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Apr 17, 2016 - 0 comments

I can't leave you a note or write on your  status James.  Maybe later I'll contact tech support.  Hope you are doing ok



(winter) solstice

Dec 13, 2015 - 2 comments

you know what i dont like about nano?

its gimmicky?

Bring on the night
I couldn't spend another hour of daylight
Bring on the night
I couldn't stand another hour of daylight

The future is but a question mark
Hangs above my head, there in the dark
Can't see for the brightness is staring me blind
God bid yesterday good-bye

--the popo

you know i am feeling a smidgeon better

a smidgeon

rhymes with pigeon

did you know that you can enjoy an exhilarating 1.75 0z bag of chex mix for a mere 200 calories?  why yes

henry rollins is, again, playing the discordant and irritating hodgepodge of sound he calls music


eight more days you can do it, Meegy!!!!!

eight more days til the solstice

then everythang gonna be lekkin up

gettin lighter and lighter each day

like me

YES you WERE lucky to have me in your life rr!  yes i AM wearing adorable black boyshorts that somewhat cover my fine azz  (4-5 pounds less of it i might add)

Yes you WERE lucky to have me in your life





jeezus man

we just got this one day right.  or this moment.

i think the ony way to use it is to make art.  i mean.

all the best blues men just made art

berryman made art

sylvia made art

anne made art

kurty made art

and *I* shall (continue to) make art TOO!!!

despite the conniving world's best efforts to DISSUADE me!

HAH!  i spit in your dissuasion!!!!   SPIT IN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hey.  i dint know 'dissuasion' was really a word!  delightful!


goodnight my fellow non subscribers



ps yes I DID work today in case you was wondrin

raul & me

Oct 25, 2015 - 2 comments

so don't play with me, cuz you're playing with fire

it wasn't MY idea that Raul "shoot by" my house and visit me

it wasn't MY email that said "I really miss you, Miss.  when can i see you?"

and it wasn't MY fault that we wrote 30 emails back and forth today

it was my fault, however, that I considered actually doing it.

but it did not happen.


did i tell you how much i LOVE Ivenna?

how the day before my last day she spent TWO HOURS with me, both of us crouching over a computer in Muriel's hub's classroom, looking at avatars of anime for her Halloween costume?  because she knew i was leaving before everyone else (Isolde told her) and she wanted to spend Q. time with me?


i would never do that to Ivenna.

neither would Raul, it turns out.

He's seventeen!

Daim!  leave me alone.  He's the best looking kid in the skule.  Ok, one of them.  i mean, they're all cute but --



NO i did not almost break down Lit's door so I could soothe my injured ego!

or my --

never mind.

I made dinner.  A tortilla with a little bit of each of chicken, beans and corn ... and tomatoes.  it was good.  and lemon.  b/c i have a slight mig and i don't eat salsa when i have it

I went to the Cactus Gardens.  maybe ill post a pic but its prolly similar to the others.

i'm not going to work tomorrow.  b/c i have no job.  one of the less obnoxious parents Whatsapped me asking for math homework for her daughter b/c she is going to have a tutor and they need some work.

I am lonely, and tired.

When i got back to my car after walking from the cactus gardens to the parking lot, i had  a huge coughing attack.  which is weird cuz it has somewhat abated.  i'm out of my inhaler.  i am going to go to the doctor or at least make a appointment tomorrow morning

but.  the thing is they were doing construction around the gardens.  but the whole time i was IN the gardens, i was ok

well i coughed all the way home (this little meegy)

and then i ran to my apartment, slathered baby vix on my chest, made a cup of tea with lemon and downed it and put on the vaporizer or whatever it is and breathed in some steam from the tea

and i feel betters

i also sukked two more puffs out of my inhaler.

so ya

i want the a/c

ima go to bed soon.  i know it's 7 p.m.

i feel ok i guess

oh yeah i forgot to tell you:  if it turns out i have cancer (though i had a lung xray and it was negative)  I AM going to fukk Raul

i mean.  if i'm gonna die Ivenna won't care if I freak her man (once, ok?)




