Can i see the finish line?

Before it all: July '04 Lupus pops in my system, destroyed heart valve and some, open heart surgery, kidney disease.  the disease was causing my body to retain water.  Went from 160 to 210.  That was horrible pain.  I guess that was when it started.  I was taking oxycontin, morphine, percocets, you name it.  It's a hard road to get past multiple diseases and organ failures.  And whats the obvious solution?  DRUGS!  I tried to go back to engineering school very soon after heart surgery, but on my drugs i was lucky to understand gravity let alone the contextual subjects being taught.  From this point, though i don't think i admitted it to myself, i knew i could never regain what i lost while on narcotics.  A year later, i dropped from 80mg oxycontin per day down to 6 5/325 percocets.  I was so proud, for withdrawals on those is something i would never wish on my worse enemy.  My doctor now is very insistent on tapering my dose to get me off.  My problem is that its been half a year on 4 percs a day, and the last 2 months i have gone to go to 6 per day!  This last dose i received 150 pills for 30 days.  i went through them in 2 1/2 weeks.  Big slap in the face here, i need to stop.  So Monday the 17th was my last pill.  I've been through hell with lupus, years of pain.  I am confident that i can wait it out.  The physical pain is starting to be controllable, but psychologically i'm falling apart.  And i choose to dry out before i go Christmas shopping.  Smart move.  Any advice wisdom or support would be appreciated.
--Adam