Right, i haven't written for a while so figured i would do a quick update.
My migraines - not too bad, finally got my prescription for amitriptyline so its slowly getting better
Abdo pains - not good at all, still curving around my back and under my lower ribs :(
UTI - some symptoms gone, others not but i can't take my antibiotics as they're making me throw up :(
More random pain where a girl REALLY doesn't want it :'(

Anxiety & depression - really screwed up. Have been arguing non stop with everyone, screaming at my pets for stuff which either isn't their fault or is their nature as small kittens. Smashed my head into the door this morning, didn't improve my mood, and my fits of hysterical crying and screaming are happening more often :( I can't understand what's wrong with me in my head, but whatever it is it's getting worse i think. I understand that this may be the anxiety talking but everyone else is noticing too. I screamed so loudly at the cat this morning that my throat still hurts an hour later :(

My benefits statement came through today, this is the 4th time i've tried getting it sorted and they've screwed up again, they're telling me i haven't claimed for income support when i have, my partner only earns 15k a year and it doesn't go the distance, not with rent and food and bills :( Not even close :( So i have to go to the job centre and faff about AGAIN with them. As if i didn't have enough stuff to deal with.

I have a doctors appointment on friday, got my test results, no calcium defiency and no problems with the urea test thing, so yay for having more tests done, not.

Anyway thats my rant, the basics being im in pain, i'm stressed and if things carry on like this i'm going to end up with no friends, no fiancee, and a severe hatred of cats (i'm already part way there on this one). I also feel sick and have done every day for a week now :'(  Self pitying sod is how i feel and what i am at the moment. Not good and i don't expect anyone to particuarly care.

Well, its 2am just gone and i find myself awake again!
I finally phoned up the benefits people today, they've been screwing me around and i've been avoiding sorting it because i have trouble talking on the phone to people (i tend to panic and hang up). They're sending me out my form and all i have to do is take it in and that'll be fine.
However, i will only be getting around £45 a week, which although it'll support me for food won't pay the rent. I'm really stressed as me and my partner want to move out of my mums and into a place of our own. Its not just because we want privacy and space, it's because whenever i'm around my mum my anxiety and depression go nuts! She's always yelling at me and i have to tidy up after her and everyone or she threatens to kick us out. Even my partner is getting more depressed and angry about it, and he didn't believe me at first when i told him how bad she was to live with. She's an alcoholic but i tried talking to her about it and she just got defensive and told me to leave it. I don't know how much longer i can live with this, since i've been here i've self harmed twice and i constantly think of ways to leave all this **** behind. I used to do that but not nearly as often and i could usually cheer myself up by being with my partner or reading a book, but its stopped working now. I have 6 months to wait til i can see a counsellor/therapist and i keep feeling overwhelmed.
I've been told i can't work for 6 months but if i don't then i can't afford to move out and my mum is starting to come between me and my partner, we're arguing more and keep snapping at each other. I don't want to mess up this relationship like i have every other one, especially not because of my mum! I don't know what to do anymore! I can't live here but i can't move out, i can't work but i need to so that i have the money to get away from here, and just as i start sorting my health out a bit my stress levels go sky high and i end up feeling worse everyday. I just want everything to stop and leave me alone. I want to get away from it all and not be up all night wondering if my life is ever just going to be normal and peaceful :(
I've had a really messed up life and it just won't stop and i'm so sick of it all

Rant over, i can't stop crying and its making it hard to see the screen.
This isn't me trying to get attention i just needed to let it out before i go nuts!

Urine infection got worse yesterday so up the hospital i went as recommended. Another urine sample later and guess what???
I have a urine infection.
Clever doctors....
So now i have more painkillers and a different antibiotic to try for 5 days. Hopefully this will clear it up as its bloody horrible! I'm soo soo tired all the time, i fell asleep about 1 this morning (Early for me) and woke up at nearly 4pm, not once in between!

Well up til wednesday this week wasn't going too bad, i had some pain in my tummy and headaches as normal but not a huge amount of panicking. Wednesday night, i lost the electric key for the meter, so my mum went balistic, even though it was an accident and i spent hours looking for it. So very little electric because she lets it run down to £1 on emergency before topping it up again :( So can't cook/watch tv/go on pc or anything.Had to borrow money off my ex which is not something i wanted to do as he doesn't have much either! Anyway, went to the shop to buy sandwich stuff and met up with friends at the pub. I haven't been able to do that very much recently so it was a bit of a break through.My partner and i were there with a few of my friends, but partner had work at 6:30am so had to leave. I stayed as i've walked home from this particular area many times, its only about 20 minutes. So about 11 i leave, about 2/3rds of the way home in an alleyway some huge guy steps up behind me and grabs me. I couldn't move, i felt like i couldn't breathe. Smacked me about a bit which was terrifying, scratches on my face and bruises everywhere which now hurt like mad. I screamed when he tried doing more and blacked out, coming to on my own. We don't think he did anything more because according to my partner i got in at 11:30 and collapsed in the hallway. I don't even remember getting home :( In my past things like this and worse have happened, and i thought i could stop a person from doing it, i fought back before and i thought i could this time. However with my illnesses i've become a lot weaker as i have problems going out and exercising. My anxiety is now through the roof, and to top it all off agonising pain wouldn't stop on thursday and i had to go to the walk in centre (one of my least favourite places). I have lots of antibiotics to take for a urine infection now :( Not seeing how this week can get much worse, i'm arguing with everyone and very flinchy and nervous around guys, even my partner :( Not sure how much more of this i can take.
Does anyone have any ideas on how i can get my physical fitness up or somehow stop this happening as i feel like theres a neon sign above my head advertising for guys to try stuff, that i can't see. I don't dress slutty i tend to bundle up in a big coat, i don't know what it is. Please help!