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Living with chronic pain,neck surgery,severe back pain!!!!

Sep 27, 2009 - 12 comments
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pains neck

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Back pain

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Chronic Pain

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Pain

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severe back pain

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Neck

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Back

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chronic

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neck surgery



Today is just another day of misery,My life has been put on stop!I've always been a very active person .At 40yrs old I was still playing with my sons,running,throwing a ball,anything!Now it's all gone I'm not able to even support my children ,I've thought of suicide twice ,but my faith is to strong to do it.So I just hang on,watching life go by and try to except my condition,It's very painfull!to stay this way.I really thought after surgery that I would be able to live my life without pain .But it's the opposite,it's hard ! I try to move on,but as soon as I try to do something ,my neck or back pain takes over,and I can't finish what I start,and that gets me upset! I usually keep it to myself.I broke-up my relationship of 3 good yrs.I felt guilty that I was not able to do what couples do like dancing,walking in the park or lake,I just didn't feel right that iI would not be able to work and support them.I really LOVED her and some times if you Love someone,you have to let her go,even though it hurts..I wanted her happy, she still is in my heart.But one must move on.I've been alone since my surgery 2004.There are days of  severe pain so I really don't have time to feel lonelyMy pain is my life,for now.The LORD has it's reason for my situation,I must go along and keep the Faith,I feel everything is for a reason.So I can not!will not give-up.  THANK YOU for your ears.  GOD BLESS US ALL!!!      P.S.A.

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by smokesmaid05, Oct 01, 2009
I  had back surgery in 2004. They operated on C2 through T1. They did laminectomies on C5, C6, levels. I still have a lot of pain to live with. I have aggressive osteo-arthritis and now have a large spur on the right side of C1 and a modreate spur on the left side of C1. I also have trouble in the thoracic spine and the lumbar spine. I have a lot of pain in the lumbar area. For the past 4 months I have horrible pan in my left ankle when I try to walk. I didn't have any feeling in my left leg until June of this year. I talked to my pain management doctor and he said that he can't do much more to help me and I will probably have to have more spinal surgery. I love to go out and take photos of nature. I just can't do it anymore. I still try but I pay for it the day after I was out. I also have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. I don't know what is causing the pain in my ankle but I hope someone will find out for me. I cannot work. I have bad problems with sleep. Sometimes I can't fall asleep until 7am and I am sleepy all day long. I can't even open a bottle of Gatorade! I have to sit on a counter stool to cook. I can't do housework like running the sweeper or dusting. Even loading the dishwasher gives me major spasms. I have front loading washer and dryer which is great. I don't have to stretch reaching down like the regular washer. I do the laundry but folding large items I have to have help. My in-laws don't believe I have pain. They can't understand why I would still have pain after surgery. It really makes things more difficult when people don't understand your condition. I have a Hoveround but when I have to go somewhere in the van I can't take the Hoveround with me. Insurance will cover the Hoveround but they will not pay for a lift or ramp so I can take it with me. It is great for getting around the house or our yard!
Relationships are more difficult. My husband is supportive but it took a while until he actually understood the extent of my pain. My relationship with my in-laws is practically non existant. My sister and daughter understand. My sister has back issues also. My daughter understands and at the age of 29 she also has back issues. She as herniated discs and osteo-arthritis, fibromyalgia and chronic pain syndrome.

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by stokesapab, Oct 02, 2009
My surgery was a very big surprise.I never complained of neck hurting me.My surgery was my C6-7 this is what they found. the study shows disc desiccation at this level.There is a broad-based protruding disc which totally effaces the thecal sac and causes a reduction in the AP dimension of the spinal cord at this level. This represents severe aquired spinal canal stenosis. The left neural foramen is slightly narrowed from osteophytes Now!  I had a myelogram in 2008 at Parkland Hospital in Dallas Tx. I keep getting sharp burning pain on my arms ,legs,all down my back,I swell up alot when I try to do anything,Driving hurts alot!This is what they found on my myelogram;C3-4 level shows very minimal central disc bulge..C4-5.shows a central disc herniation which indents the thecal sac with residual sac diameter 9mm..C5-6. minimal degenerative changes.. T8-9. a small central disc herniation without cord compression is seen minimal indenting the thecal sac,degenerative disc disease with herniation..T9-10.right posterior and lateral disc osteophyte complex is seen ,somewhat narrowing the right neural foramina without significant cord compression,degenerative disc disease with herniation..L4-5 shows a central and right foraminal disc herniation indenting the thecal sac  and right exiting nerve root.This causes moderate central stenosis with residual canal diameter of 7mm,degenerative disc disease in the lumbar spine causes moderate central canal stenosis..L5-S1 degenerative disc disease with loss of disc height and vacuum phenomenon is evident with likely  annular tear and fissure with air seen in the epidural space.This likely resents annular tear with disc herniation adjacent to the left exiting nerve for this level.And now 3 neurosurgeouns said there is nothing they can do for me. Now I don't know what to do ,it's very painfull having the pain and now that no one can help me,it gets very depressing,now I know what people with chronic pain go thru and it gets to you to where you do wonder about suicide,it really does!!I'm only 48yrs old!But we must all have Faith!!   Stay Strong! Believe!!  I've started to get involved in childrens rights.I did Lobby for a new Law,in behalf of a 4yr old little  beautiful girl .She now has her new Law in her name. The Janie Lynn DeLaPaz Act(Bill 176)is a new Law in the State of Texas.Careing for childrens safety and well being is everyones concern.                           May Our Lord Above Be With Us All...                             P.S.A.

