless much of the time.  It is different from normal feelings of sadness, grief or low energy.  You can have deprssion one time or many times.  causes of depression, major events that create stress, such as child birth or death in family, illness, drinking etc.

One day im ok, the next day im crying in the middle of cooking.  At other times i just want to roll over and dont wake up until i feel better.  I actually thought about seeking professional help because i feel i have no control over the situation.  There are a lot of ways to handle the situation, medication, prayer, talk your plans over with you ob and pcf to see what is BEST for your situation.  I had d n c june 17th and me and my fiance are not gona try no time soon, or should i say, we are not gona plan to get preggo, if it happens it happens, even though i want to fill this void i have inside me right now.  I wish everyone the best and thank god for this forum.