Sorry I haven't posted the last couple of days or so but have been real busy which is actually a good thing....less time to dwell on some of the left over WDs that like to pop up unannounced. I am on day 15 Tram free now and doing fairly well. For everyone dealing with the depression that is so common coming off these nasty little pills for me I have found St Johns Wort and 5 HTP most helpful. I am just taking them according to the instructions on the bottles and they have seemed to help. Still have a little anxiety that pops up time to time but a big portion of the depression cloud has lifted. Thats not to say I wont have "bad days" in the future just that right now its working for me. Was having a rough night sleeping last night since I guess RLS is my cross to bear at least a while longer and finally got settled and fell asleep around 2am then at 3am my 4yr old decided to climb into bed with mommy and daddy and oh my that set it off all over again. But was able to catch a little more sleep later in the morning. On a more "adult" note I noticed someone mentioned something about sexual side effects of Tram. While I have never been a sex maniac lol I definately see where the Trams cut down my drive significally over the past few years. I can also say that two weeks out off of them I am seeing a definate increase in my libido and my fiance is quite happy lol! Also, its a great way to release those natural endorphins we are so lacking on when we stop this junk.
Blessed: You are doing an amazing job right now hun and are so brave to be facing this esp. while you are pregnant. If your Dr. okay it for you to take the St Johns Wort now I would definately try it. I think it has really helped at least for me to ease the depression. Hang in there lady and take care of yourself and that lil one you have on the way ;o)
Wannabmother: I did a fast taper similar to you as I took 5 one day 4 the next then 2 then 1 then no more. The first 4 days for me were pretty horrendous. My particular torture that was hard for me was the muscle spasms and RLS I was fine with everything else but that almost ate my lunch. Be sure and read back on some of the earlier post because there are several supplements and remedies that do work. By day 5 I was seeing a light at the end of the tunnel and I am now on day 15 and doing pretty well I feel. Be aware that WDing from Tram is different from Vicodin because Tram also contains an anitdepressent you will be wding from also. Thats this pills dirty little secret. Before I came to this forum I had no idea that it contained an antidepressent and I had been taking it over 5yrs. Take care and hold strong because if you can make it the first 5-7 days everything greatly improves day by day from there.
Well, kiddos are home from school and I am off to get dinner ready. Hope everyone has a blessed and quiet evening. Take care and God bless. Lisa
Booba, I am in total agreement. I was also not going to take Effexor d/t side effects, but it works for some people. The Welbutrin has helped in a weird sort of way- I definitely dont feel that deep darkness that I felt the last time, but it is not dramatic. I am on 150 mg. I have only been on it a week, so we will see.
I am amazed by so many of your stories. IT really helps to get on here and read how others are getting through this. It makes you feel like you are not alone. We are all in this together.
Lady lisa- you are doing really great. You have a great attitude about it too. I think it is good to roll with it and not agonize- you really accept the WD symptoms you have and go on. It is so true, you have to just give yourself some slack during this WD period. I am very fortunate in my job to be able to work from home as I want to, so I dont have to worry about interacting with anyone right now. Thats a really good thing.
I am praying for everyone's success in liberating themselves from the bondage of these pills! Be strong!!
I posted my first post this am and want to ask for some advice.... I still am strong on my quest and have found some very useful information on these posts for my questions... tomm i will try gnc for l- tyrosine? I am dealing with w/d best I can but I find this intestinal bloating the worst symptom. It is awful. any suggestions on how to relieve some of this? I am so uncompfortable all the time.
WANNABEMOTHER, are you about to go cold-turkey? I wish you nothing but the best. And great job on telling your partner. It will make it a little easier even though he doesn't truly understand what you will be feeling.
It's going to be rough. I'm sure you know this already. You will get some weird symptoms. You can do it, though!
Hopefully you are like me. The trick was getting through day 1. Then the symptoms lessoned (slowly, but surely) on days 2 through 7. And then there was some post-acute stuff to deal with. I'm not sure how much knowledge you have in this, but there are several over the counter drugs that can help. Imodium (loperamide) is a must. It does wonders for the diarrhea. And diphenhydramine is good, too. For the insomnia. However, some people say it made their restless legs worse.
And then the obvious; vitamins, minerals, fluids, etc.
It is a brutal experience, but when you start to feel the symptoms fade away (and they will), you will be flying high on your achievement!
Mamakpd- I've seen quite a few people mention that immodium works well to relieve the intestinal discomfort and pain that comes with acute withdrawal. I never had that problem since I did a slow taper, but i'd say it's worth a shot as long as you're not constipated now and you take the recommended dosage.
Beth~it looks like we are on the same dose. Maybe it will take a little while to start working. I do feel better though. I couldnt get through this without you guys. Have a great day. The immodium is a must in the early stages. It really helps. Beth~I will check in with you periodically to see how your wellbutrin is doing so we can compare notes.
I havent had any side effects at all on the wellbutrin. I dont know anything about cymbalta though. Ne thing on the wellbutrin I still feel like me, meaning I dont feel like a zombie at all, which is nice. only been on it a week and 2 days though, so it may still be to early to tell. Have you had any Beth?
Effexor made me feel like I was on drugs!! I guess I am on drugs but you know what I mean. I also couldn't really type. I was spelling words backwards!! It was awful. But the doc is really pushing it. I am 17 days tram free. Maybe I should just take a break from meds and see how I feel. I was feeling good ever since day for of my W/d's .
can ya all keep me in your prayers/thoughts today?
I am not doing well at all! CRYING ALL DAY!!! Crying so much last my eyes hurt.
To top it off we are dealing with some SEVERE financial crisis right now. 3 MAJOR ones.
I am not sleeping hardly at all.
I am so depressed I can hardly function. I cry over everything.
I am having extreme guilt, over many things. Nothing anyone would consider major but to me its like something inside me is saying I am a failure, I will never get things right, I have made sooo many dang mistakes in my life etc etc.
I never felt like this before its all haunting me now. Mostly financial mistakes and then the stress of me being on this crap! And my gosh guilt over EVERYTHING. Everything I think, do or did. Its insane.
I am sure you are all probably saying what a emotional disaster she is. Your right I am an emotional disaster. I can't stand it anymore.
Crying again as I type this.
This is driving me insane! :(
Maybe its the lack of sleep along with the major financial pressures and stresses and no way to fix them.
Anyway I am hanging still at 1 1/2 pills a day divided into 3 doses now. This is day 3 of my last taper.
It just keeps getting worse and worse people!
Dr said its ok for me to try st johns wart but I am terrified of adding yet another thing to my pregnant body.
I am on the 1 1/2 tram, 1 benadryl to sleep (lotta good it does NOT), and 3 tylonal to manage my pain. YAH RIGHT! LOL
My doc says if I get down to 1/2 or 1 there shouldn't be any issues with baby at all. But he said he is not 100% sure as he doesn't have patients on it.
I was thinking of asking for antidepressants (he is on vacation until sept 8th now) but I read baby will have w/d because of that. I can't win.
Anyway all this lack of sleep and having too much on my plate with never ending bills and things breaking (septic jsut went out the day before yesterday) van blew a head gasket and not being able to keep up with bills and no way to get credit not that I want that evil card anyhoo.
but I just ask you all keep me in your prayers/thoughts. I am an emtional mess. I am so lucky to have a supportive hubby. He is gong through stress too from all the financial crap and dealing with an over emotional basket case of a wife I am right now. MORE GUILT! I feel so bad for him. I know its not easy on him either.
All you out there keep up the good work!!! Its amazing those that have quit completely you inspire me. I wish I had the strength to go c/t. I don't know how you did it. You are some amazing people. Keep up the good work.
For those suffering depression know I am sooo thinking about you. I soooo know the hell of it. Wishing blessings upon all of you wonderful people.
Oh blessed I really am praying for you. Just try to think of that little perfect baby inside!!! just keep up with what your doing!!! You are being so brave. I wish there was something more I could do for you!!!
Blessed you are in our prayers. Please dont fret. It will all come together and everything will be okay. Guilt does not help or solve anything, and I know cuz I wallow in it a lot lately. Be gentle on yourself. Keep your chin up. We are all rooting for you.
BessedMommy..... sending you all the strength I could muster. REMEMBER you are not alone in all this there are people right here with you facing all the same things including financial. We are on the right path, taking one hour at a time, trying to do the right thing. Please try and find some strength in that decision. Hard days will lead to easier days, I have to keep hope in that for me and for you. I wish these words could find you some relief, I hope that knowing you are not alone in all of your crisis makes it just a little easier... I will be thinkin of ya....with all my heart
BlessedMommy- You are dealing with a lot of stuff. Your hormones are probably raging anyway since you are pregnant, and then the WD and your other issues. Anyone who has been on this crap has swallowed their share of guilt. Believe me- I am a grandma for heavens sake! We have to realize we are humans who make mistakes like everyone else alive. No one is immune. Forgive yourself and move on to freedom. God will forgive and he will support you at this dark moment. I am praying for you that God will give you strength to get off these pills and protect that sweet life you are carrying. You can do this. Be strong right now and do this for yourself, your baby, and your family. At the end of my taper, I was really an emotional mess too. and through the first 2 days. I am only on Day 7 totally off, but today I am feeling soooo much better. You can get to Day 7 too!! You really can!! Like mamakpd, booba, lookingforheath said- we are all in this together.
I crave......NO not tramadol a double fudge brownie........ I crave.....No not tramadol........a big crusty hunk of italian bread with dipping oil......
I crave.....NO not tramadol.... for these shorts not to be so tight when I sit down after just a short time of w/d
a small price to pay....
but yeah the gas x helped some..... but now i wanna eat....... never a dull moment.....
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
BlessedMommy ~ I so feel for you. Beth is right...Your pg hormones are going nuts and the w/d certainly doesn't help. Just take it hour by hour. Maybe try and steal a few minutes for yourself and just try to refocus.
I wanted to share a couple of little quotes that helped me during my taper. I would get frustrated with myself for not being mentally strong enough to just quite ct. One day early on in my taper I had to run some errands. I stopped by my mother's house and before leaving I saw some little chocolates in a candy dish. I grabbed 2 before walking out the door and threw them in my purse. I was having a really bad day that day....many things were going on that were stressful, but the frustration with myself was really getting to me. I grabbed the chocolates and opened them up and ate them. Then I noticed that there were these little quotes/phrases inside the wrappers. It was as if those 2 quotes spoke directly to me. It was the motivation that I needed to refocus on what I had to do. I keep those 2 wrapper/quotes on my fridge so that I see them often. I know that sounds totally silly, but I felt like it was God/fate/something helping me out when I was down.
The quotes were:
---One's best success comes after one's greatest disappointments - (the disappointment is of course ever allowing tramadol to rule my life and my success is that I conquered it)
---Success is the sum on many small efforts - (this one made me feel good about my "small efforts" = my taper)
The end of day 17. I must have checked in on this site 50 x's today. I just keep reading and hoping that each day will get better. I have found some sort of additional strength here, the connection, the relating.
I know the amounts that I have taken have set a long path for me. In all my reading and going back through journals I cannot get over every little thing I can relate to from the sneezing down to the anxiety.My RLS and my left thigh "stretched" muscle seems to have eased up some today. And the suggestions on the Gas X may have given me enough relief to want to eat. I still feel so intestinally bloated I cannot get over how bad that is. Still had many "foggy" moments today....like I lost my car in the parking lot of target when I went to get the gasx. that was fun.....boardered on a panic attack of confusion, and the energy zaps just beyond drained how that comes and goes. And more poor jaw... I clench so tight that it makes my eyes hurt. I bid all of u a good nite... and will look foward to being here tomm .... maybe just one night better....
I am finishing up Day 16 Tram free and doing pretty good. Today was kinda a little blah but I think that is because I am getting a cold. It is not the usual wd sneezys, I also have a sore throat and stuffiness. But if thats the worst that happens this week I can't complain ;o) Still feeling a little unmotivated and slow moving, was thinking today I sure hope that is still some of the effects from coming off the meds and not that I have just become that lazy lol. I am still taking my vitamins, St Johns Wort, 5 htp, and Vit B12 everyday and plan to contiue with them till whenever. My fiance told me this evening that he is starting to really see a difference already in my personality as I am a lot more "pleasent" and I am smiling a lot more like when were first got together. He has been amazingly supportitive through all of this and has pretty much done whatever he can for me with no questions asked. I was not only blessed to find this forum but also to have the people I do that love me in my life.
Blessedmommy: Sweetie I read your post and I am just aching for you. You need to give yourself some slack. I completely understand the financial stresses. I have so been there and done it time and again. We are your typical paycheck to paycheck family. Between that and you trying to taper and your normal "Mom" duties AND being pregnant you could very well be streching yourself too thin hun. Is it possible to check with your Dr. about maybe slowing up a little on the taper? All this stress is so no good for you and your little one. I promise to keep you in my thoughts and prayers. You so need some TLC for yourself right now.
MamaK: I am sorry to see you are still dealing with so many of the nasty physical wd's still this far out. I don't know if I would be out of line suggesting something so please just take this as just that a suggestion. Could maybe reading too much on here be causing you to what they call "trigger". I know some people I have read about say they have to take a break time to time from the forums so that they don't dwell on it to much. Does that make sense? I know about day 10 I was reading a lot here and on the other drug abuse page and I think it made me think about and dwell on my own WDs to much. So I took a break and checked in time from time but I have been trying to keep it to about 2-3 times a day. Like I said I may not even be close and its just a thought. As for the RLS I can't be to much help there because it pesters me still a few times a day and still mainly at night which is not very helpful when you are trying to sleep. One thing that has also helped me is that I have now found it very liberating to know I no longer have to be a slave to that pill. No more hoping I have enough money for my script and counting out pills to be sure I will have enough to last me till I do have the money or can get it re-filled. It's like I have been always holding my breath the past 5 years and I can finally just breathe again.
Hang in there everyone and hope you all have quiet and peaceful night. Take care and God bless! Lisa
Blessedmommy- I am praying for you and hoping you are doing OK. Please hang in there. Let us know how you are doing.
Mamakdp- I totally relate to all your comments. Its weird that it seems like when I have a bad spell, I start that sneezing again at the same time. It is so liberating to not search for pills, count to be sure I have enough, all that stuff is over and I am so thankful.
Ladylisa- you have done fantastic. You are such an encouragement to me and others here. Day 16- thats awesome. At day 8 now, I am just over the hump and feeling better. Still having occasional issues as you mentioned- the sneezing, RLS- but it is getting better, foggyness, very tired at days end.
I used to run around the house in the evening doing all sorts of stuff, now I have been getting my PJ's on at 7:30p and just resting. It is actually kind of nice to not feel so compelled to be up doing something all the time. I also can see I am beginning to be able to concentrate better at work- and not run around talking to everyone non-stop. I am normally a rather introverted person. Someone commented that the trams caused some extra pain- I agree. I think the aching in my joints was a side effect- it is now gone. I dont have all the energy, but I dont even care. I want to be ME again. I was on those pills for 10 years!! Thats a long, long time. My grandkids dont even know ME- not trammed up. I think now I will be able to sit still with them. But guilt does not help- we all need to just going to go on now and be who we really are. I am so so grateful to everyones support here and to God for bringing me through this difficult time.
Hello Dear Ones..I am back from a 2 week road trip..I was not able to come out here very often..I need to catch up..but I do see that there are many out here struggling..many getting the edge over this hideous drug..I HATE TRAMADOL... For those of you struggling..my heart aches for you...I know how hard it is..just seems the easier way some days just to give in to the call...but try to remember that giving in to it will just prolong the agony of finally getting off and getting back to YOU..I am 120 days out today..and I would be less than honest if I told you that I never have the urge to go back...sometimes I do..and that is related to energy.. But that is it!!! all the other effects of the Tram..you can keep them!!! I've been traveling..seeing customers and this is the first time in many years that my interactions have been genuine..I can hear what they are saying and respond in an articulate manner..unlike my zombie tram days..i didnt hear much of anything...i am getting back to the person who loves people and loves helping people..I was so incredibly self absorbed during the height of my tram use..there was no room for anyone else to matter in my world..just give me my drugs..that is what mattered most. re: energy..some days are better than others..i find that if I exercise or keep busy..keep my body moving..i feel so much better..but if im working here in front of my computer, or just sitting..that feeds into the low energy syndrome..a vicious cycle of sorts.. I know that it feels so rough for so many of you..scared, crying fits, fear...FEAR..bigtime..depression..all of this..believe me this is the norm for withdrawing from the tram..this and so much more..but these are feelings my friends.. and you will get to the other side of these feelings to be sure...they will not kill you..howwever, continued and escalated use of the Tramadol has potential to to do great harm to your body, psyche and spirit...So please hang in..keep going ..keep talking out here...so many dear ones out here to help and encourage us all along..this site saved my life...and got me moving in the right direction so much wisdom knowledge love and support.
For all my old friends..I've missed you..TH, LeeAnn,Sasha, Diane, Tripper, Bode, Beth, and all the others...and to the new friends out here...sending up prayers for the strength, courage and resolve to continue the fight..and sending out a ton of love and hugs...
We are all in this together..you are NEVER alone...and remember ..this is a NO SHAME, NO GUILT, NO JUDGEMENT zone..none of this stuff helps..they are all counter productive to our efforts to get off this crap.. so speak your mind..speak your truth..I salute you all..you are all my heroes.
You are all so awesome! Thank you for all the encouragement, scriptures, thoughts/prayers. I cried tears of joy when I read the thoughtfulness of you all. AMAZING people I tell ya!!!
Wouldn't ya know it I am doing better today. :) Great ?NAHHHH I won't lie but better. Dang I think these hormones along with everything else is kicking my BUTT!!!! Geesh being a woman! LOL.
I actually slept last night for the first time in 4-5 days. I only woke up 3 times and was slept in until 5:30. Trust me this is a huge deal as I woke up feeling much more rested! Which I am finding severe lack of sleep just is not good for those seratonin chemicals I swear.
So today is a new day and I am cutting back to 1 1/4 now. WOOHOOO. I can do it I think!!!
I did 3 days on the 1 1/2 so time to take a leap of faith and do it again. Gee after I just started feeling better too! UGHH.
I had contractions ALL day yesterday. Every 5 minutes. I SOOOO wish my doctor was back. I NEED him! LOL. the contractions have subsided now but it sure ***** having them as I start to panic baby will come early before I am off this junk.
I still haven't picked up the st johns wart yet. But I am going to do that probably tomorrow.
I only had super mild stretching last night and sneezing cold like symptoms but no fever/chills feeling.
I am sooo amazed at how well ya all are doing and many 2 weeks or more out.
Now the question is what will I do for pain control /depression after lil one arrives? Maybe I can be free from having to take any? I was in physical therapy, message therapy and chiropractic care for awhile and it really helped but then my insurance changed over and money got tight so I don't go anymore. But if I could keep those up then I think my pain would be significantly reduced.
will we ever get our energy back? Those that have been off for awhile does the energy come back? Beth I totally relate to having so much energy to get things done and now I have none!! It *****! Then it makes you believe you NEED this drug to function (to not be depressed, to get things done,to be super human) UGHHH the lies!
Anyone liking the L tyrosone? please do share!!
I am 34 1/2 weeks. And counting down. Praying my water won't break to early. It always breaks early but not until 38 weeks. I hope/pray I can hang until then and that this little one stays put until then.
Still having massive feelings of guilt/shame and beating the HECK out of myself!
My whole goal in life is to be the best wife and mommy I can be and serve my family with all my love/joy and for them to see me like this really stinks. I LOOOOOVE having a family! It is my greatest joy ever. I LOOOOVE having my dh and my kids and when I feel like I am doing such an awful job at it the guilt just washes over me like whirlwind. I can't wait to be back to myself again! I mean my family was my dream since childhood. Just rambling again but can't wait for my family to see me not crying or in pain.
I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO thinking of you all! I just feel so much for you all! I hate that you are having to go through this. I hate what this drug has done to us all! I hate the lies it feeds us! I hate that it makes us believe we can be super human only when taking it and it takes away all our fears, anxietys, depression and pain!
I am MAD at it!
I am so thinking about you all today and wishing you the best in this crappy journey.
Keep praying for my sweet little one to be safe and not feel what I am feeling. I can't wait to update you all with a birth story!
I pray it goes well. All I keep seeing in my mind is this little baby who is helpless and screaming and uncomfortable because of this crap! ughhhh.
I wish I knew for sure how much of this drug is filtered out through the placenta. I thought about calling the company who makes it and after I rant and rave how this is a drug from hell then ask them their thoughts. :)
My friend who has just had her baby taking 4-5 a day hasn't given me another update but 2 days after birth even though he was born early did AWESOME. no w/d at all she said then. I can only hold on to that.
Doing a LOT of research, I started my cold turkey journey yesterday. I knew what to expect, crying, chills, restless legs, miserable stomach...etc...I'm SURE you all know the rest. I had those horrible symptoms EVERY time I tried to get off of the medicine. It never worked! I would run to the doctor and get my supply and feel alright with the world again.
THIS time was the most different time ever. I have a REAL goal in my life and part of that goal requires that I do NOT take this horrible pill. It has FINALLY gotten to the point where I do NOT want this pill in my body anymore regardless of how I feel. I've NEVER felt this strongly- I keep telling myself that no matter what symptom pops up-I can deal. This is the attitude that has brought me the furthest I've ever gone. I haven't come far but far enough to know that normally I'd be back in my tramadol stupor. My last dose was Tuesday afternoon and Thursday morning, I'm not doing as bad as I thought.
What I'm trying to tell a lot of you is that I'm NOT going symptom free BUT I'm accepting and dealing with it each moment it comes and instead of being scared of "when will this end" I look forward to how great my life will be without the meds AND that I made it through another second, minute, hour, day, night...etc. I have NO idea HOW I'm doing this exactly, I just know that I made the final decision that I'd rather have a healthy life and body without the help of a medicine that only hurts me-I've cried, I've been nervous, but I put on as much of a fighter face as I've can-I wanted to share how I got through the symptoms SO FAR.
Emotions-I cry when I have to but I also stop and do something else
RLS-Last night was bad but I took Hylands Restless Legs (can get at any pharmacy) and that actually let me sleep last night more than I usually would so I woke up more rested and therefore less weepy
Stomache-Immodium has been my BEST friend
EAT-It is SO hard to think about putting food in our stomaches when we feel like this but not eating makes everything worse. I've been eating peanut butter sandwiches for protein, bananas, light but GOOD foods.
Anxiety-I do take Klonopin which I just weened off of with no side effects but I figured Tramadol is a bit rougher so I take the min dosage to help with the more extreme anxious parts of my day
Lack of Energy-Since I'm already on the Immodium AND I still need to work, drink a little coffee just to keep me moving and not pass out during the day/I also try and work out, even though it kills me to go-last night I put on my angriest music and hit the treadmill-def felt good after.
Other things I'm going to try to get through this because I KNOW this isn't over yet:
The way I see it, the more I focus on what I can do to get better, the less I will want to lay here and do nothing OR worse yet, go back on the meds.
I definitely do NOT know it all and every person is different, but I wanted to share my thoughts since I thought today (day 2) was going to be HELL and it's not even close.
I'll keep you posted after the weekend and hopefully I'm STILL smiling!! Good luck all, God Bless, and THANK YOU for giving me a space to write and "vent" XOXO
Had a better day... actually got up motivated.... clean bathrooms....... whewwwwww
although a huge zap of decreased energy and a terrible stomach bout this afternoon (not sure thats not the gasx really kicking in) I feel okay now....ready to call it a day
POINT.... another day through and actually have good feeling about beating this thing. I see the comments about slow and easy are gonna have to remain in my forefront.
We can do this ... each day gets a little better.... hang strong my counterparts I will wish you all a wonderful eve...
LadyLIsa... took your comment with great consideration and actually attributed to my motivated day.... thanks for the wonderful thoughts and a new idea to help me through....
Hello, I'm sure most people are going to think I'm crazy but...I have been on tramadol for over a year now for sciatica and RLS. It is the worst thing I have ever done and I'm scared now. I have tried three times to get off of them and between my RLS, sciatica, menopause, I am also a full time nursing student. I cant afford to miss any classes, I cant afford to "not" get sleep..I am so miserable. I have horrible night sweats, tremors in my hands, my legs jump constantly like bugs crawling on them, I am in alot of pain nightly. My mind wont shut down at night unless I stay up till at least 2am. Heres the kicker, I am only on 50 mg ONCE a day. I have never taken more than one and I'm having the same symptoms as some that have taken 5 to 8 a day! (I am in NO way suggesting that my addiction to Tram is any better or worse than anyone elses..)This stuff is evil!!! I have always done the "natural" route but had to accept the tramadol when I could no longer function with the nightly pain and not getting any sleep, the doctor told me it was the safest. Right safe for what? I have tried every natural sleep med available to no avail. I dont want to try anything else for pain and end up with another addiction. I cant take benedryl or any other antihistamine, I have arrythmias with them, plus I have a low tolerance for meds..meaning you have to give me a child dose of almost anything. I cant be on this stuff when I do clinicals! Isnt there a doctor out there willing to step up and do some much needed research? We truly are guinea pigs... Please someone help... I just need some sleep, I'll figure out how to deal with the pain with Gods help. Thanks for listening.
Nursing student, none of us will think you are crazy, we understand completely.
I was finishing my masters in biomedical science when I came off tramadol & I felt just like you. I couldn't cope with not sleeping. I was also on a low dose but over 5 years. Dose & length of use most likely effect the duration of withdrawals but some have reported withdrawals after only a few weeks of tramadol.
I too tried every herbal alternative for sleep. I also tried hypnosis; meditation & cognitive behaviour therapy but not in a very persistent manner as I was freaking out trying to study on no sleep. I am also riding the perimenopause roller coaster. In my desperation, I turned to prescription sleep meds & I can only hope that if I ever suffer from a bout of prolonged insomnia again, I will tough it out.
The zopiclone worked a charm & I was so happy to be sleeping again, before too long, I was dependent on them & feeling nervous at the prospect of doing without. When my script ran out, I quit cold turkey & went into benzo withdrawal as unfortunately, my doctor had not come across Dr Ashton & her excellent tapering plans & I only found her after many weeks of withdrawal.
These meds are also lousy for memory as they affect your REM sleep which is required for consolidation of memory. I went into one exam & went completely blank, even though I knew the material well.
All I can do is urge you not to panic, your body will recover its natural rhythms. If you need a week out of class, there are now medical studies available to show your doctor that tramadol does produce tolerance & withdrawals or you could plead flu if you don't feel up to going the rounds with the doctor. This would enable you to grab some sleep when you can rather than trying to make your body comply with your class schedule.
Hylands restful legs seems to help many people with the restless legs as do tonic water with quinine & epsom salt baths.
The night sweats should ease off after a week or so, unless they are menopause related.
You will get through this. Look at those who are 2 weeks out & feeling so much better already.
Blessedmom, extra hugs for you. Baby will be fine, your love & concern for your child shines through. Just focus on a gentle taper as minimizing your own stress is more conducive to going full term than sending your body into the shock of tramadol withdrawal.
Wannabe, beth, lisa, mamakpd, looking, my freedom & booba, you are all doing so well. I just want to add a few lines about guilt. I did so many dumb things while on tramadol, the worst of which was the decision to take sleeping pills, however, I also missed planes, missed 2 exams due to withdrawals, bought too much stuff & filed all my tax returns really late. I was a medical student & I should have known better but neither I nor my doctors thought to blame the tramadol.
I have been greatly set back in my goal to become a registered dietitian & am running out of money as I lost a lot of time from the tramadol misadventures. All I can do now is make sure I achieve my goal one way or another as I refuse to let the tramadol run any more of my life. It is done; I am wiser & I can do things differently from now on.
Catopress works wonders! Hey everybody, just wanted to give a little advice on what has helped for me: Last time I tried to get free I was on the catopress patch but ended up tearing it off bcuz it just made me too too tired to stay awake for job, kids, etc, plus it made me zombie, no feeling girl! But after a suggestion on this site i now stick it on about two hrs prior to bedtime (cut it into thirds) and take a benadryl and have been sleeping like a baby! no wd's at all on this patch! i take it off as soon as I wake and feel like my crampy achy jittery self during the day (which I have decided is better than feeling zombie girl) It apparently has a very short half life. I'm groggier than normal in the am, but then outta my system fast....it's been a life saver for me going through this!
madmak, you made me laugh, thank you! i totally feel your OCD craziness, and when I'm craving, I usually go shopping (at thrift shop so it's not too much of a financial prob lol) or I obsessively check this blog! But as ladylisa said, it really can make you worse if you obsess too much about the blog and what other symptom you can relate to etc! In some ways I believe it was easier (well, maybe not the right word there, never easy) to come off this stuff during pregnancy four years ago when I didn't know it was this drug causing the symptoms! Sometimes ignorance is bliss! lol
Myfreedom, thank you sooo much for the scripture in Psalms! I've been collecting scriptures to help me through this difficult journey and i added that to my list! My other fav is : I can do ALL things through Christ which strengthens me!!! phil 4:13 also, can so relate to you ladyL about feeling like you've been holding your breath....that's exactly the way i've felt for seven years! thinking in my crazy mind "i'll do this or that after my pill when I can breathe again" (substitute breathe for have energy, or be social, or be nice, or NOT be irritable, etc, etc...when reality tells me (he's my husband ;-) ) that I really wasn't more social or more interractive, or more energetic....in reality I was fogged out, more irritable, obsessed, unable to be intimate, unemotional (which is NOT a good thing) and NOT myself! People really do like who I am (so I've been told ;-) people would prefer the genuine ME, who has some down days, who isn't always bubbly, but who IS REAL!!
