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Feeling Important

Feb 21, 2014 - 14 comments

I've always been warned not to be full of pride. I think in my extreme thinking I thought that meant no pride at all was the ultimate. "FULL" is the key word in that lesson. Humility mixed with pride is what they meant, not just full of pride alone. I have been trying to think in new ways, I have been really trying to focus on what I like about myself. Not being effected by many taboos or standards, I still find it hard to feel pride. I keep coming back to this thought. In a large way MH has helped me to see that it's okay to feel good about myself, I'm important. I've held peoples hands who I see are now able to reach people who can't relate to me as well. Both of them reach out and lift me back up and remind me of what I once said and felt. Passing time has multiplies those who reach out to help me. Each one of us makes a difference, and I can't disqualify the ME in US. It's not just you, I'm awesome too. I want to disqualify that by saying, "Not that I'm bragging or anything," but I won't

Im working on my list of good characteristics, hopefully I'll form more while I'm trying to accept the ones I have. Each action is like a pebble in a pond or echo on a mountain, touching and resinating with everything it passes through. The pebble has long settled by the time it's impact has slowed down. New and old sayings here are a good example. Someone hears something and repeats it, it becomes a pillar. I've heard things circulate for awhile that I've said, I have no idea the impact I make. It's exponential. And again, it is that way for all of us. We make a good team. I've been trying to make my intentions and hearts passion in line with what I do. Helping other people has been the best therapy for me, from people I just met to old friends, it makes me feel bigger than just myself. Thanks you every ONE for making me feel important.

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by ariley13, Feb 21, 2014
You are important and you are awesome! You are a very deep thinker and offer a refreshing perspective to things. You make me think about stuff that I normally wouldn't think about. How cool is that?

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by JustHelp123, Feb 21, 2014
Glad to give some in return Tony.  Nice to see this side of you

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by Ellen038, Feb 21, 2014
I like reading your journals because you have a different way of thinking then I do. Things you say are deep and sometimes a little confusing for my simple mind but I always take away something from them. You are unique just like each and everyone of us. That is what makes each of us special and we each hopefully add a little to help others out. I am glad I met you.

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by jugglin, Feb 21, 2014
You are very important...your words are powerful.  You have touched more people than you can ever know.  Your writing is very deep and personal.  Your passion shines thru in your words.  Even when somebody disagrees with you, you always allow them their thoughts and opinions as well, without judgment. I am one of the many who values you...deems you important.

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by JustHelp123, Feb 21, 2014
It's a pleasure to see you turn your contemplative nature inward; gives me more insight into your soul.  I'm looking forward to seeing more of your journal entries and am upset this is the first one I've read!  Your wisdom, compassion, and sense of humor are always a welcoming sight when I sign on.

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by spider6, Feb 22, 2014
Tony, my twin from another life............I relate to you more than you will ever know............your expression comes from my soul as well.  Thank you for bringing me back home,  I get lost occasionally.  ............hugs

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by ThePhoenix75, Feb 22, 2014
Tony,
you are perhaps the deepest most introspective thinkers I have ever had the opportunity to "know".  I appreciate so much how you can take a simple phrase and give it a meaning that I would have never considered.  You give solid, balanced advice with great compassion and care.  You have helped me and continue to help me in my recovery.  You, my friend, are invaluable around MH.

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by Tswana, Feb 22, 2014
A beautiful truth <3 Tswana xxxxx

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by BanMethadone, Feb 22, 2014
I absolutely love this post! I used to do the same thing, essentially disqualifying myself. I would think that others just had things that I did not, and it must be some special ingredient that allowed them to be successful. I have now come to see that it's just not true. The power to be successful at anything lies within our own hearts and minds. You are important, and if you put in the work toward recovery, or anything in life, you will see the results. I agree, that you first have to think you're worthy of a good life, and that you are important. You are, and you have something unique to offer the world that no one else can. You are special, and although you may not even realize it, others look to you and admire your qualities as well :)

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by Shannon79, Feb 22, 2014
I'm just getting to know you weaver, but from what I have seen you are very important to so many people. So I say toot your own horn! Shout it off the roof tops! Go ahead and brag! You have made a difference in so many people's lives, and you should feel very proud of yourself.

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by 007Bunny, Feb 22, 2014
Tony this post is incredible! Did you read my mind?
I got my self confidence beaten down by my own family. And I became very successful in it myself. It took me MANY years to find out that others don't know or are unable to do many things which I did. I was never good enough - in my own mind. Completely crazy.
With years and therapy came confidence and I finally saw that I really did in some cases really great work.
It is difficult to see when we are unwell. You are doing the right thing: writing the list of good things about yourself is a massive boost for your confidence and you will see that you are fantastic loving and helpful person. :)
Same as you I am thinking how to help other people. it is given to me to do that. I managed to help people to built their confidence and get new jobs etc.
This time I am thinking about teenagers with depression etc. I can't stand how they cut themselves, killing themselves just because their parents don't want to face the stigma of mental illness. Can't see how young people are wasted as are unable to get help they need. I am searching opportunities and what I could do. I am getting a bit obsessed with it lol. Thinking such ideas are coming to our minds as we are getting better.
All the best Tony, I love your posts and your way of thinking. :)x

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by weaver71, Feb 22, 2014
Just today a friend from 1800 miles away posted a Facebook picture of their "Not So Secret Garden" for homeschool kids. I felt like my time in Texas was a waste. We wanted to plant a seed of sustainable living in my homeland. It was such a struggle, they love styrofoam in the south. We taught one family how to garden organic and recycle, reduce, and reuse, cook with fresh food. They have started a foundation and are teaching people and planting natives in the parks. They are in the newspaper with their projects all the time, spreading the knowledge further. It's really growing, and they learned those skills on our farm and homeschool facility. One person made a difference, the ball started rolling. My illusion of failure has produced fruit Beyond measure. Seeing the fruit has proven to me, I am making a difference. My actions are continuing to grow in power long after my efforts are done. I am not the judge of my success. I must have faith that my right actions grow in power, even if they appear to be in vain.

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by nonights, Feb 23, 2014
We never fully know what positive power we had.

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by weaver71, Feb 23, 2014
Oh yeah, I'm going against my doctors orders, but I'm allowing myself to feel euphoria and sadness. Maybe it's dangerous, but that's a risk I am willing to take for now.

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