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An interesting reflection

Jul 23, 2008 07:40PM - 4 comments

I think that we often base our opinion of who we are on how we outwardly appear.  Most of the time that is okay but recently I find myself having to share details my illness that I have kept private for co-workers and other people that I interact with.  I believe that may be to have just a little control over what is going on in my life. The last several days my speech is a mess and today I am at the end of my rope.  I couldn't get a sentence out to save my life.  I actually had to tell people that I was ill so I didn't sound incompetent.  Every word was right on the tip of my tongue but sadly out of reach.  Post its are everywhere and I let most calls go to voice mail so I could gather my thoughts before I spoke to people.  Obviously, this is a really bad day and I know I can get through but having so darn many in a row is just disheartening.  In the past I always had this magic number of days that I would shoot for to get back into a remission and my body has never let me down.  Now it has and all of the worries of not getting any better are here.  I called the doctor because on top of this I still can't get rid of the headache and we are doing the narcotics which I hate.  He then told me that my MRI was just like the last one and that I needed relax and try to get through it.  Normally, that would sound callous but he just really can't help me.  I think I am just really tired and emotional from dealing with this whole mess.

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by cat1203, Jul 23, 2008 09:00PM
you sound like me i was lilke that today, i went into the store and didn't know why i went there i felt like an idiot.  i send several emails and didn't put the attachments.  my attorney was livid.   the hell with him.

by dana_8142, Jul 24, 2008 02:07PM
Hang in there!  You can't always predict what your body is going to do, just have faith in yourself that you are strong enough mentally to get through it.  You can't give up on yourself, even though I'm sure you feel like it.  At this point, if you feel your doc cannot help you anymore, then you have to help yourself.  You have to set yourself some guidelines for living, here's mine - feel free to make it your own:  Life is short so break the rules, forgive quickly (even if it is yourself you are forgiving), kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile!!!

Yes your job is important, so it is hard not to stress at work, but when it comes to everyday life - tell yourself something positive about every situation.  Here's an example, some jerk just cut you off - instead of getting frustrated and yelling, tell yourself something to make it better like, maybe he's in a bigger hurry than you, or maybe he's on his way to see his wife give birth, or thank god that guy cut me off cause now I don;t have to worry about him tail gating me for the next 10 miles!  Just do your best to see every situation as a posistive, it really will make the day a little easier to deal with.

Good luck to you, and I hope things start getting better soon!

by celiacnurse, Jul 24, 2008 02:56PM
Hello-
Celiac is an autoimmune inflammatory disease, as prevalent as 1 in 100 people.  Most common in European descent, but has been found with nearly every ethnicity.  No two people with Celiac Disease present the same.  Celiac is often in conjunction with other medical problems, especially other automimmune illnesses.  If Celiac is identified and a gluten-free diet is followed, primary illness often becomes more stable or goes into remission.  Ask your doctor to do two blood tests, TTG (Tissue Transglutaminase) and IgA.  If they say it's not related just ask them to do it anyway, there is a lot of NEW research.

Hope you feel better.


by Sarahsmom46, Aug 02, 2008 12:15PM
I just read your post and knowing that what we are going through is challenging and at time debilitating, knowing that we are not alone and that others are going though the same if not similar challenges makes it just a little easier to deal with.  At least right now this is helping me.  Reading your post about the challenges you are facing at work really hit home for me too.  I couldn't help but tell my co-workers since my last exacerbation happened at work and it was an acute episode.  Everyone knew then, but they don't know exactly what my diagnosis is.  I'll keep the control over that.  But they do know I was sick and am getting better all the time.  Other than that you keep plugging away trying not to look like you are sick or in pain so no one will think you can't do your job.  I know things are getting better for you now because your latest post says so.  I hope the headaches are gone and if you know what helped get them under control, please let me know because I wake up with them every single day and sometimes in the middle of the night.  When you are still trying to go to work every day, you need as much uninterrupted sleep as you can get.  I hope your improvement continues and that the "pain free" days will last a long time.  Take care.

Julie (Sarahsmom46)

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