This week was uneventful as far as medication side effects. But I had to deal w/ a horrendous muscle spasm in my shoulder. It started Thurs and I finally went to the ER Sunday. They gave me meds that didn't help at all. I'm still in a lot of pain and my arm and fingers are numb. I’ve barely slept since Thursday - I don't want to take anymore meds.

My viral load has dropped from 3.5 million to something - goodness I forget the number - but if the virus isn't undetected by my next appt in Sept - I have to make a decision to stop TX or go 72 wks. Decisions - Decisions. I hope I’m just a ‘slow responder’. Also instead of weekly lab work I go only 2 times a month - this is a very good thing.

Pegasys came through w/ the free medication this week - thank goodness.
My wbc remains low - today I took the Neupogen and can feel the sides of that starting to kick - in.
rbc is still low but manageable – my energy level fluctuates between low and medium.

All my other lab work is good -
One thing I have notice is my brain is becoming a lot 'foggier'  sometimes I don't have a clue to what people are talking about -  and it's too much of an effort to figure it out :) Like I think I'm on week 9 or is it 8?????

Sunday
Whew!  I took my injection Friday and it's been down hill from there. This injection seems worse than last weeks....Aleve is not working on the body aches. I'm draggin and feel REALLY yucky again. But I made myself go to the store today. It is getting more difficult to drink water - I love water - now I'm on a cranberry jc w/ gingerale kick. I don't even like 'pop/soda' but now I find myself drinking it.

Got my eyes checked - - no damage to my retina - my eyes are just very dry - I use Systane already.

I'm attempting to sign up for patient assist for the Pegasys - all the forms are signed and filled out - but I noticed the Dr. did not include a prescription for the meds ... more delays.

My apartment is looking a little crazy ... I hate that - Me first - apartment later :-))

Getting a little more teary lately - but I'm handling it.  Go see my therapist this week - that's always a significant emotional event lol

My appetite goes up and down and now I hate coffee and cigarettes!  actually that comes and goes.

I can tell my white count is down again. My teeth feel ‘funny’, bladder infection coming on, I get congested right in the middle of my chest and I can't stand touching newspaper - I have to put Vaseline on my fingertips to do so - weird! All of the above vanishes once I take the Neupogen.

What's positive - writing this.  And only 40 more weeks to go ...

The sides from the injection kicked in about 4pm today - ache all over - I took two Aleve - it's 6:45 pm and my body still hurts - just not as bad. It's OK - I hope the meds are in there working - rootin those little Critters out!.

My ABS Neutrophill count dropped to 580 last week - but they let me take the injection Friday anyway. I go for labs (cbc) tomorrow and if they've dropped more the neupogen will be increased to twice a week or I guess I have to skip a shot - again. My rbc also continues to decrease - but not enough to take the Procrit (sp)

My left eye 'feels' hazy but it's not - I can't describe it - so I'll make an appt w/ the ophthalmologist (sp) on Monday. My eye felt like this when I first started tx but it went away.

My hair is soooo dry .... I'm doing everything to maintain moisture ... but that only lasts about a day or two.

                                          Enough w/ the physical stuff!

I watched my grandsons yesterday - WHY do I do that????? When they're here it's ok - but once they leave I feel wiped out. Anyway, I'm getting a little too grouchy to deal with anyone for longer than a minute.

I need to start chanting my old mantra again - "NO! is a Complete Sentence"

I need an 'emotional retreat' except I don't know what that means (isolation???).....

On the positive side - Yes there is one.... I had a great time w/ my sister - she loves to spend money and I helped her. It was a 'fun' distraction.

My outfit for my son's wedding is complete - down to the spandex to make sure everything stays in place. Hair, nail, and make-up appointments are made - thankfully, I'm still excited about it. Maybe if I stop babysitting Now - by August I'll have enough energy saved up to make it to the wedding .... we will see

The encouragement from everyone helped. The side effects of the Riba are becoming an issue. Wed night I felt the rage rising - like being tangled up in and trying to fight my way out of  a spider web. I'm going to ask my Riba be reduced back to 1,000 / this didn't start to happen until it was increased to 1,200.

No side effects from Friday's injection - it's Sunday and that's when they usually kick in. I'm a little tired but I'm dealing. My sister came in from FL yesterday - and of course we're hanging out - although I felt wiped out by the time we came back home  yesterday.

Today I just want to 'chill', but we have some visiting to do. She would understand if I backed out - but I think I'll be ok.

The NP didn't call back Friday about my lab work just have to wait until they do. I have thrush (yuk) and a bladder infection from low neutrophils - my pcp prescribed meds for that.

So I'm hanging in there - I don't feel positive or negative - but thank goodness I don't feel rageful! Just puttin one foot in front of the other and looking straight ahead ... day by day