Living present: thank you for your INSPIRING words!! re decreased energy: I have been researching alot , as I c you ALL do here ;-) and have found that lack of b vitamins (mainly 6, 12, folate) causes depression (which I know most of you knew) but also found that not only does the evil pill deplete you of those vitamins, but so does ANY anti inflammatory ie: motrin, advil, aleeve, aspirin, tylenol, etc) AND also any type of H2 antagonist ie: antacids, such as nexium, prilosec, tums, etc etc) I've been taking all of these things for years, and i'm sure many of you have as well due to symptoms of the evil pill! I went out and got all the b vitamins, as well as charcoal caps (for toxins) and SAM-E As I said b4, I am most scared of the depression, so I am trying to do whatever I can (without taking antidepressants) to keep it at bay. So far I've weaned to 1 1/2 day (from 3-4) and doing good (with exception of the first wean from 3-4 to 2 ...think it was too big a decrease as I cried for two days)
Beth: you are so right about the guilt thing.....let it go!!! Guilt is as evil as the evil pill! I lmean yes, we need to have a conscience, but trust me I know ALOT about guilt and it destroys you physically and emotionally! i don't think any of us started this drug saying "I know a way to get high and want to be a drug addict...woohoo!" no way, most of us didn't even know the damn stuff was addictive, and that's what makes me so damned angry!! If you want to feel something, just get angry~! The anger keeps me in the right direction, altho too much of that can be damaging 2 lol!
nsgstudent: I am a nurse and know what you're going through, and KNOW you CAN do it! Nursing school was one of the toughest times in my life, esp going thro it with a one yr old (now 18) but it CAN be done! And once you've gotten yours, elf in a better place, may I suggest that when you hear dr's prescribing this crap and telling their patients it's nonaddictive, PLEASE jump right in with a baseball bat and knock some sense into him/her!!! PLEASE tell the patient the REAL story! Don't shy away bcuz of shame, please help someone else not to go through this hell any time you have the opportunity!
ONE MORE THING, lol, I was wondering with the fog problem, do you all notice that it gets worse toward the evening (from about 4:00 on)??? or is it just me?
Thank you all for your experiences, and sorry for such a long post, but you ALL inspire me that much!! ;-)
lyn: I definitely have more issues with all WD symptoms in the evening as I begin to get tired from the day. On Day 9 now, when I get up in the morning I feel awesome- really good. I am sleeping OK- not super great, but good enough. The evenings have been worse for me, but I am getting a little better every day. Wednesday I felt great ALL day!! I think the WD is a little unpredictable, but whatever will be will be. I am hoping for another entire good day soon. :)
I totally agree with the personality changes that occur taking trams- that you convince yourself are positive, and thats why you need to take the trams. IT IS ALL A LIE!! You seem to your trammed up self to be more outgoing, friendly, blah blah blah, but really it is so unnatural- really. Think about it. Thats the thing I hate the most. I did love the energy, but that was not even working any more- without taking a bigger dose. How long can you just keep taking bigger doses??? It's way not worth it. I lied to my self too long and I am done with it. Like you said Lyn, in reality it DOES make you irritable (I need another pill), tired (I need another pill), withdrawn (I need another pill), sad (I need another pill), my joints ache (I need another pill), unfocused (maybe I took too much), shy (I need another pill). We dont NEED ANOTHER PILL!!! We need to be ourselves again. I miss myself.....at day 9 I see glimpses of her again and I like that. I am not going to lie to myself anymore.
Hang on warriors!! You can do this!! We all must be free of the lies of these pills!!
Hi all, I am 34 yr old female with a ten year history of alcohol abuse (that has been undetected and unspoken of until now) however that stopped 4 weeks ago when I sustained a calcaneus fracture (broken heel) I was admitted for 1 week and dosed up on tramadol 100mg x 2 & paracetamol 4 times a day (was also given sevradol on about 5 occasions) anyway I took the tramadol as prescribed 2 4 times day for 2 weeks and then I realised I really wasnt in that much pain and seeing as I was already trying to kick an addiction I didnt want or need them so I dropped them to 2 am and 2 pm for a week then just stopped because the fracture didnt hurt at all now I cant sleep, I feel sick all the time, I cant eat, 1 minute I am hot the next I am cold, I keep crying my emotions are all over the place I have such a lack of empathy someone could say the house is burning down and I'd just sit there and say OK, I keep waking with bad stabbing pains in my ankle and severely restless legs like many of you have described I felt so bad 2day then before reading this site I popped 2 (how stupid) but now reading this I have alot more hope and gratz to all of you who have kicked it I didnt know whether it was withdrawal from alcohol or tramadol or both but I am definately not taking anymore but how long does this last?
Welcome, time2grow, sorry you are feeling so poorly. This sounds like classic tram withdrawal, although if you are coming off a serious alcohol habit, your hormones & neurotransmitters would already be under stress.
As to how long, after only one month of tram, you should start to see some improvement from the tram withdrawals within the week. I know some of our other posters have also quit alcohol but not sure if anyone took this on at the same time as coming off tram. Hopefully someone will share their experience.
Any of the classic remedies would be helpful for your situation. Hylands restful legs for the RLS; epsom salt baths; immodium for stomach problems; benedryl, valerian, melatonin for sleep; 5htp, st john's wort for depression & some exercise as soon as you can handle it.
Stick with this & you are well on the way to the best health you have enjoyed in 10 years.
19 days clean......
Even better today than yesterday. I am grateful for the attitude adjustment suggestions, it seemed to make a better day. Don't get me wrong I had my moments, and I am still getting some fog but I tell my mind work through it and GO foward. It really can be done. I really have no cravings I have come too far and to do this w/d thing again I DONT THINK SO....I know it was much easier typing that. But to all those who check in Thank you and for those watching this can be done.
So I will say goodnite and wish all a really good day tommorrow. Better things are looking closer.
Today was day 2 of my 1/4 pill taper. A little ruffer then yesterday but manageable until now for some reason.
I am twitching and hot/cold. What is the twitching about? WEIRD! I don't remember feeling uncontrollable small twitches before.
I am doing a 1/4 a pill taper every 3 days. I get to where I want to start shaking. UGHHH.
So today my dose has been 1 1/4 divided into three doses.
So I am on 62.5 mg a day now and STILL experiencing w/d. I am soooo mad at it!! UGHH> you would think cutting back to this very low dose I would be fine just jumping off and being ok but it seems to be getting almost worse the lower I go. UGHH.
What can be done for the tremor feeling and the cold/hot can't make up my mind feeling does anyone know?
I take my dose every 6 hours and try to spread it longer but I get the twitching feeling. Actually since I have been getting some sleep my depression is much more under control which is amazing. I am not crying every 5 minutes. AMazing how not having sleep can make you cry all day. :(
Any ideas here about my weird twitching and like bugs are in my skin? what to do?
I really thought I could do this quicker then I am. A bit disappointed with myself I just want OFF NOW!!!!!
I have NOOOO clue how in the world you all do it cold turkey. There is NOOOO way I could muster that.
I have periods of feelign w/d free and those are wonderful moments. But soon as its time for my next dose I am having these stupid symptoms.
Mamak YAY so proud of you. Doing great!!! Keep up the awesome work. I wish I was where you were at right now.
The rest of you AWESOME job!! I am envious that you guys/gals have this dang thing beat. Wish I could say I am as strong. I am too much of a weany to jump off the tram train just yet.
Nursingstudent: if you are just taking 1 pill a day and wanting to taper I would do 1/4 a pill 3 times a day and go from there. That might help. Or if you are ready to jump off hopefully it won't be as bad as those of us on 3-4 a day adn then cut back.
You are all so awesome. The good thing about this is that it makes me never want to touch this crap again!! I am TICKED off at it. Mad at my doctor even for giving it to me in the first place. I would rather w/d on darvocet.
Finishing up Day 17 here and chugging along. Sleep is still a pain as in trying to get any.....it's mainly the RLS thing for me and the constant need to stretch my legs when I lay down. I haven't tried the Hylands yet because I couldn't find any in the town where I live but we are running into the town next to us tomorrow and they a quite a big larger and have a Walgreens and CVS so I should be able to find it there. My fiance was telling tonight how proud he is of me and that he is so thrilled with all the effect of NOT being on the Tram is starting to have on me like I am laughing more, and wanting to spend time with the family more and well my libido is bouncing back ::blushing:: The kiddos have been groaning and complaining though because we are me more "lovey dovey" around each other lol. While I am still not 100% because mainly of the sleep and some lack of energy I do feel SOOOOOOOOOOOO much better. I have found my arthritis pain is actually being controlled quite well with Advil and Tylenol or occassionally Excedrin Back and Body. For those just starting out on your journey to be free of this horrible drug please remember that better days are not that far away. I am a little over 2 weeks out after a very fast taper then CT and I feel 100 times better than I did those first 5 days. And all the natural remedies that everyone reccommends really do help.
Blessed: Those little twitches and the hot/cold thing I am so sorry to say are WDs. Bless your heart you really are doing so great and in my opinion are very brave to be doing this for not just your little one on the the way but for yourself and your family. Keep it up and hang in there I think you truely are going to kick this thing ;o)
MammaK: I am so happy to hear that you are feeling better and seeing some real improvement. You have come way to far to go back now and I completely know what your mean about just thinking of the horrible WDs the first few days helping to kill those cravings!
Hope everyone has a wonderful, peaceful, and restful weekend! I am going to be a little busy this weekend but of course will check in time to time and my prayers are with you all every day. Take care, Lisa
MamaK-I read those words you write and I can't stop crying. To once again be able to crave a piece of bread as opposed to Tramadol..I want that more than anything right now. Thank-You for giving me some hope!!
I am new to the site, but am so glad I found it. A lil history. I have been taking Tramadol for aprrx. 3-4 years now, regularly. I was first given Ultracet(with tylenol) for acute headaches. Took my first 1-2 tabs(prolly was only one at that time-can't remember) and felt the effects all day..kinda buzzed(kinda liked it..but was weird), got rid of the headache..got energy..felt confident..I'm golden. Had some minor icthing from it, but was tolerable. Then I found myself taking up to 8 tabs daily, with hardly any pain relief and honestly have to look at the clock to know what time I took it as I was so immune to it, sometimes couldn't tell if I took it or not. Have chronic headaches and back pain. I've had enough and want to start a family. I hate this, I am constantly aware of when my next does is, do I have enough til my next refill, I purposely waited until I got back from vaca to go off of them so I could enjoy my vaca. I count my pills, look at the clock and figure when my next "fix" will happen planning it around situations and work. If I had a bad day or whatever the reason..well then I can justify taking another dose. I heard you could get addicted, but ignored the warnings. Life is happening and i need to deal with it somehow. I was in Xray school when I really started taking it. I'm married with pets-no kids YET. I've had to deal with family issues including the suicide of my only sibling..my younger brother. I can't deal anymore with the pain , enough is enough now. I have battled these headaches too long now and the trams no longer work to fully relieve the pain. I need more and more often. I have tried a yoga, massage, exercising, chiropracter. Nothing. I don't want to live dependant on meds anymore.
Went and saw a neurologist for Headaches, she said I have Analgesic Rebound Headaches from you got it the Tramadol. I have every single symptom and it makes perfect sense as I started with Excedrine first, then a few other headache meds(which didn't help) until I found Tramadol. I wake up everyday with a headache and it lasts all day long, but is relieved with the Trams. Sick of it. I can't funciton in the AM until I take my Trams..everyday..3-4times daily for the last 3 years or so. No more. Its time for a change. I must per MD orders, stop ALL meds to flush my system clean of these toxins. I was given Amitriptyline 10mg as a preventitive which can be used for anti-depressant as well as for nerve pain. 1 tab at bedtime.
Yesterday I took my last 2 tramadol. I tapered down a lil bit, but hardly. 8/day, 6/day, 4/day, 2/day. And now I'm out and this *****. Its been more than 24 hours since my last dose. I couldn't sleep last night, sweaty and hot and then freezing and cold. Diarrhea started a little bit today. Have a mild headache(thank-god I don't have a bad one) Shaking, crying, very anxious, and irritable. This *****! And I have to leave for work in 2 hours! Don't know how I will make it through, hopefully my co-workers will understand=( I took some immondium and benadryl last night, but still didn't sleep well. ITs all I think about right now. Watched a movie last night to concentrate on something else which seemed to help a little bit. I will stay posted and thanks for posting eveyone, I'm so relieved to know I'm not alone here. Thanks for listening and best of luck to everyone!!
Morning everyone! Hope you are all doing well on this thing called ridding ourselves of the lies of tramadol!
Sweetstang: do you think you can taper a little more slowly? I would go that route if possible. It is just too miserable otherwise. that is if you think you can do it.
I remember last time I tried to go cold turkey it was the worst experience I ever had. My doc at that time told me to taper and do clonodine (blood pressure med) I was too scared to take the clonodine so I tried to taper but had no insentive at the time and my pain/depression was keeping me hooked. But I would ask your doctor for clonodine to help. My sister did the clonodine when coming off oxycontin and she said it was her saving grace. Just a thought!
I am scared of meds so after I get off this crap I am staying off ALL meds unless needed. Just some thoughts.
Ladylisa, beth, booba, lookingforhealth, myfreedom and well all of you. I want to thank you for the support. I know i seem like a big baby now. And its nice to know you all are wishing me well. Hugs to you all. And keep up the good work. your stories are inspiring.
About my progress:
Well I have to confess. I was having a severe panic attack this morning along with twitchy body and feeling like bugs were crawling under my skin so I actually took extra. I could not take it! It was making me crazy. Zappy feelings, extreme irritability, heart racing, stretching, hot/cold and just feeling like I was going crazy. So I set myself back :(
So today I will most likely by the time the day is over be back to 1 1/2 :(. I am so ashamed just terrible about it. but I feel soooo much better.
This is my first time I have relapses a bit! I think when you are getting the dose down this low it is even harder.
Going from 4 to 3 was much easier and then 3 to 2 was a bit harder but from 2 to 1 1/4 has really put me under.
I was having some pain as well which i hadn't had in about 3 days so that makes it harder to taper.
I keep holding on to the fact that someone on here and a friend of mine I met online was on 4 a day when their lil one was born and neither had w/d in their babies. So if I can at least get to 1 a day I am hoping the same for me. Please someone that has been on this while pg the whole time tell me they were on it and baby didn't have w/d symptoms.
I will never forgive myself! the thing is my friend that was on 4 a day tried to taper to fast she went from 4 to 2 to none all within 3 days and viola she went into labor at 36 weeks. her baby was great but still scary. I honestly don't see how a baby can have no withdrawls with how crappy I feel when just tapering.I think the placenta filters out more then we realize though.
Its hard when you have chronic pain and you feel you can't function without them.
So a couple questions. tomorrow was suppose to be my taper down to 1. I am not thinking I will be successful with the way I felt today after 3 days of a taper of 1/4. The third day (today) was THEEE worst.
Any ideas how to do this comfortably as far as should I take 1/4 pill x 4? instaed of the 1/2, 1/4, 1/4 spaced out?
Maybe if I just stick with my every 4-5 hours schedule w/d won't be as bad and just cut the pill amount down each time instead of trying to stick with 3 doses instead of my usual 4.
Can someone who tapered share with me how they do this in the end. I am ALMOST there and for some reason it seems harder. you would think I am on 8 a day and quite cold turkey the way I feel! GEESH!
Any ideas! Please those of you that took it up until delivery share your stories with me good or bad. :)
I want to know what to excpect. I know on my chronic pain board some ladies shared with me what they are on and they are on MUCH more then I am on (vicoden 4 x a day, oxycodone 4 x a day, methodone etc) and none have had w/d except somoene on fentanyl patch. or those on heavy use.
1st time posting but finding helpful advice on Tramadol/Ultram withdrawal is tough. I first tried to quit cold turkey not knowing about the withdrawal. Suicidal thoughts almost won that battle. I was on the pills for knee pain and surgery for 3 years. Started at 200 then doc increased to 300 per day. No mention of either side effects- addressed shortly after I started taking them and decided that the pain was gone and doc said it was completely safe so it was fine. My doc won't even prescribe oxy ever she said after my surgery and the knee surgeon gave me 2 weeks worth. I am the person who even questioned taking an aspirin or tylenol. Working at a grocery store, standing for 7 hours a day, after 20 years my knees had enough. Anyway, the Tram stopped working and the pain remained so why keep taking...I decided to stop. At no point in time did my doc warn me of any possible withdrawal. I would have never taken it to start. Now after tapering off for a month I have been off them completely for almost 3 weeks. Doc gave me Xanax to relieve the symptoms, said hardly anyone has withdrawal so she didn't mention...I would like to sue her or at least slap her across the face. She kept telling me to take them even after I said they stopped working. How much of a cut is she getting? How can you do this to a person?
When do the withdrawals go away? I have the brain fog...brain squeeze, brain vibrations...I don't even know how to put into words what it feels like. Depression is a major factor. I lost my job because I couldn't function. No more sleep...I miss that the most. Today I broke down and took 1 Xanax because the brain crap was so bad. No one seems to believe me. I want to check myself into a hospital. I hope this goes away soon...permanent damage has crossed my mind.
Thankyou so much for your answer madtram I will definately try some of the remedies you have suggested and will definately not take anymore tramadol paracetamol should do the trick from now on & thankyou for your kindness it helps when Im feeling so crappy but it will all be worth it in the end.
i know how you feel i had several surgries and i didnt want to take strong pain meds i took trams becasue it wasnt addicting boy was i fooled no sleep stupid thoughts racing through my mind so i couldnt sleep felt like i had lost something or was really missing something and i couldnt fine what it was just give it time it all gets better i hope sooner than later for you but i know just how you feel i was in your shoes good luck to you and everone good nite all
I really need to check up more often than I do. I come to check and thee are like 50 mssages I missed. I try to catch up and it takes so darn long! LOL
Thanks MtFreedom and Blessed Mommy for the encouraging words. I do appreciate it. Things are going good here - I am at 2 1/2 per day , 1 - 1/2 - 1. The drop from 1-1-1 to 1-1/2-1 was not bad. I am in second day of 2 1/2 total.
MyFreedom -thanks for the details about your leap. Sounds encouraging! Yes, the tramadol affected me BIG TIME in the sex drive category. Honestly, there was a time I would go weeks without even a thought - as long as I had enough trams for the day. Sad.
Baby is doing well (for those I may have confused, I am a DAD, my wife is the one pregnant ; ) We are on week 30.
The prescriptions from the doc still helping energy and overall well being. Up days/down days. I had one day last week I felt like a million bucks - then the very next day felt like I fell off a cliff. Taking multivitamin, 5000IU Vitamin D and 50 mg (prescription) DHEA.
~~ BlessedMom - don't beat yourself up. It is tough at the 1-2/day level! Not a setback at all. I always take my largest of the three times/day at night because I know that is the toughest. In your example I would probably go 1/4, 1/4, 1/2. Mornings are easiest for me (lots going on, have coffee, etc.). Nights=not so good.
So I am very new here and stubled upon this thread and am scared now. I have been on Norco for three years due to stones and recently gotten off those with tramadol and from what I am reading that's not good either? I though that the tramadol was non addictive am I going to be going through the same withdral symptoms as the Vicodin? Also is the gittery leggs at night from withdrawl if so what can I do to help?
Busy Saturday didn't allow me to post yesterday. But it was another good day... Day 20
Believe when I say This can be done. Each day the smallest improvement allows me to go on. I did end up with a terrible back ache last night, but a heating pad and two tylenol got me through. I know I will face challenges as we all will, but I want so much to post positive things for everyone to have hope. I am not walking around with a bunch of roses, but more than anything I want anyone reading this to know that WE CAN DO THIS.
My goal this next week is to start walking and doing some excersize. My body still may disagree with that, but my mind has to overcome.
I will say that I have started taking my vitamin B complex twice a day and that really seems to be helping. My biggest hurtle was reading some posts of mind over matter (thanks again) .... and I found a place to really go foward.
I am not one to give advice, but all those who are new and finding this site I cannot tell you how much it has helped me. I did OVER READ somewhat in the beginning but managed to put all the advice and posts in a nutshell find my own place and trudge on..... just helped so much to know that I am not the only one.... not so alone with this terrible "monkey on my back" ...... he is still hanging on and not saying I won't have days that he will
But I will succeed. We all can succeed. And in the end I will be the person I once was. The person without a pill, making sure I have them with me when I leave, How many I have, when I have to order as not to run out.... etc....etc...etc...I am sure we all have our own etc'eras.......
Happy Sunday.... Relaxing Sunday.....Strong Sunday..........TO ALL....
OK, morning..can't say good quite yet. I am 48 hours out from my last Trams does of 100mg and 24 hours Trams Free. Is it over yet. Got maybe another 3-4 hours of sleep for second night in a row. RLS was severe last night but then all of sudden kinda stopped early this AM and was able to sleep.?. And the hot/cold thing subsided too. Still have mild headache lingering on, so glad its not severe or I'd be callin in to work today as I have to work again tonight. But I have off tomorrow..thank-god! Made it last night ok at work..kinda took my mind of things a bit, but of course struggling with allergies too right now not so much fun on top of everything else. Ragweed season here in Wisconsin! Lucky me!! :( No energy whatsoever and just kinda down, very irritable and anxious, but also anxious because I have to work today. Well thinking about work again and the leg starts shaking again...great..
BlessedMom-thanks for your kind words..funny thing is..both my Neurologist and my pain Management MD's both said...just STOP taking it...not NEEDED to taper down. Really, Really? So I made the decision to taper down a little at least, but thought if I did it too long I would just prolong these crappy symtoms. I just want this to be over with. The other thing is tho, since of the Analgesic Rebound Headache thing, they told not to take ANYTHING...nothing for pain..I need to flush my system clean of everything. Nothing about vitamins or like allergy stuff tho, so I still take my Zyertec and diphenhydramine at bedtime(which doesn't seem to help) and vitamins. THink I will pick up a few things today..Epsom salts and the RLS stuff. My friend might have the Melatonin for me from work. Hope this gets better. I miss my Trams! I know, but I need to stop them and thats what I have set my mind to do. Last night before bed I tried takin in deep breaths to 5-10 and thinking each time of a specific time in my life PRIOR to the trams that I functioned fine and enjoyed life like my wedding day or my honeymoon or graduation or all the other holidays and family occasions that I didn't need drugs to get me through the day or drugs to make me feel confident. I feel like I've deprived myslef of a lot these past years and mabye those close to me, like my husband(which yup me too(didnt think it could be from the trams tho)no sex drive either) Well I hope I make it through these 8 hours of work tonight and will post again in the am.
Hi everybody. I really miss you all very much... I'm on my 5th day today, TRAMADOL FREE... Too much depression, I mean I'm really very, extremely depressed. I feel like, what's the meaning of what I'm doing? I mean I'm now living with an amputated leg, and I'll pretty much always feel pain. So why am I quitting??? To be put on another F***ed up pharmaceutical, that will slowly in another way also ruin my life... Do execuse my french connection people... I'm at this point of my life where I really feel like the end is close, and like Jim Morrison said: "The future is uncertain and the end is always near!".
Hope everyone is having a good day today. It's not an easy journey, and not linear- some ups and some down days/moments, but over all at day 11 OFF- I am doing much better.
Tripper- You should soon start to feel some better. I would encourage you to maybe get on an antidepressant for a short peopid while you go through the WD. For me the sadness and depression was in the way of me sucessfully getting off these horrid pills. This time (yes- I tried to get off in May) I went to the MD and told her I was depressed and she gave me some Welbutrin. It has helped. I am VERY not OK with taking another pill- esp an antidepressant, but I also am desparate to get off this crap, so I humbled myself to get what I might need to be able to do it. Also, try to be kind to yourself.
Sweetstang- After about day 4 or 5, you will begin to feel better, but all that you describe is WD- it is horrible, but there is an end to it. It will be worth it. You want to be really present at all the events in your life- so keep going!!
When I went off trams in May, I did a taper over about 1 week from about 250 mg per day. It was VERY HARD- had all the symptoms- RLS, headaches, major foggyness, achyness, sneezing, depression, low energy, and more, but I did make if thru and stayed off for about 3 weeks, but the depression lured me back in. One day I had a lot to do and I felt so down, so I started back at JUST a 1/4 pill, then thought well, maybe just 1/2 pill per day- I can handle that (what a crock), then, OK- no more than 50 mg per day- 1 pill. Well over the course of 2 mos, I was up to 75 - 100 mg per day again and still going. I felt bad again. IT is a fact that once you get even a drop back into your system, it starts all over again. No shame though- this is a hard personal issue we all have to deal with. Some of you I know have done the same thing. It does freak me out that these pills have such a power over me. It is VERY SCARY!!
As a member of the medical profession, I can tell you that you that you will rarely come across a clinican who understands the dangers of Tranadol or the horrible WD. If I went in to my doctor and asked for Tramadol for a hangnail, the MD or the NP would probably write me an RX for it. I did not tell them about my issues- although I have a physical coming up and may do it then. Because of my profession, I feel it may be a problem for me to tell them. But how will they ever find out is not one tells them?? So we will see...
I am waiting for Day 30. I will have a party!!! Hope everyone is having a good day today. Keep fighting!! Dont give in!!!
Love and more love and prayers to you all for your continued struggles in withdrawal process. It's not easy..as you are all discovering..sometimes I had / have to take one hour at a time...because if I try/tried to take on more than that..it swallows(ed) me up. I am 65 days off booze...and 121 days off the Tramadol. Everyone is different . ..withdrawal does not look the same for all of us..so it's hard to know how to advise..there are general things like the Hylands..lot's of B vitamins..immodium, exercise..distraction in some form..but..I can tell you this..your mental functioning and brain fog..you WILL notice the difference..I cannot tell you how much better i feel mentally..the brain fog is pretty much gone...i am uncovering ...peeling away the layers..and getting to who I am..pre tramadol ..pre booze...we are talking about years of escapism in form or another.. not easy...but then who ever said it was going to be easy??? 2 steps fwd ..one step back...certainly not linear..but i can tell you that the awful feelings of uncontrollable emotions, crying..panicky feelings..darkness...anxiety, this is ALL part of this journey..so those of you feeling all this you. are spot on...move through it...one minute, one hour..one day at a time..it will pass...this i promise you.. talk about it..post, cry, feel it...remember if we give in the call of the Tram..it's back to square one..and as i see people post out here..relapse does not bring the same "highs" as it originally did..so there is great dissapointment and tendency to take more and more...it will not ever let us out of it's grips unless we take action and kick this crap to the curb.
I have such tenderness and hurt in my heart for all you struggling..but please ..know you are all bigger than Tram and you can do this...
Love, blessings & prayers for strength & courage.
Pat- Thank you for your encouragement and description of your journey. It is soooo helpful to me. Amen sister- we must "kick this crap to the curb" It must be dealt with and we must get past it- and back to being ourselves. I give thanks for everyone here who has shared their story to help some one else. You are all awesome!! WE CAN BE FREE!! Like Pat said- one day, one hour at a time.
Okay I think I lost a day or something somewhere because I thought I was on day 19 but my Tracker says I am Day 20 Tram free so I am gonna take it lol. Sorry I haven't posted or updated recently but have been busy which is a good thing. Doing pretty good of course have some lingering pesky WDs here and there but nothing major. Sleep is starting to get better at least for now, I finally got some of the Hyland's stuff and it seems to help since that is what seems to be hanging in the longest for me RLS and feeling the costant need to stretch if I am sitting. If I am standing I am good its just when I sit for more than 15-20 minutes it starts up. Would stand more but I still do have RA and the worst of it is my knees so I gotta rest them sometimes lol. The past few nights I have actually slept fairly well. It helped that my little guy wasn't paying me any nighttime visits to sleep with Mommy and Daddy. But I sleep for about 3-4 hours wake up take some tylenol because I am achy and maybe some Tums because I have been having wicked acid reflux then I am back asleep for another 3 hours or so. That is a TON better than the first couple of weeks. For those dealing with low energy, anxiety and depression I swear by St Johns Wort, 5htp and B12! I was going to pick up some melatontin this week but I may wait and see if my sleep continues to improve. I also will admit now 20 days out that about 2-3 times a day I have a moment when I am stressed and my joints are aching some and I think "A couple of Trams and I would be feeling better" but I know that is just the pills trying to pull me back. Then I think of the first 5 days of WDs and think noway am I going back there!! I can't do that to myself and just as importantly I can't do that to my family. They have been so supportive and understanding through all this I cannot and will not let them down. Also, for those of you stopping and withdrawing from this evil junk and still going to work you all just amaze me. I was lucky enough that I don't work and had my oldest daughter and then also my fiance to help me those first few days. If I had to work I would have either started taking it again or I would have had to call in sick those first 5 days. To everyone that is in the first week of kicking this stuff hang in there and know that the worst is almost over. After day 5 it does get better each day even if just by baby steps. I am almost 3 weeks off and feeling amazing. Not 100% but so much better than those first hellish days and 1000 times better than when I was on Tram. Keeping fighting because it is so worth it to get to the other side. Take care all and God bless, Lisa
Good morning all. How is everyone fairing these days? I think I am about 2 weeks tram free since my last relapse. The wellbutrin is really helping with the depression. I was sleeping really well, but last night I had really bad RLS, aches, and insomnia. I guess the effects of WD can linger, or it was just a strange night. I did take a nap yesterday so maybe that was it. Keep the faith everyone. It does get better. I am much more optomistic than I was a week ago. We can do this. I have 2 days of work this week then 6 days off in a row before my baby starts kindergarten. I am so excited for .y mini vacation. Have a great day everyone.
