Chit

Well today is the day before the big surgery to remove two tumors in my abdomen. I have been turned every which way but loose to get the surgery on the move. Needless to say they have turned me inside out. They found some blockage in my neck veins that might postpone the surgery. Actually I think they just want more money for more test etc. I feel horrible and don't give a damn about much of anything right now. Can't seem to knock the feeling off. The house is a mess, nothing organized like I wanted it to be for the hubby. The only way I can get this off my mind is to sleep, so I try to sleep all the time. I keep waiting to get a little more positive attitude but it just doesn't show up. I'm certainly glad we don't have a hand gun in the house.  Surgery is scheduled for noon tomorrow and I sure hope they go through with it so I can either call it the end or get home for recovery. At this point in time I don't care one way or the other. Sure could use a vicodin right now...lol...no just teasing, I don't ever want that **** again. I took a couple a few weeks ago and they made me sick so no more for me. I just want to be in recovery and be done with it.