Whats going on with me?

This month has not been pleasant for me, my body is very sensitive to all the medications I take.
When I become physically ill, it has a big effect on the absorption rate of my medications and this can cause a handful of unwanted and unjustified emotions, This is what I  thought was happening to me

I always tend to over analyze things that are going on with my body or my mind.  When I started feeling mentally unwell,  it was during my medication changeover from the antidepressant Celexa to Zolft..   This occurred on the 11th day of being on zolft, so the chances of it being my medications were very slim.

  The feelings I had  affected me cognitively if I tried to engage in a conversation, in my mind I made perfect sense when I spoke it would not come to clear.

After sitting quietly and thinking and thinking about what could be causing this psychological or physical I felt it was physical.

The sensations somewhat reminded me of when my thyroid went out 3yrs ago. I remember that all too well! Over a week's time I had started word search, my memory was kind of bad and getting worse, I had a hyper sensation to touch I had no idea what was going on, so I went to the emergency room and they get all their tests they told me my thyroid had gone.  they didn't do anything for me they just packed me up and sent me home.

I had to find my own Endocrinologist.  Come to find out there's only one Endocrinologist within a 75 mile radius of me so in that department I are really had no choice but to take her as my Dr. She really hasn't told me very much about what's going on with me other than I have hypothyroidism right now I'm on(Levothyroxine sod 200mcg tab) as far as I know and feel everything is OK with my thyroid disease.

On the 22nd I went to the emergency room, because my primary care Dr. Was unable to see me the Dr. That took care of me was a Dr. Kelly, I've known him for a few years very good Dr. He always did good by me, on this visit he decided not to do a complete ER blood panel, which is mandatory.
He ordered chest X-ray, (I've always had chronic sinus infections do to 3 cysts in my sinus cavity).
He also felt that there was chest congestion, he gave me a antibiotics and also told me that my X-rays showed signs of emphysema.

  Now on a normal day that would have put me through the roof! My anxieties would take  total control.  But they did because I felt he still could not find what was causing the unwell feeling in my mind.

When I got home from a hospital I called my primary care Dr. and ask them to look in to this  (emphysema).  Well the Dr. go back to me and know I'd do not have (emphysema).
Which is great but hasn't solved anything, and still taking my antibiotics and my dose of zolft had been dropped from 50 mg to 25 mg per day, and will be increased some.
I have a story about a PCA that had been assigned to me what I was in the hospital I think tomorrow I will put that in my journal is infuriating my family is very upset I believe the girl lost her job and my brothers and sisters want me to sue.  I will fill you in on what took place but it will be tomorrow.

Then yesterday I had to go and see my urologist, for five years I have had a VeraSeale, most men know what that is but for anyone else I'd  look it up, and then I can easily tell you what it is a bit embarrassing it has to do with the Testicles and Epididymitis, usually they do not cause any problem with the vain broke in the tubes that run into the testie, that has caused the microscopic vein to swell with blood to the size of your finger, is very painful and embarrass but on this visit the urologist found in large mass hidden within the chords.  He has ordered a cat scan hopefully it's nothing it's not causing any anxiety that because I know that it's their so hopefully this can be taken care of with a small surgery and they'll be pain free!

Hope that wasn't too much to say in the journal? you know I want to start journaling more I want to meet more people, and make new friends.  That's one thing I miss the most is to have friends.

The people that I grew up with just turn their backs and walked away and that tends to make an individual very bitter and reluctant to search out and friendships for fear of not being accepted.

Well I'm not going to play the game anymore I want friends!