Hi All-I am on Day 2 Trams free and Day 3 since I took my last dose.
Can't believe I made through 2 nights of work though..not even sure how I made it, understanding co-workers I guess!! God-bless them. Hubby was in and out all weekend, so was kinda on my own for most of it. He did help out a little though. Luckily I have no kids yet, so that I'm sure makes it a ton easier.
I wish this lingering headache would just go away. At least is been real mild so far..so thank-ful for that. Was expecting the worst headaches of my life as that's what I was told...prepare for it to be worse before it gets better. I slept a little better last night. I picked up the Melatonin and Epsom salts with Lavender...popped the mela and some nyquil and the amitriptyline and took a hot bath. Was so relaxing..still woke up a bunch, legs were better, no more hot/cold thing going on. A litte GI discomfort yesterday, and still NO, NO energy. Still kinda feel like I was hit by a bus. So glad I have off today and have nothing I really need to get done other than maybe trying to walk the dog and going through tons of mail, magazines. Looking forward to a show tonight, so it helps when I have something to focus on, other than..pill popping times.
Yesterday I did notice on my way to and from work, I found myself once again jamming to some Lady Ga Ga and some other songs that I once listened to Prior to Trams and how I don't NEED these pills anymore, I had a life before them and I intend on getting back to the drug-free life! Just wish I could get some energy back and rid of this headache. Hope everyone else is doing ok. Hang in there gang, I am feeling better and hope each day gets better and better!!!
AGHHHHH I think I may be prolonging my symptoms. this is HELL! Peoples!
Hot/cold, anxiety, RLS, constant stretching, sneezing, feeling tremors etc.
I am still at 1 1/4- 1/12 a day
Today I took only 1/4 a pill in the am and was going to do 1/4 pill 3 more times as I was going to make another jump but dang nab it. The low energy, anxious feeling. This *****!!!!
I HATE THIS STUFF!!!!!
Can someone tell me if its just worth it to do 1/2 a time instead of a quarter?
I CANNOT believe how hard this is. It wasn't this painful at the beginning when I was cutting back but now that I am on 1 1/4- 1 1/2 it is hell every change I make.
And the fact that I can't take 5 htp or anything else makes it even harder. :(
I must say I just want this baby so I can have my meds back. NOOOOOO bad thinking!!!! I have to get off this crap.
I need to go get more rescue remedy or something.
I read some of your posts on here saying you are still having symptoms a month out and it freaks me out. I can't imagine going through another month of hell after I finally make the jump to be free.
Why does this stuff have its hook in me so deep!
Can someone who tapered tell me if it really makes that much difference if you do 1/2 at a time instead of the 1/4. I feel like I am almost prolonging the enevitable!
but I have a baby in me to worry about too.
I hope everyone is doing better then me right now.
Its not completely unbearable but pretty dang uncomfortable off and on. For me what seems to help with the sleep though is cutting my dose in 4 doses instead of three and space them as long as I can.
I tried to go to 3 x a day and that didn't cut it.
So today will be 1/4, 1/4, 1/4, 1/4 4-6 hours spaced apart. CAN I DO IT! Makes me want to cry thinking about it!!
Love and hugs to all you amazing people. Why can't I be as strong as most of you. I am a weany!!!
I cut back my tylonal as well because I was getting up to 4 a day and I really don't want that in babys system either.
I am so tempted to ask my dr about getting darvocet to finish the weaning process and deal with the pain.
DEPRESSION??? I'm down to two 1/2 pills/day now and doing ok, other than the typical WD stuff, but I can deal w physical discomfort. I need to know from you all who have quit, does the depression hit after your last pill? I remember last time it seemed to me the depression started a day or two after i think? thus far, I have not had depression so was thinking maybe i'll get lucky this time? But it's sounding to me like it 's gonna happen, after I'm totally clean of the tram, and I'm soo scared ! Please tell me about your experiences with the depression. Have you all had this experience? if so, how long does it last, because for me, it was debillitating and is what caused me to start again. i'm taking b vits, l tyrosine, samE, and have some 5htp to start after my last pill. But wondering if I should go ahead w an antidepressant, as I know they take few weeks to kick in? I honestly cannot go through few weeks of that kind of depression! I hate the zombie feeling of antidepressants and wound rather not take them, but if that's what I have to do to get off this crap, so be it. Please give me all your experiences and advice on this!! thank you all again...you have helped soooo much!!
ps. do you notice that when you have two halves for the day, you figure which is the larger half and take it!!?? lol
Lyn~the depression is what made me relapse. Not everyone has the depression though. I went on wellbutrin after the last relapse 2 weeeks ago, and it really has heped. it doesnt have the zombie effect on me like the other ADs do. Supplements alone may help you though if you are not prone to depression.
Hi All-sorry kinda of low activity on here it seems. But I do feel I have to vent,, Think it was easier when I was at work, just sitting here by myself sulking at home...at least hubby will be home soon and I have my cats and dog.
Its weird..this is the middle of Day 3 for me, but I just get small bursts of energy(with music or talking with someone) and I feel like oh, Im on my way out, then its 180deg..suddenly debbie downer...sulking. Feel depressed with no ambition to get up. Hate this roller coaster ride, just want to get off this ride now! Thinking how do normal people without meds function. I know I did it once before, but seems unattainable right now.
My friend from work who is a recovering alcholic/drug abuser has been checkin up on me. He called me this am and made my day. He's doing great..I hope to get there one day too. Time is going quickly it seems tho, so hopefully it won't be long before I'm a normal functioning person again...I hope!! Just frustrating when you read weeks, months out that people still have some of these symptoms, feelings...really, what do we have to look forward to then? Trying to get into a therapist I saw last year, maybe that would help talking to her, not sure if that is her area tho. We'll see, give it a shot right.
Oh, fun fact..realized I had a MD apt today...oops, forgot about that one. Guess I'll have to reschedule that one,,not even a phone call saying.."um ya, U had an 8:30apt today..where are Ya?" just home detoxing!
I hope you are all doing well and hanging in there.
lyn ~ Your ps note about the halves made me laugh!! I did that too!! Did the same when I got down to quarters as well! :P
sweetstang ~ In response to your comment "what do we have to look forward to then?" .....Being FREE of this drug!!! And not to mention, a better understanding of yourself and your abilities to overcome something this big. Keep at it, it will get better!
blessedmommy ~ You're doing great. Just remain focused and determined to do what you need to do for yourself, family and your soon-to-be new addition. Can you possibly spread your times out farther? Maybe that would help? That's how I did it (although I wasn't pg). For me, I would lower a dose, then days later I would increase the length of time by an hour, then later decrease the dose, then increase by another hour....etc. My cell phone alarm was my best friend for months....had to set it to remind me to take my doses at exact times....even during the nite. This worked well for me. If you decide to dot that, just find something to help occupy that extra hour (or however long you decide) so that your mind is somewhere else and not focused on any potential discomfort.....read a magazine, watch a tv show, go for a walk, run an errand...etc.
For everyone still struggling..... When I went to bed last nite, I got to thinking about something. It was around this time last year that I had found this site and Emily's wonderful journal. I would sit for hours and read story after story, struggle after struggle, success after success. I so longed to be one of the people that had won their fight with this horrible drug. I envied everyone that was doing well and wanted to be in that position, too. Now here I am....I am one of them. Think about that!!! YOU WILL BE HERE TOO!!! YOU will soon be one of those that is telling the newcomers that IT CAN BE DONE!
All that said, I do still have my blah days, but it feels sooo much better than being a slave to those pills!!! Would I love to have those 7 years to do over? Maybe... However, having gone thru all of that, I know so much more about myself and what I am capable of and more importantly, that I never want to go back there again.
Lastly, I am not an overly religious person by any stretch of the imagination and I understand that many people are not, as well....but I happened upon another bible verse that I feel I should share for those of you that are struggling. Maybe it will help you thru another day.
1 Cor. 10:13
...God is faithful and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
A lot going on in this journal. I have been moving so I have been extremely busy but started catching up with posts yesterday. WOW, congratualations to all of you making such progress!!
I am off Tram now since April 15th after a 7 year 400 mg a day habit. I HAVE NOT experienced depression. I have definitely had really bad days (this move and associated stress really brought out some bad days that I am yet learning to deal with). But I have had many more REALLY good days, without worrying about if I have enough Tram, counting pills, spending way too much money on a horrible pill, forgetting where I parked or forgetting everything for that matter, and you know...this list goes on.
To all of the taperers out there; that is also how I did it. Down to a quarter of a pill or 12.5mg. Yes, it gets harder because it is a larger decrease of a smaller volume so even though it is only a small amount, it is a higher percentage that you are cutting out of your system. My advice to BLESSEDMOMMY is to try spreading out the hours in between doses, even if it is only by one hour per day. You can still try decreasing doses by a small amount but I think decreasing frequency also helps (and you can easily talk yourself into just one more hour before the next dose). No matter what my dear, you have made great progress!!
For those of you in PAWS (which does include me still) I have found exercise to be most helpful. Often I force myself just to start, even if its a quick walk, but if I am feeling OK I keep going, or make it a run. I really think it works. As a matter of fact think I am now addicted to running, but hey, that is OK :) I have done 2 10K's and a triathlon over the summer. I promise it can be done (and I am in my late 40s).
Pat, you sound great!!!! I am glad your travels went well!
To all of you, my thoughts are with you. I know how difficult this battle is but also know you get to the other side much quicker than you think you can. All of sudden you are looking back from the other side, and it is a great view!
lol your comment made me laugh as YES I do the same exact thing!!!!!
Figuring out which 1/2 or in my case 1/4 is bigger.
Depression can be helped thru diet, fish oils and amino acids, extra b's and for sure vit D. Please get some 5htp to start and some b vit and D and cod liver oil or fish oil. and then get the book "the mood cure" I have been too busy with planning school lately that I havne't even opened it but my hubby is reading it for me and its amazing and tons of success stories in it. I can't take any of the supplements yet because i am pg so this is the only reason why I haven't.
My dh struggles with depression too and he is on 5 htp and its working. So there are options for you instead of more meds if you want. you are doing great! Keep it up.
You are such a breath of fresh air! I adore you! Thank you so much for your words of encouragement! And the scriptures are awesome keep em coming. you know I have to admit that I was a STRONG Christian before this stuff and it really changed me. I read my bible daily and then after I got on trams I figured hey I don't really need God as much anymore to depend on. I have these wonderful pills that help my anxiety, depression, pain and give me energy all rolled into one. HOW HORRIBLE!
I realize through this I need to go back to God and get the words of wisdom and comfort. Sorry if this offends anyone not meaning to! Its just my personal choice.
Others we can do this!! For me being down to 1 1/4 a day it does NOTHING for pain anymore! So the only reason why I need it now is depression/anxiety and to ward off withdrawls. I hate that. Well my OB decided to give me darvocet today. The last couple days have been bad for pain. REALLY bad which makes me all the more depressed and last night I couldn't walk I was glued to the couch. So I took the darv. Funny how he thinks darv is more addicting then trams. NOT!!!! I have been addicted to both and darv is WAYYYY easier to get off.
So what I am going to do is use darvocet to help with my taper. I am going to try and just take 1/2 tram the next few days in 1/4 pill increments and 2 darvocet a day for the next 4-5 days and see how that helps with my pain and withdrawls.
I have to admit I took a darvocet earlier when I picked up my script and I feel a bit loopy so it does seem stronger as far as pain med go for me at this point as I am able to get up now without crying in pain. I don't know why I am having a flair in pain again ughh. I was doing good for 3-4 days.
I CANNOT be in this much pain as it sends my blood pressure up and my emotions become out of control. I figure once I completely wean off tram then going off the darv should be MUCH easier. Does anyone now? Of course depending on how long I stay on it. I have 30 pills of darvocet he most likely will give me more but..... I do NOT want baby to go through withdrawls. He said if I stay at 1-2 a day baby will be fine. It still terrifies me.
Anyway has anyone come off tram this way?
Today I took 1/4 a pill of tram at 6 am and then 1/4 pill at 10 am and then a darvocet at 2 ish and it wiped out ALL my w/d. I feel soooo much better. Not sure what my plan is tonight for my last dose of whatever wether I should go on 1/2 a tram or another darv. Any ideas would be appreciated.
Sad it is to say my doctor doesn't think tramadol is very addicting. He was very willing to give me the darvocet being I was crying and he sees me not walking well though so that is good. He said there has only been one case reported that he can find of baby w/d from tramadol and she was on between 200-400 mg a day.
Gosh I can't wait to get off this stuff! I PRAY my pain is better after baby is born.
You all have amazing strength. Can you imagine how much better we will feel if we can beat this stuff? Wouldn't it be soooo awesome to be free from the lies of tramadol? The perfect feel good pill that takes all the pain away. NOT!!! I HATE YOU TRAMADOL!!!! More then you know!
Love to all and keep up the good work peoples! Lets fight this evil monster for good!
Yea actually, I did use darvocet to get off of tramadol a few years back. It did help. Sad to say I got clean off of tramodol which was the hardest thing I ever done, then got hurt and ended up getting addicted to Norco. I am now day 3 clean off of norco and am having bad withdrawals, but nothing close to the ones I had on tramadol. when I used the darvocet to get off of tramadol it worked. I also was pregnant during a period in time with my addiction to tram and my doctor gave me vicodin. I liked tram way more because of the energy, but I was terrified of what it would do to my baby. Its in a class that is very dangerous for you during pregnancy. I looked it up on line while I was pregnant and took a class on some medications and it scared the living crap out of me, i used vicodin and darvocet and throught he tramadol away. I can tell you now, getting off of tram was fifty times harder than what I am going threw now getting off of vicodin. So hang in there, It will defenitly be worth it. Yes the Good Lord has a way of teaching us lessons, and Hes defenitly taught me a life lesson with this one. God bless pray for me as I pray for you
Finished up day 21 Tram free and feeling well good and bad lol. My day for the most part was quite good as I did my normal stuff throughout the day and felt fine. Then about 11pm this evening I started to feel pretty lousy. My legs started twitching more than they have in the past week and the arthritis in my knees started hollering at me. I took some Excedrin and Hylands for my legs but I just kept feeling worse. I wanted so much to lay down but my sweet stubborn 4 yr old decided he wants to play night owl tonight ughhhh. So I was sitting cruising on Facebook when my brain started chanting "Trams, Trams, Trams, Trams!" Ackkkkkkkk!! First of all let me say I DO NOT have access to this med right now thank goodness! None in the house and noone near by that could provide me any. If I really wanted to get any I would have to be on line and it would be Thursday at the earliest before I could. I know all of this because as the Tram demons were talking to me I was thinking of all there scenarios! So I got my sore self up and did a little around the house and stretched my legs really good and jumped into a hot shower. Now two hours later I am feeling back to where I should be and the Tram demons have been chased away. That was my first really hard craving I have had so far but I am glad I was able to re focus myself and get through it. I also have purposely put safe guards in place where I have a bit of a safety net for myself. I do not have ANY narcotic pain meds in the house, anyone close to me that does have any (there are 3) know that I got myself off my pain meds and know that I do not want them to give or offer me any and finally my fiance has my Visa card so I can't order on line if I am so tempted. While I know at just 21 days off of Tram there are still going to be a ton of pot holes to manuver through the way I feel today is a 1000 times better than my best day on Trams. I hope everyone is fairing well and hanging in there. Those early in this fight just know there is a light at the end of the tunnel and its amazing to stand in it when you get there ;o) Take care and God bless, Lisa
Hello Everyone. I have been a lurker for 26 days. Without you I don't know if I would have known it was the Tramadol that was making me feel unwell. I have been taking 50mg twice a day for about a year. My doctor assured me there would be no wd in that small of a dose. I never really increased my dose, maybe taking one more a day infrequently which I told my Dr. about. I started to feel unwell and uncomfortable in the afternoons before my 2nd dose. I had felt kind of unwell and buried in myself so after finding these posts,I had a gut feeling it was poison. I did a quick 5 day taper and jumped off. It has been hard but everyday I would come and find wisdom and encouragement from all of you. Most days I just wanted to find someone on the same day as me and see how they were. Yesterday DAY 26 was a breakthrough day for me. The unbelievable sadness and depression have been the worst for me. The shallow breathing and freezing/sweating are still in full effect as of 2 days ago. The depression part is awful. I just want to say to anyone who is listening.It is NOT normal depression, it is lifting...finally...so a part of this drug wd. I really wondered if I would ever feel normal again. Yesterday afternoon the sun came out for me. yeah!! I could not have done this without the ministering angel/tramadol warriors. Thank you so much for the info on the randomness and non linear path of the wd and that xanax could prolong the healing. My heart is filled with gratitude for the help and support. Even as a lurker, I felt it.ha.
well day 3 here clean. Feels like forever though. Have a lurking/lingering headache which I wish would leave! Feeling ok, actually slept last night, which felt great. Still very difficult gettin out of bed every AM. Just feel so fatiqued and drained..like a walking zombie. Music has been helping me though, playing some favorite songs, new and old and old being a time when I didn't depend on a little white pill to get me through. Kinda gets me in a better mood. Still have cravings for those pills though, don't have any though, which is good. Doesn't help that my mom takes them and some people I work with. I know I wouldn't want to go through the last week again though. But just hate this lethargic feeling. Legs still twitch a little, but much better than the first 48hours, no more hot/cold stuff..just tired, legs crampy, sad and have this damn headache.
Thank you angelmoon for telling us your story, as you are an encouragement to me and i'm sure will be for others. As many of us have verbalized, the depressions is the worst and scarriest part of this whole ordeal. It's so good to hear that you DO come out of it, although 26 days seems like an impossible feat to conquer with that kind of sadness. I also wonder if the duration interms of number of years we've been on it will draw out the depression? My husband keeps reminding me we are all different and maybe I will not even have the depression this time ( I know the truth of that tho). I'm so glad the sun started shining for you! I remember that horrible deep depression...remember that it took everything I had to pick up kids from school, and remember when I gave up and took a pill, it was like the sun came out and I could function, all within a half hour time! It helps so much to know that it will go away, and is NOT normal, and we CAN get through it!
it's so comforting to me that you all have some of the same crazy stuff going on ! ie: taking the bigger half of the tram pill, and obsessing about it all day, and when I can take it, and can I just go one more hour or will I go insane!?? All these insane feelings I used to think were just ME, and would have never dared to tell anyone because they would know I was a OCD, psycohpathic crazy woman! But I had a hunch you all would get it! lol
Blessedmommy, you are doing wonderful and keep strong! I am an OB nurse of 13 years, and want to reassure you that I have seen many babies born to alcoholic, drug addicted (cocaine, meth, etc, cigarettes, etc) moms and you would be surprised how well they do and how strong those little newborns are! The placenta does filter quite a bit out, and also some stress also matures the babies lungs. That 's no excuse to NOT keep trying and weaning, bcuz we know that some amt gets to baby, but honestly I'm sure your baby is just fine. My OB doc handed out ultram like candy (still does even tho i've tried to convince her this crap is super addictive), and I have not seen any ill effects to the babies , at least not in newborn stages. also, I have experienced the same spiritual desert you have over the last seven years. I kept asking God why he wasn't there for me, and he kept convicting me to get off the tram and I would hear him again...but I loved the trams more at the time and wasn't willing to sacrifice them. Part of my journey here has to do with a conviction that i just could not ignore any longer...it's time for me to start hearing/feeling God in my life as well as feeling for everyone else around me, but most of all for myself! keep on keepin on....hour to hour , minute to minute, and I KNOW God will get us through!
thank you onedaynow and myfreedom for such encouraging posts! you help me make it through the day! I wish we could all meet somehow as I feel like we all have a special bond and compassion for one another.
ps. my husband gives me my one tram a day b4 work, and always sets in in same place....i find myself looking over there quite often just to make sure it's still there....it's kinda like looking at a picture of a loved one for motivation to keep going....how sick is that!?
pss. is it ok to take DHEA when still on tram, or need to wait? can you take DHEA and wellbutrin? thx
In the early stages of this post I remember reading one step foward and two back.
I have hit day 23 and not only stepped back I have totally fallen.
It only took one small incident to spiral a sadness that I can't even believe. The thoughts I have .......
And only just a few days ago I was posting positive things. If only I knew the magic number...number of days till this is over. The number of hours I will feel this overwhelming depression.
I have therapy today and I don't even have the strength to tell what I am feeling.
The only positive note is I really dont "crave"..... I don't want the pill to fix it. I don't trust what I am feeling to make any decisions and this ....... limbo....... waiting to feel normal.
I still have a hard time thinking... foggy.... like I am watching all this. Physical symptoms come and go, dealing with them is a breeze now compared to this spiral of sadness. The harder I try and think to pull out of it .....
I guess this is where slow and steady come into play.....
My therapist knows everything...so I will drag my weary self to that appointment.
Just give me a small sense of strength and courage to get through this day.......a glimmer of what my life is from here on.
I'm so sorry to hear you have hit such a low spot, but you have to tell yourself it WILL get better!! Tomorrow is a new day, and this WILL NOT last forever! I know it's so difficult to believe when you feel like you do but you have to know it somewhere deep down inside..try to talk , as much as it seems impossible in this state.....talk to your spouse/friend/counseller.....make yourself take a walk....just remember all you've been through and DO NOT go back there! did you read the post from angelmoon above? 26 days and the clouds lifted and sun began to shine again....you too will see the light again! Try not to lie around thinking too much, you know it will only make things worse. Just get through today, and tomorrow will be better! Hang in there, I'm praying for you right now!
Hello Tram Warriors!!
I am now on day 12 and today is a good day- so far. For me, it has been the evenings that are terrible. It seems like when I am tired, that sadness sneaks in and I just want to go to bed- but of course I wake up at 4a....But I am so so thankful to be on day 12 and off those horrible pills for good. I can so relate to all your stories - I have done ALL the things described here and probably more. I have driven back home when I forgot my pill box, hunted in every pocket of my purse for a 1/2 or 1/4 pill, looked for pills in my jewelry box (my secret place to stash them), and combed through my car for a tram. I so can relate to you Lyn, looking over to see your one pill laying there!! It is really messed up to think that way, but we all have these stories of what it has done to us.
The depression is very on and off for me. There are times I feel good and can think that everything will be OK, and then 2 hours later, I am a mess, wondering why I am trying to get off the Trams- they made me feel so good.....or did they??? It is such a lie they tell. Dont let the depression push you back into it- work through it- get busy- I believe we will come out on the other side like angelmoon, myfreedom and so many others here that tell their story. Our brains must learn how to make all the appropriate chemicals again and to heal. Be gentle with yourself during the down spells. It will take a little time, but healing will come!!
Okay a new day.... Day 24....
Thank you all for the kind thoughts yesterday and the invites...they mean a lot.
I will go foward today. Therapy yesterday helped with lengthy explainations of brain chemistries and levels.
I knew I had a long road from my length and amount of abuse of this pill, so I will continue to wait for my magic number day. I am gonna talk to my pharmacist today about interactions of l-tyrosine and some of my cardiac meds and make sure that I am okay to start taking that. One step at a time.
I will post more in the day....
Starting day 23 Tram free today and am so dragging this morning. Wish I could get an IV of coffee right now lol. I probably would have slept decent last night but have been having problems with some very nasty acid reflux. Not even the OTC acid reducer I have been taking is cutting it. May just have to keep my diet a little bland for a few days, I have been there done that before since this is a problem I have had way before I even started taking Tramadol. Anyway, on a up note other than feeling and probably looking like the walking dead everything else is going very good ;o) Aside from a passing anxious moment or two a day that last only about 5-10 minutes I have been feel pretty great. Still have the stretchy, twitchy feeling in my legs if I sit to long so well I just try not to sit to long lol. Still taking all of my suppliments and vitamins of course. If I could just get a couple of good nights sleep in I think the fatigue would also be a lot better too. For those of you two weeks or more out having a good day then bad day and such from everything I have read on this forum and elsewhere try to remember that recovering from this evil pill is not linear, it more random unfortunately. I also keep in my mind whenever I am having a week or bad moment, do I really want to have to go back and repeat those hellish first 5 days again??? I don't think so! Also I want to say I am eternally grateful for this forum for the help and support and even just the other stories here. If this had not been here I can honestly say I don't think I would have made it this far. I probably would have just suffered through those first few days of WDs and then got a refill the next week when I was able too. But now because all of this was here and by God's good grace I found it, I can now say I am 3 weeks clean from Tramadol.
Sweetstang: Hang in there hun! You are about start that upward swing really soon here and it is going to be worth it Just keep in mind no matter how horrible you feel you will NOT always feel like this. It will seem like you will sometimes but honestly this point in time is only temporary, you are going to feel much better and you are going to move forward.
Angelmoon: Yes! Isn't so wonderful when that sun finally does break through those clouds for the first time!! It's an amazing feeling and I am so glad to got there. Keep up the fight!
MammaK: I am so sorry you are still struggling hun but I am glad you have a therapist you can talk with and confinde in. Your day is coming soon I am sure of it. I have dealt with depression in the past before Tramadol even entered my life and I so understand it is not a nice place to be. I don't know if you have tried any of the natural remedies for depression and if so and you contiue to experience this horrible cloud you may want to consider maybe a low dose of precription AD. There is no shame in that at all. It is a much better route to go than to possibly relapse back onto Tram just to escape the depression. Hang in there and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
Beth: You are doing amazing! Big kudos to you lady! And I am with you on evenings being the rough time of the day but I would rather take those rough times than to ever have to go back to being a slave to that evil pill again. Keep up the wonderful work!
Well all I am off to chip away at the mountain of laundry sitting in front of my washing machine right now. Keep up the good fight all and remember there WILL be better days ahead for all of us! Blessings, Lisa
Lisa-I am dragging a bit today myself. I have 6 whole days off in a row and am going stir crazy already. How is everyone today? I am posting from a real computer today, rather than my phone, so hopefully the puctuation and spelling is better.
I think I am 17 days tram free. As with most other, the lingering depression has been the worst withdrawal effect for me. I started the wellbutrin 2 weeks ago Monday and it has really helped, besides making me feel a bit manic at times. I did not want to try effexor or anything too harsh, because I felt the depression wasn't bad enough to warrant it, but I know the ingredients in effexor are closest to the ingredients in tramadol's AD.
I hope everyone is doing well today and healing. Beth-I agree that evenings are the worst for me as well. I am totally exhausted and extremely short on patience, which doesn't bode well when you are the mother of a 5 year old live wire.
My little one starts school on Tuesday, and I am incredibly nervous, as she is my only child and probably the only one I will ever have. I am 33, and we are just not financially stable enough for another one. But enough of my ramblings.
In the beginning, I missed tramadol and how it made me feel so badly that I thought the sun would never shine again. It is a false feeling however, and a feeling so false that while on it I couldn't cry, smile, laugh, do anything. Last night, while watching Glee re-runs, I cried about 3 times (music in general does that to me). It is like the emotion is finally coming back and I do see glimpses of my old personality coming back. I do feel like the prolonged use of tramadol has emotionally and mentally scarred me for life, and that scares the hell out of me. I am basically a very negative person, who never sees the good in any situation, and I am trying desperately to remedy that-for myself and my childs sake. How does one do this? Any books, websites, info would be greatly appreciated. My mom is an extremely negative person, and I am shaping up to be exactly like her, and that scares me too. The wellbutrin is helping me with the loss of energy and depression, but the negativity still remains. I guess it was masked by the tram for a long time.
I am aware that my relapses were due to the depression caused by the lack of tram, so I am extremely glad to be on an antidepressant. I still crave the tram, but not as much as I used to, and I know I can never go back to that. I want to feel again, and to live and be happy-the same that all of us want.
