i still think what Noah wrote was superfunny and im not embarrassed to share it. and, for the record, sorry to offend anyone but I do not intend to date Jewish guys. that's just a policy. I can break it. but its not in the plans. ive grown up with them. believe me I know them well enough. firshtay?
its the first night I took a shower here in the Norm Bates lockeroom. it went ok. I did it cold like you say H. that worked wonders. it was fast.
it is the first night I will sleep here since The Incident. now im afraid the LAPD will come pounding on my door all the time ... I mean, late
but I feel aite right now. clean and ready for bedski!
this Wallace guy is starting to really be a stalker. I am so glad he does not know where I live. he is sweet, but sort of cereal killer ish. obsessive / possessive
I need a wax BADLY
does any of this make me seem like im not taking my recovery or recent sui attempt seriously? sorry. its not how it is if you think that ...
but, just to clarify I still don't consider it a real attempt. I think I scared the hell out of me and everyone. and that bothers me.. a lot. to have worried everyone. but I don't think I wanted to seriously go thru with anything. I think I ws just freakin drunk and really sad.
and out of my mind.
besides that I was really ok.
a little joke ... not to make light of it!
I looked into several rehabs that someone here advised me kindly about. my fave is still C help maybe cuz I know it the best and it showed the bedrooms. I know don't take me to task! the bedroom is the most important part to me. well ... not for that reason! I just want to see that people aren't being tortured in there and like stripped of their teddy bear collections and whatnot
this place has the most programs and activities plus I have been there to pick up some friends. and the people who work there seem cool. and they have the sports stuff and workout stuff
yes, im concerned with all the important stuff sic!
but at least im looking
I still don't know if icould even afford it. C Help took a message and is calling me back tomorrow when the clerical staff is in. see/ you think I fukk around. I don't. I mean. um
don't want to seem too manic here ... so I wont talk about the Other kind of fukking around ... ok?
I talked to some ppl on medhelp and pm'd and texted and I just adore and love everyone and you are so good to me. and the notes and stati and everything and everything is so neato and great and j comments and even the j censure well ok not that is fun
and I love you all for being there for me even when you say things I don't want to hear I still love you then too.
but I must maintain that MY prolems are much bigger than anything any rehab can handle especially in 30 days. you don't know me. ok, you do. but I am SUPER FUKKED UP man
you know it!
so ... you know?
and my rage and hurt are just like beyond Trent Reznor
ok am I being too manic
ill try to be depressive
ok sike I was that earlier as many of you know.
serislee tho I think the Lithium actually CREATED my mood swings or made them worse
ok Meegy now you really are being para
go to bed
and I mean to sleep young lady!