5 year old with behavior problems in kindergarten

[laniebug]

My 5 year old started kingergarten 2 months ago and is acting up almost everyday at school. She brings home yellos and red bears for the most part which is bad behavior. My question is what is she doing that is so bad in school. Doesn't the teacher know how to deal with children acting up and discipline themselves. It is creating problems at home everytime she gets a colored bear. I have taken things away from her and given her pep talks to change her behavior but nothing is working. She says she pushes only when she is pushed first. I tell her to tell the teacher but her reactin takes place first. I don't know what else to do. She is well behaved at home. Maybe she is acting up because I am not there to instill proper behavior! They do have time out's at school and I know they get used, but it's senseless to send home these bears and have parents going through all this aggresion towards the children.


This discussion is related to 5 Year Old Temper.

[babygirl6152]

the  green yellow red incentive chart was used at the school we taught at for behavior- let me draw you a picture so  you can get an idea what is going on in the classroom- it was a nonverbal reminder to help the child self discipline- yes- but that gives the child 3 chances- we are training them as you did on things- when your baby first held his cup or bottle a certain way he learned that milk came out- so he was trained then to manipulate the bottle in a way to get the milk if he was thirsty.

Teachers that use this method would prefer not to call attention all day to children by fussing a lot- yes there is a quick reminder when they get change in colors- example-

child A has trouble sitting still in story time- the teacher is all fussed out- she has given chance after chance and imagine we are 6 weeks into the school year- the child is cooperating on the days that they remember which is good- but there is no motivation to  REMEMBER- if all they are getting is a quick remark from teacher to 'try again try again try again-" It is actually better for the student to have this incentive to stay still and not get her color moved with clothespin to yellow then red.....
CHILD B has trouble keeping his hands to himself- same thing- teacher is all fussed out and is spending way too much time directing the one child that is distracting in line- when we line up we keep our hands to ourselves- but some kiddos want to hang on their neighbor or push or elbow them or just play with their hair-  the teacher knows believe me at any given time what child is working on their own individual weaknesses.
you know how it is to fuss and fuss and fuss and it seems as if you are going nowhere- yes she could sit there and do that with your child all day long if there were maybe 3 children- but there are usually 14- or more. They usually only had a little time-out after they got to red- and we actually did not want parents to think they had to discipline for these- it was just a nonverbal reminder to see how much more the teacher would go til they got a time-out- see?



The day will come probably closer to Christmas when your child starts coming home saying- I stayed on green- and the next day and the next day- then I stayed on green all week- man that will be time for a celebration-

hope that helps- it stresses mom if she doesn't understand but believe me by first grade their 1 st grade teachers will appreciate that the K teacher got all these things worked out before she had to deal with it- and in grade 1 they more or less have to have obedient children so they can teach reading, math - the big stuff- these days- even in grade 1

just my 2 cents- hope it helps

[imanaddict]

I had the same problem with my stepson last year and come to find out, it was his teacher and not him! She was the one who nitpicked about EVERYTHING, even the smallest things, and our rule at home is if you get in trouble at school, you get in trouble at home. We finally had to stop punishing him when we realized it was her and evidently she either didn't like him, or she just had a chip on her shoulder. My advice is to talk to the teacher after school one day with your child and see if you can get to the bottom of it. That way if it is your child and not the teacher, your child will know you are working together and bad behavior won't be tolerated. Also, talk to your child at home and let her know that bad behavior affects other kids learning as well as hers and it's important that she behave for her sake as well as her friends. Good luck!

[MomtoCade]

Hello, I just posted the same question on behavioral problems with my son.  Good Luck
I hope that someone has some ideas for us.

[Natta1980]

Hey - I have the same question - what is she doing that is so bad in school? It is probably time to communicate with the teacher. Plus, agression is not really useful form of discipline anyway.