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Hopeless Fiction Writer

Feb 26, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

writing

,

Fiction

,

hopeless

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college

,

i hate college

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no one reads this anyway



I want to write FICTION!! NOT articles for some s h i t newspaper or a stupid flipping magazine. I do not want to write lab reports, research papers, creative non-fiction, biographies, brochures, instruction booklets, or ANYTHING other than MY books which I ALREADY WRITE. I do not want to be a teacher. I do not want to be an engineer, a pilot, a carpenter, or anything else that career assessments tell me I should be. I do not want to have to pay more money for four years of college than I'll earn in ten years with a degree. I do not want to go into business, law, or music, as I am not good at any of them and would not make any money. I do not want to "change the world". I do not want to be a chemist, mathemetician, or anything else. I do not want to be anything except for me, the fiction writer! I'd like to be good at somehting else, really I would, but I'm not. I'm not good at anything else, and as soon as everyone else accepts that, the sooner they'll all stop harrassing me to get a job EVEN THOUGH I'm already a full-time student with barely enough free time to get done what I should and to have a boyfriend, who is the only person on earth keeping me sane right now. God, I just hate it allllllllll........... Ugh. It's so hopelesssssssss. I hate school sooo much and it reaps me of my happiness and creativity and all hopes for the future. If school is supposed to prepare you for the future then why do I feel like I don't have one? Wah, I just want to melt into myself and disappear.

Plans

Feb 22, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

future

,

college

,

Life

,

adulthood



I am pretty sure I am not going to enroll in college next semester. It's too much of a waste of money for what I'm getting out of it. And I'm not blaming college. If I don't want to/can't do the work, why should I pay to fail? I want to have a go at supporting myself with my talents. And until then, I'm going to just get a job, any job, so that I'll have a source of incom. I'll just work and work and work indefinately, until I can afford to rent an apartment and then I'll keep working, all the while trying to publish. That's my rather unambitious dream. And I don't care what people say about it. Judge if you want. I'm content with it. Bring it on.

Why I Hate College: Reasons 1-25

Feb 21, 2012 - 1 comments
Tags:

college

,

lonely

,

trapped

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jaded

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bored

,

hungry



25 reasons I hate college:
1. I am out-of-state, a two hour drive from home, and I don't know anyone else here. Anyone. Else. Here.
2. As the above statement suggests, I have no friends here. All my friends live back in Ohio, and most of them are still in high school.
3. My boyfriend of seven months is two hours away, in high school, and I only see him twice a week, on Fridays and Saturdays.
4. The food here is so bad that I've dropped almost four pant sizes since moving in. And I wasn't even fat before.
5. My snowboots have tried to kill me while walking down stairs. The bruise lasted two months.
6. I've gotten sick three times in six months (which is more than I've ever gotten sick before). The last two times were only two weeks apart. Nothing like a chest cold followed by a head cold. What better way to start of the year?
7. I get pimples now even though I had a clear face in high school.
8. I've started getting headaches even though I've never had them before.
9. I have worse dry skin than I've ever had because of the water here. Seriously, some days the backs of my hands are florescent red, they practically glow! And they're all coarse and gross-feeling. They feel like man-hands.
10. Public bathrooms. I don't think I have to explain why that's awkward. If you don't get it, think of having diarrhea and everyone who lives in your hall cal hear it. Or think of having to hear someone else's explosive diarrhea while you're trying to eat pudding in your room. Oh, and you can also hear people barfing.
11. ****** cell phone service. So not only do I hardly see my boyfriend, I also can't have phone calls with him.
12. ****** internet provided by the college. So I can't Skype him either.
13. I'm taking a bunch of classes I'll never need, that I'm not interested in, just because I need four classes to be a full-time student and live on campus.
14. If I'm not a full-time student, I don't get my $16,000 per year scholarship.
15. Without my scholarship, school is $44,000 a year.
16. I never leave my dorm room except for bathroom breaks, meals, and classes. It's like prison.
17. Even when I do get out of my dorm, campus is so small I could walk across it in five minutes.
18. I feel trapped so I get bored very easily and can never focus on work. I never read for classes and then don't know anything on the exams.
19. There is nothing fun to do on campus. All they have here are bars. I don't drink, and even if I did, I don't have anyone to drink with.
20. There are only 1,600 other students here. But I still don't talk to any of them. The only person I talk to is my roommate, and she's always out with her boyfriend.
21. It seems like everyone here is dating someone else who also goes here, while my boyfriend is hundreds of miles away.
22. I go 80 on the freeway even though the speed limit is 70, and I've never been pulled over. Even the cops ignore me.
23. The school has pizza day sometimes three times a week. Their pizza ***** balls. I have never had greasier pizza. Ever. It's disgusting. But everyone still loves it and requests it, even though there are two actual pizza places here that they could call for pizza from.
24. Drunk people like to scream "Penis!" in the parking lot right below my window at one in the morning. Or they sing. Or they just scream. Or they drive up, screaming and whooping, with their radios blasting and I can feel the bass from my four-foot-high loft bed in my third-floor room.
25. I'm so bored that I never take notes in class. I can always print them online anyway, except then my professors randomly stop putting them online after two weeks of me not taking notes and then I'm just ******. Even though I draw in class so it looks like I'm taking notes.
To be continued.