Only been 54 hours

      It's only been 2 days since I have been without Ultrams. It feels like 2 weeks. Took ANOTHER hot bath. Took 2 600 Ibuprofen today. Of course I felt no relief. I HATE Ultrams!!!! Or should I say that I hate that I liked them? Dear husband rented movies he knew I'd like. Too bad I can't sit through either one of them. I can't consentrate. I did do dishes! I couldn't do ANYTHING yesterday. It kindof feels better when I'm doing something. Husband made me go over to father-in-laws today for about 20 minutes. I think I felt better, but then it's hard to feel things the "right" way.       I know that I'm not really able to feel any joy or humor right now. IT *****!!!!  I really love to laugh. I've been reading other peoples entries about dealing with Ultram. And I have to say that most of it doesn't make me feel optamistic about my immediate future. I feel horrible now, I can't imagine feeling worse. Everyone is saying that days 3 and 4 are the worst. If it gets worse I think that I might end up in the ER!! I'm just not looking forward to anyone I know, knowing that I'm addicted to something. I don't care so much for myself, it's my children.                                   It's about 230 in the morning and I know it's gonna be another sleepless night. Such long hours. hours that feel like days. days that are feeling like weeks. My neck is killing me and my face is kinda numb. It's feeling like my muscles want to jump out of my body. Why is it so much worse during the night hours?