el_dave's Profile
Mood:
el_dave is
on cloud nine because my Baby Doll says she needs me.
About Me:
Male, 58, Tallahassee - FL, member since Apr 2008
There's nothing much to say. I love my girlfrend, my wife, and my bike, but don't want to wake up in the mornings. Don't know why....
[More]
Let's plagiarize The Boxer
May 09, 2008 08:54AM
- 4 comments
Tags:
Tags:
In the clearing stands a boxer and a fighter by his trade, and he carries a remindance of every glove that laid him down or cut him till he cried out in his anger and his shame, "I am leaving, I am leaving" but the fighter still remains.
Kids left me while I was in the booby hatch. I had no idea how one dehumanizes one's self when attempting self destruction. Waidaminnit, waidaminnit, I said "Kids left me", not "Kid left me". Kid had her bags packed, but something inside magically locked that front door. Some kind of lock she has no key to. Baby Doll turned down my invitation to do the horizontal twist, that's a first (don't worry, it turned out to be one of those "for your own good" dealie bobs and Sweetling is at least as intelligent as she is beautiful, so the misconception of my "not needing that distraction right now" has been corrected.. she's such a doll, always trying so hard to do "the right thing".. for her kids, for me, for her husband, for the Icepick, for the world.. the only one she never considers is herself).
Sweetling is such a choice treasure, but treasure is buried in chests under the earth. The earth is the planet, and The Icepick is that planet. Everything that happens is insignificant compared to Kiddo's packed bags. Well, for four nights in a row now, I go to sleep holding her, and for four nights in a row, when my old bones demand a change and I have to turn, Kiddo has turned to hold me too. Oh, thousands of dreary, unencouraging words have passed. But when we sleeps we dreams, and our dreams belong to us alone, and while sleeping and dreaming the 'pick is holding me too.
So the boxer remains.
Kids left me while I was in the booby hatch. I had no idea how one dehumanizes one's self when attempting self destruction. Waidaminnit, waidaminnit, I said "Kids left me", not "Kid left me". Kid had her bags packed, but something inside magically locked that front door. Some kind of lock she has no key to. Baby Doll turned down my invitation to do the horizontal twist, that's a first (don't worry, it turned out to be one of those "for your own good" dealie bobs and Sweetling is at least as intelligent as she is beautiful, so the misconception of my "not needing that distraction right now" has been corrected.. she's such a doll, always trying so hard to do "the right thing".. for her kids, for me, for her husband, for the Icepick, for the world.. the only one she never considers is herself).
Sweetling is such a choice treasure, but treasure is buried in chests under the earth. The earth is the planet, and The Icepick is that planet. Everything that happens is insignificant compared to Kiddo's packed bags. Well, for four nights in a row now, I go to sleep holding her, and for four nights in a row, when my old bones demand a change and I have to turn, Kiddo has turned to hold me too. Oh, thousands of dreary, unencouraging words have passed. But when we sleeps we dreams, and our dreams belong to us alone, and while sleeping and dreaming the 'pick is holding me too.
So the boxer remains.
A comment from Johnny Cash, subject to interpretation:
I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything ....
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt .....
I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time,
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt .....
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would change myself
I would find a way.
I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything ....
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt .....
I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time,
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt .....
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would change myself
I would find a way.
Geez, I sure do feel sorry for the person that describes. Fortunate people like me see enough early enough to change things early enough that we don't get to the point described. I've seen it, though, as have you. Hildy just brought more coffee. We call it "mamafied", and the meaning of something being "mamafied" is simple: "it doesn't get any better than that". Nine hours sleep last night, no chemical assistance. Zero hours sleep without chemical assistance for four or five years before. The 'pick and I just had quite a goof session going while doing sandbox maintenance. What is this thing with the Icepick doing sandbox maintenance? Suddenly the Icepick will do sandbox maintenance? When we were children, we didvided up things. "I'll do these, you do those". There it was. Later, though, it started changing. "You do these, because I won't". Quite a big difference to hear. It's like magic, Kiddo is going back to "I'll do these, you do those".
