I wanna suicide... more or less

First thought this morning... after spoken with Andrew this thought was worst.... I wanna live but I can't live without him and he's too far now... too far to understand... too far to be here... I don't want that he brokes up with me... I can't do nothing now, why he doesn't understand... I can't live without him...

After a lexton it's a bit better, but still crying... I wanna be alone... I'm in the dark.... who has turned off the light????? Give me a chance to be happy, come here and give me a bit of love... I only ask love...

Yesterday I hadn't lunch or dinner, smoked 25 cigarettes and drunk a Cola, I didn't go to work today because I'm not in the right state.... after crying all yesterday and all the night...

I'm tired of the life!!!