~*~*~This is in memory of all the students that lost their lives in the Virginia Tech Massacre.~*~*~

Mommy.. Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great loud crack.
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did What I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
But Mommy, when I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye,
I'm sorry Mommy, I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, He hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, Got the gun from his older brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,
And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now,
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best;
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest.
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass.
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one deserves this,
Mommy, warn the others, Mommy I left without a kiss.
And Mommy tell the doctors; I know they really did try,
I think I even saw a doctor, Trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, With a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest.
Mommy I ran as fast as I could,
When I heard that crack, Mommy, listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new,
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, I know he will miss me too.
I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, Mommy, I wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know; you know it's true,
And Mommy all I wanted to say is, "Mommy, I love you.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

I walked into the clinic a few weeks ago, and there was this kid, about 16, lying there with an IV in his arm and a police officer over him. I asked a nurse what was going on. She told me that he got arrested for underage drinking, and he was here because he had alcohol poisioning (he blew a .23). I said that there was no smell of alcohol on him when I was walking by him. She told me about this new thing that teenagers were trying that gets them drunk. She told me that they were soaking tampons in strong liquor (like vodka) and sticking them up their back door. The vodka would soak into their bloodstream through the intestines and anus and get them drunk. It's undectable because it goes through the anus and not the mouth, so there is no smell of alcohol. It's actually clever, but completely dangerous. It is much more possible to get alcohol poisioning that way because before you know that you have "used" too many, you have. It never ceases to amaze me what kids come up with these days!

I couldn't believe it myself. If anyone got the September 1- September 7 issue of TV Guide Magazine in the mail today, check out the section that is called "Reader Reactions" (or something like that). I wrote an e-mail to TV Guide a few weeks ago expressing my disappointment about a recent article that told how much celebrities make per episode. I am a huge fan of Burn Notice, it is action packed and a real 'edge of your seat' show. The main character is played by Jeffrey Donovan. He does his own stunts and almost gets blown up on a daily basis and he makes only $55,000 an episode. On the other hand, Charlie Sheen of Two and a Half Men rakes in an amazing $825,000 an episode. All he does is sit on a couch and make sex jokes. How is that fair? I e-mailed them my rant, and they published it! HA!
My self-esteem cannot be touched right now!

I messed up real bad this past weekend. Nothing medical, don't worry.
I was at a party for my friend, Rachel, who just graduated high school. She's only 18, and she decided to get drunk at her party. There wasn't too many people at the party, about 9, including me. I really don't like to drink because it makes me crazy and sad. I had a few sips of my appletini, and watched the other girls play beer pong. I saw a girl that I used to hate drive by in a car, with a guy in the passenger's seat. She was dating this guy named Chris, and I automatically assumed it was him...because the last time I saw them, they were dating. Rachel started talking to be about the girl and I said "Oh yeah. She drove by earlier with Chris." and Rachel says "I doubt that. Chris is dating Tori (one of the girls at the party)." I said "Really? It looked like him...but I guess it couldn't have been." Rachel decides that she needs to prove to me that it couldn't have been Chris, so she goes and gets Tori and tells her that I said I saw Chris in the car with his ex-girlfriend. Tori flips out and starts threatening me, saying she wants to beat me. I was like "I never said..." but Rachel kept cutting me off. That pissed me off, but Tori had a shot of vodka and forgot alllll about it. Later, one of the girls, Stephanie, did almost the same thing. Stephanie is a hard-core partyer. She goes out and drinks almost every weekend. Rachel's parents are pretty cool, and I got to chatting with them (it got really hot and sweaty down in the basement where the party was because there was no air conditioning, so I needed to take a breather). Rachel's father started talking to me about drinking and he asked me how everyone was doing down in the basement. I said "They're fine." He nodded. He started talking to his wife about drinking, and then we started talking about underage drinking, and then we got into talking about alcoholics. Her dad said "I'm really worried about Stephanie. She seems to go out every weekend and drink." Then Rachel's mom said "I wonder if she's an alcoholic..." I chuckled a little and said "I know she loves to party hard, but I wouldn't say that Stephanie is an alcoholic." Apparently Rachel, who was pretty tipsy herself...and I guess had selective hearing, was listening to our conversation and she decided to go down and tell Stephanie that I said that I thought she was an alcoholic, even though I said I didn't think she was. Stephanie came up from downstairs and began to curse me out and say she wanted to strangle me. That was it. I couldn't take it anymore. I was the only semi-sober one there, and it seemed like everyone was picking on me, and twisting my words to see what would happen. I got in my car, and drove around to the next block (I had a couple, and I didn't want to accidently hurt someone or get pulled over for DWI), and I sat there for about 2 hours. I hate when people get in my face and tell me things that they heard from someone else and expect it to be things that I said or did. I felt like an jerk because Rachel's dad saw my freakout and now she says her dad is never going to trust her again. I feel like it's my fault that Rachel's party was ruined and that now I'm down like 6 friends. Even though I really never said anything that I would think would hurt someone, I guess it did. I feel guilty and mad at myself. I have talked to Stephanie and told her that I was sorry and I know that she believes what Rachel told her...but she's still mad at me. I don't know what to do....and I keep feeling like such a drama queen...the one thing I vowed to myself I would never become.