I do feel that we can all overcome this horrible drug, and that this website, and Emily have helped me more than anything. I am forever greatful to all of you for all of your advice and support. Everyone keep your chin up and know that tomorrow will be a better day, and that we may not have much energy, but it will come back. We may feel down, but things will get better, because if we stay off the tram, we are ourselves again-regaining control of our lives and emotions. Peace and love to you all.
I'm glad i found this thread as i am going through getting off of Tramadol. Unfortunately i have an addictive personality and history. 9 years ago i finally admitted that i was addicted to opiates over a 5 year period of which my family had no idea i was taking them. I decided that i would get cleaned up and went to a 28 day inpatient program. Withdrawals were horrible although they gave me buprenorphene for 3 days then "turned me loose". I relasped 3 more time before i grabbed hold of the NA/AA program and made it 5 1/2 years clean. Wife had Tramadol and i snuck one and it was on for the next 10 months. Now i am about 2 1/2 weeks w/o Tramadol. I found a doctor that set me up with Subutex. I had never heard of anyone using that for Tramadol but he said it would work. He proscribed 1 1/2 8mg sublinqually 2x a day. I took the first dose and was plastered! I nearly took myself to emergency i felt so bad. Called him and he told me to take just 1/2 of a 8mg tab next dose. I feel because i wasn't really on an opiod the Subutex was practically an overdose. The half pill was tolerable was tolerable. So for the next 13 days i tapered down from 1/2 2x a day to 1/8 1x a day and then done. Surprisingly i was able to sleep fine and had no i'll effects except the brain zap, which is still there. It has lessened and i hope that it will go completely. I asked the doctor when i saw him again if he had ever given Subutex for Tramadol patients and he said 1 quite a while ago. I almost feel like he hadn't given it to a Tramadol user by his body language. No matter. It did help tremendously. The surprising news i got from you guys is how Tramadol effects the receptors of the brain and how randomly it does that. It would explain, possibly, the restless "body" syndrome that happened to me last night after day 16 of no Tram and nothing like that. It has been 5 days since the last Subutex dose and the restless thing shows up. Really wierd. The depression also popped up as well about 2 days prior to the restless body issue. I would have though that i would be past that. Anyone else have a similar experience? I will be calling the doc although i really don't think he totally understands what is going on. I will see what he says. I don't want anymore pills to get me right. Although i feel a little restless right now @3pm i'm hoping that i can get more sleep than i did last night. I know time will help. I've done this before and it was a lot worse than this time. For those who are afraid i understand. Nobody likes to be uncomfortable. Good luck to those who are going through WD.
Well, today is day 4 for me. Wow..its been officially 5 days since my last dose. I work 2 jobs and was super nervous going to work today as I had to get up early and its almost inevitable I would get a headache working at this place, its usually so stressful. But I made it, had a mild headache when I finished work which I would have normally gotten to my car..water in hand to wash down my 2 trams. I felt empty and wanting them...as usually by the time I got home from work I was raring to go again for housework, walking the dog, etc. It took everything to do the usual chores I need to get done. I keep having this spirts of energy and absolutely lethargic feelings. Wish it would just even out.
For me personally, mornings are worse for me. My "formal-normal" routine was get up..take 2 trams...30min later I was ready to take on the day. Now I just wake up not wanting to get out of bed..so hard to get going. On a good note however, I have slept pretty good the last two nights. I think the Melatonin is helping..and the RLS is much better. Just so fatigued and comprehend how other "clean" people in the world function without the help of say our little "magic" pills? So not used to NOT counting my pills out, making sure I have them with me, etc. Kinda of nice, but I still miss them.
Actually took my dog for a decent walk to night, even jogged..ya for like a few minutes here and there, but I was told by my therapist(which I decided to give a call into after reading other posts on here..and thank-you!!) and she said one of the best things for depression is...exercise. Just very difficult to get going though..once I was walking, I was ok though.
Lisa..thanks for much for your nice words and encouragement..it means a lot!!
booba-I have to say I am in total agreement with you..I myself am a very negative person as well. I hate it, and my husband is completely opposite. To him..things could be so much worse. Well to me..things could be so much better! Why settle in life....? He sees the bright side..I see the down side. I try not to be like that either, but I have a hard time changing. I too, find myself to have certain emotions come out too. I watch something on TV, doesn't matter what and I find myself tearing up over the slightest things. I did however last night at work...LAUGH...and I mean LAUGH OUT LOUD LAUGH..with my fellow co-workers and on like 2 different occasions..I was cracking up....without Mr. Trams guest starring! Makes me giggle thinking about it again.
Well the one joke was..I'll share. My friend Keith(the recovered alcholic/drug user) uses Netflix like myself...well Keith has a habit of not logging off of his Netflix while at work. Well at least 2 instances, I had gone to Netflix, and what do ya know..Keith's Netflix page opens up. Well..I just go and ADD a few nice movies for him!! Mind you he rides a motorcycle and likes rock music. So I add a little Hannah Montana..some care bares movies, maybe some Brittany Spears...no Netflix doesn't have porns...LOL....he actually got one of the movies sent to his house right away. Just the funniest things...just a little fun!!
HEEELLPPPP!!! I am only 33 hours tram free and its torture!
I even have darvocet to help me through 2-3 a day and OMG I am living what I was hoping to avoid! HOW can i be having such severe w/d when I have darv for a replacement? I was taking 1 1/2 a day and then went to 1 1/4 a day for 2 days and then 1/2 a day for 2 days then I jumped but OMGosh the anxiety outa body experience is unreal!!! I would have figured that being on such a low dose I could jump! WOW!!
I am hot/cold anxious SEVERELY anxious off and on my muscles keep tightening including my uterus. Contractions all day!!! I thought for sure i was in labor! I layed down took some benadryl and they subsided but wow!
Please someone tell me when the severe anxious crawling outa your skin gets better. I can handle the lethargy, hot cold flu stomach cramps, headache but the anxiousness and muscle twitching crawling outa my skin anxiety i cant handle!!
It's a feeling i cant even explain! Just severe restlessness or something!
How many days of this will i have? Does it get easier each day or harder? What day is the worst?
Please pray baby stays in i am only 35 weeks. Dr said i can have 2-3 a day of darvocet for my pain but i HAD to take 3 today and i feel terrible because of it :( He has nooo clue what tram has on me. He honestly thinks its no biggie to switch over completely! WHAt?!! Dont they know yet? This stuff is aweful compared to other meds i have been on!
Please someone tell me what to excpect? If it gets much worse I am going to have to cave in and take 1/2 tram on top of the darv and i was hoping not to do that!
YUCK!!! This stinks!
Dear Blessed, hope you are at least not feeling worse by now. The withdrawals you have now are from the Effexor side of tramadol. I would love to be able to give you a schedule of how it will go from now but it seems to be more random than not.
You should start having some good days soon but if it's causing you major stress, I would consider going back onto the half dose & tapering more slowly. Your taper was very rapid whereas a slow taper would involve staying at one dose for a week or even two before dropping down. You can also taper down further from one half to one quarter and even one eighth.
For anyone interested in changing their way of thinking, I recommend cognitive behaviour therapy as a good place to start. It's easier to see a counsellor to get you started & here in Australia, this is now covered by Medicare but if you don't have access to a CBT counsellor, here's a good online site where you can work through the exercises on your own:
Hi everyone! I haven't posted much lately, but you are all in my thoughts and prayers. I just read over some of your posts, and I am amazed at how much help and support is out there now because of Emily's journal! WOW!
Don't give up if you are having a hard time right now. Tramadol is VERY hard to get off of. I am 6 months clean today, and I honestly feel great. It is worth the fight that it takes to stop it!!!
Day 25 and doing okay. Overwelming sadness has backed off some. I went out yesterday and kept myself busy all day. Really had my doubts a few days ago. But as we all have read in posts, it does get better. I am sure of my ups and downs that will be lurking but I will try and stay strong in mind. I still want to stress how much these posts have helped me. I think of you all many times a day and it reminds me that I am not alone in this fight.
I don't feel like I have been very helpful to anyone in this journal other than venting and whining. I hope that in the future I will be more of a inspiration to someone. Although I guess thats not the goal of this post, only my nature as a "caregiver". Hard for me to lean on someone else. But I am grateful for you all ......
Hoping for a successful day for all.... hour for all....
42 hours tram free. WOW what an afernoon/evening yesterday. I am feeling better at the moment just tremory and anxious still.
I may have to break down and take 1/4 or something. I DO NOT want to go into labor yet. But for now I am just taking it easy.
I looked up effexor withdrawls and that is EXACTLY what I am feeling. It is REALLY weird! I am waiting for the severe depression to kick in and it hasn't yet. It actually was when I was tapering but I haven't cried yet since jumping off. Too anxious to cry. :) thank you for sharing about the effexor thing.
I NEVER want another drug to have power over me like this again.
I can't believe doctors think this stuff is so minor.
I have a feeling tram has a lot of secrete we still haven't figured out but I definately think its effexor related somehow because that is how I feel. I am not craving it for narcotic like effects I am craving it for #1 energy and #2 to ward off the awful w/d.
I slept for 7 hours last night woke up a few times but no restless leg or need to stretch. Hmmm maybe I am getting somehwere? I had to take benadryl though.
It took FOREVER to go to sleep.
Anyone notice afternoons/evenings are the worst? I wonder why? But the anxiousness for me right now is pretty much lasting all day. :(
You are all doing so awesome. I too hope I will be more of an inspiration instead of a whiny sniveling basket case.
Thank you all for your support I have to admit its hard to see posts where people are still struggling alot a month out. When I am only 2 days out. A month seems like FOREVER to feel like this. :(
Day 5 here..doing ok. tired, headache and legs are crampy. But doing ok. I wish the best for everyone..first 48 hours was definatley the hardest. Seems to get better after that. Just can't wait to feel good again.
Hi all. Checking in. Another sleepless nite. Two nights in a row. 21 days from last Tramadol and 7 days from last 2mg Subutex. Depression kicked in as soon as i stopped the Subutex.The sleeplessness and RLS 5 days after the Subutex baffles me. I would have thought that after 2 days without the Sub and no sleep or restlessness issues it would be clear sailing so i threw the remaining 5 pills of Sub away cuz i didn't want to be tempted to take them later for "fun". Maybe i should have held on to them. I made an appointment to see my doc this afternoon so i'll tell him whats going on and he can make a decision on what i should do instead of me trying to figure out how i will keep from blowing my top. Going through this and still going to work is REALLY tough. The fact is i am not getting hardly anything done at work while i'm here because i can't concentrate. 4-5 hours of sleep over a 2 day period does not make one the sharpest tool in the shed. But it does keep me from sitting around the house dwelling on whats going on with me, so that is good. My heart is out to you who are making the effort to get back to a drug free existance. It is definitely worth it. I'm trying to remind myself that this is really a very short period in my life and once this is past then i will be free! No counting pills, no dealing with the online sites and trying to keep track of who i ordered from and when i can order from them again, no more worrying if i will have enough pills to get me through the weekend or a family vacation, no more non-existant sex life, standing in front of the toilet trying to **** for minutes at a time. Good times. Logic plays zero part in this insane set of circumstances. And it happens soo subtley that by the first time you realize your running low on pills all of the aforementioned behaiviors are already ruling your life and you didn't even know it. At least it was that way for me. Insidious.
Sweetstang, your a trooper. My hats off to you.
Blessedmommy8, hang in there, listen to your doc, and pray a lot.
I am on day 14!!! I am so so thankful for everyone here and count you all in on my success thus far. I have a bad cold, so I am not really surer about my energy, but I feel I am doing well. My depression seems to be much better, although it comes and goes. I will be busy ts weekend with my family, so it will be interesting. I believe I will make it now!
All of you out there in the first week of WD, just hand in there! It will get better!
Can any body whos been of Tramadol longer then a month tell me when they regained there full energy. I am now 48 days clean and have the same lack of energy as i had in week 1 2,3 and so on. I am so tired every day , i though i would be better by now, but my god am i exhausted everyday, even when i get 10 hours of sleep.
I cant take this fatigue anymore. can anybody relate!?
Hi everyone. It is day 31 for me and I definitely have had a few connected days of feeling better. As I said before, the depression started lifting on day 26 for me. That same hoplessly sad feeling has not returned like it was before. Sometimes just a low level of malaise starting in the afternoon. Legs still feel weird off and on at night. Just not every night. What I want to say is that the level of awfulness (sadness, no energy, headache) was extreme on day 23 so very surprising when there seemed to be a turn on the 26th day. I started on 150mg daily of wellbutrin the day I jumped off. I have been consistent with the multi vitamin, C, and Bcomplex. I have taken 3000 units of D3 a day along with 1200 mg of Fish oil. In the evenings I have taken the peter gillham's Calm magnesium supplement, 100 milligrams of 5htp and calcium chews. Whew! A couple of days I did nothing...hardly drank water, but tried to get regular with this routine. I am feeling better, I'm not sure if this regime has contributed but I thought I would share it in case it could help someone. I did consider the issue of combining the 5htp with the wellbutrin, but determined that since they weren't large doses, it would be ok for me. I also have been taking pro-biotics daily to assist with stomach issues. They have definitely helped. I have continued to force the walks and excercise when I could do it. It has been just an issue of enduring and I have prayed endlessly and felt strengthened by God to get through.. I do feel (and hope) the worst is over. I know there is a possibility that waves of withdrawal will return. They have, and because of these posts I was prepared for it and it did'nt sideline my intent to get through it. Thanks for being there. It made all the difference in the way I am fighting my fight. Just thought this info could help.
Hi Everyone...I've been reading your posts..and I just want to tell you all how much I admire your strength and courage to keep up the battle with Tram...I also want to tell you once again...IT DOES GET BETTER...No matter how tired, how depressed, how sick you feel...please trust me when i say it will get better...I do not subscribe to the idea that Tramadol scars us for life...My psychiatrist told me that the brain chemistry often takes a while to get back on track..but our bodies are brains are so much more resiliant than we realize...we have the ability to heal...one day at a time...we absolutely do!!
Patience is a tough virtue to muster up..how do i know this??? i want it now!! Once i made decision to go off Tramadol..I felt like i should get some kind of big cosmic reward and start feeling good right away..just by virtue of fact that I made that decision...Wow....was my thinking screwed up or what??!! Anyways..I have to say ..Im 127 days out..i'm bacvk in to the music that i love..i shut down the music..reading..anything that used to give me pleasure..i left behind once I was in the Tram zone..I also was raised in a very negative household..and my tendency is to be negative..I have employed tools to help with that... i try to start day with a gratitude list..i know it sounds simple maybe silly to some.but it works for me by getting me outside myself and for me that is the key...to know that it's not all about Pat....when I realize what I do have..and write it down..something powerful about that for me..I also do affirmations...again probably sounds silly to most..but the spoken word is so powerful to our psyche's...when we say we feel like crap...and we keep saying it..we are probably going to continue to feel like crap.. I realize there's a lot of physical stuff going on for a lot of you..I get that I was there...and last thing i wanted to do was say..."I enjoy good health"... but eventually i was able to do this..I would recommend Louise Hay...she has done incredible work in area of positive affirmations. negativity comes from fear base.I think primarily ..fear of the unknown....if we ask our higher power..whoever that might be..it can be the tree in the backyard you love so much or God..or Buddha..whatever..but ask them to remove the fear. and to help you get thru whatever you are experiencing that moment in withdrawal....I say the serenity prayer over and over and over...when i get into fear..it helps distract me...and really does calm me.. There are tools dear ones..there really are..I also have started going out socially again...never did when i was in the Tram zone..I've found amazing people in 12 step rooms..i've heard incredible stories that make me realize (as I do out here) that I am SO not alone in this journey...I engage easier with people now.. I can cry..i can laugh...naturally...not a forced laugh because you told me a funny joke..in the zone..nothing is funny...nothing is interesting.other than when can i take my next pill. Day by day, hour by hour...you can move through this...it it temporary..all these feelings you are having..all these withdrawal symptoms...keep saying...it's only temporary...it will be gone soon...This is the truth...
Stay strong everyone...do the best you can just for today..this day ..this hour..and if you slip...dont dont do the shame game on yourself...just get back on the bike..and keep going...we are all going to be here..cheering you on..crying with you..laughing with you..reinforcing to you that you will get through all this..
Sending out love and prayers for continued strength and courage... if you can just tell youself..for today..I will not take a tram..that is good enough..Tomorrow is another story..but for today ..you can do it!!!
Day 3 here! about 65 hours to be exact! You are all doing so well. CONGRATS!!! Oh please oh please do not every touch this evil monster again. Funny thing is I have NOOOOOOOO desire for it! It has completely left me. I think because i am soooo pissed at it! and the grip it had on me. Even at my small dosage! I swear I am not really sure if dosage even matters. I see people experiencing terrible w/d even at 2 a day for a year. This is one powerful lil monster.
yesterday was pretty bad! muscles spasms all day almost felt like my body was consistently tense! And the anxiety and weepiness ughh! I coudl NOT get comfortable. Anxious thoughts and feelings all day. Anyone notice their dreams have intensified? and the sex drive? WOOHOOO!! Sorry to be so bold! :)
I didnt sleep super well last night but I am feeling a bit better today! sooo far! I am running on about 5-6 hours of interupted sleep. *sigh*
Anyone notice they are almost afraid to say you feel better because you are afraid its not going to last? Seems like it can turn at any moment.
Now keep in mind I am STILL going thru w/d even while taking 2- 3 darvocet a day which my ob says TAKE them so you can function! Plus the pain has made contractions come on strong so he said stay on them as needed but still the guilt and trading one med for another ughhh!
If you cant control w/d from trams by switching to a "stronger" med then we know tramadol is a huge problem.
I met someone online who is a drug rehab nurse and of all things she is on tram and said that all her patients that come in for tram w/d say its worse then any narcotic w/d they have ever experienced.
This drug should be pulled off the market.
Anyway my appetite is better. I hadn't hardly eaten anything in days and I actually haven't gained anything in 3 weeks which since I am pg is not the best thing. And I already struggle with low weight.
Someone tell me it gets better after day 3 PRETTY PLEASE?!!!
Have I gone through the worst of the hell now?
On a good note dr fitted me for a proper maternity belt and I am calling chiroptractor today to see if that helps. I used to go to him regularly. but insurance changed! :( I am going to have to fork out the money now though I want to be pain free or as close as I can to it anyhow.
For all those that have legitimate pain what do you do for the pain now. I mean it can't be good to sit all day if you can't get off the couch and certainly not healthy right?
You are all such an inspiration and I could NOT have done this without you. I was DETERMINED to beat this crap once and for all.. And while I feel EXTREME guilt right now for having to take the darvocet I feel good knowing I will get this other evil pill out from under me and be done with it. The pill from hell full of lies. I would rather be on anything then this crap. well I think anyhoo. The strongest I have ever been on is vicoden and w/d for me off that was no biggie compared to this.
Can someone tell me wether the 5 htp works or not? I really want to try that and I am going to be calling my naturpath today. (YES all my kids see a naturpath and I highly recommend them) its funny I do everything mostly naturally. Eat organic healthy foods, we even milk our own goats and have our own eggs and used to butcher our own organic pigs lol and we avoid bad things for us, we even use natural toothpaste and soaps but I am on meds. How contradictory ey?
I want to be healthy, I want to be free from all meds and just do only natural things.
Rambling due to no sleep but I just want you to know that I could literally HUG you all and tell you all what wonderful people I think you are!!!! It feels soooo good to be able to get support.
One thing I swear is that "addicts" are the most compassionate and understanding non judgemental people I have ever met.
I want you to know I am praying for you all and wish you the best of luck through this nightmare. We will come out stronger on the other side!
So tell me
after day 3 it gets better? remind me please!!!
Your words REALLY ministered to my heart this morning thank you!!!
You know what is strange is fear is what keeps us in withdrawl longer I think? I am not sure but it seems the more I fear when the next w/d moment will come the more I feel w/d coming on. Its almost like we have to ignore it! and even pretend its not there. HARD TO DO! But fearing it only has intensified it for me. If that makes any sense. Or fear of the unknown. Such as when or is this even going to get better. While going thorugh it you feel like you will ALWAYS forever feel like this.
And seeing you come out the other side really helps.
I must admit seeing people struggle 21-30 days out TERRIFIES me as I am only on day 3 of being tram free and so it seems like forever to feel so crummy.
But.... in the grand sceem of things I should be exctatic I made it 3 days. First time in a VERY VERY VERY long time. And this time I honestly NEVER EVER EVER want to pick it up again.
We need to change our way of thinking. Our negative attitudes.
Lets keep our chins up and realize we WILL feel better eventually!! The light will shine on us again!
I am finally just 3 days out healed completely not even close but seeing little glimpses of light! Where the last 2 days prior (actually longer as I was tapering) I had no smile to my face.
Sometimes I think tapering too slowly only prolongs the agony.
Pat thank you dear one for your words of wisdom and encouragement!
. And if it wasn't for the extreme headache I've had since yesterday, I think things would be a little better. The headache is a little better today, but was really hoping to rid if after a nights sleep as I cannot take anything now for it per my Neurologist. What I wouldn't do for some relief right now. Still very sluggish, and feeling kinda of anxious again, and my legs not real twitchy, buy achy and can't relax completely. Have off today and have so much I could be doing, just have no energy or will so to any of it. Was supposed to go out to dinner with a friend tonight, but unless this headache gets better, think I'll have to cancel, hard to enjoy a good Fish Fry when you have a pounding headache.. I can't find that Hylands stuff for RLS..where can you find this, I've tried Walgreens..thought for sure they would have it?? THanks!
Can any body whos been of Tramadol longer then a month tell me when they regained there full energy. I am now 49 days clean and have the same lack of energy as i had in week 1 2,3 and so on. I am so tired every day , i though i would be better by now, but my god am i exhausted everyday, even when i get 10 hours of sleep.
I cant take this fatigue anymore. can anybody relate!?
Hi to all,
I've read alot of your posts and am convinced that I must be the only person in the world who did not have any ill effects from Tramadol. BUT, I was also taking Percocet. Maybe that is the huge difference. This was a few years ago prior to my bilateral knee replacements. The pain of knee flexion and extension was so bad I could not stand it any longer and went for surgery. I stopped the Tramadol, ct and never had any wd symptoms. Maybe I did and didn't realize them for what they were. After surgery, I stayed with the Percocet until that was insufficient and graduated to Dilaudid, which I am successfully tapering off of at the present. No wd's. I'm convinced I must have an exceptionally strong constitution. I take two Dilaudid, 8mg/day and them Motrin after that if needed. It is really nice not to be in the everpresent depressed fog that I have been in for so long because of the drugs. I had a few fender-benders, constantly forgetting, losing things, not knowing the day or date. Fortunately, I'm retired so it wasn't like I had to hold down a job. But, my work history is terrible. Losing jobs for one reason or the other. The worst was when my husband died. He was a man who insisted on taking care of everything, so when he passed I was lost. But, that was 4 yrs ago and I'm so much better---alert, and oriented. So now, I'm ready to take my life back. I had frequent periods of reclusion when I was recovery from the knee surgery. Just did not want to talk to anyone. But, I'm coming out of the fog, now and my concerned family is very happy. That's all I have to say. My point was that Tramadol never bothered me. Please, do not take this as bragging. Not at all. But, after reading all your stories I am very glad that I don't take it anymore. I welcome any comments.
Good for you Dee. I wish our tramadol experience was as easy as yours. Pat~thanks so much for the advice. It really hit home to me. I will look up the affirmations and give it a try. Hope everyone is well. The energy came back for me in the past when I was off tramadol, but it came back very slowly. It is almost I was unmotivated more than just lacking energy. I started the wellbutrin and that has helped me a lot with the energy and depression, though it may not be right for everyone. It does get so much better after day 3. Day 9 always seemed to be my magic number, but it varies on dosage, length of use, etc. Hope you all have a great holiday weekend.
My relapse is still in effect. I want to quit again, but it is so much more difficult because my fiance and I are having major issues and we are not together right now. I don't know if we can work things out or not. I want to. because I love her so much and we have a one year old daughter. I will give her credit on one thing; she hasn't kept the child away from me. I see her a lot, actually. She works 3rd shift as a CNA so I have the kid every night and most of the day.
I don't know it feels like my fiance just doesn't like the whole home life thing anymore.
If I can just find a good paying job I will be ok.
It's hard to stop when you have so many issues going on and the serotonin-drenched reality is...well... better than facing those problems head on. i thought i was stronger than this
howcouldiknow ~ You ARE stronger than this!!! It's the tramadol that is telling you that you aren't. Don't listen! You CAN kick it to the curb for good. Find your motivation and let that be what keeps you going.
blessedmommy ~ Kudos to you!! I knew you could do it! I see you've found your anger and hatred towards tram. That was the most important thing for me. I used to fear tramadol and any w/d that it would cause. I turned my fear into anger instead and that made all the difference for me. Even at over 5 months out, I still carry my anger for it and that keeps me motivated to stay off them. I won't allow it to take anymore of my precious time away from me!
For those that are struggling with energy... I wish we could tell you that there's a magic number of days that it takes to regain energy, but sadly, there isn't.....period. You aren't just gonna wake up one day and feel normal. It will come with time, though. We are all different....different in the fact that we may/may not have taken other drugs w/ the tram.....different life situations.....etc. Sure, I still have my cruddy days, but very recently (within the past month) I feel like I've made a big leap in my energy. I still think I have a way to go before I feel like my pre-tram self again. The way I look at it is this.... I was on tramadol for over 7 years. It's gonna take more than a few months for my body to re-adjust and right itsself. What's a few months or even a year if it means that I am drug free and no longer dependent on a pill that does NOTHING for me?? Totally worth it in my opinion!
Everyone... Find your motivation and let that keep you focused on the big goal.
Dee, welcome! I do suspect that the Percocet (and then Dilaudid) probably helped stave off the opiate WDs from tramadol. There are two different, but tightly intterrelated aspects of WD from tram, the opiate side, and the SSNRI side. For many of us (myself included), the discontinuation from the antidepressant aspect of tramadol was by FAR the more difficult of the two. Not to say it's not hard to discontinue opiates. Goodness knows it is. But when you read about discontinuing tramadol (also Effexor, and a few very similar compounds) you'll encounter words like "intolerable", "severe mental anguish" and the like. You'll also inevitably find stories of people whose doctors stopped them CT without any help or support, with horrible results. Suicides, I've read of several. And if it weren't for this site and the willingness of those who've gone ahead to share their stories, I can't know that I wouldn't have entertained such thoughts. Suddenly discontinuing a powerful AD like tramadol can cause the mind to cave in on itself. I am so, so glad you didn't experience that.
Again, I suspect that, without the other opiates, you might have had a different experience, but who's to say? The main thing is, you got off it!! That's worth celebrating any way you look at it.
Ok so today is 96 hours so 4 days off tram and I have to admit I have had moments of feeling great and then moments of extreme anxiety and muscle tightening that I can't explain.
I am taking very small doses of narcotic and its not even cutting the withdrawl. I STILL have the withdrawl of trams while on darvocet. WHAT???? ughhh!
I have had some moments where I feel great (well sort of) and then all of a sudden I feel really down and then all of a sudden I feel SUPER anxious and just have irrational anxious thoughts. So its REALLY unpredictable how I feel from one minute to the next.
I would MUCH rather w/d from a narcotic thank you very much!!! Anyway I was on such a low dose of tram before I quite cold turkey but it REALLY had a grip on me. So those that say take another narcotic to get off trams. I am not so sure its helping me at ALL!!!! except for my pain. Which I have legitamate pain.
Is there ANY WAY to stop the stupid muscle things/anxiousness. That is my main symptoms now. I take benadryl at night for sleep and that helps for a couple hours so at least I am getting some sleep and I am not having much RLS. But every few hours my muscles tense and its almost like they are locked in a tense mode and at the same time I am anxious. I think because its causing contractions in my uterus every 6 minutes and I am not ready yet. So I am really anxious about going early. My doctor said he is not going to stop it if I do anyway but still.
SOOOOO someone what do do besides epsom baths? and what to do for anxiety? How do I level my stupid moods? Its WAYYY down one minute and then slighlty up the next. I almost feel bipolar. UGHHH.
the cool thing is is that I feel soooo much freer. I am FREE (well almost) from this awful junk! I hoep this doesn't last long though. I can't stand the anxious/muscle tensing that doesn't let up its soooo weird.
I PRAY that being on narcotics in very small amounts for a week or two won't cause a repeat of withdrawls. Does anyone know? My doctor doesn't think it will be an issue but hwo does he know?
So I am looking for tips to deal with this anxiousness. Did you all notice it comes and goes? at least it doesn't last all day like it was. And muscles OMG I feel like my muscles are going to be soooo strengthened when this is all over LOL.
Love and hugs, and congrats to those that have beat this crap!!!
can I ask how you feel? anxiousness? is that gone? muscle twitching? depression? do you have any remanants? remind me what you were on again and how you jumped off? taper? c/t?
