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slept in

Mar 16, 2010 - 0 comments
Tags:

Bipolar

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bi polar

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Depression

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Major Depression

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depressed

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manic

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manic depression

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odc

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Relationships

,

Break ups



last night my 3 yr old didnt go to bed till 2 am....well, i put him in be, but he didnt fall asleep till 2, asking for anything to procrastinate going to bed! i was beyond frustrated, not to mention tired! i finally had to ignore him till he fell asleep on the floor & then put him in bed, so he woke up at like 12 30 today....me too! i felt like shite for sleeping so long, but it actually turned into a semi productive day after all.

it was close to 60*, the sun was out & i opened the windows and sent the kids to the neighbors to play, so i was totally alone (which never happens mind you) to do some laundry and dishes. menial, i know, but at least i did something besides lounge and sleep on the couch or sit online all day long.

im pretty depressed about d leaving.  :( i wish sometimes that things turned out differently, but we may never be together again, i hate saying that because he is a huge part of me being who i am and he has always been the one to love and accept me for me, just the way i am. i mean, my friends do too, but he was the only BF that did, flaws and all. hes a very special person to me, and sometimes i think about the what ifs and the wish i hads, but i cant change that now. it is better for him health wise to be back there, but a piece of my hear is leaving with him, and will always be with him. he changed my life. and i hate him for leaving, but i really dont hate him, just that hes going and theres nothing i can do to change that. it just all *****, but we cant be just friends. we are too close for that,and if we are physically together in the same place, we cant be just friends. ever. my baby is leaving and it hurts. ill always think of him as mine.

other than that issue, looking forward to going to see coheed play next tues, as well as getting my next sitting on my tattoo...more color on the snakes on madusas hair...painful spots too, but i want this to be perfect for short sleeve season, lol. its looking amazing already! i love my tattoo artist, hes a great dude, and i appreciate his work and everything he put into this one for me.

now off to put the kids to bed...fun.

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