Jun 20, 2008
I am so down right now, my spirit is not as usual. I feel very alone and not so positive today. I'm all but 31 and I don't know what this spells out for me & my life. It's robbing me at this point, I've been knocked down for some reason. I need my positve thinking back and my spirit. But I am scared....
I spent yesterday evening in the ER again, this time with an odd rash on one arm, b/p was higher than it's ever been, it was 188/118, my left leg was swollen, my hands, arms, and now feet are getting the pins & needles sensation with the numbness. I called my doctor and they said to go to the ER. So, I did- I was told there that I need to see my Internal Med doc within 2 days. It looked like a Lupus rash possibly, other test on kidneys and electrolites were good, and some other test were ran and the info was sent to my doctor. I already have a check-up booked for Thursday, I am just going to wait until then. The ER sent me home with a diagnoses paper saying "Fibromyalgia and Paresthesia. Please follow up with specialist as soon as possible and when making appointment please tell them the ER referred you..."
I've also started this jerking thing and I feel like I am shaking on the inside, my hands have a tremble. I feel really odd. I don't know what this is!!! I've noticed I am losing some cordination, I guess thats what you call it. It's hard to write on here or send emails, I make so many mistakes, and mispell so much or leave out words.
I am so scared... my days feel like they are slipping away from me. I want my positive attitude back and my determination, my safe feelings and just some peace of mind.
God please hear my prayers, I I need some comfort and peace. I need some good feelings to return, just long enough to get my spirits back up. I feel so alone and scared, please hear me.