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by jamie97, Nov 18, 2009
I also understand were you are coming from, I was born with kyphosis, had spinal fusiono and instrumentation, at T11 to L1, I have since had herniated disc at L5, have severe hip and right leg pain and my right side of my back is so  very painfull. I was also diagnosed with osteoarthritis and am waiting results of bone scan. I have three children and its very hard because I cant do many things even every day chores, I havent been able to work for almost 2 yrs now and my pain is increasing, I have tried precriptions, hyro water therapy, injections, chiropratic, and nothing has made my pain any better.

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by Shancard, May 22, 2010
Oh dear Lord stokesapab, I understand your pain. Sounds like you have severe stinoisis as well. They say surgery is the last resort for us living in Chronic pain. I've been there at the very lows of severe back and cervical pain. I have a wonderful husband who has been there not only for our children but for me when I couldn't have even cared for myself.

I have a wonderful surgeon who listens to what I say and hears, I mean really hears my struggles to maintain somewhat of a life. Back in Late January, he looked at me and and said there was a procedure that he was working on and at that time he called it the ball thing. He showed me the material and explained how it would work. He looked me in the eyes and said I can offer you a better quality of life. After 6 years of about being bed ridden and in severe pain, hey I was up for it. On February 10th 2010, I had the Eclipse Fusion done. It was my life saver and I have a much brighter life.

If you are interested in information about my surgeon please feel free to email me.

** Recently I was involved in a rear end collision. The surgery site and it's hardware remained intact and there was no further injury to C4 to C6 the levels I had the Fusion.**

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by finartsdir, Aug 02, 2010
By finartsdir aug 2010

I am glad I found this site. I had c4,5,and 6 fused in 2000. Everything I've read here sounds like me. Although the surgery stopped the intrusion on my spinal cord, I still have constant pain every day for the pas 10 years and sometimes it's so severe I have tears in my eyes and I can't function at all. I still suffer from myclonic jerking and have not been able to work do to prescription
drugs or just the pain.    I feel like a useless piece of crapp and have also contemplated suicide. I have had physical therapy,nerve blocks and burns, and have been on all types of narcotics that do nothing except make me sleep for awhile until their effect is through and then I wake up facing the pain once again. I am a burden and useless to everyone. I am 52 now and have a two year old daughter who knows daddy is always sick and can't play. What the hell is that. What's wrong with these doctors? I need my life back soon because I'm worthless to anyone I love or who needs me. I'm tired! Ten years tired!

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by hope2011JAG, Aug 21, 2010
Man can I relate to the post on 8/2/10.
I had a 3 level neck fusion surgery on 7/15 and am now at 6 weeks and not feeling any better than I was at 2 weeks. I am in so much pain, I now have numbness in my right upper arm and numbness in my right thigh that I never had before. I am also feeling useless and am afraid I will be unable to return to work in law enforcement. I am doing what ever the "professionals" tell me to do (ie physical therapy, walking, not smoking, etc). I thought by now I would be weening off the narc meds by now and just only working on the stiffness. The pain I have now is worse than before my surgery, I am only 42 and am upset that no one really understands my pain, it took me forever to ever find this blog.

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by MrMachine, Oct 17, 2010
Hey people , let me tell ya I am there with every f***king one of you !!! My life ***** ... I blew three disks c5-6 was the one that was the worst ...... or so that is what they told me ...... boy was that a big f***king mistake . Sorry for so many f-bombs but I know that every one of you , if you feel like I do, want to F***KING SCREAM!! I have been to so many doctors and I swear to god every goddamn one of them tell me something different. I have had every f***king proceedure that they through at me , physical therapy ,steriod injections, epidoral , facette joint injections , x-rays , ct scans , mri , blood test's up the *** and after almost two years and 7 ( yes , i said 7) surgeries two steel plates and four screws I am still in agony ....so much so that I just had another "proceedure " done this week . And to my utter disbelief I am in more pain than when I went in on wednesday . So i guess I have the same question on my mind just like everyone of you have ......WHAT THE F**K NOW !!
  I am in the same boat as most of you ,2 kids 9and 12 both into sports , used to coach my son in baseball , can't even throw a ball now , sit on the couch ...........AND I HATE SITTING ON THE COUCH !!!!!!!!!  ...I was a constuction worker now i don't have a job.... , cant do construction if you cant pick up your tools or build , or drive to get to work .....
   The last two years has been one long F**king nightmare ....... I hate to say it but there will never be another day when you will feel normal ever again...... I live on pain meds and bottles of advil ....none of which work they just make it tolerable to a certain degree.   All i can say is good luck to all of you...... and if ya need to scream your *** off and want to cuss at some one I'll stop into this site  and we will yell at each other ....... cause I can say that no-one and I mean no-one understands this F**king pain like us poor bastards who are in here looking for some F**king answers as to why we are in the agony that we are in . So people good F**king luck to ya all .

