I suppose this was inevitable.  About 10 last night I got a call from the nursing home to advise that my 92 year-old mother had fallen.  Spent a marathon night with her in ER, sure enough she fractured her hip.  The ER thing took on such a nightmarish quality - she has dementia and became very combative when they tried to draw labs and do x-rays and such.  She tried to bite the doctor when he examined her!!!  So hard to see her this way - my very proper, ladylike mother (who considered "shut-up" to be a swear word) - the dementia has stripped away any remaining sense of decorum.

After they put her on a morphine drip and she was resting comfortably, I came home around 5:30 am and caught a few hours sleep.  Now I have to jump back into it.

The word is this can go two ways - we can decline surgery and Mom never walks again and is in constant pain (which must be managed with drugs).  Otherwise the surgery to repair the fracture is very risky and there's a good chance she will not survive the procedure or its aftermath.  What to do, what to do?  I can't see declining surgery just to prolong her life if she will be immobilized and in constant pain (or drugged) and thereby have such poor quality of life.  On the other hand, we all have to die of something and if we roll the dice and she has the procedure and for any reason doesn't make it, at least she goes out fighting.

I think I'm gonna have to vote for surgery, even with its risks.  I can't see condemning her to a bedridden life of pain.  She could last that way for years, potentially, but what's the point?  She tells me, in her lucid moments, that she doesn't want to live any more.

HATING THIS!!!

Lots of people know that a person charged with a crime has a constitutional right to an attorney.  Criminal defendants who cannot pay are represented by public defenders, legal aid societies and court appointed counsel.  

Fewer people are aware that the federal government funds no-cost legal representation for qualifying individuals in certain civil matters.  By no-cost, I mean the client is NEVER charged any fees whatsoever; no hourly fees, no contingency fees (i.e., % of any amount recovered), no filing fees or court costs.

Lyndon Johnson’s “War on Poverty” initiatives gave rise to legislation that included funding for civil legal services.  Legal services attorneys represent clients in disputes that affect basic human rights.   These programs include representation in areas such as:

  Housing.  Landlord-tenant disputes, evictions and matters related to public housing/Section 8 benefits are covered under homelessness prevention initiatives.

  Domestic violence, child custody/visitation.  Disputes involving family court orders of protection and appropriate    custody and visitation arrangements and other problems arising from violence against women are funded under family violence prevention programs.

  Child advocacy.  Legal services lawyers represent parents seeking proper educational services for special needs children.

  Elder law.

  Government benefits.  Representation is available to appeal denials of various benefits (SSI, SSDI, AFDC, etc.)

There’s help available. Many gifted attorneys either volunteer their time or work for modest salaries to provide access to justice.

Bloodwork is back, about as expected.  Should be able to hold on for 6 more weeks with maybe a little more procrit.  Fine, all well and good.

Then the bomb - my CEA level (tumor marker) is rising.  After 3+ years cancer free is this really the time to rain on my parade?  Can't a girl get a couple of months off between diseases?

I just ordered my very last round of tx drugs from Curascript.  I can hardly believe I made it this far - and now I have just six more shots to go.

I just had to crow about this.