Eager to know but also confused

Well, it's possible that i could be pregnant but have yet to do a pregnancy test. Thing is, my damn cycles are irregular, which means its harder to decide when the best day is to carry it out. On average my cycle is 30 days and im on day 32 now. the maximum it usually is is 33 so if my period does not arrive then..its test time!

Actually right now i feel a little light-headed and sickly...head also hurts a bit. As well as the ever present cramping like my period is about to say 'Hello!' but doesnt. Oh and the tiredness...had a reletively good sleep last night but it feels like i havent slept at all. Though im probably not as tired as my partner. He got up for work this morning feeling incredibly tired. He said he kept needing the toilet during the night...i joked by saying maybe HE is pregnant. As long as he's fit and healthy; he's such an important man in my life...in fact THE most important man in my life.

He got me a hot water bottle last night to help the cramping pain, which was also in my back as well as my lower abdomen. Wasnt overall hugely painful but it was enough to make me feel nauseous.

If I am pregnant then i know i am young to be a mother. By the time i have the baby i will be 20 and a HUGE responsibility will be on my hands. My partner is 26 and looks forward to having a family. He's explained to me that he'll be there no matter what and even if we became parents now rather than later we would still get through.

What concerns me most if i am pregnant is the fact that i get a lot of UTI's. I have no idea why they keep recurring but they always get me down. Antibiotics are not good during pregnancy and i am worried i will not be able to get it treated effectively. When i dont have a UTI i just get discomfort in my urethra. Because of that its sometime extremely uncomfortable to have sex. That brings my mood down even more because all i want is to feel normal again. Ive forgotten what it was like to have sex normally without any discomfort.
Lack of sex hasnt affected our relationship which im pleased about. James (my partners name) is just happy to curl up on the couch and watch tv with me...as long as i am there he's content.

Also, if i am pregnant and have the baby, i really want to breastfeed. Again i'll be worried ill get a UTI and have to be on antibiotics and then not be able to breastfeed my baby....generally im more worried about getting another UTI than giving birth (though after i experience childbirth i might change my mind)....it works psychologically, see. Cause i know that nothing good comes from a UTI. Those nasty blighters that are E.Coli bacteria just want to destroy the cells in your bladder...and that thought makes me cringe...not many things do. The pain of giving birth will be better to me because i know why i am going through it and know ill have a beautiful baby at the end of it.

Well, best not worry about anything (apart from UTI's) until i get the test and it comes up postive.

Until then, everyone take care x