Jun 04, 2012
Day 4. God, I wish I could wake up and it be 4 years ago. A time before I let opiates take over my life. Granted, I have been taking pain pills for 14 years. But the first decade I was on a relatively small dosage. My script allowed 6 Lortab a day. Most days I wouldn't take even half that. Then I found a diff Dr. He changed and increased my meds, and my life rapidly spun out of control. It feels like everything I do, everyday, revolves around me snorting 30's up my nose. I am so ashamed. This isn't me. I want to be healed. I want to kick this ugly ****** habit so bad. I'm scared too, though. I am scared of the pain and debilitating exhaustion that I will be left with after the narcotics have left my body. God, please help me with this. Please ease my suffering. Please miraculously cure me.