OT and extremely upset

[kazwel]

Ladies, i really dont know what to do.. I was just suspended from work for a day without pay because i supposidly am causing a "hostile work environment"  i was written up for
1. slamming my phone down.  
2. having a private conversation in my OWN OFFICE with one of my salesmen I asked him to change the outgoing message on his cell phone because it said to call me if they had any questions.  So i asked him to change it because i keep getting innundated with calls from people who think i'm your *****.  i was not calling anyone a *****

3.  having a private converstation on my cell phone  and saying.. why doesnt she just drop dead (granted i know thats not nice but i did say it)

My boss called me into HR and they ambushed me!!!   I sit at my desk all day and work my arse off..

I saved that company over a quarter of a million dollars last year alone in lost revenue.  I have only taken 1 day off in the last 2 years where i havent had to be "available" by cell and that was when we buried my Nana!!

I am just completely Flabergasted.  I dont know what to do.. My blood pressure is through the roof right now and my head is pounding and i feel sick to my stomach,
Are they mad at me because i'm going to be going on maternity leave??  Are the looking for a reason to fire me??  My boss came out and asked me point blank if i was happy in my position!!!

what the heck

[aabarnett]

First of all try to calm down.  Stressing out is not good for you or the baby.  Second, did they cive you a chance to explain the situation(s)?  Try to step back and look at it from their point of view... They have all these reports that you did this that and the other, which are not a huge deal by themselves but when all added up make them question what is going on.  Okay remember that they are looking at is as one big issue, not as individual things that all just added up.  They are probably seeing you as an angry and possiably volitile woman who is probably going through some major hormonal changes right now and they just don't know what to do.  So, they have all these reports which they have to address so they call you in (and are probably flabergasted that it all happened in the first place because it's probably unusual behavior for you) and give you a list of everything they have been complained to about.  Then they are probably all men (no offence) so they don't really understand the hormonal thing at all and don't know that you were probably just letting off little amounts of steam during each incident.  I would suggest that you have your day off and do something that makes you happy.  Then when you go back in make an appointment with your boss so you can sit down and explain (unemotionally) what happened and maybe even write it all down so that your version of the event(s) can go in your personnel file.  Also assure your boss that you like your job (assuming that you do) and that you won't be cursing (even if you really want to sometimes because let's face it, sometimes our coworkers deserve it), and that you will make an effort to replace the phone more gently (they actually got mad about that... what a joke).  Tell your boss that you feel like you are an asset to the company and that you feel like you were ambushed and that the suspension was unfair.  Then assure him that you are going back to do your job in the best way you know how.  You really should address this with your boss because he can't read your mind.  He can only go off the information that he is given.  Okay well good luck and let me know how it goes.

[sweetangel7]

Do you have a contract or a union?  Are they able to suspend you?  I take it you are more upset about the suspension rather than the day without pay?  Is there any precedent as to not being ambushed behind closed doors and having counsel/arbitrator/impartial witness available?  Sorry to hear about this crappy way your day went.  Unfortunately, not many workplaces remember how great you are when something they don't like happens!  Hang in there!

[sweetangel7]

aabarnett gave you some great advice too!

[aabarnett]

Oh by the way... I almost hate to say this but my advice earlier comes from the fact that we have a family owned business that has been passed down through four generations so far.  So, it is probably easier to see it from the employer's view point for me.  If you have a fair boss, he or she will listen to you.  That is part of their job.  Trust me, I know :)  I have also been the employee in that same business (before I took over for my dad), so I do have an idea of how that side feels too.  But it would probably be a good idea to make up a signed report which states (as unemotionally as possiable) what you were accused of and why, also your side of the story.  Put in as much info as possiable like dates, names, places, etc. and then ask that this report be placed in your personnel file and attached to your suspension paperwork.  This will look better for any future reviews for a promotion, or just an employee review.  At least your side of the story will be there too, not just the accuzations.  Hey you never know, your employer might agree and do something to compensate you (although I wouldn't hold my breath).  Even if they drop the suspension, insist that the report you make is placed in the file.  This can only cover your butt.

[kazwel]

Hi,
Thank you both for your advice.   I have calmed down alot and my headache has started to subside.

I know who reported me.  The receptionist in my office.  She is relativly new and she is not fitting in very well with the flow of things.  

I basicly work by myself on a daily basis.  My job is very stressfull and i report directly to the CFO on a bi weekly basis (and that's if he remembers, they basicly leave me alone so i can do my job).  Today was the first time i have seen him in almost 3 weeks. we usually communicate via e'mail.

My average call volume is 80-120 calls a week and most of them are from angry customers or people who are canceling our services for some reason or another. And that is only one of the many hats that i wear.

When i told my Boss i was pregnant the first words out of his mouth were,   Oh, well we will see how we can fix this, than he said.. are you planning on coming back??  
Since then he has given me a hard time on every little thing.. Double checking and questioning the weekly reports i e'mail him (thankfully they are most part correct).