I would love to hear that at 10 days I can feel better. today is only 4 for me and I see little glimpses of hope but I just pray I won't feel like thsi for another month. :(
Blessedmommy, I don't know the pharmacology of Clonidine, but I do know it's a BP medication that has been helpful in reducing many of the WD symptoms for a lot of people. Also, a mild muscle relaxant might be beneficial? I'm not sure, again, how those would work with pregnancy. But it's worth exploring.
I had the muscle tightness and tension. It was painful. Yoga helped tremendously. It helped with MANY things, physical and emotional. The breathing exercises and beginners poses (ones safe for pg) might be worth exploring, too. And basic stretches as often as you can.
Day 7 here..my first week Trams Free! Cannot believe I have made it 7 days without any meds!!?? Kinda surreal in a way! I had an epiphony-like moment last night...I felt great..headache finally went away..felt pretty good. Today is pretty good too, woke up without a headache in a really, really, really long time. Worked today-extremely busy day, came home and no meds taken(unlike in the past when I had a bad day). Walked the dog, did a few chores, feel pretty good. Much better today..looking forward to what the days ahead may bring....
Afternoon all, hope everyone one is having a good holiday weekend :o) I am now @ Day 26 Tram free and doing pretty good. Energy is getting better but still on the low side and have a craving or two here or there but I am holding my own and looking forward a few days to my 30 day clean day. Think I may have to celebrate that one a little lol. Still continuing with my supplements (5htp, B12, St John Wort etc) as they seem to help so I figure if it isn't broke why fix it.
Blessedmommy: For me the anxiety started easing up around day 7 and significantly so about day 10-14. Granted I was/am taking 5htp and St. Johns Wort so I don't know if that was because of the suppliments or that amount of time that had passed. Just keep in mind the anxiety is going to lessen and its going to get better, it really will. But in the mean time you more or less are going to have to roll with it hun, for me the more I fought the anxiety and tenseness (if thats even a word lol) the worse they were. I know that sounds easier said than done when you in the middle of it.
gunitbot: You are further out than I am off of Tram but I was taking it a little over 5 years @ an average of 300mg a day. My energy is about 50% of what it was pre-Tram. I just figure since I was on them as long as I was and at the dosage I was it would take me a while to get back to "normal". I am hoping to be somewhere around that normal @ 6 months clean. I just think for me 5 yrs of use is going to take some time to get it all out of my system. I don't know what or if you have tried any of the suppliments that are reccomended but they seem to help me.
Well, all I am off to do a little shopping and hopefully a little house cleaning. Take care all and be good to yourselves. Hope everyone has a healthy and peacefull weekend! Blessings, Lisa
Have you considered taking L-tyrosone and 5 htp?
Or perhaps starting some wellbutrin?
I am sorry you are going t hru this I can soooo relate!!!
Leann and Lisa:
Thank you both for the encouragement!! I was so excited yesterday because I saw little glimpses of actually feeling decent yesterday afternoon! However evening crrept up on me but still to know I can feel decent again is great!!
day 5 here and some anxiousness now but the little glimpses of hope i felt yesterday really encouraged me alot!!!
keep up the good work really day 1-3 was I think the hardest now its hit and miss how i feel from one minute to the next kwim?
I almost feel bipolar at times lol.
sooooooo wish i could take the 5htp I am going to ask OB on tuesday!
Keep it up folks its sooooooooooooo worth it!!! especially when you see little signs of health again!!
Goooo away tramadol you are not a friend!!
You seek, steal, destroy, make us crave you so we are anxious over counting out pills, wondering when we can take our next dose, wondering if we will run out before our refill, giving us w/d symptoms EVEN while on you to make us want more!
We are tired of going out in a snow storm just to pick up our script because we realized we ran out or running home after we have driven to town almost 15 miles still not at your destination realizing that we forgot out next dose at home.
We are tired of trying a taper and failing, or going cold turkey only to be lured in by your promises of energy, no pain of which only lasts for a short time only to be followed by low energy unless we increase our dose.
We are tired of the obsession with you. the lies you tell, the anxiousness we feel when we can't have you.
We want to be free from your evil lies and sweet nothings whispered in our ear and we no longer have room for your grip in our lives.
Sorry you are going to have to find new friends. The friends here have NOOOO room for you any longer
The Tramadol warriors
Who long to be free from your grip! And will never allow you to rule over us again! You are not worth the energy, time, health, or money spent.
I am now on day 18 off tramadol. Today was a really good day! I am so thrilled to see ME coming back, even a few times today when I felt like I had some energy back. I so know that the recovery from tramadol addiction is up and down- two steps forward and one step back, but I do see improvements every day and I am so eternally grateful for all of you and your encouragement. I have come this far and want to encourage everyone who is beginning a taper or in the first few days of withdrawal to just hang in there. It DOES get better! You will improve. The first 5-7 days a hard, but after thatnevy day is some better. Due to my OCD tendencies, I have journaled and put data on my tracker sonyounall can see how it was for me. I don't believe everyone has the same course, but many have said similar things as I am saying here.
You can get off this horrible pill. I was on it for 10 yrs. It really think after trying to get off in May and then relapsing, I have realized the scary hold it has over me and that I can never take even a tiny amount or I will be back in the same mess. That's what happened in May. After being off for I think about 2 wks or so, I thought one day, feeling very tired and sad, that just a small amt would not hurt and I would only do it once. Well, you know where that one went.... We all must know that we cannot ever take one again and we must do things to help ourselves- take supplements and vitamins and exercise, get on an AD if needed for a while, to get us to the other side of this and to get control of it. I believe I will always be susceptible to this addiction, and so I must never allow it to rule me again.
Please fight hard all you who are in the midst of WD. It will come to an end. Be strong!! It is so worth it when you see yourself returning. I am far from my old self, but I am also far from the mess I was 18 days ago.
May all of you find hope and believe in the truth that you can be free! You can!! You will!! Fight on!!
Hey guess what tramadol, I have done more than fine without you for the last two plus years, next time I want a friend like you, I will just get a stick & poke myself in the eye & be done with it. Great post Blessed.
Joking aside, Gunitbot, have you tried any of the suggestions for energy such as l-tyrosine, adrenal support formula, yerba mate,& exercised. It is hard when you feel as though the energy has gone for good but please know that you will recover & better still you will be free of the random craziness that comes with having tram as a bbf.
Go Beth, wow ten years, what a great achievement.
Georgeous Leann, happy anniversary, I hope you had a big celebration.
Lisa & Sweet, so glad you are both doing well. Lisa, it's good that the 5htp & St John's Wort are helping. What dose are you taking of each? I still prefer to take St John's Wort to any antidepressant. If only it was covered by Medicare but they would still prefer us to take Zoloft.
~~ Bethwillprevail: Thanks for the stories about seeing "you" coming back. Those are always the stories that inspire me - when you get that glimpse of how you used to be pre-tram. Or when someone comments on how you are more engaged or doesn't quite know what is different. I've noticed small things - having a voice in a conversation or getting my sense of humor back. I became such a DUD on trams - I just stayed in the backdrop and let things pass. What a difference!
On the down side however...having a really bad night. Went down from 1/2 3X a day to 1/2, 1/2, 1/4 and got slammed tonight. Very restless, legs are not cooperating! Had to get up and eat (which I have been doing more on occasion). Man, going from 20-30 (50mgs)/day down to where I am was NOT as tough as these 1/2 pill, 1/4 pill drops here at the end. It's 3:02 and I just made a pot of coffee. Ya can't beat em, join em! I'll have 2-3 good nights and then a bad one like tonight.
Overall, during my taper I've had more energy than not. I did see a doc before I started and had a full blood scan & test. Was very low on Vitamin D, and somewhat low on DHEA and testosterone. The Vitamin D, Multivitamin, & DHEA has given me a decent energy boost. Testosterone is on hold b/c wife is pregnant right now & they prefer not taking the gel b/c it could get on wife, into blood stream, and affect baby. Very interested in seeing how testosterone helps my energy level after (hopefully ) quitting for good soon.
Well, I'll let you know how the rest of my taper goes. I am going to stay on 1/2 1/2 1/4 (50mg) for a few days and then take another step down.
~~BlessedMommy - did you take the leap? Last I recall you were on like 1/4, 1/4. Proud of you : ) Like you say in your posts - you can do it!! : )
Happy Labor Day all....
Hope everyone has enjoyed a progressive and better weekend.
Day 29 for me....all going good, it's funny in beginning you read posts of people that are further along (having your bad days) and think when am I gonna get there.......and really it does get better day by day. I still have my moments of fog and no energy, but I have made my mind say GO FOWARD it will pass. I try and keep myself busy and going and I have found most important to stay focused and keep a positve mind. It really does help and of course my two doses of vitamin B complex.
I have no real cravings I am grateful for that, I just don't need that fight. I know I was just ready to be done with this evil addiction. I have many things to heal in the next few months other than my body and mind.
Stay strong everyone.... really really really each day comes with some new moment of THIS CAN BE DONE.... even if its just a moment it is worth it..... Maybe in a year from now when I walk through my garden i will be able to remember what and when i actually planted in my tramadol haze.....
Hope for all.... strength for all....
Gunitbot- see there is hope you are gaining strength. but seriously look into those supplements recommended.
Tdpill: You have done an AMAZING job!!! You should be so proud! Honestly it may be easier on you to take the leap soon. I was suffering soooo much once I got down past about 2 1/2 or so. And the more I cut back finally when I hit 1 1/2 I was in living hell anyway. DEPRESSED horribly and just prolonged agony so I jumped. I won't lie the first 4 days were ummmmm. Well you know! My main symptom was severe anxiety adn muscle tensing. The first 2 days I had stomach junk and feverish feeling but I had hot/cold chills while tapering. So now I am day 6!!! can you believe it. and I feel MUCH MUCH MUCH better.
Now I won't lie to you I am feeling a little bipolar at times! lol. Severe mood swings and still have moments of anxiousness with muscle tensing. I had NOOOOOO idea what a grip this demon had on me.
I am sooooo happy to say I am on day 6! Now is it a picnic? NO I still have periods of intense anxiety and muscle tensing. I can't even really describe it. But I know it will get better. I actually am having periods of being able to THINK now. Where before I was just not able to do ANYTHING! Even during my taper I couldn't concentrate at all. I was a bump on a log.
Yesterday I actually got some things accomplished and it felt so great!!!!
MamaK so glad to here you are doing well.
Madtram, Ladylisa, Myfreedom, Pat, Beth, LeeAnn well all you guys are so encouraging. Couldn't have beat this without you.
Anyone notice that they are almost afraid to say they feel better? Its bizarre I just feel scared to say, I feel actually pretty good! Cuz as you know it can turn but THANK GOD I am now having moments of feeling better. What a relief!!!!
Madtram, thank you so much! It was a quiet day of reflection, but yes, I am still celebrating my first full year without tramadol, sort of in disbelief. It doesn't seem like that long ago that I was here reading Emily's words, Fred's words, and your words, realizing the seriousness of what I was facing. Praying for courage and strength. In some ways, it seems like I am a different person now. Wiser, I suppose. And stronger, for sure.
To everyone worrying about the low energy, I would like to recommend that you see a doctor you trust and request a thyroid panel. I don't know of any definitive connection between tramadol and thyroid problems, but it seems a lot of us develop thyroid issues while taking it. If you have insurance and/or can afford it, request a Free T3 and T4 test, not just the TSH test (which is the standard thyroid test but isn't sufficient to determine thyroid function in and of itself).
Blessings to all of you fighting this battle. You CAN win!! It's the hardest thing many of us will ever do, but you can do it. Just stay the course.
Blessedmommy- We are all soooo proud of you!! You are doing great! I can't wait to hear about your birth story! It won't be long now and just think of what a great thing you have done for that sweet baby. :)
Forget me not- WOW! One year free! What a wonderful celebration for you! You have been an inspiration for me and so many others who are struggling to get thru WD from this evil drug. I plan to eat a big piece of chocolate cake- hope you had something yummy...
Mamakdp- I agree with you completely. At day 19, I just want to quit mynconstant monitoring of my anxiety and fatigue meters. ;). It is so dumb!! I figure I when I stop doing this constantly, I will know I am back to being ME! I had some anxiety today again, but not horrible. For several hours I felt that weird feeling, but it passed and I just pushed thru it. I think it is key to just keep on going no matter how you feel.
Gunitbolt- hang in there. I truly have improved every day, even though on somemdays I have more anxiety or fatigue. Maybe try the 5-htp. I used it a few times and I believe it really did help.
Tdpill- everyone had to determine their path, but I think you should just be done and get it over with so you can feel all better sooner. You are at a low dose. Get horrible stuff out of your system and out of your life for good.
Hope everyone had a great day today. May God strengthen your efforts to be free and live the life you were meant to live- not this false lie that the trams are producing. We can all be free and be ourselves again. I see my old self coming back and i am so so so grateful and thankful. :D
Hope everyone had a good Labor Day weekend or weekend (wherever everyone is)!
I just realized I skipped a day(didn't post yesterday) and I'm on Day 9..almost day 10! Holy Moly..cannot believe it.
Was very anxious for today as my husband and I hosted a little cook-out here for the family. Now in the past I would've taken 2 trams ASAP in the AM, took 2 more trams prior to my guests arrival, maybe another 2 during and maybe even 2 more when they left! As sometimes the "family, the cooking, the cleaning, then "when the heck is everyone gonna leave so I can clean all this crap up and sit down some time tonight" feelings! BUT...I made it, I made it on well did take 2 tylenol for sorry guys..cramps.(which my MD said not to take anything because of that stupid rebound effect.., but um..have to take something for those..was out of ibuprofen). Had a mild headache off and on today, but overall, had enough energy to push through, clean prior, to cook and clean up after and even walk the dog after they left!! With no Trams or other rx's.
Have noticed a difference...energy slowing creeping back, losing the fog..AM's still hard. I do find when I sleep in, its worse, get a heachache, kinda more in a fog. Legs still ache or are restless. Still doing the Epsom baths, plan on going to GNC tomorrow to get some other vitamins.
Not gonna lie though...still get the cravings, worked all weekend and it would be like clock-work to punch out, get in the car, take some trams..get home all wired up to get crap done, make phone calls, etc. I really, really have to push myself to do things now.
And one of my fellow co-workers said I needed some "downers" as I quickly reacted to something that was said yesterday. THis is one thing I am truley afraid of..the trams..maybe the SSRI properties or something helped me DEAL or CALM down, I have a small fuse and find myself over-reacting quickly to certain things or situations. Even a certain part of my job, which is high stress-leveled..I would easlily justify myself taking trams in the past because of the stress and headache I would recieve because of it. How to deal with these feelings now..I'm not sure.....I hope to find the answers one way or another!
Beth wrote: "I think it is key to just keep on going no matter how you feel. "
YES. This is SO true. A good friend of mine said to me once when I was hysterical over how horrible I felt, "Just observe it." Wow. That's not easy to do, especially when we've sort of grown used to thinking we are what we feel. When I learned to do this, though, I really discovered the key to getting through it. You are NOT what you feel. Feelings are just that: feelings. Indicators that something is going on in your body (you already know what that is!!). And the thing about feelings is, they CHANGE pretty quickly. So whatever you are feeling in your journey to recovery, try to separate your Self from it and just observe it. Acknowledge it, recognize it, and tell yourself you are NOT what you feel. You are a person who is going through intense healing, and the sensations, both physical and emotional, will pass in time.
James, I hope you are strong and enjoying a good day! Fight on, warriors. You can beat this.
Hope everyone had and enjoyable and healing Labor Day weekend (for those of us in the states). I am chugging right along here at 29 days Tram free. Had a rough time the night before last will my old enemy RLS. Has been very mild the past 10 days or so but the other night it decided to make a major comeback. Had my Hylands and took it but still fought for about 3-4 hours tossing and turning and twitching then took another dose and finally got some restful sleep starting at around 6am. Thank goodness for the weekend and a couple of pair of extra hands around the house. Last night I took Hylands about half hour before bed to be safe and not a twitch and slept fairly good. It looks like everyone on here has been making some terrific strides towards good health and freedom from Tram.
gunitbolt: I am so glad you are seeing some improvement in your energy. Every little bit helps so much!
sweetstang: You are doing incredible!!! You are going to see even more improvement little by little each day. Thats not to say you wont have the occassional bad day or evening (had one myself just the other night lol). But the good ones are going to start out number the bad here very soon!
blessed: I am so proud of you lady!! You have been really fighting so hard no only for yourself but for your little one to be. I totally get what you mean by being afraid to say you are feeling somewhat better lol. I was like that too the first 10 days or so. I was afraid if I said it out loud I might jinx myself ;o) Those periods are clearer thinking and being about to see through the fog are going to start to come more and more often now. Before you know it you will be standing in the sun again and it will feel wonderful. Take care of yourself hun and keep us posted on how your little one is doing also.
As for me, aside from the general energy slump and a little sleep disturbance I am feeling pretty fine. My family is completely thrilled with the changes they are seeing in me and I am pretty happy with those changes myself. If nothing else their unconditional love and support through the past month alone is my inspiration to never touch another Tramadol again. Stay strong and know you are not alone in your battle. Take care all and God bless, Lisa
I thought I would join in your conversation here. I'm on my first day without the evil trams after a week long taper. I'm doing ok physically but mentally I'm struggling. I'm not having cravings, just depressed and picking everything about my life apart in my head. I KNOW that it's just the drugs, and not reality so I'm trying really really hard to accept that and pick myself up. I am so done with this drug...the last thing I want to do is take one more. I'm going to push through the pain and the tears because enduring them makes me realize what a horrible thing these pills are...I'm just trying to convince myself about the light at the end of the tunnel :)
I am so moved by everyone in this forum's genuine support for each other in our collective roads to recovery. I hope to soon be where many of you are right now on that road.
Congratulations to all of you who have stuck it out and made it through to a better day! You are my inspiration!
Stupidpill (love the name)- you have a few bad days ahead- plan on them, and take care of yourself during that time. you are only 4-5 days away from feeling better. The first few days are very hard, but hunker down- take warm baths, use other remedies you have read on this page. You said it- push thru it. You can do it!! I was on them for 10 yrs and I have been off now for 19 days. Feeling soooooooo much better. You will too. The sadness is mostly gone now, but I still have periods of anxiety and fatigue. you will probably have ups and downs with frequent mood swings as your brain recalibrates the production of serotonin and other chemicals that are messed up by the trams. For me, I figure after 10 yrs, it will be awhile before I am totally back to ME, but I can see more of ME everyday, and I am so happy!!!
Lisa- how awesome- 29 days! I am sure looking forward to that 30 day mark!! Fantastic!
Sweetstang- you are doing great. Day 9 is past the worst of it. I also have a high stress job. But you know, I think the lies of the trams are there to tell you you can't donit without them. I believe we must learn new ways to deal with things. At day 19, I am finding I actually was good at my job before the trams. I can do it very well without them. Wiat till you are at day 30! I bet you find you are doing much bette without them. I can concentrate so much better.
Blessed- I am just proud to be a comrade coming off this stuff with you! You are doing sooooo well! I can't wait to hear about that baby. Too soon, but we are all waiting for the day of that post!
Hope everyone had a good weekend. Keep fighting warriors! Don't give in or give up!!!!
For all of u that have been with me , read me , listened to me , suggested to me....I couldn't have done it with out you all.
For all of u that are joining me ..... stay strong IT WILL GET BETTER and I have a long road ahead of me behind me a long path of abuse I leave behind....
You have all been an support system right from day one.... and even reading back to 08 and the brave brave emily...you are amazing,
Keep fighting..... I will stay here and keep strong with you all....
Mama- 30 days!!! That is a landmark!!! Fantastic!!! It is a hard road, this addiction path we took in our past, but now it is behind you, and better roads await you. I am at day 20. Can't wait to make the 30 mark!
It DOES get better, even though that horrible pill tells you that it won't. I think I may make myself a list of all the really crazy things I used to think about related to taking those pills.... Like thinking ..... 'what if there was a national disaster, how would I get my pills?' OR 'what if they decide the mail order pills are no longer legal?' 'what if i get in a car wreck and i am in the hosoital- how will i get my trams' OR 'What if i dont have enough energy to do all I need to do'.....I had a whole list of 'Fears' based around trams. Don't let your fears that are based on tramadol induced lies effect your path to freedom. Then other thoughts I had were.... 'Will I still be on this crap when I am 80?'.... That one really made me think. I am done with the lies the pills have always told me. I am free now. It's great!!
It is so nice to see so much collective support and success on this site. I am so proud of all of you.I am on day 21 or 22? I feel pretty good minus some random insomnia. It is great to see so many of you racking up tram free days. We can do this guys. Have a great day.
Haha- Beth, I had those same fears, especially the one about the pills not being legal anymore by mail since that's sort of a loophole legal anyway. Looking at it from the outside right now it does seem pretty ridiculous. I was always SOOOO scared that my mail order pills wouldn't come and I was always on edge until they arrived and were in my hand. When I decided to quit it was when I ordered last time & they didn't come and I was FREAKING out. I decided to use it as a sign from the universe that it was time.
This is kind of crazy...I'm sitting here at work with a morning radio show on like I always do for background noise if nothing else, but they are talking about how the epidemic of prescription drug abuse by people for recreational purposes along with the over prescribing by doctors that gets people hooked. They are calling it Pharmageddon and are saying that in 15 states and Washington D.C. drug overdoses have surpassed car accidents as the number one cause of accidental death and that a very large portion of that is from prescription drugs. We are the lucky ones here who are getting the help we need before things really get out of hand! Something needs to be done in this country.
Well folks, I made it through day one with no pills. I'm alive. Things feel grey but I'm alive and breathing and I'm fine physically. I thought about staying home from work, but since I'm not physically sick, I decided that at least work would be a distraction and being around other people can only help.
Thanks all for the encouragement everyone.
Stupidpill: HANG IN THERE!! It does get better. The first 3-5 days are rough but after that it does get better I sOOOO promise you that. Please endure these next few days. You will be soooo glad you did. Take lots of baths with epsom salt, take extra magnesium, benadryl for sleep if that doesn't give you more RLS. I took it and it actually helped my anxiety.
eat well and do your best to get sleep. I can honestly say that the less sleep I got the worst I felt. So really aim to get sleep in. Keep your blood sugar even as well. When my blood sugar was low (I have a monitor) I felt much more anxious and down. Lots of almonds, nuts, protien type foods. And bananas for potassium. 5 htp, st johns wart, l-tyrosone are GREAT for mood health. I can't take it but two of my family members are on it and think its awsome. Rescue remedy for anxiety. This really helped me and totally safe. Please let us help you through this process. We are rooting for you and understand!
I am on day EIGHT!!! I never thought I would make it. Day 6 was a downer day for me. MUCH less anxiety but down in the dumps depression. However yesterday was great for teh most part. I find that I have two times a day where the muscle twitching anxiety kicks in but it didn't last all that long. I WAS SOOOO THANKFUL!!!! Didn't sleep the greatest last night but hay can't have everything. :)
I am FREEEEEEEE!!! I NEVER thought I could be free. I thought I would just take this pill until I was old and grey. :)
I ABSOLUTELY HATE and DESPISE tramadol.
What I miss? energy!!!!!! So I am going to get some supplementation after baby is born.
Went to the dr yesterday and I have only gained 15 lbs my whole pregnancy. :( not good when you are already on the thin side. So naturally i start to panic right?! Dr did an ultrasound and baby is on the bigger side not smaller already 6 1/2 lbs and not even done cooking yet. So she is just taking everything from me. :) Now I haven';t gained in two months and honestly I think it was the slow taper I did that just made me so depressed I felt no desire to eat much plus the bad acid reflux I get . I feel so much better after jumping off and finishing the process ct. as hellashish as it was lol.
but he said baby looks awesome and not to worry. 3 more weeks peoples!!! can't wait for all this anxiety about babys health to leave! assuming she is healthy. Dr said meds should not effect outcome whatsoever. I was on such a low dose.
I couldn't have done it without you all, I cannot believe I am on day 8. It felt like it was never goign to get here. it felt like the anxiousness was never going to go away and it is!! IT IS!!!not gone but 90% better I can't rejoice enough! Am I 100% nope!! But I am soooo much better. I see a smile in my face and omgosh I am free. It feels sooooooo good to be free!!!!! This evil little pill is a monster. And I have heard OVER and OVER and OVER again from several others this is worse then getting of any narcotic. I believe it!
Trudge on its sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo worth it!! I feel like crying because I am so relieved to be off. What a heavy monkey lifted off my back.
I am so proud of you all! Keep up the great work! Know this can be done. I never thought it could especially the first 3 days enduring but it CAN!!!! and the benefits you recieve are just so worth it.
has anyone noticed any numbness tingling in lips etc when coming off this?
I remember coming off of paxil about 8 years ago and I experienced the numbness tingling sensation. So I am just curious if this is part of the w/d.
YES I agree. darvocet has done NOTHING for my tram w/d. I would still suffer severe anxiety and muscle twitching while on them. I like the trams for the energy/depression. Opiates don't make me happy they make me more depressed and tired! So not even sure trams have opiate properties in them.
MadTram writes, "Hey guess what tramadol, I have done more than fine without you for the last two plus years, next time I want a friend like you, I will just get a stick & poke myself in the eye & be done with it."
Blessed - congrats on your day 8!!! thanks so much for your support! I can't wait to be where you are. I've actually been doing a lot of what you suggest. I've been taking the mag/cal supplement along w/ Tylenol PM before bed and so far I've only had one night that sucked really band on sleeping. I've had a lot of trouble with night sweats though which is strange. And HORRIBLE nightmares! I have always seen that Rescue Remedy but didn't know if it actually worked...will have to give it a shot! There is a store that sells it next door...gonna go grab some on my way home from work.
Well so far today I have run a strange gambit of emotions. I was on the verge of tears before lunch, and then I made myself go to the gym that's next door to my work and do a little cardio since it's one of the things I have always used to help with my depression (I've had problems w/ depression on and off through my adult life). Felt MUCH better after that. I took my supplements - a vitamin pack w/ a fish oil cap, some extra vitamin C, B12 supplement and Sam-e and now I'm feeling kind of anxious & jittery. Maybe I took too much of the B12 or Sam-e...but I'm not depressed! I would rather have this feeling though than the black depression sadness...My energy level is also better than I expected.
I'm almost through day 2...still alive! Have to go with my boyfriend tonight to see his friend's band play. Hopefully getting out tonight & keeping busy will help....
All I know is that without this forum, I'm not sure where I would be! It's so much of a comfort to know other people have been through this and are going through this now with me! Thank you so much EmilyPost for your thread :) You are an angel.
Glad to see everyone on such a positive note....whewwww ...... push those bad hours away.
Big ad today also in my local Newspaper about sheriffs getting into narcotic prescription website for over abusers and stats for drug OD higher than ever. Local Pain Manag advocate fighting it for privacy reasons, but I for one would love to see the numbers. I do respect those who are in real pain, which is where I started but when I discovered the mail order thing..... my troubles began. Should go back through my bank statements and see the $$$$$$....of course that would depress me. Still get a little twang when I see the fed ex truck.... wonder how many 18.95 charges they made off me.
God what a relief knowing they won't be pulling in my driveway.... My last order I actually sent back and my regular route driver was so dissappointed to know that I wouldn't be getting my "medicine" anymore. Little did she know.....
I see a big crack down coming on that stuff. On another note ...those websites are relentless with the reorders and they called my cell phone 9 times on Monday .... Its kinda rewarding though to say NOPE no more .. take that tiny pill and shove it where the sun don' t shine.... I wonder if they are on such a push because they know the end of there money making scheme is coming? I am grateful to be able to say NO so easily. I don't think I could handle that fight. I guess you really do have to be ready to do it.... so many times I said this is the last order..... this is the last time.
Now it really is.....
It was a long hard 30 day road. And I am sure I have some bad days ahead, but for the most part I am feeling good.
I find my emotions still on the edge, but I see that slowly improving also. Energy level is low but if you just trudge on....somehow you find the will to do what has to be done, MIND OVER MATTER.... easier typed than done but stay strong it really is worth the fight in so many small ways. Okay..... I have overdone....
Strength for you all.... another day another new discovery for all....
Hoping everyone's day was a productive and happy one ;o) I hit my 30 Day Free mark today and would have done a happy dance for myself but alas I am sick. Got a nasty little cold going on and will be glad when it's over. Mamakpd I can so relate to you! I too started my sad relationship with Tramadol with actual pain from RA. I think just about all of us started with a true need for medication. But also for all of us it eventually spiraled out of control. I started the on-line buying also and boy wouldn't it be nice to have that money back now lol. I too see the local fedex driver occassionally and feel a little tug. But it is a better feeling knowing I have all that extra money in the bank now and not in those pill pusher web sites hands. It also feels great not having to worry about being home at the time fedex is going to show up or worrying about whether there will be a problem with my delivery that falls on a Friday because I just KNOW I wont have enough pills to last till Monday. One time I went to order at my "usual" website and their page was down for some reason and I almost freaked out! Life is so much nicer now not having to chase after a stupid pill. I have said before I feel like I can finally breathe again. It was like I was always holding my breath and stressing about having enough pills or making sure I always had at least a few with me. Now its like "whoooooshhhhhhhhhhh" so glad that is over lol. It is great to see that everyone here seems to be holding strong and moving forward. Take care all and have a restful night! Blessings, Lisa
Congrats Lisa & mammaK on Day 30..your an inspiration!!