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
Doesn't have to be true. There's only one end, and the person writing it hasn't gotten there yet, unless Mr. Cash received the lyrics from an astral plane. So it has to be kinda like that "all you can drink" bar where they cut you off after two pitchers and tell you "that's all you can drink 'cuz it's all you're getting". The end is defined by the going away, in other words. Well, it's not everyone who goes away. And I could stop screwing her over, stop putting her in second place, start appreciating her. There are people who would say a womanizing junkie self-centered creep like me could never change like that, but those people don't realize that Mama is mamafying my life. Ooooh, it doesn't hurt. This morning we awoke, and I made a sound, a very subject-to-interpretation sound. Kiddo gives a worried sort of "huh?" and I said, "That wasn't pain."
You never know what tomorrow may bring.
Everyone I know goes away
In the end.
Doesn't have to be true. There's only one end, and the person writing it hasn't gotten there yet, unless Mr. Cash received the lyrics from an astral plane. So it has to be kinda like that "all you can drink" bar where they cut you off after two pitchers and tell you "that's all you can drink 'cuz it's all you're getting". The end is defined by the going away, in other words. Well, it's not everyone who goes away. And I could stop screwing her over, stop putting her in second place, start appreciating her. There are people who would say a womanizing junkie self-centered creep like me could never change like that, but those people don't realize that Mama is mamafying my life. Ooooh, it doesn't hurt. This morning we awoke, and I made a sound, a very subject-to-interpretation sound. Kiddo gives a worried sort of "huh?" and I said, "That wasn't pain."
You never know what tomorrow may bring.
Actually, Johnny didn't write that song but he sings it on the CD "When the Man Comes Around". That song was written by Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails and he was describing his addiction to cocaine. Johnny sings the same lyrics but the intent behind them is one of being over-medicated and hurt by those he trusted (like his abusive father). The "everyone goes away" refers, I think, to his older brother who died at age 14 and for which Johnny's father blamed Johnny.
BTW, I am not Johnny Cash or any member of his family LOL I look more like Elvis (no wonder I'm anxious and depressed).
Another paw wave from my Icepick to your Icepick. He'll catch you a nice mouse if you want.
When the Man Comes Around ....
BTW, I am not Johnny Cash or any member of his family LOL I look more like Elvis (no wonder I'm anxious and depressed).
Another paw wave from my Icepick to your Icepick. He'll catch you a nice mouse if you want.
When the Man Comes Around ....
I stopped talking to animals when Kitty said meow. Kitty, who is Little Bit, sez thanks, sez the silly hume doesn't have sense enough to enjoy a good mouse, but he'll take it. We don't have mice because of the snakes, I think the snakes control roaches too, because we have none of those either. Kitty wants very much to control the snakes, but they're our friends and I won't allow it.
Yah, I figured that wasn't JC, though I understand he's had his problems. I never did understand folks who shoot coke, I always preferred mine cooked up and on a pipe, anything else seemed a waste. I had plenty of friends in the alleyways of Aguadilla (callejones, we call them) with needles hanging out of their arm, one booted me up once and I know it was done right, but it just didn't have the flavor of a big hit off a pipe. I would never have guessed coke from the lyrics.
Gotta go. Gonna fix the Pickmobile. One of those big Jeeps, and she's beat the shocks out of it chasing drivers who've offended her. If they think grungy looking old bikers like me are a scary proposition, it's only because they've not yet enountered his road-raged 5 foot Puerto Rican ol' lady.
Actually, Kiddo wants me out of here. Says we're all "wallowing in our misery". I'll set her straight on that, but if she sees me neglecting her for here it will be harder. Gonna go do some mechanic's work.
I hope your day is going well, Ma'am.
Yah, I figured that wasn't JC, though I understand he's had his problems. I never did understand folks who shoot coke, I always preferred mine cooked up and on a pipe, anything else seemed a waste. I had plenty of friends in the alleyways of Aguadilla (callejones, we call them) with needles hanging out of their arm, one booted me up once and I know it was done right, but it just didn't have the flavor of a big hit off a pipe. I would never have guessed coke from the lyrics.
Gotta go. Gonna fix the Pickmobile. One of those big Jeeps, and she's beat the shocks out of it chasing drivers who've offended her. If they think grungy looking old bikers like me are a scary proposition, it's only because they've not yet enountered his road-raged 5 foot Puerto Rican ol' lady.
Actually, Kiddo wants me out of here. Says we're all "wallowing in our misery". I'll set her straight on that, but if she sees me neglecting her for here it will be harder. Gonna go do some mechanic's work.
I hope your day is going well, Ma'am.
Post a Comment