Yes, i slam my phone on a weekly basis.   that is nothing new since i started in this position almost 3 yrs ago.  I get my arse chewed out on a daily basis by clients who are not happy with something or other or are upset with the timetable for contract completion.
Both of the other "complaints"  were in my private office and the door was partially closed.  and i'm sorry but it think the they are totally baseless.

i was so upset at the time i just signed the letter so i could get out of HRs office without bursting into tears.

The woman who reported me is  gay and she is suing the last company she worked for  sexual discrimination. She has proudly told everyone in our office about it and how she cant wait untill the case is settled so she can go shopping.  

I dont know if it's a combination of me being pregnant and worried about being sued  I really dont know.  
I just know i am being treated very unfairly.









  

[evthing4reason]

I agree with writing down that you disagree with the suspension and why and have it atached to your file

[mami1323]

This sickens me how when a woman gets pregnant all of a sudden things start to change in the workplace.  It happened to me also.  Once I got pregnant, I was being picked at for little things that I would've never been picked at before.  Plus, if you were a male doing these things I highly gaurantee you they wouldn't be a big deal.  I suggest like one of the posters said to write a letter arguing their allegations.  Have that go in your personnel file.  Also, put in that letter that you feel that the suspension was unjust and you feel that you are being unfairly targeted because of your pregnancy.  I bet you after that they won't mistreat you anymore for fear that you will go after them for discrimination.  Just my advice.

[Linzola1]

I have never had to deal with anything like thais but I want to wish you all the best of Luck and I hope all works out for you.....

[kazwel]

Thank you all for your advice and help,  It really has helped make me feel better about the whole thing.  I just want you all to know how much i appreciate the support.

I am going to compose a letter to my boss arguing the accusations. and i am going to have it put in my file.  

I feel like i have lost though,   I have been on the fence about going back to work full time after my daughter is born,  I quess now i wont be going back.  I really dont know if i can stay in that kind of evironment untill she is born either,   I have a lot of thinking to do.
I am really sad because i do love what i do.  

My DF and i have to sit down and figure it out.  Thankfully he is very supportive and said whatever i feel i need to do he will support me.

I just dont know.   We need the insurance and the cobra payments are very expensive.  
I really just dont know.

If i do give my notice and leave then they have won.  Maybe i will just stick it out and make them fire me...  At least then i could collect unemployment while on maternity leave.

I really am just very confused about all of it and what to do

[JoyRenee]

Let me understand something---she's going to sue you because she's gay? Or was that with a previous employer?

When I told my employer that I was pregnant, a few weeks later she asked me to quit. She said, and I quote, "You're not happy here and you're just going to quit later anyway." At the time I didn't realize that what she did was NOT right and I was just so angry that I left. Now I wish I had fought or something. OH WELL!!!

But you seem to really enjoy your job. All you can do is communicate with the "powers that be" in your company. I wish you the best of luck!!!

[martikadragoon]

Unfortunately, if they're giving a "not so good" reason for writing you up.. or trumping up the citations, and really want you gone for being pregnant. Then there's not much you can do other than maybe try to better your behaviour?

Employers can be MAJOR jerks regarding pregnancy. I'm just blessed w/the job I got when I first got pregnant. They've got a rep for being really hard*ssed about missing days but have been VERY, VERY accommodating w/me being pregnant and missing time here and there. They stick to federal law.

If you continue to be harrassed by your work, speak to your HR department about how things have gotten tougher since getting pregnant and your boss giving you a hard time.

You need to write down EVERY incident that happens for records sake. And if your HR blows you off, you need to go to your local Labor Board.

[kazwel]

Well i'm getting ready to leave for work,  I am very nervous and I've already had one minor panic attack,  This cant be healthy but i'm not going to let them win.

First thing this morning i am going to request a copy of the repremand that i signed.  

Lookin back now i quess i should of actually read it before i just signed it but I was
very upset and just wanted to get out of there.

I am not a vindictive person,  Even though i KNOW who filed the complaint about me, i am going to request that my accuser is named.  Why should she be protected and i think that other people in the office should know what she is really about.

I'm just going to go to work and try not to cause a "Hostile work enviroment"  LOL  at least i can laugh at it a little bit now

But on a totally different note.  I had so much fun on my unsheduled day off!!  my DS and i spend the day by the pool with my Sister and Nephews.  So at least i have a good tan!!!

I really appreciate you all being there for me.  You guys really are the best
:)
Kazwel

[mami1323]

If you have to quit I think you can get Children's healthplus.  Since you are unemployed they take into account the one salary in the household.  So they will only look at your df's salary.  Does he have health insurance that he can put the baby under?  I think perhaps you can look into medicaid for yourself.  You can't have this effect your pregnancy.  You and that baby are more important than that stupid job.  There are other jobs out there but this pregnancy is special.  Hang in there!!!