Beth..Day 20...I am almost there myself!!
BlessidMommy...Day 8..awesome...give you cred esp being pregnant and having to deal with this crap!! Keep it up!!
Stupid Pill-It also helped me to work and distract myself..I found the time went quicker and was much easier than sitting at home thinking about it all day/night long with that drained, anxious feeling like "oh there is so much I could be doing, but just don't feel like doing any of it" Keep at it, gets better everyday!! Very interesting too about the pharmacueticals too!
Day 12 here for me!! Whoo Hoo!! I really wish this headache would subside...they have been much better (outside of 3 bad days) since going off the trams. Had another bad one last night when I was done with work. I went and saw my friend in the hospital as she just had undergone Gastric Bypass surgery. I brought her flowers and a card as she was sitting by herself there, her hubby had to leave to get the kids and her Mom had left too. I had switched my plans around as I thought she wouldn't want visitors that first day and I just on a whim changed my mind, canceled the original plans and went to go see her. Felt amazing to be there for her during that difficult time. She was so happy I came to see her and the flowers helped too!! But I had such a bad headache, didn't eat much for dinner. (But I didn't want to bring food/drink in as she can't eat or drink anything) Did have many thoughts as I wished I had 2 trams to take to relieve the headache. BUT, I didn't, and I just carried on, and I made it!!
I feel much better than the first 10 days, getting energy back, feeling more normal, just need to get rid of these headaches now!!
Sweet~maybe it is something in the air. I have had horrible headaches too lately. I too remember waiting for the fedex man. I had my pills shipped to a ups store so no one would know at work or home. I am so glad to be free from the hell of waiting for fedex, worrying about pills, etc. I feel really happy days. mY energy is great, sex drive is great and I slept a solid 9 hours last night. Free at last!!!!!
YAY you guys are doing AWESOME. Stupidpill: how are you doing? day three?
I am on day 9. I have spurts of energy and then down. But I am fairing well. Just still trying to get rid of that muscle weirdness in the evenings. SOOO strange!
I get it twice a day but each day its lasting less and less. woohoo.
I am rather cranky today as I am having quite a bit of pain. :( but.... feels soooooooo good to be free!
My anxiety is no where near what it used to be. Looking back the first 3-4 days was definately the hardest. I never kept a journal I should have. No more hot/cold chills except on very small occasion for short periods of time.
I feel sooooooooo much better. TRAM FREE!!! WOOHOO Never thought I could say that.
I am sorry about your headaches sweet and booba. I am getting them only occasionally. but I take tylonal and it helps.
Still using my hot rice packs and tiger balm for my pain. yesterday I couldn't rest at all as I had company and BOYYYY was I feeling it but I trudged through.
But whats cool is I have little spouts of energy coming back. Not 100% but its coming back. And the brain fog comes and goes. But mostly its not even CLOSE to what it was. YAY hoo!!!
FEEL SO GOOD TO BE FREE!!!!
For anyone just starting out you CAN do this. It is soooo worth not being controlled by this little demon pill. I have no desire (excpect for the energy) to be back on it.
Blessedmommy- you are awesome, if you dont mind me saying so! Great job!!
I too have a headache goin on today- but it has not rained here in 3 weeks and it is coming tonight, sooooo...maybe that's what my problem is. There is something so peaceful about rain. Looking forward to it!
How weird to have some WD symptoms again today. I have noticed when I have a bad day, it seems like my body is doing battle inside and when my body wins (ie...no trams ingested), I come out of the bad spell with a new and much better level of feeling better!!
Hope everyone is staying strong and fighting the beast with all your might!! It reallt is so good to be free!!
I just found this forum and I'm so grateful. I've been on The Evil Pill since last July for a problem with stomach cramps after the placement of an IUD. After I ran out of refills, I googled Tramadol to see if withdrawal symptoms were common. BIG MISTAKE. I found out you can order them online without a prescription. If I had only know what one click of the button would do...It's now a year and a few months later and I find myself taking 15-20 a day. I have known I needed to stop, but haven't had the guts to try. I have experienced brutal withdrawal symptoms when I have run out of pills. I find myself lying to friends and family all the time. Absolutely no one around me knows I have a problem, and I'm afraid of what will happen if I tell my husband. I was supposed to be on a business trip for work this weekend, and I realized I was out of trams and I panicked. I faked sick so that I can do the withdrawal at home. I had 10 left as of this morning and no way to get more until Monday, so slow tapering isn't really an option for me. I tried to go cold turkey, but I feel so sad and down that I broke down an took 3 pills a few hours ago. I feel like the best thing I can do is to not order anymore and just tough it out. I don't seem to have bad physical symptoms (some chills and anxiety) but I have this sad feeling that feels like it is overwhelming me.
Glad you found us Southerngirl but so sorry that you need to be here. First off everyone here is wonderful and extremely supportive and helpful. When I was in the first days of WDs reading back through all the old posts helped so much for not only information but also or inspiration. Every single person here has walk where you are walking now and understand exactly where you are at hun. Tramadol really is a Evil Pill!! I am not going to kid you the withdrawals from the nasty drug are rough but quite do-able if you plan ahead. I have to tell you though probably one of the best things you can do for yourself right now is to confide in someone, hopefully your husband. You would be amazed how supportive those that truly love us can be. I had to do a fast taper myself and then jump cold turkey because like you I was running out. The first 5 days totally off are the worst as far as the physical stuff. And I don't know if you were aware of it but sad feelings you were having after stopping were probably the WD from the antidepressent that is found in Tramadol. Thats it's dirty little secret, it is not only a synthetic opiate it contains an older class of antidepressent that most people (including myself) were/ are not even aware of. There is something called Thomas Recipe that I am sure someone on here can link for you that many trying to get off pain meds swear by. What worked for me the most during acute WDs was immodium, Hylands Restful Legs, B12, 5htp, St John's Wort, good woman's Multi-Vitamin, tons of water, bland food when I could stomach it such as toast w/ peanut butter, bananas, crackers and cheese, soup etc. If there is anything I am missing I am sure the others here will chime in on your post too. Hang in there and like I said read back through this journal because it is a wealth of information and post and update as often as you can or like. Take care of yourself and let us know how you are doing. Blessings, Lisa
Hello Friends...haven't posted for a while. I read and check in with you everyday. I am 37 days out and yesterday was just a bear for me. Deep depression, restless legs, absolutely no energy. The wd symptoms and mental anguish returned with a vengeance! What is the deal?...it's like a horror movie and you think the monster is dead and as you are leaning over it glad it is dead, it comes for you again! ha. What an image....I actually thought about taking a tramadol for the first time yesterday. I thought I just could not take the depression anymore, but I did'nt, I know I won't. Will someone please remind me about how long the symptoms continue to reappear? I was only taking 2 50mg for one year. I was actually starting to feel really bad on it and was getting sick frequently. I think there is an immune suppression aspect of tramadol. Bad stuff.
I can't express how much this support has helped me. I would not have known how brutal this drug was or would have never identified and jumped off. The suggestions of supplements and other things have helped me stay on track with the long haul. Thank you so much everyone. I think of you lovingly and prayerfully. I have had lots of better days but the intensity of yesterday, (and today) had been unsettling.
I have not told anyone even my husband of this struggle. I don't want to give any ammunition to my mate of thinking I am crazy. I feel I have held it together fairly well. I have two children still at home, one little. The business of life had been helpful and kids won't wait. They are active inspiration for recovery. I am sick of these withdrawals!!!! It makes me so mad. I will be having a conversation with my beloved Dr. who assured me there would be no problems. I had a piece of paper in my purse for a year with the word "tramadol" written on it before I made the call and told him I would try it. A serious neck problem with chronic pain caused him to suggest it. I did tons of reading, saw the danger and asked him about it. He assured me no problem.. I absolutely thought it was a miracle drug. Told him so. It was fabulous for almost a year and turned on me suddenly. I thought the pain relief was the reason for the new sense of wellbeing. I started to be in withdrawal between doses. I had no idea...
Oh well...enought rambling to my new friends. Thanks for being here. Keep posting..it has been a lifeline. much love
In this fight of mine the only supplement I have added was a B- Complex. Now ... last night I had a rough night with RLS... stretchy legs skin crawly hair sticking to my neck .... and when I went to take my bedtime meds I realized that the night before I forgot to take them ..... so what ever supplement you have found that works I guess for me its the b-complex. So they really do help. I take it morning and night. I really did some research on the HTP this am and the l-tyrosine. I will head to GNC today and add some of those things to my regimine. Because if just the complex has helped I am willing to go a step further. I have managed to gain about 9 NINE lbs since the beg of Aug which has added to my "depression" because it just makes me miserable. I still have the bloats.... eating makes me uncompfortable but it also has become my pastime. Next week I will go back to work full time and that should help since I walk for a living.
Some people lost there appitite .... mine.... well lets just say that tramadol days ..... eating was just a have to do thing. Guess I have some reconditioning work to do there. May have to add a overeating forum to my daily visit to posts......guess my intestinal opiate receptors took the worst beating over this as far as long term.
remembering my first days of post craving a double fudge brownie and a crusty italian bread....
I see the sadness depression easing up unless I bring it on myself like this weight issue.... everyday issues are easier to refocus and go foward.
Anyway the want to do is there.... I want to do this .... having some issues with doing.... doing takes more energy some days than others.... hoping adding some more supplements will give me the little extra push..... anybody have any thoughts about acai berry supplements.... ???
Onward my friends.... each day one day at a time.... 33 days is a short period of time for such a BIG accomplishement ....
but I am doing..... and that means WE ALL CAN DO!!!!!
Angelmoon- I am on day 22 and have had the same experience. I researched it and believe this is the PAWS- post acciction withdrawl syndrome- rearing its ugly head. OK...yesterday I felt horrible- all the bad stuff again- just felt like my legs weighed 1000 lbs, no energy, actually had some cravings, foggy, all that. I really felt like my body was doing a battle inside- I guess thats the PAWS- body just has to recalibrate. So today, as predicted, I feel great- like running a race! Thinking clear, energy, motivated- I love it!! This is a pattern for me. The bad periods are coming less and good days more, but I am prepared. I know it will happen that way for me and hang in there for a better day. Bad bad stuff- tramadol. I will never touch one again. Horrible..... But I am sooooo glad to be free, no matter if I have bad days. I am in control of ME now, not the pills running my life.
I have been taking the B-Complex too and I think it helps. I have the 5-htp, but I am a liitle leary of any seritonin adjustments going on. But I have taken it a few times and it did seem to help some.
Hang in there tram warriors!! You can be free!!! You can do it!!!
Southerngirl - you'll get through it! That first week ***** but after that things really start to improve. This forum really is a godsend to those of use going through this crap. We have all been where you are so you are in good company!
I am on day 4 now officially Tram free and 8 days since I started my quick taper and so far so good. The worst days were the first of my taper, the first day that I went to 1 pill and then the first on 0 pills. The depression and anxiety are the main issue still but it's easing up. My worst problem is that my relationship with my boyfriend has been pretty rocky lately and there are a lot of issues between us and I am more anxious than ever about that because of the increased anxiety. I find myself trying to analyze everything all the time and feel some sort of pressure (that's only in my head) to make some sort of decision about our future. I know that I need to slow down and give it some time until some of this anxiety has passed and then look at it again.
Congrats on everyone's clean time! We are doing this together!
Thank you Bethwillprevail! I just did a little research myself on PAWS (had never heard of it) and it looks like it is a good sign that your brain is recovering. It can last as long as 2 years, good grief. It was interesting to read that the symptoms can return with the same intensity but will go longer and longer stretches without.. It is also good to know that it usually comes in for a few days...kind of like a storm. But...storms end, the sun comes out....that is a sure thing. Good to know. Thanks girl
Thanks for the encouragement. I finally talked to my sister-in-law who is a doctor about this whole thing. She recommended a local doctor to see. She called me in a prescription for 10 pills because she was concerned about the rapid taper thing. Apparently it can be dangerous for some people, esp. those with as high a dose as I was taking. She called me back this morning and said she had done a little research and that antidepressants might be the way to go to get off this stuff. I was on Lexapro for a few months a few years ago. It really helped me get back on solid footing emotionally. She suggested I see the doctor she recommended and talk to him about tapering off the tram and onto the Lexapro. I'm thinking that might be a good suggestion since I didn't have trouble tapering off the Lexapro before. She said if I was going to be on something, she would much rather me be taking the Lexapro.
So I'm not completely out in the cold here...Still in some pretty serious withdrawals though. Normally by now, I've had between 6-8 pills and today I've had only 2. Trying my best to tough it out. Physically, the symptoms have been very mild. My big issues have been emotional/psychological. One might things look okay and I really feel like I'm going to make it, the next I'm wondering how in the world I'll ever get off this stuff--just making it through until Monday when I can see a doctor seems like too much. Working and/or reading seems to help distract me, so I'm trying to stay busy. Luckily I have a job where I can work from home. It just hit me yesterday all the lies that I've had to tell because of this stuff. I am very driven and have a job most people would kill for and I'm screwing it all up because of the drug. I've found myself doing things I would never have imagined before I started taking them.
Coming on here is a double-edged sword for me because I'm trying to keep my mind focuses on other things, but at the same time, it helps to read posts from all of you who have been here before.
My strategy has been to take OTC sleep aids and try to sleep through as much of the weekend as possible. Does anyone have an thoughts on that, or on the Lexapro? Thanks.
mamakpd ~ We must be rather close together. My husband said he read about the sheriff wanting the Rx info as well. Also, in my opinion/experience, the weight gain is all part of the w/d. I have had the same problem...and I know of 2 other people close to me that also gained some weight after stopping, too. The entire time I was on tramadol, I was at or slightly below my "ideal" weight. After I started my taper I began to gain some weight. I've been tram free for 5 1/2 months now (170 days) and it seems to have leveled off/stopped at 12 pounds. I'm certain I could do something about it if I would get my behind up and exercise though. While I was on tramadol, my appetite was lower and I couldn't eat as much at a time. I would usually eat several small meals throughout the day rather than 3 big meals a day. I can't do that now. I don't know if it's the nature of the drug that causes the weight to come off/stay off while we are on it or if it is something else altogether. I was very, very bummed about it at first....but finally decided that I will accept it as long as I am drug free. Also, I was the same with the clear "want" to get up and do what I need to do, but just had no energy whatsoever to get up! It was like having two voices going on in my head....one being very clear and motivated and knowing what needs to be done (my drug-free brain).....and the other saying, nah, I don't have the energy or desire to get up and do it (most certainly the remnants of tramadol talking to me). That has probably taken me the longest to make progress with (could be my 7+ years of use). Although all along I was feeling some improvements, it wasn't until I hit about 4 1/2 months that I started seeing a significant difference in my ability to overcome the lack of energy. I take a B12 supp also. It really does seem to work. It seems to work best when I take it daily as opposed to just whenever I felt like it.
I hope you all are doing well and hanging in there!
Gotta get outta here and take my kiddo to his soccer game.
Southerngirl, if you can get some sleep with the aid of OTCs, that's great & sleeping your way through the worst sounds like a plan to me.
If the Lexapro has worked for you in the past, there's a reasonable chance it will help restore your serotonin balance now.
Theoretically if anyone has had an SSRI or SNARI that has suited them previously, it should be some help in withdrawal. You would think that Effexor or Pristiq would work for everyone, being the closest chemical match to the AD in tram but it doesn't always seem to be the case.
For anyone with carb cravings, this is often associated with serotonin imbalance so 5htp will also help with this. As 5htp is one of the ingredients your brain uses to make serotonin, its effects are more subtle than the SSRIs which act directly on the receptors.
For anyone who doesn't tolerate l-tyrosine, (it gives me the jitters), I have rediscovered that yerba mate gives me a nice smooth subtle increase in energy.
So good to hear the expressions of freedom. Don't forget to celebrate all these improvements & hold them close for future recollection when needed.
Officially 2 weeks/14 days here!! Saaweeet says Sweetstang here.
Thanks Beth for explaining the PAWS thing..I've read that a few times now and didn't know what it meant. Makes a lot of sense now.
Another tip my recovered friend told me this past week, what he learned that makes a lot of sense and can be useful to those really struggling out there is H.A.L.T.
Those in addiction recovery learn that taking care of your basic needs will aid in relapse prevention. There is even a catchy acronym for it. H.A.L.T. - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. Paying attention to these simple needs is a great start in recovery.
Makes so much sense now as this past week when I was hungry, and angry. and tired..easy fix would have been some trams.
I could always find a way to justify taking it or more....ALWAYS. So good to know...don't allow yourself to get any of those symptoms.
I am doing ok/better. Still battling the headaches..they come and go..and its frustrating when they come as I can't take anything. My Neuro. said it can take up to 3 months before my body adjusts with the past rebound effect. Sure hope she's right. Also wanted to mention...last night I went out for a Fish Fry and drinks with a friend from work. First time in prolly 2-3 years where I drank without taking meds on top of it. Used to take my pills with whatever the heck I was drinking, didn't matter to me. Was wondering what the effects would be and my friend inital thought was that I would feel it LESS, because the meds usually intensify those feelings..for me it was opposite. I think cause i was so drugged up all the time, the alcholol would just make me tired with a worse headache. Totally felt the alcholol quicker withought any meds in me. Just kinda a new experience for me.
Hang in there for the newbies..you'll get there..the first week was hell, but it DOES improve...energy is better daily, still some hazy, lazy days, but it passes. Sleeping fine too.
No sunshine has zapped me this afternoon. I feel like I am getting adequate amounts of uninterupted sleep, but some days....today and not yesterday wow... I just am drained.
Trying not to dwell, have gotten what needs to be done ...done. Should do a whole bunch more.
A small price to pay I suppose. I am happy with my accomplishment of no more little pill.
This mood makes me look for food though.... I did manange to push some buttons on this computer for weight loss ideas... I just need to get back to moving and staying busy. My brain knows that SOMEONE tell my body.
So much easier said than done. Anyway wishing everyone a strong weekend. Patterns seem to be one day good, one day bad.....Soon they will outweigh. I can tell you for SURE I don't crave tram. I have developed a severe hatred and I hope I can hang on to that. This mood and energy crash does not make me crave a pill, just the strength to hang on for more heal time....of which I am sure I am facing a lot... since my abuse is LONG and completely amount abused. So onward... maybe just an hour nap...?? I am very concerned about my readings into 5HTP and my BP...anyone have any issues with it raising?
Guys I am going downhill. Since my fiance and I aren't together anymore I have been in a mess. My tram relapse is still in effect. I am back up to my usual dosage for when I quit in December. Which is 200mg daily. 100mg in morning and another 100mg in afternoon. I don't know if I could handle going through withdrawal with all the stress and grief that is going on right now. I want my woman back :-( I hope we can work things out in the future. Especially since there is a precious one year old baby in the middle of it all. I am seeing my child everyday, though. I will give my ex credit on that. She doesn't try to keep the baby away from me like most young moms would and I have been seeing her a lot! :-)
So being back on tramadol is weird and sometimes I beat myself up for it.
But there is something else...I have been using JWH-018 daily for the past week. JWH-018 is a synthetic cannabinoid that binds, of course, to the cannabinoid receptors. If you're lost, marijuana contains many natural cannabinoids (THC being the main one) that binds to the cannabinoid receptors. So, effects of JWH-018 are similar to those of marijuana, except JWH effects are more intense and shorter lasting. JWH is legal in many states, but the DEA are catching on. A friend is blending together useless herb leafs and spraying it down with JWH-018 that he has ordered online. Roll it up in a "joint" and all it takes is a few hits.
Go to wikipedia and look up JWH-018 is you're curious. I just can't believe I've been using it. They don't know much about it. Only that it was made for research and it binds to the cannabinoid receptors very snugly. It mixes very well with my tramadol. I will take a couple of "hits" of JWH-018 and then feel so much better. The synergy with the tramadol is unreal. I definitely need to slack up on JWH-018. I used to smoke marijauana from 2004-2009 and I never felt cravings or a "need" to use it like I do with JWH-018.
Ok....1st time posting....I was a recreational user of Tram for 3 -5 years,,,not sure, been kinda of cloudy. It's been 10 days without....WOW. Tried to stop in the past, but never made it past 2-3 days. I've never been on any AD, but thinking of asking MD to consider. Reason I stopped in the 1st plase was the feeling of constinantly being depressed. Anybody in the same boat as me? I was never a depressed person before I started and would hate to rely on another pill to keep me going. Also, I was on Lunesta & PHARM swithed me to Ambian. I get some sleep 3-5 hours..RLS kills me!!!!!!!!! Energy is a come and go thing, but getting through it...I haven't told anyone about this..nobody has a clue, but the wife says I've been very non engaging when I'm around people (while I was on the Tram). Would like any thoughts on my situation!!!!!!!!
Hey there coach and WTG on be 10 days Tram free!! There are quite of few people that feel Tram is actually harder to quit then other pills because not only is it a synthetic opiate it has that wonderful AD in it also. That is probably one of the reasons you are feeling depressed and before had to keep taking Tram to keep from being depressed. I myself had no idea that Tramadol contained an AD until I found this journal and this web site. Just a couple of helping ideas to help with it that worked really well for me was I started taking St Johns Wort and 5htp (just according to the instructions) to help with the depression and anxiety. Both are natural supplements and both are relatively inexpensive and can be found at Wal-Mart, CVS, Walgreens etc. RLS was the worst part for me also and I found for me stretching my leg muscles really well before bed, a hot bath or shower and I take Hyland's Restful Legs (also available at the same stores) about a half hour to and hour before bed extremely helpful. I am currently 35 days Tram Free and doing really well with the occassionaly revisit from the RLS monster which is not any where near as bad as in the beginning. As for the energy thing that takes a little more time to come back but mine is getting there little by little everyday. Keep hanging in there because you are really going to see a lot more improvement each day now. Not to say you wont have a bad one sometimes but it is mostly feeling better and better now. If you have any more questions or just want to vent or update post away, it has been quiet here the past few days but that is normal due to the weekend. Take care and keep up the wonderful work! Blessings, Lisa
Hey Coach- the depression was a big issue for me too. It is the thing that kept me taking those horrible pills, couldn't get past that first few days either. This time I have made it!! Now I am on day 24!! I got an antidepressant from my doctor- helped a lot. I never told him about my addiction, but probably should have- just couldnt do it. But he gave me the AD and i started it the day i went off the trams. You may want to try the 5htp and B complex to help if you don't want to try an AD. I agree with sweetstang and the HALT theory- hungry- angry- lonely- tired- Make sure you meet your basic needs during this time of recovery. Put as much of a bubble around yourself for a little while as you can. I notice when am hungry or tired especially, I have more difficulty. I have been keeping protein bars nearby and make sure I do all I can to get good sleep. Now I have attempted to channel my anger toward these pills- I honestly am VERY angry about what I have done to myself and so that supports my motivation to be forever free.
Pretty sure i am going to gain wt, but whatever....at this point I am working on one thing at a time. :). I BELIEVE that exercise would help everyone, including me, with the anxiety and depression, but I have yet to get my self up to exercise. That's actually my next goal....
At day 24, I am doing fairly well. Still having periods of weirdness - lol, but I expect them and just keep going anyway.
Fight on tram warriors!! You can beat this pill! You are done listening to all the lies it tells you....they are many! Stay strong!
Hard to believe sometimes that I've gone that long without trams! Im not gonna lie tho, if someone offered them to me right now, I would struggle to say no. I, maybe unlike some have not worked out everythink quite yet. Mad at myself for gettin in this situation with the headaches in the first place, by taking more and more trams and other pills. Have had a bad headache all afternoon/evening and just feel like crap. Feels like I live moreso with a headache than without and I'm so sick of it, and sick of complaining about it.
Definatetly think the trams had reduced my apptetite at times like some of you have mentioned. Now I don't have trams, I look to fodd. Always feel hungry and this ***** as I am trying...and trying to lose weight. If I could rid myself of these headaches, would be more interested in working out. Other than the active job, walking the dog and usual house/yard work. Plan on getting back to the gym end of the month. Suspended it for a month until I got through this period. Trying to cut out/reduce the soda too, thats a constant battle. Not that I drink a lot as it is, maybe 1/day, but still feel its bad. I think your right though Beth, one thing at a time as far as exercise, and I do think it will benefit of when we get to that point. I did read that the 5htp(I think this one) says it suppresses appetite..is there any truth to this. It was like $20 at GNC...does it really help?
5htp suppresses carb cravings (and hunger) by stabilizing serotonin levels. The food cravings are all about the body trying to compensate for the plummet in serotonin once we quit taking tramadol. Since 5htp is converted to serotonin, it helps level off the appetite (and perhaps suppress it for some. I took it for a good while after quitting and it REALLY helped me. This is an individual call, and each person has to do their research and make sure it's safe for them. It can be quite helpful for many of us.
Exercise does help, but in the beginning, it's often hard to do it. I remember, goodness knows. I recall being unable to walk more than a hundred feet about ten days out from quitting. I was that incapacitated with fatigue and pain. But whatever you can do will help. And don't worry about the weight gain -- honestly, it's just a quick rebound effect of the serotonin deficit many of us experience after quitting, and supplements like 5htp can help. Even if you gain a few pounds, you will be able to take them off once your serotonin reestablishes itself. The cravings do leave! I promise.
5htp can help with sleep as well. It helped me a great deal once I discovered it. Just do your research and make sure it's safe for you to take it. If you have questions, ask your pharmacist so you'll have peace of mind.
In the mean time, just make sure you eat a balanced diet with plenty of protein (keeps blood sugar steady, and helps keep serotonin stable). Also, proteins and fiber help keep you feeling full for longer periods of time.
This stuff is tough to get off of! It takes time. Just plain old time. That's what brings everything back together and, one day soon, it's all going to make sense for you again.
WOW all these journal reading are amazing....they have help me so much....I have been taking Tramadol off and on for about 9 months and the last few of those months I have been taking them everyday...started out taking them for serve migraines... and then I keep taking them because they gave me energy and helped me lose weight. Now I can't stop taking them because my body starts to ache when I don't and I feel extremely tired. I'm going to start tomorrow tapering and will use all the advice that I learn from these journal readings and will be Tramadol free very soon God willing....please pray for me ....I have been through many!!!! battle in my life and have made it through them and I will be a survivor at the end of this battle....
THANK You all for the advice and the wonderful words of encouragement!!!!!!!!!
Have noticed further into the thread that Emily has given a address for postings - so perhaps do a cut and paste - I am about to do that too -
Like you I have had some real battles - with pain, with life, and with medications - in fact I had a doozy with another medication for sleep - a story that is too hideous to go into now - but there is a Class Action launched about that medication -
For most of us we started off just simply looking for relief from pain - and ultimately we have been made to face the real fact of life - you have to take it on board as part of life and learn how to cope with it and not mask it - there are too many medications that pull a veil over the problem and sneak another one in for you -
I'm in day 5 - gotta get up early and go to work for the first time since I stopped - and keep thinking about the possibility there is a tablet that fell out accidentally in one of my bags that I might find just to get me through tomorrow - of course I could just see my GP and have 60 of those tablets in my hands for the next 30 days -
Not gonna do it - could do it, want to do it, but not gonna do it - because my body is telling me what is right and wrong - I can't remember the last time I really knew how I felt without some medication in me -masking or manufacturing pain...I want to know how I REALLY am ...
Love to all of you - trust your instincts and don't be lured back...xx J
And to Emily
thank you so much for starting all this up - it has obviously helped so many people before me -
its early days for me - and I am so depressed an agitated - and got the whole joint ache thing starting in during the last hour again - I am worried mostly about the depression aspect and how long that is going to last - I live alone and need to work - the thought of the alarm going off in the morning is already worrying me - how to get to work on time - When I was taking Tramadol I would wake at about 4-5am without fail, get up and take my Tramadol for the morning, get into bed and wait for it to kick in which would time roughly with the alarm so I could rush to get ready for work - I don't really know how I am going to do it now...
Day 14 here!!! I seem to have good days and bad days still.
But yesterday was AWESOME! I felt more normal then I had in a loooong time! I was happy, got things done, had some energy, and no severe depression. Sunday was not so good. I realized I am effected by sun. And it rained black clouds all day. I was REALLY down and couldn't concentrate and just didn't function too well. Then I got upset that I felt so discouraged after all I was improving and then I had a major slump. It was very depressing!
My only symptoms now are mood swings and the muscle thing where I feel anxious and like my muscles tense up. It is coming farther and fewer between though. Must be similar to the RLS but I get it several times throughout the day and I am not sleeping too hot either.
I have found when I do sleep better wow my moods are TEN times better and when I keep a constant blood sugar level. Lots of protein.
