Feel like Im about to lose it agian. Slipping away into darkness. Mom is yelling. She is calling me names. She is throwing things. I am falling into pieces. Why cant she be nice. Do I deserve this? Can I make it through? I feel like theres no point in anything anymore. trying to hang on. Trying not to give in. Everything is just so awful now. I dont know. I dont know. We really argued. I hate argueing. So mad so depressed. Everything but happy. What is happy? It doesnt exist.