Oct 24, 2015 - 1 comments

omg hi


i'm home!  quit my job!

yes, i do admit i get off on quitting jobs!!!  LOL.  its a great FUKK YOU feeling!  yesssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!  it's really a terrific high ... i felt SO AMAZING on the way there, driving to return all the books and keys ...

but, like every high, you have to come down ...

wow i just ...

i was trying to stave it off until Wednesday when I meet with my old boss of the ESL skule.  then i would have more leverage.  but ill just try and play it off or just ask her for what i want regardless.

i was even thinking of making her sign a contract.  ha ha ha!  yes!  HER!  the employer!  i have been tossing around the idea for a while as teaching sort of as an indie contractor.  can you do that?  i mean why not?  it's america?  do i have to register a fictitious bidnis name or something?

it was amazing the amount of spit (not to mention the students' work) that i had already accumulated in my apartment.  but i took all that spit in a box and put it in my car, and took my clicker and card key to get into the garage.

then i drove down there.  i had sent my address to both the Veep and the Principal last night but neither of them said anything of it (so they can mail me my last check ... i hope.  i need it but tbh i dont care if they dont.  maybe i can sue them if they dont!)

shocking not, i guess, the school was being used by the yeshivabouchers (thats what my moms always calls them) for some Shabbat celebration.  there were tons of YOUNG hasidic jews in full outfit with their obnoxious kids and wives (who wore shorter skirts i noticed, than i thought was "shneesy") ... i had worn cut offs and my lavender tee with my low top Converse on purpose.  they stared.  i looked right back at them.  

but there was no one i knew.  i left the stuff in the classroom and i had to use the key to get back down the elevator to the garage so i put it in an old school desk in the garage after i got downstairs.

when i got home i emailed the Veep and the Principal a short note ... i thanked them for giving me the gift of purpose, direction and freedom.  i said that it had been a pleasure working at their skule (a slight fib .. .i hope moses doesnt come to get me) and i wished them all the best.

i mean!

i am so TICK and SIRED of splainin myself!



i talked to those biches face to face!

i mean, what was in it for me?

what was the GOOD part of that job?

-it was far and the commute was hellish at best
-the clothing socked and made my underwear soaked (for the wrong reasons!) by the time i got to work b/c it was so hot and i sweated so bad
-the parents socked
-the kids socked
-the skule was totally disorganized
-the pay socked
-the job was super hard
-it took so much out of me
-with the commute it turned into a 40 hour plus a week job
-the principal gleefully informed me that she was in EVERY classroom every day!

you know mh i don't ax for much   ... she low balled me on the salary and i LET IT GO (i shouldnt have but it wouldnt have helped ... nothing was worth that job)

and ALLS i ax for was for her to get her fat azz out of my room!!!
sorry.  not to be mean

so now ... she and the VEEP have such a hardon to get into that classroom ITS ALL THEIRS!!!!!!!!  go for it, biches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


the principal imeed began blowing up my fone.  i have not answered or listened to the messages.
when i talked to her yesterday in her office she said i was probably her most qualified teacher.  THATS how she pays and treats her most qualified teacher!  the ONLY one with a credential and a Masters?  FUKK YOU lady!


in my resignation email i said that i had strong beliefs, and some of those beliefs included integrity, showing appreciation for the people in our lives while we could, and actions.  i said some other quals too.  i said that in my opinion we are here for such a short time that it is incumbent upon each of us to do our very best.  i mean ...  yes, i could be more assertive but i have to stick up for me here ... i was lied to about the job and the school.  I wasn't told even half the story.  i was low balled on the salary ... my decision to take the job WAS hasty and i take reponny for that ... but i maintain that if they had told me the TRUTH about the job it might have affected my deciz to take it!  which is why they didn't ... but they don't know me.  well, the VEEP does.  actually she tried to tell the principal i was serious about what i said but apparently she did not succeed

i am aching and burning over Raul's begging to see me.  he is not married but medhelp my allegiance is now to cooch bearers.  as much as i love men and as much as i omg so dig Raul ... he's 17!!!! im 46!  and i LOVE Ivenna!  it's wrong, right?


i SO want to.

really do

ok ill be backski