All Journal Entries Journals
Sort By:  

The pain of being Silent

May 05, 2012 - 1 comments
Tags:

Relationships

,

Pain

,

chronic

,

itch

,

friends

,

alone

,

Women's Health



Hello all, I'm a 17 year old girl and I, like all other people my age am really looking forward to graduation in a few weeks. I've had a boyfriend for 2 and a half years, and life should be looking up, right? I also for the last month have been suffering from a painful series of  chronic  UTIs, one of  which got  so bad that there was visible blood  in my urine. The severe ones have caused me to miss days of school, concerts, and fun times with my friends and boyfriend.
Another horrible part of this is the dryness. Not  only is it always uncomfortable no matter what I do but it also puts a strain on my relationship. I'll get aroused but not wet and I can see that it makes my boyfriend feel inadequate. Thankfully he  is very understanding and it's never caused a conflict but he doesn't know how frequent this is because I use lubrication not only before sex but in my daily life to try to decrease the pain and itch. This dryness also keeps me from doing a  lot of activities because  it  gets too uncomfortable to hike,  climb, and ride bikes. The  best time of my life is turning into a  time of loneliness and silent pain.  
I wish I could see a doctor about this but my mother is so adamant about me not having sex, we've never had a good relationship and I don't  think that will change anytime soon. It's very hard to talk about this and I need to get past  this pain and embarrassment. This will be my journey to a new life, one that I can live comfortably and