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Broken Spirit
Sep 02, 2009 04:04PM
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Last night I cried for so long praying to God that he will fix me. It seems like everyone around me is getting their gifts but me. I feel less than a woman because of my infertility and it makes me question myself. I feel inadaquate and that I just have femine features but in actuallity I am something else. I guess I just feel hopeless and I don't want to give up on having a child. I know it can be a slow and long process but I'm almost 30 and everyone keep asking me when will I have a family. I'm to chicken to tell them that I have a problem conciving I don't want them to pity me. I'm not sure what else I can do I try not to think about and that works for a couple of months until one of my friends tell me their expectating. I'm happy for them but sad for me. Maybe it's just not my time. Paitence is a Virtue.
Oh boy do I know how you feel. I tried to conceive for over a year and it seemed like nothing was working. I was temping, I was using OPK's, I had an HSG done, I was using pre-seed, drinking pineapple juice, green tea, hanging upside down practically for at least 1/2 hour after sex, having sex every other day to make sure enough sperm was built up, checking my cervix, checking my cm, I was doing everything I could to get pregnant and nothing worked. I watched everyone around me get pregnant and it seemed so easy for them. I felt like such a failure. I used to apologize to my fiance and tell him I was sorry I couldn't give him a baby. Month after month of disappointment. I too was happy for my friends but sad for myself and angry when I would see pregnant women. The thing is, when I gave up on it all, that's when I became pregnant. Patience is a virtue, a very difficult one when you are trying to conceive but it will happen. I was 29 when I conceived and 30 when I had my son. I know it may not make you feel better but at least it may give you some hope. Good luck and sticky baby dust to you.
Patience, Relaxation, and Prayer is Everything!!!! Stress and anxiety are the demons. You might want to try meditation, yoga, or some herbal Chamomile tea Good LucK and May GOD Bless You =0) Never, Never, Never, Give Up!!!! ~ Sir Winston Churchill (1864 -1975)
much Love, much peace, much faith, much light....
<3 jimi (little wing =0) <3
much Love, much peace, much faith, much light....
<3 jimi (little wing =0) <3
You guys are both correct but it is so hard. Thanks for the encouraging words.
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