Well, they're all going without me...

Its really sad that you never really got to finish your teen years before becoming a mother.  I ache for all the teen moms I see at work.

Damn, being a grown up, or rather being a parent, ***** sometimes. Please use this experience to help remind other young women that being a mom isn't all sunshine and bubbles.

On a somewhat similar note, I was pregnant with my oldest son on my 23rd birthday. My adopted mom called and was excited to bring me a cake (last individual cake I received consequently) and a gift. I was thrilled! She shows up with a homemade cake (nice, but she used to get me DQ ice cream cakes) and a big box, I was so excited until I opened it and found a car seat...for MY birthday. What a let down. But it was a good lesson: My life no longer mattered, it was all about that baby.

Yep.. It just upset me that she didn't even mention my grandma or Riley's father wataching him, so I could go. She just straight up said "we're going to cedar point" I got a little excited, admittedly. Then she says my sister is going, too. I thought, oh cool I don't see her that often. Then she says "You can have Joey stay here with you if you want." And suddenly I was like "oh"... Didn't quite see that coming, but I should have. Kinda messed up. Reminds me of like when I would leave for a couple days or go to my dad's in WV, they would go out to eat or the movies. Maybe it was all coincidence but I eventually got the feeling that they didn't like me.... :-/ LOL
But whatever..

mabye im not getting this but...why cant you go. why cant you go with like riley.
i dont kno what ceder point is. or where it is for that matter but why cant you go.

Swampy remembers being in Cambridge, it was a favorite stop off point except Ohio hasn't seen the light and still lets people smoke in too many places.

Trust old Swampy on this one -- in a few years (which is, quite simply, a short amount of time), you'll be able to go with your child to Cedar Point. You will have a great time with each other.

Having a child doesn't change what experiences you will have, it changes when you will have them.

i agree with swampcritter.... it may feel like you are missing out on some pretty cool stuff right now, but trust me, you will get to do all of that in time. cherish what you have right now. i know its disappointing sometimes, we all know how you feel, im sure we've all had to miss out on a thing or 2 due to either being pregnant, or having kids already. its a part of life... and its not the last time you will miss out on something. celebrate the fact that you and your son have the whole house to yourself... im sure that doesnt happen very often.

genius words swampy.  maybe your mom is trying to show you what having a baby does to your life.  grandma shouldnt have to babysit for such a trip.  im confused why you cant go WITH riley, but that is your moms decision.  when teens have babies it changes in a way they cant comprehend at first.  they see a cute baby on tv or in the store and think "ahhh i want one!".  then they do.  crying, fussing, not eating, exploding poop, no sleep and well you know what i mean.  i think your mom is probably trying to teach you that with a baby comes a certain responsibility.  you have your entire life to take trips, to go with or without your child, but right now you need to be with your son and he needs you.  

have his father come help you out, enjoy the time you have alone with your child.  you might learn a thing or two without the interference of your own parents or siblings.  its ok really, you will be able to do whatever you want later in life, for now its motherhood. learn to embrace it and love it because someday i promise you will so miss these times.

Well, you know it's not like I don't know how much it has changed my life. She knows that I know this, too, we talk about it sometimes.. Or I do when I'm feeling upset of some of the different aspects of how much harder it will be now. I can't take Riley with me because it's an amusement park, with roller coasters and such, and he's only  a month old...And I don't know, I just don't know if I'll be able to take him places like that being a young single mother I doubt I'll have the money to.
swampcritter - this town *****. I don't see how it could be anyone's favorite! Hah.
pertykitty - You know, I wasn't one of those girls who thought it would be all play all the time. I didn't have this starry eyed vision of what motherhood would be like so it's not like  I'm crushed in realizing that I can't go and have fun when I want to. And I KNOW he needs me... I don't think my mom would be 'teaching me a lesson' as I've said, I KNOW these things already...
I don't know...
I just simply can't help but to be bummed out about it. my family is not the type to go places together and  I've been trying to push them to get the initiative and everything to do something as a family TOGETHER for YEARS and now finally when they want to, I'm excluded. Because I have a kid.. I UNDERSTAND all of this, but it just doesn't have to be that way. She never even TRIED to see if there was any way I could be a part of the family on this trip.. So I guess I kind of felt a little unwanted. As stupid as it may be to you...
It's not all about having to be here to take care of MY baby, I don't mind that. I even mentioned to Riley's father, those same points. Having the house and the quiet and alone time with my son. But they're still my family too. I just feel singled out. But I guess you're right that I deserve it. I'm the only one to blame for getting myself in this situation. Not my mom, or my grandma, or anyone else.

