6 year old with soiling accidents

[kindermom29]

My very bright, sensitive, six year old son has "occasional" accidents (stool) perhaps about once a month. These have always been when he is highly absorbed on the computer or some other activity where he "gets lost" so to speak and it seemed to just happen. Today for the first time he had an accident at day camp while out hiking. He says he didn't realize he had to go until after it happened. I should also say that he is somewhat constipated as a rule, usually having large BM's about every three days and I have seen him trying to delay going on ocasion or deny he has to go when clearly he needs to. He waits until the last minute.  We have tried every positive thing we can think of to help him with this but today i do admit I had a very serious talk with him about it telling him it was no longer acceptable etc.. etc.. Frankly I was concerned that he would be thrown out of camp (or school) if it had been in the fall and if it becomes an ongoing problem there. He is the type of kid who needs reminders to blow his nose, wash his hands, etc.. I am at a loss. My husband feels I am overreacting   Any advice?  Thanks

[Trialanderror]

My son is the same age as yours and had some relapse in toilet training a few yeasr ago. I thought the toilet subject would never come up again but guess what? He had an accident at camp as well and two incidents last month when he soiled his underwear just a bit before he could finally do a BM. Nice topic, isn`t it?
Anyway, from my previous experience my son has a hard time to judge when it is really urgent to go, even when he is not preoccupied in play. The BMs do take him by surprise. I used to think he was just pulling my leg by claiming he didn`t know when to go but he is trying hard to succeed and even wants to give me 2 dollars of his hard-earned money for every accident he might have.
I noticed that he has been drinking a lot less than ever for the past six months and had also developed a liking for cheese which lead to some constipation. The result was encopresis: He was trying to hold in the BMs for fear of pain because of constipation but let off "some matter" that gathers around the hard BM when he thought he was "just farting". Sorry to be so graphic but that`s what encopresis is about... I have quickly spiced up his diet with more water, prune juice, broccoli, a lot less cheese and lots of fibre in his yoghurt. Since I know it is not a psychological cause, I just remind him to listen to his belly before he goes out to camp and decide if he shoudl go to the washroom first. I too am anxious that he may get kicled out of camp next time but I will deal with it when it happens without making him feel bad.
Good luck, I just wanted to let you know that you`re not alone.