All Journal Entries Journals
Sort By:  

Satan says "Welcome Back!"

Jun 16, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

satan

,

Say

,

welcome

,

Back

,

Pain

,

Lung

,

breathing

,

Eating

,

Neck

,

head

,

Baby

,

Anxiety

,

mood tracker



My stomach has been queasy and cramping all night. The usual nightmares, dead babies, and worse if anyone might believe it. Tortured psyche, tired one too. Breathing is a chore, difficult and heavy this morning. Anxiety is pouring over me, stomping through me- marching down my neck, my lungs, tiny soldiers murdering my peace, Shrunken down, snot- nosed nasty Neanderthal hillbillies square dancing in my stomach, swinging partners, round and round, spinning one by one into a drunken line dance down my intestinal walls,- and my head- my head- stock tip for you- Immitrex, Ibuprofen- because I am eating them like skittles, or no, nevermind- just skittles...

Haunted by a self once thought to be so long gone- and here we are in not so gentle or peaceful atonement... Am I the shadow or the ghost? I am only pain....

*** med change I marked because I need to get my wellbutrin from pharmacy.

Mood Tracker

My first entry

Jun 15, 2012 - 0 comments
Tags:

firsts

,

first entry

,

Pain

,

Hope

,

help

,

mood tracker

,

meds

,

help me

,

weeks

,

people

,

day

,

Is

,

toes



This is something that I am interested in. Presently, I am more or less just evaluating "the process" here. Meaning that I will probably end up trying a few of "these" in order to find out which one I might like the best. This is my first experience with any kind of mood tracker, chart, etc. My therapist recommended that using "this" could help me to communicate more thoroughly with my Psychiatrist as recently "we" are working on some serious med changes.-

Today is a great day! Comparatively, it most certainly it is. That is considering the incredible amounts of pain, apathy, sadness, and all but the complete abandon, evaporation even of a hope I once naively believed much more solid, if not concretized-  these past couple of weeks have been hell. So any day out of hell is usually at least okay, as long as it is not in heaven! Who would ever want to go there? Crazier people than I.  :)

Mood Tracker