I dont think you should be left out of family events, even if you do have a child....a mom needs a break every once in a while regardless of age.  If you are just going on a day trip to an amusement park, I dont see any harm in asking the baby's father or your grandma to watch him for the day.  I have only done that once so far to have a day trip of shopping with my friends....I think it is well deserved to do every once in a while and since your family never does this, then why should you be left out.  Maybe bring it up to your mom, maybe she thinks you wouldnt even want to go or that you dont want family time...as many teens dont.  So maybe she just doesnt see your side of it.

She should have been able to tell I wanted to... And she knows I'm not like that. She knows I want to do things with them. and especially by how excited I was at first..... But I wasn't invited. I feel like if I'm unwanted I'm not going to even push the issue. It just hurts.. :/
I really feel she's doing this intentionally. Although I don't know why. Maybe she still secretly resents me for all of this. I guess I can't blame her it just seriously makes me feel like ****. It's things like these that happen that keep me depressed.

Besides, what kind of parent simply disregards their child's feelings when totally leaving them out of the picture?

I haven't read all of the posts; only a few.  I know that you feel hurt and left out.  I can certainly understand.  I know this had been hard on you.  I agree with babyscience, that moms need a day out sometimes.  And there wouldn't be any harm in someone watching Riley for the day.  I also understand how you feel about not wanting to "invite yourself".  But I have learned a lot over the past year about thinking that so many people in my life "should" know and understand how I feel about certain events that have happened to me and my family over this past year.  These people that I am referring to are my family and people that I think would know me pretty well seeing as how they have known me my whole life.  I am learning that sometimes people just have to be told; even when we think they should already know.

I would like to make a suggestion though that is kind of OT but not.  You mentioned about being a single parent and not being able to afford this for you and Riley later on.  I suggest you thinking long and hard right now about what you want to do in the future.  Maybe you have.  IDK....That's why I am saying this.  When you are doing something to make a situation better.....When you are taking charge and taking control, it is very empowering.  And I am only telling you this because I was in your shoes when I was 17.  I just turned 33 and have struggled all of these years.  Maybe you want to be a nurse.  Maybe you want to be an u/s technician.  IDK.....But I would just think about it and start taking steps to go toward that goal and you will feel so much better and you will know that Cedar Point is in your future with Riley.  And you will know that you will be able to afford it without anyone else's help.  And the day you go there with Riley and pull out your wallet, you will remember how you are feeling right now and just smile.  Maybe I sound stupid.  Maybe this sounds just a bit deep right now.  But take it from 1 single young mother (at 1 time) to another.......This I know.  I hope you don't take any of that wrong, because maybe you already know what you want to do and maybe you are already working towards it.  I don't know and I just wanted to give that advice because I know exactly how you feel.

I hope you feel better soon.  If you ever need anything, I am always here.  Take care......

She may be doing it intentionally or she may have realized it's just not a place for a newborn. But remember this, you are the baby's mother. If you're comfortable enough, get a babysitter, and go along to the amusement park! Have fun!!! You've been having a hard time since he's been born, you NEED a break. It's okay to want and need a break from your baby. You may feel guilty at some point but you also need to have YOU time. So I think you should go and have fun! See if a trustworthy girlfriend (at this age I'd have at least 2 people watching my baby) would take care of Riley and go have some fun, relax, get rejuvenated. When you get back, you'll realize how much you missed Riley and will be ready to get back into your Mommy Pants.

