how this started

I never has PMS or fibroids or endometriosis or cysts and thought i was lucky

when my periods stopped i cried b/c i thought it was perimenopause
when my fam practitioner thought i was pregnant i was elated
when the nurse called back and changed me to perimenopause
i missed my ability to conceive
if i had known it was my last period i would have celebrated it
when the ultrasound said cysts on ovaries i was shocked
when i thought for sure i was gonna loose my ovaries i cried (but not for long)
ten minutes later i wanted them GONE to harm me no more
when the doc called them tumors i got sad then realized theres nothing to worry about until they tell  me to worry

all these emotions took place over only two days


i hugged my doc today and said it was okay she thought i was pregnant because
if i lacked xray vision and felt those things inside i would have thougt the same thing
she hugged me back and smiled and said its gonna be okay (i believe her)

i talked to my shrink today and he said med help forums will help empower me with knowledge

i talked to my good friend today and it gave me hope
i talked to God today it gave me peace
i had a med help post answered today and it gave me courage :)

i am not dx with ca unless the onc tests the tumors or cysts or whatever and says its positive so i cam trying to think positively

... LMP 4/30/2008

TVUS 10 cm complex cyst on one side and 5 cm on the other

CT scan showed bilateral complex "adenoma" unknown if it is OVCA (6/23/08) ... will see gyn at MUSC soon with a hopefully brilliant gyn onc

CA-125 results is 126

my gyn said the two tumors combined resemble a 4 month pregnancy and estimates about 16 lbs ... no wonder i felt lousy

taking percocet for pain really took the edge off tremendously

family hx

Aunt Alice had a 20 lb ABD tumor in early 1990's unknown if OVCA because ladies from her generation did not discuss such things Aunt Alice is gone now

Sister Laurie had complete BSO with two recurrences of OVCA (interestingly she doesnt have ovaries and her ca keeps coming back) ... i am new at this so i can only say that they are doing the thing where they put the chemo directly into her peritoneum (too bad she wont talk to me about it I love her and pray for her ... she doesn't know about me)

I am .......
42 yo female hx infertility and miscarriage preemie babies major depression high cholesterol high bp anxiety and military sexual trauma PTSD military asbestos exposure
Married 22 years to a wonderful southern gentleman
dynamite 19 yo college student daughter
strong/smart 15 yo son
cute as a button 10 yo daughter

but u know i am more .. i am still a daughter and a mom
i am also a sister who begged all of her female relatives to run not walk to their gyn and get a TVUS ASAP 6/24
(my mom's 76 and sad about two of her daughters and LOL totally blames dad for his bad genetics ... he's 80)

i am still a mom who is considerig BRCA testing for her daughters due to family history and beg you all to do the same