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Human Papillomavirus (HPV) Community
This forum is an un-mediated, patient-to-patient forum for questions and support regarding HPV issues such as: genital warts, causes, diagnosis, cervical cancer, HPV in men, PAP tests, treatment, telling your spouse or partner
Must save my marriage
by Dolphin08, Jul 14, 2008 10:54PM
Scared as hell my marriage will end, need your help:
1. I have a married lover who has just contracted Chondyloma. We have had oral sex and genital rubbing. I am her first extramarital liaison.
2. Three weeks previous to our first contact, I performed oral sex on a man (who did ejaculate). Nothing else.
3 In the previous five years I have had 2 extramarital affairs.
4. I've never had overt symptoms of HPV, but I will go for HPV testing/consultation.
5. My concern: I will not get a conclusive result of HPV in me (I understand that this is not possible). And I will be in a position where, as the responsible thing to do, I will be forced to tell my wife she should check herself.
Forgive me for what I will now ask: Since I very much want to save my marriage, which would be over if I confessed to infidelity, is there a statement I can make to my wife that is medically viable and says, to the effect, that I have discovered that I may have transfered something to her that has been in me for more than 16 years, i.e., before we were married, and that she should check herself? If so, I swear to God this will mark the beginning of a faithful relationship, because I have been scared into learning a lesson for fear of losing someone so wonderful as my wife. Please help me here? Thank you in advance.
1. I have a married lover who has just contracted Chondyloma. We have had oral sex and genital rubbing. I am her first extramarital liaison.
2. Three weeks previous to our first contact, I performed oral sex on a man (who did ejaculate). Nothing else.
3 In the previous five years I have had 2 extramarital affairs.
4. I've never had overt symptoms of HPV, but I will go for HPV testing/consultation.
5. My concern: I will not get a conclusive result of HPV in me (I understand that this is not possible). And I will be in a position where, as the responsible thing to do, I will be forced to tell my wife she should check herself.
Forgive me for what I will now ask: Since I very much want to save my marriage, which would be over if I confessed to infidelity, is there a statement I can make to my wife that is medically viable and says, to the effect, that I have discovered that I may have transfered something to her that has been in me for more than 16 years, i.e., before we were married, and that she should check herself? If so, I swear to God this will mark the beginning of a faithful relationship, because I have been scared into learning a lesson for fear of losing someone so wonderful as my wife. Please help me here? Thank you in advance.
Member Comments (2)
by ibizan, Jul 14, 2008 11:27PM
, Jul 14, 2008 11:27PMTo: hatvika
there is no test that will determine if u have low risk hpv unless u have visible warts.What u r proposing to tell ur wife is a lie.....high risk hpv doesn't lie dormant in a man for 16 years then his wife gets it.....so why r u going for hpv testing if there is no test?the chondyloma is more a risk to ur wife!u need to do the right thing be honest step up to the plate and accept the consequences of ur behavior...lying begets more lies!
by ibizan, Jul 15, 2008 06:31PM
, Jul 15, 2008 06:31PMTo: bmyers
this is rip-off..there is no definitive test for male HPV as of this date.....the doctors in this forum with 30 years of experience do not mention this.What u have posted is baloney and misinformation!
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