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Cutting for the first time

Aug 06, 2009 - 0 comments
Tags:

first time

,

cutting

,

OCD

,

sleep

,

food

,

feeling

,

better

,

dead

,

inside

,

eat



Well at 7am after taking a bath, I cut for the first time. It was twice on my left wrist. Right after that
I fell beyond happy. I could run a marathon. I wanted to sing show tunes, but I had to sleep because I had been awake for so long. When I woke up...I felt like I had died on the inside. After doing my chores I went back to sleep and didn't wake up until 8pm to eat. i barely ate, even though it was chinese food and went back to my room. I felt like I didn't have the motivation to move at all. I decided to go on Gaia and just look. My twiny Hime-chan IMed me and made me feel better. But Maiya had the brilliant Idea that I was feeling sad because my OCD wanted me to cut again so it would be even. But thanks to Maiya and Hime-chan I didn't need too. I wish I hadn't cut but...I might have to do it again.

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