started bleeding again today. since about last week only when i wipe it has been brown, even SMALL clots but all brown, and then today, of course, went in for blood and the second i paid i felt that gush. went to the bathroom and sure enough......grrrrr, i just want it to stop, i know everything is ok and i have my next u/s on thursday but its so un-nerving!!!!!! i just keep repeating our conversation Noela!!!! i trust you and i feel in my heart i am well but my mind is spinning!!  *sigh* o well, needed a little vent there.....cant wait to hear that i get to start weining off my meds, its difficult to take them any more, i want to throw up when i do....

Aidyn Denen is in Heaven

u/s went well, little heart is beating at 135, which if it speeds up 3 beats a day, thats great from the 115 (i added the 3 beats a day and i got to 132 from last u/s) they also let me know, they are expecting me to bleed some more, they said i still have a pocket of fluid in there, kinda big but my little angel is doing well. i do have a question though, reading things online say that my mucus plug is slowly forming now, if i start bleeding before its finished, will it wash away with it or if it completes before i finish, will it just obsorb in there till the baby arrives? this is just stuff i forgot to ask till i was at work. just wondering....dont want to bleed anymore but if i do, with the help of my wonderful friends and the helpful warning, i think ill be ok.

thanks for reading!!

Aidyn Denen is in Heaven

So today i felt something like i had started my period so i went to the bathroom, scared to death. i was bleeding again. i called my drs office and said i wanted to come intoday and have an u/s and blood, i cannot wait till thrusday!!!! they said i might have to wait for a while to squeeze me in but i went in anyway. i felt bad, they were in the middle of retrievals and the dr was so busy but i was scared and needed reasurance!!!!!! so i got up there and of course they didnt say anything so i was lying there so scared. well she then said, its still there. THANK YOU LORD JESUS ALMIGHTY!!!!!!!!!! she showed me the little heartbeat and said its beating at 115bpm. they said that if i was going to m/c the further i am along, the more painful it will be so what i felt last week would have been nothing. they told me to just relax, take it easy, now that we see a heartbeat and all my numbers were up last week, i ok. they took my blood and will let me know what i need to with my meds, how i need to mix them all up now (lately everything has stayed the same except adding the 2cc of PIO)

i kept appoligizing(sp??) knowing i dont need to but i felt like i was taking them away for nothing even though i dont know when it is something. this is the first time i have ever been pregnant and i have already lost one baby last week, what should i be expecting? how should i be reacting to this stuff? i automatically panicked(sp??)!! i just feel bad now for my dh, because this happened he wasnt there for the first heartbeat u/s with me! but last week, it happened the day before my scheduled appt. this week, this happened 2 days before, i am not in any position to take chances! i jsut feel bad for freaking out for nothing, but i, WE want this baby so much (like i need to say that, we all do) but *sigh* everything is ok and i feel better! i just wish is was the end of the week so i can have another relaxing weekend!

Aidyn Denen is in Heaven

i had a miscarriage today. we lost one of our babies. but on a lighter note, the other is still holding on, strong like his parents, right on track, 6 weeks and a heartbeat. doesnt make it any easier but i know it happened for a reason and my little angel is up in heaven watching over his little sibling and family here who will always love him!! im doing ok now, im not in anymore pain and the bleeding has subsided. i will get my results back tomorrow. what has happened is a terrible thing but i must admit, i am a little relieved. things were going too smoothly in my life right now and something was going to happen, im just thankful that i do still have one little miracle on its way and now that i know what it is like, i feel for all that have and will miscarry, it isnt something you would wish on your worst enemy!! my heart is with you all tonight and my angel up above. thank you

Aidyn Denen is in Heaven