Is "a little bit" enough to tell who you are?
Jul 18, 2008 08:25AM
- 2 comments
Who am I? Who am I to others? To me, I'm just this regular woman who goes from day to day, curious about what tomorrow will bring. It is a little strange to think about it - to me I just feel like this totally normal girl who doesn't fit into the 27 year lived. I drink my coffee, I have this nasty habit of sleeping those 6 minutes longer in the morning and race off just in time to get my clothes changed to a medium sized uniform which to others should signalize who I am... Or is it who I want to be that it signalizes?
A lot of questions! I'm a mother to a 5 year old girl - 5 years, that's the age when my memories are starting to come up about myself. Is she as tender as I was? Does she feel like she has a mother or does she feel that mom is someone that makes promises and breaks them with a "but hon, it's better another time..." ...?
If I look at myself yet again, I see someone who eagers to do the right thing at the right time. I react when things I say aren't heard. The things that I speak of aren't said for no reason. If I had no reason, I'd be silent about it. Obviously.
Not more than a few weeks ago, there was a tragic accident at one of the Norwegian festivals. Many were injured and got hospital care while two died of CO2 intoxication. You hear about these accidents and react. In a few hours, the tragedy is more distant and someone even forgets that there were persons immediately touched by it.
To this tragedy with the bus, the CO2 intoxication, I did too just read the headlines and walked on. It touched me deeply for a while - maybe because my mother died that way too? Then after two weeks, with a new tragedy at one of the amusement parks in Sweden this whole scenario came back (there were "only" injuries and no deaths in that accident). How do we really react when we hear of someone touched by these tragedies? Do we just go on like nothing happened, like it won't ever happen to us? I don't.
"When someone are touched by grief this way, we need to be sensitive and careful, yet warm."
That's who I want to be to others. If I only can give that much and not wear out, that's who I can be.
Working at a nursing home, that's who you get a chance to be. But you must be able to close the door behind you and go home and keep it to that.
One of the greatest challenges I have noticed with myself is that nursing homes aren't the same as acute care. At the ambulance you transport, you give immediate aid and you make sure that the face of health care that they meet in the first instance is a face that gives comfort and trust to the rest of the system. You say good bye and you know that you might never meet the same person again.
At a nursing home you have continuity. You will meet the same patients day after day .... and my greatest fear is: They'll take too much advantage of it, of me. I can't give a whole hand if I have only one finger. I can't easily draw back because tomorrow is a new day.
Do I go on as if this will never happen to me? Nope. I have plans of living a loooooong life. The day I need a place at a nursing home I am going to be happy to have someone that cares.
Oh well, a whole lot of venting!
A lot of questions! I'm a mother to a 5 year old girl - 5 years, that's the age when my memories are starting to come up about myself. Is she as tender as I was? Does she feel like she has a mother or does she feel that mom is someone that makes promises and breaks them with a "but hon, it's better another time..." ...?
If I look at myself yet again, I see someone who eagers to do the right thing at the right time. I react when things I say aren't heard. The things that I speak of aren't said for no reason. If I had no reason, I'd be silent about it. Obviously.
Not more than a few weeks ago, there was a tragic accident at one of the Norwegian festivals. Many were injured and got hospital care while two died of CO2 intoxication. You hear about these accidents and react. In a few hours, the tragedy is more distant and someone even forgets that there were persons immediately touched by it.
To this tragedy with the bus, the CO2 intoxication, I did too just read the headlines and walked on. It touched me deeply for a while - maybe because my mother died that way too? Then after two weeks, with a new tragedy at one of the amusement parks in Sweden this whole scenario came back (there were "only" injuries and no deaths in that accident). How do we really react when we hear of someone touched by these tragedies? Do we just go on like nothing happened, like it won't ever happen to us? I don't.
"When someone are touched by grief this way, we need to be sensitive and careful, yet warm."
That's who I want to be to others. If I only can give that much and not wear out, that's who I can be.
Working at a nursing home, that's who you get a chance to be. But you must be able to close the door behind you and go home and keep it to that.
One of the greatest challenges I have noticed with myself is that nursing homes aren't the same as acute care. At the ambulance you transport, you give immediate aid and you make sure that the face of health care that they meet in the first instance is a face that gives comfort and trust to the rest of the system. You say good bye and you know that you might never meet the same person again.
At a nursing home you have continuity. You will meet the same patients day after day .... and my greatest fear is: They'll take too much advantage of it, of me. I can't give a whole hand if I have only one finger. I can't easily draw back because tomorrow is a new day.
Do I go on as if this will never happen to me? Nope. I have plans of living a loooooong life. The day I need a place at a nursing home I am going to be happy to have someone that cares.
Oh well, a whole lot of venting!
Sweetie,
You know the thing in life is that we wear a whole lot of different hats. We are alway who we are at the core. But we are different people to different people. You are touching someone life every day, in one way or another. But especially you. Look at all the wonderful things you do! You don't give yourself enough credit! I know that! I pray for someone just like you ever the day should come I need emergency services or the day I go to a nursing home! The trouble is there aren't enough yous in the world! Hopefully one day there will at least be more like you! Sadly there will always be those rotten apples that come along and abuse the sick & elderly. But, all we can do is do our best to make a positive change for the future!
Much Love,
momeluv
You know the thing in life is that we wear a whole lot of different hats. We are alway who we are at the core. But we are different people to different people. You are touching someone life every day, in one way or another. But especially you. Look at all the wonderful things you do! You don't give yourself enough credit! I know that! I pray for someone just like you ever the day should come I need emergency services or the day I go to a nursing home! The trouble is there aren't enough yous in the world! Hopefully one day there will at least be more like you! Sadly there will always be those rotten apples that come along and abuse the sick & elderly. But, all we can do is do our best to make a positive change for the future!
Much Love,
momeluv
I wished you worked at the nursing home my mom is in. It is so sad to see what goes on there. Be proud of what you do. Not just anyone can do what you do. Thank you for posting this. sara
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