Remembering Angels!

As I sit here looking at my christmas tree...Hubby is at work...so I'm all alone. I look at that teddy bear ornament that reads "lil angel". I set and wonder what it would be like. As of this christmas my child would be 6 months old. I know everything happens for a reason and god will bless us one day, but I just don't understand why this had to be so hard for us! Having a miscarriage is one of the hardest thing that I have every been through.. It has gotten a little easier, but there is not a day that I don't think about my baby. This would have been the first christmas for it...and it's kind of hard, just thinking of what I'd be doing right now. I wouldn't be lonely! I would be enjoying every minute of being a mother. I would have had twice as many present to wrap....and seeing the joy on my stepsons face of getting to share christmas with a sibling instead of by himslef... Well I pray for all of us that the holidays will get better and we will have something to look forward to in the future. The only thing that has came good out of my fertility problem is that it is making me stronger..as a woman and as a mother one day. I learned not to take  things for granted!  It's not always going to be there. Cherish everyone and everything! Well good luck to everyone...Merry Christmas!