This is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO worth it people. Just keep telling youself that. The first 7 days is the worst and with some bad days thrown in after that but all in all I feel better all the time! I HATE HATE HATE this drug. I still have like 20 pills sitting there and I have NOOOO desire to take them. Why the heck do I even have them. LOL I may as well toss them in the toilet.
I am so happy as I see little glimpses of the real me coming back. I almost felt like I have been numb for years on this stuff. yes I had energy and increased sense of well being as long as I kept upping my dose and then it leveled off only to feel even worse unless I took more. I feel like I am starting to be able to concentrate more. Not so much of in a hurry or ADD ish. I was flying by the seat of my pants all the time on trams. Unable to focus for too long. (I have been dx as having ADD though so maybe it was part of that) but.... I can actually focus more now. When the w/d hit and they still do I can't focus but when I feel "normal" I feel so great!
Pleaes PLEASE all you new people keep fighting this is just too worth it not to! I was so ready though.
Hugs and love to all,
howcouldIknow: My heart goes out to you and I don't know what to say. Except that I have btdt with relapse in the past and all I can say is that you really need to be so sick and tired of this CRAP that you don't want to have it in your life at all anymore. It ROBS you. Don't listen to the lies any longer. and don't trade one drug for another. I wouldnt do the thing you are talking about as you are just moving from addiction to addiction my friend. You need something to fill that empty void in your heart besides pills, meds, drugs whatever. Do something GOOD for your body. take 5 htp as others suggested. Go on l-tyrosone for energy if you need it. St johns wart. Eat right excercise. you will feel so much better.
I am NOT here to judge you as I have soooo been where you are at. But the only thing that will pull you out my friend is a hatred for feeling like you do a hatred for this drug or any drug that blocks you from being your potential. I so feel for you. I feel your pain. Hugs to you and thinking/praying for you!!!
Thanks LeeAnn for your advice. Think I might just pick up some of that 5htp now. Added in the B12 last week, not sure how fast these things take. Already added the Hylands and bought the Melatonin, but found I only took it those first few days. Besides my cat waking my up at the usual 4AM hour, I have been sleeping fine..actually too much again, need to push up my wake up time an hour again(I primarily work 2nd shift). I know I have to get up sooner too, the headaches seem worse the longer I sleep. I really need to go to the store and get some more healthy foods here. Feel like a walking pharmacy with all the vitamins I'm taking!
Headache is gone from last night..thank god. Just a real faint one lingers, trying to remember to drink H2O. Sometimes get busy and realize...Yup thirst..haven't been drinking enough.
Hang in there Constance and whitewingeddove. Those first 5 days were brutal. I can honestly say that after the first week, things get better. Just hang in there. I would be lying if I wasn't still craving those damn white pills, but know I can't go back to that. And the "oh I will just take one, will just multiply to two..etc, etc.)
Day 11??? Getting better...Still RLS and little sleep, but more positive thinking during the day and staying busy helps ALOT....Football practice tonight...been tough the last couple time, so not really looking forward to it...The life of a peewee football coach:)
When will I get that full night sleep??????I think that's the thing that has my energy drained and headaches around 2 and 5 p.m. Mornings are great for me, when I wake full of energy & down hill...sort of...during the day!
coach~it depends on your dose and length of use, but the energy is slow in coming back for many, including myself. I am taking an antidepressant wellbutrin, which has helped me a lot. Tram also has an antidepressant in it, so going off of it sometimes causes depression. your sleep and rls should be getting much better soon so keep the faith. you may want to tr melatonin or unisom to help get a little more sleep but dont make it a habit. good luck, and congrats on 11 days.
Coach- it does get better....really it does. It sometimes seems like feeling bad just goes on and on, but you will come out of it soon. For me the first 7 days were bad, and then the next 7 were much better- just not great. During the first 14 days I had fairly good periods that had an increasing time span and frequency. On day 26 now I am feeling good- having periods where my energy is good and I feel close to my old self again. I have also had good mornings- feel awesome when I get up. Seems like the evenings whe I get more tired have been bad on many days, but even the evenings are getting much better. My fatigue comes and goes. I think the main thing is that you will progressively feel better, but therre will be hours or maybe even days when you feel like cr*p. My spells of feeling that way are definitely less all the time. Today I felt really super good most of the day, and then this evening had about 2 hrs when I felt the faqtigue and anxiety. I am resigned to this pattern knowing this will at some point be gone. :)
I had definitely come to the hatred point with the pills. I too have attempted to get off for good several times before, This time have been very different- partly d/t all you awesome people here, but also I now for some reason I finially see the tremendous damage that has been done. I feel so good to be free! I felt guilty every single time I shoulved a pill in my mouth- THATS a LOT of GUILT!! But no guilt now, just anger at the lost time and relationships, humbleness each day I succeed, great thankfulness that I am free, and determination not to repeat this history lesson. The lies of tramadol are enormous. The better I feel, the more I realize what I was doing to myself- it just solidifies my feelings about the addiction. Its hard to realize the entire impact until you are off for a bit and look back.
Hope everyone is having a great evening, My prayers are with you all for success in getting and staying off these devil pills!!
Yes, there is an end in sight! Just stay the course, and I promise, things will get better. Your energy will return. First probably in random spurts, then longer periods of time, then MOST of the time with just a few brief dips now and then, and eventually, for good. I wish I could tell you a day when it will happen, but unfortunately, with this drug that's impossible. It is so non-linear, the recovery process. It's up and down for the first couple of months, and then a more stable improvement happens for most people after that. Just stick to your plan, and tough out the tough spots knowing they're going to become fewer and less tough in time.
Beth, your post is so inspiring! It pays all of us to remember (REALLY remember) the hatred we have for this drug.. We can't forget that. That's one of the biggest benefits of journaling, in my opinion. Aside from being cathartic and blazing a path for those who come after, it's always good to be able to go back in time to when we were breaking free, to remember how awful it was and how hard we had to fight, so that we never, ever forget. We cannot ever allow the bad things to fade, as we so often do, and remember only the good. (There really wasn't any true good to begin with, not with this poison. The costs from the start are tremendous.) Revisit it, remember it, and keep it with you. It will make you stronger and much less likely to ever slip into the trap again.
Strength, warriors. Just stay the course. Better days are coming to you.
Hate to------ good to------ see the new posts. I hope that you find the kind of support here that I did.
I don't think I have ever read anything that in someway didn't touch me. Always the one thing or one sentence that I could relate to and find help with. It still is amazing to me how alone I am not. I am slowly losing the guilt game. I know I cannot place blame on anyone else but so relieving to see that I am not the only one that got sucked in by this evil addiction. My over abuse is my own and hopefully this fight I prevail will keep me strong in remember why I don't ever want to go back. I am just over my 30 day mark and doing well. Still have some w/d symptoms everyday (or maybe I just associate it to w/d) but I have no hestiations about going foward. I just can't imagine going back. The first two weeks of hell overwith thinking I will never get through this are definately behind me. It can happen, I did start to slowly feel better, everyday some new insight to see me through to the next. Please everyone stay strong, make your mind strong it really does help. Stay with us here and fight this thing through. It is worth every second for us all.
Hi Everyone! What inspiring words!! Day 43 for me and it has been a great day...all day long. Yeah!!! I did have a little RSL last night and still take something for sleep most of the time. Keeping up with vitamins, good nutrition and continuing to try to keep moving. So grateful to have me back, even if it is for a day or so. The awful depression has not returned for a few days but I am afraid to say it's gone. I'll just take today. When the anxiety and shallow breathing were the worst, I did the breath of count to 5 in and exhale for 10. It really helped the episodes to subside. Not forgetting the crippling sadness this drug caused is key for me. It needs to be taken off the market. Period. Coming off even a small dose has been hell. I will keep the memory fresh.
All you new folks who are in the early days, hang in there. Be easy on yourself. I found curling up in the dark and watching movies with my little boy helped. And comfort food..go for it. Nourish your soul as you ditch this drug. I did a lot of praying and soul searching while I was in this raw place...and it is a raw place. Taking brisk walks in the morning right after my coffee seemed to make those days better. I took lots of advil for my throbbing head. Wrap yourself up with love and care for yourself. You deserve it. I kept telling myself to be a friend to myself....it really helped. The claws of this drug are chemical and brutal on the body, brains, and emotions. It is NOT your fault. It does come out of your system and amazingly enough, good days start connecting together. I have lots of energy today but honestly the dark place was so bad,that I felt hopeless even a month into it. There was enough feeling better to keep heading into the wind. Your body and spirit are an amazing thing. Deep down your body knows the tram is going and will thank you for the peace and start showing you by resuming healthy function. The physical symptoms have been much easier than the awful depression and energy loss. Keep going, day by day...the light will break through, I promise.
I would not have been able to do it without these posts. Thank you. Much love and strenth
Another bad headache and just feeling drained...think if I didn't have the headache, I would feel a thousand times better. Neuro Md said it could take 3 months to completely break the rebound cycle. Really hope this works, otherwise I'm trying botox...swear to god, can't deal with these anymore. Off today and so mad that I feel like this again, had so much I wanted to do. Once again, another day spent in misery and pain. So sick of this. And I'm not gonna lie..wish I had a tram or vicoden, something to relieve this pain. Not supposed to take anything per md, took 2 tylenol..regretting now since it didn't do a darn thing. Guess I will just try laying down for a while. Also just feel bad...always have big intentions of taking my dog for a great long walk, and just feel like crap and just get angry as he does not walk good on leash most of the time...sniffing beagle. Hope tomorrow is better =(
For those that have been free for more then a couple weeks what main symptoms are you still having?
I am getting energy back woooohoooo!! feeling much much much less anxious but my main symptoms now are muscle tensing in the evening and some mood swings. Taking benedryl before bed still too and still wake up and stay up sometimes between 2-4 am.
There is nothing like being free. I see glimpses of the real me coming back! Love it!!!
Newbie warriors this is soooo worth the first week of hell! I actually feel less anxious off tramadol (now that i am over main withdrawals) then i did while taking it.
Sometimes i would wake up feeling anxious while on trams I haven't had nearly as much anxiety now that i am off it for 15 days! my blood pressure is lower too!
Dang i love this!! Being guilt free! Free from being so anxious i was going to run out! etc etc!
I wish I would have realized long ago how good it feels to be free! It is just so worth it!
I still get the down in the dumps feeling especially on rainy cloudy days but looking back i had them while on trams!
These pills are excellent little deceivers!
Have you thought of checking into food intolerances?
Gluten is a huge one for headaches, joint pain etc etc!
Are you getting enough protein? Ever had blood glucose levels checked?
How about hormones?
Those are some of the main reasons for headaches! Aspertame in diet sodas! MSG's in prepackaged foods! Not drinking enough water! Too much coffee!
I would look into those sweetie!
consider chiropractic care and or a good naturpathic dr!
I did actually lay down yesterday for a bout an hour, closed my eyes, and then watched a little Ellen. Felt better, got up, did a few more chores and walked my dog..a good walk too.
Nutrition is my next hurdle to tackle. I have been keeping track of headaches/and a food diary. My md gave a list of bad food/good foods for headaches. A low Tyramine Headache Diet. Doesn't say anything about beverages on there however. Just so hard to first give up my meds, then give up all these foods/drinks too. Its so limited and I do see a chiropracter, wasn't helping the headaches at all, so thats what prompted me to see the Neurologist again. The chiro. warned me about the aspartane...ya in soda, gum, those damn little crystal light packages that make it much easier to drink water. Tryin to cut out those and see if anything triggers them. Have had about 3-4 bad headaches since stopping trams, so not sure yet. I know my allergies are bad right now too, which prolly isn't helping either. Another thing I stuggle with is sleep patterns..they change depending on my which job I work at(I have two). One job is first, one is primarily 2nd. So I don't have a regular schedule which I know doesn't help either. So we'll see. Thanks for your ideas and glad to hear you are doing well..yay!!!
Hello out there....Update onday 14....feeling a little better dayby day...still headaches about 2pm or so...Not sure if from Tram or sinus. RLS getting the better of me & the wife..can't stop jumping at night. That's the biggest for me..if no RLS and full night sleep..think I might have licked this by now. Good luck to all of you.
Two more days until I celebrate 30 days free! I can tell you that I am feeling pretty good now. Have a few bad spells that come with anxiety-sneezing-fogginess but these are less frequent all the time- maybe an hour a day or some days now none at all. I was on trams for 10 yrs. I'm sure you all are sick of me reporting how long I was on trams, but I want people out there reading these posts to know they CAN get off this horrible stuff. In my first week, I could not even imagine I would make it to this point. I have failed to get off before, but not this time. So, if I can get off after 10 yrs, you can get off too! It's not easy, but just be strong and take one day at a time, one moment at a time. Thanks to everyone on here who encouraged me. All you who are in your first week, just hang in there! You will soon be feeling good again. The agony of the first week really does not last forever.
Blessedmommy- you will have a few bad days still, or parts of days. the thing is, that every time I had a horrible day, a really good one was right around the corner- a day that is better than ever. It crappy days/ hours will slowly diminish with each passing day, but it takes time. I had about 1 hr this evening that I felt that weird anxiety and creppy feeling like the RLS. Now when this happens, I just figure it will be short lived and move on the best I can until soon it is gone again. Day 28 for me. I feel tons better now than when I was at day 16, so dont give up! You will get past this day and look to soon having all good days. Now I am starting to not think about it all the time. Taking trams, counting trams, and waiting till my next dose- that is gone
(hooray!!) so I am developing new patterns of life that make up my day. Nights are worse for me too, but mornings are awesome. I always feel so good in the morning. Thats a dramatic difference for me. When I was on trams, I always felt really bad in the am- until I took one. Then I would think- here we go....like a rat on a wheel...I felt like that- like I was running fast and furious with no real focus. Now thats gone. I DO NOT feel that way anymore- now I am relaxed (most of the time) and moving at a good pace- calm and able to concentrate. Soooooo nice to feel that way again. You have a right to be a little grumpy, just done expect to be feeling 100% better yet.
I think everyone has their own rate of recovery, but it is clear that many similarities od WD and recovery are still present. BE PATIENT !!! It will come if you just stick it out!! One day at a time and soon you will be forgetting to even think about it because you feel pretty good!!Hope everyone has a peaceful and restful night,
Hey blessedmommy I am 38 days free now and still occassionally get the RLS monster visiting me also I get cranky or aggitated time to time still. It is more fleeting now, only lasting a few minutes to maybe an hour. It still happens this far out but it becomes more and more rare and at least for me a little easier to deal with. Just keep telling yourself that this too shall pass ;o) Oh and Beth I too still get what I call the "sneezys" from time to time. Thought I had developed an allergy or something but I read else where people clean longer than I still had occassional sneezing fits. Have to go finish up some laundry now. Take everyone, and be patient and kind to yourselves! Blessings, Lisa
Still have a headache..but other than that, feeling pretty good. Still have cravings, esp since I still have the headaches, but I try and remind myself that my tolerance was so high, that I would require multiple trams to relieve the headache and its just no worth it. Trying to tell myself that....Have a great weekend everyone...
Made it to 30 days free!! I can tell you I wondered if I could do it- especially the first 2 weeks of WD. Hang in there- those of you who are lurking or just beginning your withdrawl. You can do it- just read the posts here and learn how to help yourself. This is a great place for support. It truly was my only support, since I had no one else who could support me. Thank you to everyone here!!
All my love to all
Had a dream last night I was in the phamacy and was asked by the pharmacist what med I WAS taking and they gave me 2 pills. (now mind you I used to work in two pharmacies...I know...kid in a candy store)...and I accepted them. Didn't take them, but still accepted the pills. Kinda weird. But was struggling to get going yesterday(we had a party to go to) and I had yet another headache as was kinda anxious and uncomfortable most of the day..cravings all day. .But by late evening realized I made it all day and the headache had actually mostly gone away...who knew.... Take care everyone!
A very good Monday morning to everyone!! I have a quick question I hope someone has insight into for me. I am currently starting day 42 Tram free and have been taking both St. John's Wort and 5htp each day to help stave off any lingering depression and/or anxiety. Well, I was looking around on-line to be certain it is safe to take both these supplements together and have been finding so much conflicting information. They seem to have helped a lot and I experienced very little depression after those first 7 days of WDs when I started taking them. I read one thing saying not to take them together and turn around and find something else that says they are just fine to take together in lower doses. I don't want to overdo the supplements after finally breaking free of the tramadol but I also don't want to sabatoge myself if they are truly helping. So if any of you all have an idea about this or more info. I would greatly appreciate it ;o) Oh and Beth BIG Congrats on making it 30+ days!!! It is wonderful to see more and more people breaking free of this horrible drug! I sometimes read on the main addiction forum on MedHelp and I am shocked to see how many Dr.s are still prescibing this medication and telling people either it's not a narcotic or that it isn't addictive. Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well and feeling healthier. Take care and keep up the good fight! Blessings, Lisa
Hi everyone.... I haven't posted on here before but I have been reading a post or two here and there for awhile. Ive been taking the Tramadol 50mg for right at a year now.....pretty much to the day. I obviously take more then my dr. had advised me to because of that so called "happy feeling it gave me" I was probably up to taking about 7-8 of them a day which I think equals out to about 400mg a day. Weird thing I just have to mention is my Dr wanted to take me off of the Tramadol....yay do Dr., because it doesn't interect well with my current anti-depressant medication I am currently on ( Celexa ) so she tells me I should taper myself off of them. Yeah ok.... so I started trying to do the taper thing....the first "bad" feeling I got.... I basically said to heck with it and just took them how I had been. I couldn't take the pain. It was too much. I was getting about 60 pills that would last me right at about 2 weeks.....sometimes. I learned when my isurance would let me refill them and sometimes I would watch the calender like a hawk and refill them on that day (11 days) My Dr. ( who by the way is EXTREMLY FORGETFUL ) decided to up my prescription from the 60 pills to 120, now they had to last me longer but really not that much longer...my insurance gave me an extra week was alll, so this to me was like the jackpot. Oh btw I was/am taking these for headaches. That's all.... I have 2 brain lesions that give me headaches and I cannot take anything with tylenol in it so Tramadol was all they would give me. I even went into my Dr. office and told them I wanted something else. I didn't want anymore tramadol. I think I finally hit a point that I realized I had a problem and wanted away....not bad enough that I would do it without having something else in it's place though. Like I said before the withdrawl pain is to much for me, or so I though anyways. Ok so moving on.... my Dr. said there wasn't anything else they could or even felt comfortable giving me other then the Tramadol, so what did I get?? Another rx for the Tramadol...go figure. Now it's bad.... it's real bad and I honestly want off of this stuff, I really do. I am currently on day 2 of having no tramadol. Yesterday was day 1 and I felt so sick I though I was dying. I stayed home from work today thinking I was going to feel the same and to tell you the truth I kind of feel ok. It's not that bad. I feel really lazy and like I have no energy what so ever...but as far as the sick feeling, it's not there. I am sure though by reading the posts out here it will come back again. I just hope this time I am really strong enough to not go back to it to relieve the discomfort. I know I can't take it forever. I have 2 pills left right now ( and 1 refill for 120 pills pending at the pharmacy ) and I have been 2 days strong of not taking those 2 pilIs I have left ( even with all of the discomfort I went through yesterday ) but not yet strong enough to flush them either. I still have that "don't get rid of them just in case" in the back of my head. I am just having a really hard hard hard time with everything right now. I left my husband 2 weeks ago and took our daughter with me. We moved back into my mothers house for now. ( I'm 26 yrs old ) and now I am having to deal with this crappy withdrawl on top of everything, and it seems easier to take the pills and make it all better, but I haven't and I am trying to convince myself that I can't and shouldn't and yada yada. It's just hard really really hard. Well I just had to tell someone about this. My mom just thinks I have been "sick" as does my husband. Niether of them know. I haven't felt comfortable telling anyone about it. Well until now that is, but I still don't feel comfortable telling them. Ok i am off to get some food. Wish me luck..... I am hoping I have enough will power to not take them again but we'll see.
*Sorry if my post seems unorganzied, I can't think straight and I don't have my glasses on, LOL.
Ok it's been 6 hours since my last post and I have been in and out of the sickness all day. Right now I am good. I at least got the room cleaned and the laundry almost done. I feel fine at the moment like nothing at all is wrong. I know it won't last though :( I have taken 2 immodiums today because of the stomach cramps I keep getting ( those are AWFUL!! ) btw... I heard on another site somewhere that the immodium really helps and let me tell you IT DOES!!!! I have also taken 2 dayquils and since I have taken those I have been feeling fine. I have actually been mobile and getting things done, talking to people on the phone and feeling good. I would recommend trying those too. My refill I was last speaking of has been ready for pick up for a few hours now and I have managed to resist. I also btw, haven't taken those other 2 I still have, although I am still unable to flush them. I have been just telling myself that I really really really REALLY don't want to have to go through this awful pain and discomfort again. I have heard people mention the RLS part of it and I really know what you mean. It's terrible. Especially when I am trying to go to bed. I end up flinging my legs around like a crazy person trying to get the pain to stop ( it didn't help ). I took nyquil and an immodium before I went to bed last night and that helped out alot. Ok well I am hoping to have a good night....hoping the sick feeling stays away because I am going to work tomorrow on what will be my day 3 of no trams. I hope it goes well.
Hey Ashley I am sorry no one has responded to your post yet. It has been a bit quiet around here lately. I am currently 42 days Tramadol free but I still remember those awful RLS! That alone almost had me caving the first 5 days. They have something called Hyland's Restful Legs or Leg Cramps that worked a ton for me. I still take it from time to time when my legs feel a little twitchy at night. They have it at Wal-Mart, Walgreens or CVS and it costs less than 5.00. It it usually by the vitamins and supplements. You are so close to being through the worst of the WDs if you can just hang in there. May I recommend that first thing tomorrow you call your pharmacy and cancel your Tramadol re-fill? When I stopped I also stopped all possible ways I could get my pills. If there wasn't a way to get them then I didn't have that temptation. If you have any questions or just want to post and vent I will try and check back often this week and be as helpful as I can ;o) I am over a month off of this horrible drug and can honestly say it was so worth it. I have my life back now and am no longer chasing after a pill and constently count pills and making sure I always have enough. It is so freeing not to have to think about that all the time. Stay strong and keep updating. Blessings, Alicia
Ashley-hang in there, it really does get better, but I'm not gonna lie..I still have cravings and refills available at my pharmacy. And DAILY I still think about picking them up. The only strong thing holding me back is I through out the bottle, so calling and talking to somewhere there just kinda weakens me.."like really, I will stoop that low again for pills, am I that desperate?" Plus I know the new rx that my MD put me on interacts with the trams, so they may say something if I try to refill it. Not strong enough to discountine the rx yet. Just so frurstrating to still be dealing with these headaches, if the trams didn't take my pain away completely at least I had energy and was "happy" I guess. It was such a routine for me, the times I would take those darn things and I sometimes feel lost, like what's missing? Just takin it one day at a time.
Thank you guys for responding to me. I am on my day 3. Still havne't taken any but still haven't done anything with the 2 I have left and my refill is still sitting at the pharmacy. I just really really really don't want to have to go through this again. That is what is stopping me. I feel as though I have 2 full days in the "bank" so to speak, so why not just keep going with it, would I really want to have to start this all over again? Like I said before I know they aren't going to give them to me forever, my Dr. who is so forgetful is going to remember one of these days that I am not supposed to take it with my other medication. Anyways.....moving forward. I am doing ok so far. I just started getting the headache. It's been throbbing for a good hour now, but I am at work today, at least I made it here. It kind of feels good to be around other people too. I know what you are talking about sweetstang... it never took my pain away really either, but it sure did give me energy and boosted my mood a few degrees. That's why I think I liked it so much, and I think that's why I am having such a hard time getting rid of them, I keep having that thought in the very back of my head like " what if something happens and I REALLY need them?" but that's always followed by the " Do you really, honestly want to have to go through this god awful feeling again" and my answer is no, I don't want to go through this again. EVER.... and I know I will be able to flush those couple pills I still have.... soon.... I hope. I don't know if the length of time has anything to do with how long the WD lasts but I really hope it ends soon. I hate feeling lazy and this headache is horrible. I have taken it for a year.... and probably at 400mg a day for at least 9 months out of that year, before that it was 50mg a day gradually increasing over those 3 months, but I never took more then 400mg in a day. It was the immediate release, not extended. Ugh..... I am just ready for this WD to be over and done with. I am ready to feel "normal" again...whatever "normal" really is. I hate feeling like crap.
Does anyone know of anything to make this headache any better, or the "flu" type feeling a little easier?? Anything would be helpful. I am taking DayQuil at the moment but anything that has worked for anyone else out there would be helpful. I truly hate this feeling. blah!
Ok I took 2 motrin I got from someone here at work, and to my amazement, the headache went away!!! I just can't believe that. Hmmm..... Hopefully all goes well tonight as I will be ending my day 3 of no trams cold turkey. Today has really been on and off again for me. I feel sick like flu sick and then I feel fine, it keeps going back and forth, weird. Right now I feel ok, my head feels better, nothing seems to be aching, well my eyes sort of do, but I think that's because I have been going back and reading the tons of posts that have been posted on here, LOL, but reading all of the previous posts make me feel not so lonely in all of this. This is just a great place and all of the previous posts are so encouraging. I haven't looked at my online account with my pharmacy since about 9am this morning. I have been staring that evil Tram refill in the eye, almost laughing at it in a sense, like "HA...you want me to come and get you, but I'm not haha". That might seem a little strange but it works, LOL. Ok since I have got nothing accomplished here at work except read this forum.... I had better get something done.... I'll check up again when I get home :)
I have been reading other posts on tramadol addiction and haven't come across any where the person is or has been addicted to a large amount of pills. I currently take 30 tramadol a day and want to quit but seem unable to taper. I can't just quit because I will seize if I don't die first. Has anyone out there tackled this large amount successfully? How did you do it? Did you have help? I am really scared because I know this can't be good for me, I am in debt due to them and I don't know how to go about quitting. I'd like to deal with those who know this drug, if possible. Someone out there knows my dilemma...please tell me how you have done it. Many thanks.
Today when I woke up I actually felt like a brand new person. It was a little strange to be honest. I had the tummy cramps that I couldn't get rid of before I went to bed, but that was really it. The tummy cramps just started coming back again within the past hour but other then those I feel ok. No headache, muscle cramps ( aside from tummy ), no flu feeling. I still feel like I have no energy and I am sure that part of it will last for a while to come still. I also heard mention in some of the previous posts that there were a couple people taking Wellbutrin since stopping the Tramadol. I am taking that also. I am taking the Wellbutrin XL. I am supposed to take 300mg a day. ( 150mg twice in the am ). I haven't had any "Blues" since stopping the Tramadol...maybe that is why...but I was on Celexa before stopping the Tramadol and then switched to the Wellbutrin literally right after I quit taking the trams. Anyhow it seems to be working fine. I don't think I have had any weird side effects, but really I don't know. I am only on day 4 and I would think most of whats going on is just from the WD of the trams. Anyhow.... hope today stays just as good as it is now.
Ok my tummy is really hurting and for some reason my immodium isn't working so well. Ugh.... guess I am going to make a trip to the drug store and see if I can find anything else to take.... any ideas, if anyone is out there??? If my stomach wasn't hurting I would be A-OK this stinks!! Oh another question I wanted to ask anyone.... has anyone tried those little 5 hour energy drinks??? I wouldn't be able to try it now because my stomach hurts so bad, but I wonder if those little things give you any kind of energy?
20 days out & things are looking much better....RLS getting better (WHEW)... One questions for anyone to answer....I bought a new TV & it seems everything is in 3D..so I started to think about it today while driving & I get that same feeling in general...everything in a 3D sort of state ...Is that the fog lifting? Energy improving a little and mood still crappy some times, but compared to week ago WAY better.
Rockandahardplace~I was up to 20 to 30 a day and I did a super fast taper. I went from 25 to 20 to 15 and then slowed it down more. If you do taper, and it is really hard to do at that dose, but it can be done. I relapsed a few times before going on an antidepressant this last time, which really helped. I am over a month T free and free pretty good. T put me in debt to the point of bankruptcy so I can definately relate to your sitatuation. Send me a message if you need any advice or just want to vent. Not many people have been on such a high dose like that on here that I have seen in a while. It isnt hard to get there though. Good luck. You can do this. After day 9 I was all good. the first 4 days are the hardest. How long have you been on that dose? That determines your length of withdrawal moew than anything, but t withdrawals are not linear at all.