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by pain85, Nov 28, 2010
IM 43 &BEEN PLASTERER FOR 25YRS.C2THRUC7 R WORN OUT THEY SAY
THREE SURGEONS SAID THEY CAN'T OPERATE
TO DANGEROUSWOULD END UP CRIPPLE AM TOO YOUNG FOR THIS
CAN'T WORK AGAIN THAT IS VERY HARD
HELP ANYONE KNOW IF OPERATING WOULD HELP
C2-C3 R COMPLETELY GONE
ARTHRITIS IS FORMING ON C6-C7
ENTIRE NECK IS ALWAYS IN PAIN
HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111


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by Jrsygrl109, Nov 28, 2010
Yep - I'm in the same boat as you all.  Had l4-l5 fusion done for bi-lateral recess stenosis and spinal stenosis. Then my neck was fused c4 - c6 for severe instability, then i was injured at work and ended up with a blown disk at l3-l4 and l1-l2.  There are times that I feel utterly useless.  I'm 49 years old and have been in chronic spinal pain since I was 19 years old.  Now it is so bad that I am out of work and waiting for the SSA to approve my application.  Funny - on the 2nd application they didn't even look at my doctors reports - two orthopedic (one world-renown spinal surgeon, one workermans comp) said I was 100% disabled, pain management doc says i'm disabled because of my failed back and failed neck surgery. My pysch says I'm getting more and more depressed.  I too hate sitting in the recliner, 3/4 reclined ALL DAY LONG. but I know if I go outside and attempt any kind of gardening or yard work I will suffer even more (lvl 8 - 9 pain) for a week or more. Can't do much shopping using my electric scooter - basket is too small and I hurt too much by the end of the trip.  I'm grateful for my son who is 23 years old and comes home on his weekendsand helps with food shopping, getting stuff out of the attic, etc. but he will be getting his own place come January so he is closer to school and work so I guess my food shopping will be limited to wawa or quick chek.  The pain killers really don't work anymore - I know I need to do a detox and suffer in bed for two weeks in utter pain to clean out my system and reset it so that the meds will be more effective but I just absolutely dread the first three days. Life does suck for those of us who live in pain but I guess in the end we juist need to not define ourselves by our pain and limitations even tho society does. . .

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by jaybird1959114, Dec 16, 2010
@ PSA, I know your pain.Ive been working hard all my life.Ive worked everything from oilfields-busboy.When i turned 41 is when all my troubles started,I was in the millitary,mattied ,working 40 -90 hrs a week.Then one day i hurt my back at home,tore all my lower muscles and wound up in bed for 6 month's. after that it just became one thing after another,from aug. 03 too may 04 i had 2 neck surgery's,an R shoulder.in 06 was a nissen and gullblatter.then came 08. two more C-spine surgery's 3 month's apart front and back.C-3 thru C-7.I havent worked in 2 yrs,My Darling wife of almost 25 yrs. stay's whith me.I thought my life was over too.PLEASE dont give up. and what you said about theres a reason? I beleve in that too, im like you just waitin too see.All any one can say is keep up the good battle.I fight EVERYDAY too just do what i can. it's taken a while but im finley learning how too do some stuff over again.Just take ur time and you will see,God be whith you and god bless. M.J.G

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by jaybird1959114, Dec 16, 2010
@ pain 85,I have c-3 thru c-7 have plate in front and rods and pins in the back,osteoparosis got the bone after they did the front,3 month's later i was back under the knife again having the back done.There is one thing I learned from all this ,when you have sugery on your spine the problem moves UP! Ineed the front plate removed because thetissue build up around it is choking me.If you have a great neuologist,ask him about the rods and screws for the back of the C-spine first,then see how it feels after that.I have too tell you tho the PAIN will NEVER go away,jus the intensity of it.I hope you get at ease in ur pain. Knowledge is power, so dont be afraid too ask Other Doctor's about it.If you can I would ask other Doc.'s like in VANDERBUILTNasville TN.,NORTON'S HOSPITAL,LOUISVILLE<KY,they cant shoot you for tryin too find a difrent opinion.Good Bless you SIR!

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by barefoot71, Apr 13, 2011
I thought I was the only one! I had C-3 through C-7 fused 2010 I had C-3 through C-5 done in January then they had to go in take the plate off and put another from C-5 through C-7 in December 2010. I'm tired of hurting and I'm tired of pain pills. I've been on the pain pills for almost 2 years, this is so stupid. I miss my life! I sometimes wish I didn't have the first surgery because now it seems like my whole neck and back is going. I wish I would have found this site earlier. My prayers are with all of you! I understand when you say sometimes you feel like commiting suicide, when your hurting and nothing seems to help. I really have to stop and think is the pain worth my family? I had a son that commited suicide and I think that is the reason I can't do it.

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