Joy, I already said, though, that I simply was not invited. She didn't even bring it up as an option... I would love to do that.... I agree with you.

Michele, Katy, TX - I have no idea how to  get where I want to go. I know what you're saying and I couldn't agree more... I wanted to be a nurse but that kind of got all screwed up... long story. No thanks to my mom. I had big plans.. But she helped me in totally wrecking them. NO I'm not trying to be a typical teenager and blame my mistakes on my parents, there is way more to that with what happened.. Which is why I said it's a long story.
Anyways... I do agree.. I'm just afraid that I won't be able to get there... I have no idea what to do or where to turn at this point in my life, when it comes to jobs/careers/education.

my family is very close so 3 weeks after i had my son my aunt literally came to my house and started packing his things together and said he was going to spend the weekend with her while i went to our yearly 4th of july trip to see stock/drag racing....i was so excited but when i got there i had no fun at all! all i did was worry and i literally cried myself to sleep that night at the hotel because i hated leaving him behind......he is now 2 years old and he has only went to spend the night with anyone 3 times since then......i have really big trust issues when it comes to my son.....even though everyone i know has raised a perfectly healthy child, the only one i would trust with my son is one of my aunts and she lives 10 hours away! i was 20 when i got preggo and alot of people told me i was making a mistake....but i never did want to go to college...my life long dream has always been to be a mommy and wife and thats all that really mattered to me and now that i have that i would never trade it for the world! there are going to be times when you would like to just pull your hair out or just give up all together and then you'll realize that if you weren't meant to be in the position you are in now then GOD would have never allowed it....then that will make you feel even better to know that GOD chose you to do exactly what you are doing! best wishes!!!!

Ohhh, bummer! I guess all I could say at this point is you could tell her, "Hey, if you don't mind I'd love to come spend the day with you! I have a babysitter ready for Riley and I just really need a break to re-group." She just may say yes, or she could say not this time. But I completely understand about feeling rejected (it's my middle name... okay, not really...).

As for what Michele offered in advice for a career, there are online courses. Your first step would be to speak with a representative from an online education facility. Make sure they're accredited, of course. Anyway, they'll hook you up with the information you need about getting financial aid and/or scholarships/grants. More than likely you'll be approved for the financial aid and voila! You'll be on your way to getting a career. Just take things one step at a time or you'll start to get overwhelmed and upset.

Oh, and you could also check out www.occupationaloutlookhandbook.com (well, it may be .org instead, so just try it and see!). You can look up different kinds of nursing or careers, see what type of education you'd need, how much money you'd make, etc.

I'm not sure how much longer you have of High School.  You may want to see if there is any way that you can graduate early??  But if not, I would concentrate on that first.  But even while doing that, I would do what Joy suggested.  There are so many grant programs out there just especially for people like you.  There are all types of programs out there for careers.  Many of them have very convenient hours in the evenings, weekends, etc.  And many of these programs will provide child care.  Here in Houston, I have heard that certain community colleges even provide day care on campus.  You may want to speak to your guidance counselor at school.  You may also want to check into your local community college and speak to a counselor there.  Hopefully 1 of those people will at least be able to give you some input and guidance.  Joy also had some good sites that you may be able to check out.

I know that you probably feel a bit overwhelmed right now and maybe even scared.  But you are so much stronger than you realize.  I saw that during your pregnancy.  You are wise beyond your years.  Infact, that's why you feel the way you do.  Once you bring a baby into the world, it's like everything changes.  You see things in an entirely different way.  You see things through the eyes of a mother.  And you just want what is best for Riley and just aren't sure how to make that happen.  That's what every mother wants and feels.

We are all here if you need us.  I do think you will feel better once you look into some of these things.  You will begin to see light at the end of the tunnel.  You have a ways to go, but with the strength that I KNOW you have, you will get there.