Ok winding down DAY 4! Today was actually alot better then I was expecting it to be. ( aside from the stomach pain ) I am not going to lie though, I went through all of my immodium ( it seemed to have stopped working ) so I went and got some Pepto and that helped ( at first ) and then didn't seem to do anything. That stomach pain is SOMETHING let me tell you. So I ended up getting 1/2 a Loratab from a friend. I hope that doesn't mess with my WD here. It made my tummy pain go away though. THANK GOD. BTW I did manage to flush those 2 pills I had lingering in my bottle. I HAD to get rid of them.... anyways I hope tomorrow the stomach pains are GONE. The RLS has become more or less non-existant. I didn't have a problem with that at all last night or at all today ( hopefully it will stay away, we'll see though ) but these stomach pains are crippling me. I am hoping I won't have to deal with it to much longer. Ugh..... we'll see how Day 5 goes tomorrow. I've made it this far, I can't possibly turn back now, the flu feeling has subsided for now and I really really don't want to feel that again. :)
Coach..... I don't know about the 3D thing ( I am only on DAY 4 tram free. ) but I have noticed I feel different when I am outside, like the air smells different and it is just different??? I don't know if anyone else has experienced that but it's def. different. Almost refreshing?
Ashley ~ You may wanna try a probiotic. That was a huge help to me in the first 3 months. It really helped to curb the cramping and diarrhea. You can get 'em at any pharmacy. I got a generic one at walgreens for $20 (30 day supply). Be careful with the lortabs (or any other narcotic). I've been tram-free for 6 months....I got a cold/cough a couple of times once around 6 weeks out and again about 14 weeks out and I took a cough med that had hydrocodone in it. It could've just been me, but it seemed like taking it set me back a few days in my withdrawal. Again....could've just been me, but you can't be too careful.
Good for you for flushing those remaining trams! I actually kept a partial bottle after I'd stopped....Not because I thought I might want it, but because I wanted to (I know this sounds really silly) laugh at it every time I saw it! I wanted to basically say 'haha, see tramadol, I don't need you...you can sit there and call my name, but I won't give in' .....Eventually I no longer felt the need to do that and I gave it to my husband to get rid of. I still have a refill at the pharm. All I would have to do is call it in. I will not do that! This drug has done too much to me and I will NOT go back.
Hang in there ~ It gets better....slowly, but surely!
Kinda sick of the roller coaster ride..the ups and downs. Headaches seem to be worse this past week, might be the stupid weather here in the Midwest. I see my neuro. on Friday...definately gonna write stuff down to make sure I ask/tell her how bad this has sucked. I have cheated and feel guilty as hell as I have taken Excedrine 3 times this week...I can't stand these headaches and I need to be able to function at my job and I need to live too, I just can't put my life on hold for 3 months! So I'm sure the neuro. Md will not like that and might push me back further to being pain-free. But I have noticed that previously when I was on trams, I would take up to 3 excedrines a few times a day, plus trams, sometimes, plus vicodin, and more often than not the real bad headaches would not be relieved. This week when I took the excedrines, I only took 2 in one day and my headache was really improved or gone! So maybe its working, more managable headaches, although, my ultimate goal is to be pain-free here.
Ashley-not sure whats up with the abdominal cramping, but in the past(whether trams related or not) I almost thought I had IBS, so I started taking fiber supplements and eating Activia yogurt daily...Significantly has helped, no longer get those issues. Best of luck and nice job on the "flushing" I know I would've taken them by now!
Day 5!!! Today seems to be so much better then the past few days. My tummy is still cramping a little, a very little as a matter of fact. I haven't had to take and Pepto or anything thus far. No sick feeling, no headache, no nothing really. Today seems to actually be going really well. I'm shocked. Anyways.... so me and my husband went and got the other bottle I had pending at the pharm. ( He and my mother both know at this point ) and we got rid of them!!!!!!!! They are dissolving in the river...well probably dissovled by now ( I hope I didn't hurt any fish in the process, lol ). I didn't want to flush 120 of them down the toilet because I was afraid they would get stuck. That so far has probably been the hardest thing I have done this far. Flushing the 2 seemed like a cake walk but having 120 of them in your hands and throwing them to never been seen again was tough, I am glad I did it though. They are gone, and I can't refill them. Anyways. I hope today stays as good as it is right now. It's super nice outside, and I am ready to be in the sunshine.
MyFreedom & Sweetstang- First of all congrats on the both of you making it so long, I sure hope I can be that strong. Also my cramping has seemed to let up ( ALOT ) today, so I don't know what that was all about. I was thinking it was tram. realated but then I hear a bunch of people here at work talking about some kind of stomach thing going around, so I don't really know at this point what it could be from. Either way I am keeping my Pepto close and if it comes back full force like it was I will have to try some of ya'lls suggestions.
Sweetstang - It took alot not to take those 2 BELIEVE ME..... with all of the discomfort I was in...I kept thinking "just take those 2 and you will feel much better" but then I would think "why do that to yourself, you've already had to deal with the discomfort for a couple days, why start over when you have those days in the bank already" so I never took them.
I sure do hope anyone who is given Tramadol by a Dr. does a google search before starting the medication, and see's what it can do to you physically and mentally because the Dr. sure isn't going to tell you and I wouldn't wish the WD upon my worst enemy. I have never felt so bad, so sick, so helpless in my LIFE. It's just unbelieveable what this medication can do to you.
Anyhow today is going good so far.... and from what I can tell, each day has been better then the last in some way and with the exception of the stomach thing ( whatever it is ) all of the other WD symptoms have managed to stay away.... will keep you posted though ;)
Well today started out with a bang, literally. I was on my way taking my daughter to school when lo and behold, someone was driving and texting and obviously not paying attention. She slammed into the car behind me which caused that car to slam into me. It was so fast and so hard, I didn't even have time to react.... I even had to take a minute for it to process what really just happened. Me and my daughter are fine, I am making an appt for her at her Dr.'s anyway though, she complained a little, but I think she was just in shock, but with kids you can never be to careful. I have a MAJOR headache now :( I swear if it wasn't for bad luck I would have no luck at all. I just can't get past the fact that I got rear-ended this morning. That has never happened to me before. Progressive is awesome though, they already have me set up for an appt. on Tuesday to drop my car off and they said my rental will be waiting on me. No money out of my pocket ( YAY ) turns out she had the same insurance I do. Ok well anyway enough about that... I just had to vent..... I am feeling ok ( aside from the headache ) my stomach is doing alot better. The stomach ninjas with knives seem to have lost thier energy. Now I just have the tummy bubbles but the pain has subsided for now. I feel so good that I have really made it to 6 days. I would have never have thought I could do that. It doesn't seem like much really but it seems like forever to me. I honestly have to pat myself on the back. I'm not going down that path again, not that I ever intended to to begin with, but I will def. do extensive research on any medications my Dr.'s give me before I decide to put it in my body. All of you out there are wonderful and I am certain that I can make it as long as most of you have and never go back!!!!!
Ashley~glad to hear you are doing better. Time really is the one true healer in the fight against tram. I think day 9 for me was a major turning point when the withdrawals really seemed non~existent. This place is so quiet these days. I think about all of you often and wonder how you are. Pat, Leeann, beth~I miss you guys, where are you? I pray everyone is healing and getting better wuth each passing day. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think you of and how much you have all given me strength and support. Peace a love to all.
Hey everyone! I am so glad to say I am on day 37!! I really cant believe it!! It has been really quiet. Guess we need to stir things up a little. I read this every day - at least one time, but dont always post. :)
For all those who are just beginning Wd or a taper, I was there too (actually several times), but this time my anger at those horrible pills took over and I kicked it's butt!! I can truly say I have still have some WD symptoms on occasion, but overall I am steadily improving. It is not straight down hill after the initial week, so expect to have some recurring issues. But I have found that being hungery, tired, or upset, stressed really brings that stuff out again, so I am trying hard to do what I can to prevent those things. I also notice a huge difference if I dont take my B complex vitamins. But too I took that stuff for 10 yrs. I will give my body time to heal.
Ashley- hang in there! You are doing great! You are thru the worst of it. Just stay busy- thats also key. Keep you mind off yourself and how you feel- it will help. I am so proud of you for flushing!! I still come across one that I hid somewhere- sick isn't it...I had them everywhere. I have another flusing ceremony each time. the other day I found one under the seat of my car. I dont know about you but I am so glad to not be counting, cutting them in 1/2, worring about running out on a trip, waiting for Fed-Ex, etc... Horrible stuff.
Sweetstang- hope your headaches are doing better. Maybe with cooler weather on the way it will help all of us!!
Booba, Pat, Blessedmommy, Leeann, James, myfreedom, coach, lisa, and of course Emilypost- I would not be where I am without your encouragement. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am sure I forgot to mention some one- but you know who you are. :)
Blessed mommy- your baby is due VERY SOON!! Hope you are doing well!! Let us know!!
Well, this has been a very busy weekend for me, which was good medicine for me. I realized that I really do much better when I am busy and not thinking so much.
'I can do all things thru Him who strengthens me.' Dont want to forget to thank God who has helped me thru this mess and into the light!!
Well day 26 here and I am having a baby tomorrow!!!! WOOHOO!!!
So looking forward to it! Csection tomorrow 7:30 am keep me in your thoughts/prayers pretty please.
I am doing REALLY well withdrawl wise. I don't think I have much lingering w/d at all except some mild anxiety and occasional RLS in the evenings or if I sit too long. But could be the upcoming birth. I was on such a low dose that I think my body is finally starting to stabalize. I CANNOT believe I made it this far! WOW! I have a 1/2 bottle of pills still sitting there that I am tossing today! I want to burn them LOL. I haven't even touched one! I saw the bottle yesterday and there was a little voice that said "don't those look good?" and I was able to retort rigiht back. NADA!!! Not even in the slightest!!
Beth, love you girl!! You are doing so awesome and you are soooo right you have to get to the point where you hate these stupid pills. I have been on them for ALONG time!! I think 7 years off and on. More on then off.
You did it girl I am so proud of you.
Ashley the worst is behind you now or close to it. Honestly I never thought it would get better at first and here I am.
For all you that encouraged me along the way I LOVE YOU ALL!!!! I was not judged or looked down upon and for that I am forever greatful!!
Wish me luck ya all, I am having this baby! Yeah maybe my disks in my back (the reason for the tram use in the first place) will heal once she is out. I have to admit I have been sitting on ALOT of rice packs and using ALOT of tiger balm. But hey at least I am med free! Minus the tylonal!
YOU ALL CAN DO THIS!!!! It is the best decision I ever made. I never thought I could feel so free! Thank the LORD!!!!
For the last 6 months, I came to the conclusion that I have used my RX to medicate me emotionally as well as realizing I am addicted (in the sense of a physical addiction). I have been prescribed the maximum amount daily and my doctor has not even questioned my use (or abuse) for my chronic pain. The past two months have I used more daily to get high (actually, to get that dreamy sleepy feeling) and I find myself with 2 pills left as stupidly, I thought I could go from 8-12 pills a day to 1. My body is going into physical withdrawl (and trust me, as soon as I get through this, I am so done with this medication) and I wondered if I should split the last 2 pills into 25mg and have a slower taper. I have to wait until October 1 if I do a refill. I do not want to do this option as I realize that the last two years have been a blur and a waste of time. I started to abuse the quantity after a very bad break up of a relationship and to escape, this medication did the trick. It also caused me to gain about 30 pounds due to inactivity and very poor eating habits. Almost as I just let everything go and fall into that nice euphoric place. I felt and feel now like a sloth...all I did was sleep pain (physical and emotional) away except I cannot see doing this the rest of my life. I find myself feeling very angry at myself as I never saw what I was doing as addictive, rather I thought I was treating my pain.
I would so appreciate anyone's thoughts on this...and, if this drug is also used for depression...will I spin out by not taking it anymore? I believe it helped with the depression I was feeling but in the last year, even medicated, I was still depressed (though euphoric!).
I have to commend Emily and all the other brave souls here. I am embarassed at myself but believe all posters are incredibly brave and I have a great deal of respect for the knowledge, kindness, and openness shown in all the posts.
Time2stop- were you on ultram or tramadol? Or something else? What you describe is unusual for tramadol, but maybe you have an unusual response. Tramadol usually gives you energy and lifts mood, causes wt loss. Maybe not for you.
Be angry at the pills! Taking this stuff is not living. Taking these pills is being a slave to something thatbcontrols you and keeps you FROM living. Cut them and taper off and do not refill. You will go thru about 3-5 days of feeling really bad. Look back on these posts for remedies you can help yourself with. You may feel like you have a bad flu. Restless leg syndrome (RLS), headache, chills, low grade temp, diarrhea, foggy thinking. You Amy have all or just some of these withdrawal symptoms, but they will not last too long. Just hang in there and by day 5 you will feel some better. By day 14 you will be doing fairly well and day 30 you are mostly done with WD.
My thoughts as I was coming off were - whe was I ever going to quit?? When I am 80?? Do I really want to continue to take these pills when most of the time they made me feel bad? Do I like counting pills, worrying about this stuff all then time?? NO! It's not living present with my family or at work. I couldn't concentrate- all I wanted to do is go around and talk at work. Got nothing done. Be done with this in your life!
Hope everyone had a good weekend. Blessedmommy- I for one am very excited about your baby coming tomorrow. You will be in my prayers. Let us know asap how things go tomorrow.
Let's all have a great week and BE STRONG warriors !! Fight every day to get free and to stay free of. Bondage to these pills and the lies they tell you as to why you need them. Remember, those of us who are now free, remember your anger against the pills and what they have done. Go forward to a good life and a free life. We can never as much a touch one again. Never!!
Hi everybody. Im brand new to this. Thanks for any answers.
I am currently pregnant (8wks) and addicted to tramadol. I started taking it about 2yrs ago for a back injury because my Dr told me it was safe and non-addictive. Ha! What a joke. Ive tried to stop only to start again within days because the WDs were to awful to endure. I quit when I first found out I was pregnant for about 4days because I was afraid it would hurt my baby. Its all I could stand. I wasnt able to sleep at all, wasnt able to be still, its like I constantly had to move, was in the bed twisting and flipping around like crazy (that was the worse part). I had terrible anxiety and would wake up absolutely drenched in sweat. Then on the 4th day I started cramping so bad that I got scared and started taking it again. Within 30min. I was fine, normal. I only take 2a day now. I was taking 4 50mg a day. I guess Im wondering what to do. Whats worse on the baby...the trams or WDs? Please any answers are greatly appreciated.
Dear Ones...this travel schedule is about to get the best of me...Just wanted to come out here and say "welcome" to all the new folks out here who are taking on this nasty drug...If you read back a bit you will see my struggles ..along with many others.. I am 152 days out today..and very, very grateful. This is doable folks..it really is..if you have to take an anger stance..then by all means take it...you are absolutely justified in your anger..as this insidious drug robs us of so much..relationships, jobs, money, our santity!! but make no mistake...as you attempt to get off...it will call you..try to lure you back..and the force of that lure cannot be underestimated.. it will try to tell you that you have no life without using..that you have no energy...that you have no happiness (as if being on tramadol makes you genuinely happy, NOT) Believe me ...it will do everything in it's power to reel you back into using...do not fall for it...the withdrawal is sometimes a tough price to pay...but so worth it my friends. and though I have no relapsed (thank you God)...I've heard others say that when they fall off and go back to using again..it does not have the same effect ... you end up taking more to try and get even close to how you felt in the height of your former use. Not worth it.... supplements, exercise, therapy, prayer...posting out here...all/everything that you are feeling.....these are the things that will help you get thru all this. It's not easy...to be sure...no one ever said it would be easy.. but I so appreciate fact that my interactions with life and people are genuine now..not masked by the tram .. I can laugh and cry and feel now..in a way I was unable to do for years while on Tram.
So I send out prayers for strength and courage for all of you..no matter where you are on your journeyand the promise that it will get better...
Love, Blessings and Hope
p.s. please forgive me for not addresssing each of you invidually..sadly there are so many of us out here....with such struggles ..absolutely astounds me the far reaching impact of this drug... but I do see you all and wish you all well. and once i am back from travels I will try to catch up.
Hello survivors, I have been reading everyones fantastic and insightful posts for 12 days now, and deceide to post something. I have been under this demon pills charms for about 15 years now. I was first given Ultram when it was so fresh & sparkling new on the us market, 1995, I was 22..I can still remember the doctor handing me the rx and saying how fantastic this new drug was, "non-addictive, not like other pain killers" (I have deg disc dis in L5-S1) b/c the usual pain pills made me sick, "so here you go young one, enjoy" wow, now speed up to now, age 37 and finally SICK of these monsters. This is embarrassing to admit, but I know every single person here will understand, I have been arrested 2ce now b/c of this demon drug...I know I am to blame for going about in illegal means to obtain them, but the thought process in our brains while taking this poison is something so tragic and surreal. I went cold turkey off of them, b/c I was in jail, so no taper for me, but do feel now ON DAY 14!!!!! that was the only way for me.
For so long I have felt I would never ever be able to live without them, but since I had 3 days in the most horrendous conditions, and no choice but to go c/t, wow, what a eye opener(that is def an understatement) I had about pills 30 in my purse when I got home, but my mom found them and made me flush them down the toilet (ever want to drink toilet water, anyone? no, well I did at that fleeting moment) and that made me realize again, WTF? I want to drink the toilet water these demons are swimming in, I swore I saw one wave at me and say, Come on! The water feels fine! OMG, I have stooped to such awful and extreme measures b/c of this pill, that now at 14 days Tram free, I honestly do not know who that person was. I do have to put in that in 2002, I did go to rehab, and was clean for about 4 years. I then got sick and had to have major neck surgery, and of course, could not take the "normal" pain meds, so it was back onto round 2 of tramadol. When I first started them, I was taking ALOT! Prob 20-30 a day. I slept my life away basically. Then the 2nd time, I told myself, ok, these pills make me feel good, why is that so wrong? So did keep it in check with the max dose of 8 pills a day. But it is all lies we tell ourselves so we don't feel like absolute crap about taking them, or starting yet again. I know now, that for some freakin reason I cannot, cannot EVER again take this crap, my brain loves it too much, because then it does not have to WORK, I cannot believe how numb I was making myself, when you take them you think you are doing the exact opposite, it is nuts!
Onto my w/d symptoms, yes day 1-3 SUCK, my day 4 & 5 were actually ok, but then day 6,7,8 were worse then day 3 for me, I have no idea why, but they were. I actually stopped taking Tylenol Pm &/or Unisom when stopped the Tram, b/c as we all know, if we took that tram too close to bed time, we would be UP, so had to take something to counteract that, to try and sleep, so none of that and no coffee. my first days I was so hypersensitve to smells, I thought I was superhuman, that is no exageration either, but they were so overwhelming! Also, super sensitive to caffeine, hence why I had to stop it. On day 11 I broke out in HIVES all over my body, the strangest feeling ever throughout every limb. Tried looking to see if this was apart of tramadol w/d, and guess what i found, it IS a symptom of Effexor w/d, which we all know is trams chemical twin (just no opiate)...the next day, I felt different, no more crawling out of my skin feeling FINALLY...Music and exercise and SUN help wonders. luckily I live in Florida, where there is plenty of it and it is free...I walk everyday, and keep those earphones and mp3 player on, I am not sure why music you love works, but it DOES, just get lost in the music you love, it helps, or get angry with it, whatever works!
well here it is DAY 14 Tramadevil free...I thought I would be taking this for the rest of my life, but I am finally seeing that it was all a figment of my tramadol mind & imagination...I could put in so much more behaviors this has caused, stories and the like, but honestly, I am so sick of even thinking about them, that I just want to think about the new behaviors and storis from this day forward being free.
Every single person on this fight is a true hero, to yourselves #1 this war *****, but you will I PROMISE see better days. Not only are you physically w/d'ing, but the psycho crap is there too, at certain times of the day, I still feel like I have to reach in my purse for my UP dose, for whatever occasion that comes up, b/c you feel like you cannot do anything functional without a dose, GOD what a waste of human emotions and feelings! Keep strong everyone, and THANK you so much to everyone who even just posts a sentence, you are doing so much for everyone, and we all WILL DOMINATE this war. Love and peach always
Hi Everyone - I found this forum today, and thought I would write my story for all of you to read, and of course for support. I've had a lot of medical issues this year, they started in January when I passed two kidney stones (WORSE than childbirth for sure) then I had my wisdom teeth removed in February (painful complications), then I started feeling a LOT of pain in March and ended up being diagnosed with a bad gallbladder and had surgery to have it removed in April (months of internal discomfort). Then I passed another kidney stone in August. While all of this was going on, my husband and I have both been unemployed, we had to file chapter 13 in June in order to keep our home, and are trying to raise our 16 month old BEAUTIFUL son. I've been on and off several opiates over the past year, but a couple of months ago, I was prescribed tramadol. I have addiction issues....so does my husband, over the past 5 years we've been on and off hydrocodone, and tramadol a handful of times and HARD withdrawals each time. With everything going on, we got sucked back into the dark world of tramadol. We've both been taking them for almost 3 months, I was taking MUCH more than he was. I was taking about 5 or 6 50mg pills a day. And he was taking about 3 of them a day.
Yesterday, something happened to me. I have NO idea what happened, but it scared the heck out of me. My heart started fluttering, i got really bad sweats and chills and became very weak. I took my "normal" 5 pills, so i have no idea what happened. The only thing I could come up with, is that the tramadol make me sick...that my body couldn't take it anymore. I layed in bed last night, and this morning I woke up feeling like I was on my 3rd day of withdrawal. What the heck is going on? No clue, but I've decided to stop taking them all today. I took one this morning, because I was considering tapering, but it made me really sick again. So after a heartfelt conversation (and lots of crying)with my wonderful husband, we have decided that we are DONE with them FOREVER. We brought the rest of the pills into the bathroom and flushed them. My husband put 6 of them aside, so that he can be somewhat functional (to take care of our son and dogs) over the next few days while I am going through the awful early withdrawal. Then when I am somewhat able to function again, he is going to go through the withdrawal. We made a pact...we are really done this time...for us, and more importantly for our son. I can do ANYTHING for him. I love him more than life itself. I know this is going to be really horrible...but I'm going to try to be strong. I really think it helps to read other people going through the same thing. Power in numbers...the more people that can get of this awful drug the better.
I'm feeling awful already. I can't regulate my body temperature. I have a horrible headache, my legs are so restless and feel like they need to be stretched. I am crying A LOT. I feel very sad...sad that I got myself into this again, sad that I let this horrible drug take my life over again, I'm a parent now, my son deserves better than this. It hurts me so badly to think of it. I need to be strong, I need as much help as I can get. I've been trying to drink a lot of water. I'm crying now, so I'm going to try to lay down and relax. Thank you so much for your support. I appreciate any and all comments.
Hello, good people. I had nearly 4 years on 2 X 150mg ER after slicing all the nerves in my right arm when I fell through glass. Tram seemed to work well reducing the pain but slowly I developed severe respiratory problems; did the tour of lung specialist, cardio, ENT and none of them linked my problems to tram. I live in New Zealand but my daughter is a medical journalist in London, UK and when I made a reference in a recent email to tram, she spat the dummy and told me it was almost certainly the cause of the respiratory problems. Tram is not commonly used in New Zealand and the pain specialist who prescribed it had never made any mention of side effects! After discussion with my doctor, I switched to 50mg capsules and began tapering but it got to the point where a capsule lifted me up for 2-3 hours and then dropped me with a huge crunch so I went ct instead and now I am on day 7; a fairly hellish week of severe headaches, mega "flu". diarrhea, blurry vision, poor sleep and really wobbly on my feet. No way could I go to work. But it is starting to get easier, thankfully. Of course, even after 4 years, the arm is still painful but I guess, if I want to live, then I have to learn to live with the pain.
Great to read all your posts and know I am not alone in fighting this.
God bless you all.
Hi again, can anyone tell me if there is anything one can do about the sneezing? I am sneezing at length and violently a dozen times a day and my nostrils are raw! I have tried antihistamine but it doesn't seem to help. I am in day 10 of ct and other symptoms have eased considerably but the sneezing is getting worse. Does anyone have any suggestions?
Perdido: Your sneezing could actually be what is called a myoclonic jerk as a result of your cessation of tramadol. The most commonly seen OD symptoms of tramadol are respiratory distress and seizures. Here's where your situation gets interesting: a myoclonus is a form of a seizure. The fact that both of the above symptoms involve the respiratory system, it can be almost founded that tramadol is/has had an effect on your respiratory system.
You indicated that you'd fallen- I'm merely speculating but, have you ever been tested for seizures in the past? Any family history of seizures? Seizure disorders can be mistaken for simple clumsiness or a random accident. Is it unfair to assume your fall could have been the result of a seizure?
You can go to every lung specialist in the world and they'll say your lungs are fine- which they seem to be. You need to see a neurologist-imho the source isn't in your lungs, it's in your brain.
Hello everyone - I found this forum today while doing a search on Tramadol withdrawals and now I see after reading most of the previous posts that I am not going crazy from this deceptive drug. I am a 42 year old male who suffers from a bulging disc and arthritis in my lower back. I was prescribed Tramadol from a doc to mask the pain and it was great to begin with but that was only an illusion the drug created. Over a period of a year I began to increase my dosage after the initial prescribed dosage (8 pills a day) did not give me the desired relief. That was my biggest mistake. I soon began taking up to 20 pills a day for the next several months. I made the mistake of running out twice and suffered terrible withdrawals (tremors, cold sweats, etc.). Two weeks ago I was running low and made the decision that it was time to come clean so I entered a detox facility. After spending four days in detox I am now home on I am now on day eleven of being off this evil drug. I am still experiencing withdrawals of severe fatigue, depression, and restless leg syndrome but I know that these will eventually ease up over time. Thankfully the doc approved me for short term disability for the next week as long as I entered an outpatient rehab facility so that I can take some time from work to recover from the abuse of this terrible drug. I believe my biggest help through all of this has been allot of prayer. God bless you all!!!
I'm an Aussie female and I've just found this site. I am writing this with tears streaming down my face and, after reading as many posts as possible in one sitting, I'm sure I'm not the first. What a relief it is!!! I have had to take far too many different medications over the years for Anxiety, Depression and PTSD resulting from my military service. I've also been on many different medications for leg and back pain (Lumbar, thoracic and cervical) due to injuries from a motor bike accident in 1981. I am at a point where I want to get rid of everything and go back to just being 'me'.
I was so relieved to finally find this journal and read that all the discomfort I am going through at the moment is mainly due to Tramal. I have taken tramal for about a year now and have tried to take it as little as possible. I thought I was doing the right thing by not taking tramal after about 6-8pm as I thought I could get by without it over night (at that stage I was taking Endep - Amitryptyline which helped me sleep through anything) and thought that the less I took the better. My various GPs were happy that I was taking it as little as possible but even when I went to them with diarrhea nausea, restless legs and arms, night sweats, extreme exhaustion and a horrible heaviness, none of them mentioned that it could be tramal withdrawal. I would often improve during the day after taking tramal in the morning and would be at my best later in the day. I finally worked it out myself (no surprise to most of you, I'm sure). The doctors put my nausea and diarrhea down to a gastric ulcer and told me to cut down on my coffee and alcohol - I drink 1-2 coffees a day and no more than 8-12 glasses of wine a week - not really enought to cause an ulcer. I didn't take the tabs they gave me for the ulcer but started taking tramal at regular intervals and my 'ulcer' has been cured miraculously.
Every now and then over the past few months I have googled "tramal withdrawal" as I had a suspicion that what I was feeling when I didn't take it was more than exhaustion from pain and was actually tramal withdrawal. I have taken tramal in the past and don't remember having any problems coming off it but I was on Norspan patches at the time which would've helped with that. I started taking tramal again when I went off the patches so now I'm definitely feeling the withdrawal.
Anyway, I'm now taking tramal at regular intervals during the day and the plan is to make the gaps longer and get off it asap. I'm down to one 50mg every 5 hours at the moment and hope to extend that to one every 6hrs then 7hrs etc. I'm not sure if this or cold turkey is the best way to do it but I'm happy to do it this way.
About 4 months ago, after 16 years on Endep (amitriptyline) I changed from that to fluvoxamine )another nightmare entirely). I haven't slept since :-( This was an attempt by me to change to a lesser drug but it has back fired and now I've been put on Seroquel (quetiapine) to help me sleep (it has many other uses including treating the symptoms of schizophrenia and bipolar disorder but I was just using it in a low dose to help me sleep). I gave that up as I thought it was cuasing the horrible heaviness and depression I felt each morning (might not have been the cause??) Now they have put me on to Olanzapine (trade names Zyprexa, Zalasta, Zolafren, Olzapin, Oferta, Zypadhera) to help me sleep. I avioded it at first thinking it would just be like Seroquel but gave up after about 2 weeks averaging 2-5hrs sleep a night. I just had a 12 hour sleep last night so have had to grab a tramal as soon as I woke up.
Enough rambling, I'm just happy to find this journal and wish everyone here all the best with getting rid of tramal and it's horrible effects. Now, when I'm having a sleepless night I can at least come out here and read some posts. I will be looking for some nice natural withdrawal treatments soon so thank you all for your posts.
PS - One thing that kinda helps sometimes is talking books. I have started to borrow books on CD from the library and some nights when I can't sleep I listen to them. Even if I don't following the story it is just nice having someone read to you and can help a bit. I've usually got heat packs on various bits as well. It can be a bit of a nice distraction at times.
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